


To live and die alone

by judelaw



Category: Captain Marvel (2019), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: (but I hope it's alright nonetheless!), (due to the lack of canon in the mcu regarding yon-rogg I'm making up my own background for him), (there are some things in earlier chapters I would write differently, (this was made before the release of the deleted scenes so Yon sees someone else), Angst, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Canon, Redemption, Slow Burn, Torture, Yonvers - Freeform, enemies to friend to lovers?, now that we have more information about him), or maybe not who knows with Yon, somewhat of a character study, the question isn't if she will forgive him but rather if she should
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-10-26
Packaged: 2019-11-15 05:39:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 91,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18067616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/judelaw/pseuds/judelaw
Summary: “Was there anything you told me thatwasn’ta lie?”“Yes.”Maybe he shouldn’t say it. Maybe he should just say that every single thing, every compliment, every laugh they shared together during those six years, had just been a lie. Nothing more. Maybe she would finally kill him then, relieve him from this misery.He just wanted this to be over.He was a failure. And needed to end as one.But this wasn’t about him. And for once in his life he realized that. This wasn’t about what he did or didn’t deserve, it was about whatshedeserved. And she deserved to hear the truth - just for once – and he would provide her with it.“Iamproud of you.”





	1. Letting Go

He can’t remember how it happened. The blow of whatever hit his head had wiped out any memory of how he got into this situation. But even if he _did_ remember what use would it be?

He had checked every single inch of his tiny, and weirdly moisty, cell several times and has yet to discover any, even the tiniest, weakness in the structure that he could turn into a way to escape.

Yon-Rogg doesn’t know for how long he’s been here, he had no way of looking outside to tell whether it was day or night and considering they were somewhere in outer space, he wouldn’t be able to measure the time anyway. No matter how long it has been, it was _too_ long.

He knew no one would be coming to rescue him and in a way the thought of that made him proud. His superiors knew he won’t give out any information – no matter how long the enemy would torture him – and therefore it was unnecessary to come looking for him. And he truly had not said a single word since he arrived, no matter how bad, how unbearable their methods have gotten. But his pride aside, he still wished someone would bother enough to look for him.

The food he got, if you want to call it that, was enough to keep him alive but not nearly enough to really provide him with any energy he could use to fight back. The first few times they had dragged him out of his cell to this small room he’d only call hell from that point on, he didn’t make any noise, wanting to spoil any pleasure his tortures could possibly get out of this. But now he just let it happen. He didn’t have the strength to suppress his scream anymore – and he also lost the strength to actually care.

In a way dying felt a lot like letting go. Something he hadn't been able to do since God knows how long.

It was funny in a way, he thought. He always imagined he’d die in a battle, heroically, knowing he had served his people and the Starforce well. To die alone in this godforsaken place felt like an insult to him. But then again, even if he would die on a battlefield, he’d still be alone.

He cooled one of the fresh cuts he had just gotten by gently resting the bruised skin against the cold, wet wall. He didn’t care anymore that this would most likely lead to an infection, he’ll die anyway. All he wanted was to get rid of the pain even if it was just for a few minutes. He needed to rest. Prepare himself for the next time they come back. Lately the intervals of rest had gotten smaller so it won’t take long until they’ll return. Yon-Rogg closed his eyes, trying to find a peaceful place somewhere in his mind. A place that could take him away from this one.

However, all his mind could come up with was a face.

He wondered what Vers — no, Carol was her name, right? He wondered what Carol was up to right now. Not having seen her in years should have been enough to slowly forget about her but she was too present everywhere for that to happen. And he wasn’t complaining. He didn’t _want_ to forget about her.

The universe was an enormous place, filled with so many planets and species and yet somehow the stories of her heroic adventures always reached Hala in some way or another.

He should be angry or worried or whatever his superiors felt when they were talking about how and when to finally stop her but all he felt was a certain level of excitement. Even pride.

He knew he had nothing to do with how strong she had gotten – unless one wanted to count the fact that she only shot the drive (that led to her getting these powers) because of him – which he didn’t. No matter who would have been standing there, threating to kill her, she still would have shot the drive.

The years of training he made her go through weren’t really contributing to her powers either, even though he likes to think that she _did_ learn a few military tactics from him. But apart from that he never felt like he was accountable for her being as powerful as she is now.

But he was proud of her nonetheless.

Wherever she was, he sincerely hoped she was in a better place than him. And considering if she was in his situation, she’d just blast the bars or even walls away, she most likely was.

Thinking of her powers, he almost thought he had just imagined the sound of an explosion rather close by but as the second explosion followed, he quickly realized they weren’t just happening in his head.

The third explosion was smaller but only a few feet away. If he would actually care about his life at this point, he’d stand up and at least try to figure out where they were coming from. But it was probably way more comfortable to die in an explosion than to die by torture. Or hunger. Or loneliness.

Just as he thought he had only imagined the explosions at first, he also thought he must clearly imagine the voice he was just hearing. There was _no way_ it was actually real. Maybe he had gotten a fever and was hallucinating, he felt so miserable he wouldn’t even be able to tell.

But he wasn’t.

_“Stay close.”_

No.

_“I’ll get you out of here, don’t worry.”_

Why _her_?

By the time Yon-Rogg fully realized what was going on, the door of his prison cell had already swung open with hole, whose edges were still glowing red, where the lock had been.

“Vers!” He stood up out of surprise, completely forgetting the pain it caused him. And for a moment he forgot they weren’t on the same side anymore as well.

“Oh, wow. I need to check what’s behind doors before opening them in the future,” she said with a certain annoyance in her voice that he had missed a lot oddly enough.

“I’m fine, thanks for asking.”

“Fuck you.”

“I’m too busy trying not to die but thanks for the suggestion anyway.”

Just now he noticed the handful of civilians behind her who have been the other prisoners in the cells next to him. It wasn’t like he _really_ thought she had come to rescue _him_ but he was still a bit disappointed that he wasn’t the reason why she was there.

A distant voice yelling commands stopped their banter immediately.

“Make yourself useful and keep them together while I find a way out. Or make one.”

Nodding with her head over her shoulder she ran off, not even waiting for Yon-Rogg’s reply but he immediately did as she said. He didn’t even know _why_ he was following her order at all but it felt like the most natural thing to him.

Keeping an eye on the civilians had been harder than expected – he sometimes simply forgot how scary explosions or gun fire could be for people who aren’t used to it – but he managed to get them all to follow Carol and on their way took out a few guards as additionally.

Thanks to her ability to make doors when there are none, they made their way back to where she had, well, _parked_ her ship pretty quick.

They both waited for all the prisoners to get inside and only then Carol made her way through the door as well. Yon-Rogg didn’t move. It was clearly an accident that she had freed him in the first place. She didn’t want him there and he honestly couldn’t blame her. Also dying here was probably way less of a humiliation than explaining to his superiors that he got rescued by Carol Danvers.

“For fucks sake, stop being such a pain in the ass.”

Before he knew it she had already grabbed his collar, pulled him into the ship and closed the door right behind him.

“If you were so kind to take over the arms it would be greatly appreciated,” she scoffed, basically pushing him onto the chair.

As it turned out, Carol had already destroyed the vast majority of their ships which led to them getting followed by only two that were easy to take out. He had been really excited to be a part of a battle again for a moment and it was over way too quickly for his liking.

Especially since he didn’t know what to do now.

The spacecraft they were in was rather small and therefore perfect for the kind of mission Carol had taken on. It just had enough room for the couple of civilians she rescued and could easily be flown by one person alone. He didn’t know how she even got into the ship he was captured in in the first place and he truly regret not having been able to witness it.

He watched Vers, no, Carol, who felt safe enough now to turn on the autopilot, taking care of the people that owe their life to her by providing them with medical aid and food. It reminded him of a small mission they were on years ago on a rather poor planet where he had to physically restrain her from trying to help every single child they encountered. Back then her behavior was annoying to him but now all he could do was admire her.

Yon-Rogg liked to think he wasn’t a bad person. He truly cared about other people. But somewhere along the way he had grown numb to the suffering of others and all he could focus on was the mission. It had proven to be incredibly helpful for climbing up the military ranks but when he actually held on and thought about what he was doing, he was disgusted with himself. Yet he had no other choice.

What use would it have been to hate himself every night for what he did to Vers, for using her without her knowledge, making her serve people that weren’t even her own? It wouldn’t have changed her situation. Or his. So all he had done during the six years he had spent with her was lying. Not only to her but also to himself.

And he did a really good job. It came only crashing down when he was on his way back to Hala after having failed his mission, having been beaten by his former pupil. He truly wished she would have just killed him.

And to this day he had been wondering why she didn’t do it.

“You look horrible.”

Her voice brutally pulled him out of his thoughts. For the first time since he had been captured he was able to look down at himself and truly see the damage that had been done to his body. Back in his cell he was always a bit thankful that the lighting wasn’t enough to do so as it helped him pretend he was doing fine. That his body wasn’t betraying him by getting slowly broken by the enemy. Seeing all the cuts and bruises now he hated himself even more for being so weak. For being so weak in front of _her_.

“I see you still run around with this _horrendous_ disfigurement of our uniform,” he replied drily.

“Green was never really my color.”

She looked rather proud and happy in her outfit and Yon-Rogg envied her for it. He hasn’t been feeling about his uniform like that since she had sent him back to Hala.

 “You changed your outfit as well,” she stated, pointing at the lose garments he had been given to wear.

“I wanted to try something new for the season.”

Her smug smile faded as she made a wordless gestured that told him to follow her into the small backroom of the ship. He followed her without any resistance, wondering why she wanted to move their conversation over there but he soon came to the conclusion that she probably didn’t want to kill him in front of the citizens.

He almost felt relieved at that thought. It was stupid, he knew that, and it was just another lie he was telling to himself, but dying next to her would make him feel less alone.

When the door closed, separating them completely from the others, he expected a blow that _did_ came, however completely different from what he had expected.

She had punched him in the face, hard enough to make him see stars and make him wonder if his nose was broken.

“I’m still fucking mad at you, just for the record.”


	2. Holding On

“Good,” he moaned, too exhausted to pretend he wasn’t in pain. “I was wondering where-“

He didn’t get the chance to continue as another blow hit him straight into his stomach.

“How.“

She hit him again.

“Could you.”

And again.

“Do this.”

It wasn’t a question, he knew that. It was an accusation. Or maybe she really _did_ want an explanation but he had no idea what to tell her. There was no great secret scheme behind why he did what he did. He just acted in a way he thought, no, _knew_ was best for the Kree, for the Starforce. It had nothing to do with her, well, not with her personally.

Her blows weren’t strong – at least not as strong as he would have expected them to be, but then again he had also expected to be already lying on the ground, with a hole in his chest. It was almost as if things were back to normal, _his_ normal, where he would get woken up by her banging against his door every morning. As if they were back at Hala, sparring together, getting bruised but never badly, always knowing when to stop to not seriously hurt the other – well, unless Vers lost control again. But they weren’t on Hala. And even though her hits were weak compared to what she _could_ do, he still went down, too weakened by the torture he had to endure, by still being alive.

It was then that she stopped. He was sitting collapsed on the ground, barely able to lean his back against the wall, breathing heavily as his hands didn’t even know where to start holding him for comfort.

He didn’t look at her. He couldn’t.

He just didn’t know what to tell her because he knew that whatever he’d say, it would never justify what he has done to her.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered almost inaudible. “I’m so, _so_ sorry.”

It was the truth even though Yon-Rogg knew that if he could reverse time, he would make the same decision over and over again. He felt sorry for her, the way he had treated her wasn’t fair at all. This wasn’t _her_ conflict. The people of C-53 weren’t involved in the war between Kree and Skrull or even knew about it.

During all those years he spent lying to her, he liked to tell himself _he_ wasn’t to blame for this. That it was Mar-Vell’s fault for involving her in the first place. And it’s true, _she_ was the one who made Carol fight a battle she knew nothing about it. But it was _him_ who pulled her even further into this. He was the one who decided to take her with him, who told the Supreme Intelligence about her powers.

He didn’t know what exactly Mar-Vell had told her before she lost her memory but he knew exactly what the first thing she heard after waking up was. _He_ was the one who talked to her. And even the very first thing he ever said to her was a lie. Their entire relationship was built upon that and he hated himself for it.

Not even for the lying per se. The end justifies the means after all. It was the kind of lie that haunted him.

The first thing she asked once she woke up was predictable yet he hadn’t prepared himself for it. _Where am I? How did I get here?_ He could have told her anything, make up any kind of story. But the one he told her painted him as her hero, the one who saved her from the Skrull, who risked his own life to protect hers. When in reality _he_ was the one who tried to kill her.

He could have told her _anything_. But he desperately wanted to be the hero.

She stood there in silence for a minute until she let herself fall onto the floor to sit right in front of him. He was still looking way, hating himself for being such a coward. Why couldn’t she just kill him? Was this torture, this stalling of the inevitable, part of her revenge?

He couldn’t say he didn’t deserve it.

He wasn’t a hero. He would never be one. And lying to make her believe he was one was only further proof of that.

“Was there _anything_ ,” she was resting her forehead on her hand, not due to exhaustion but frustration. “You told me that _wasn’t_ a lie?”

Silence followed that got only interrupted by his heavy breathing – a sound he hated to hear. Why did his body have to betray him like that? His lungs, his heart. How could he be considered an honorable Kree warrior if he couldn’t even control his own breath?

“Yes.”

Maybe he shouldn’t say it. Maybe he should just say that every single thing, every compliment, every laugh they shared together during those six years, had just been a lie. Nothing more. Maybe she would finally kill him then, relieve him from this misery.

He just wanted it to be over.

He was a failure. And needed to end as one.

But this wasn’t about _him_. And for once in his life he realized that. This wasn’t about what he did or didn’t deserve, it was about what _she_ deserved. And she deserved to hear the truth - just for once – and he would provide her with it.

“I _am_ proud of you.”

Whatever Carol expected to hear, he could see this wasn’t it. Her face painted a picture of surprise and confusion with a hint of suspicion. He couldn’t blame her for any of these emotions. Even though he’d rather she wasn’t that ridiculously easy to read – but again this wasn’t about him.

She punched him again.

“Stop lying for fuck’s sake,” she growled, growing more and more impatient with him.

Holding his bleeding nose he protested for the first time since she had rescued him. He didn’t blame her for not trusting him but he also wouldn’t let her accuse him of lying when for once he wasn’t.

“I am not!” His voice sounded more high-pitched than he intended to. “ _I am fucking proud of you_.”

Another thing hit his face and for a moment he wondered why she wasn’t punching him any harder – then he realized it was a towel that hit him. Picking it up from his lap, he held it against his nose, looking at her puzzled.

“Don’t make my ship all bloody or you can clean up the mess.”

“I’m _terribly_ sorry for my nose to so suddenly start bleeding without any external impact having caused it to do so.”

It was only a very brief moment, almost too short for the eye to see and for the brain to process, but for a millisecond she had smiled at him.

“Do you want to redeem yourself?”

The question wasn’t anything he expected to hear from her and he didn’t have any real answer for it. Did he? Yes, he was sorry for lying to Carol but he was sorry for _her_. Not for _what he had done_. At least not enough to truly regret having taken her with him that day. The Kree could need such a strong weapon – such a strong warrior. She would have been essential in winning the war against the Skrull. And he would never be sorry for trying to protect his people from these horrible creatures and their terrorist acts.

It was Mar-Vell’s fault for involving her in this. It was the Skrulls’ fault for not giving up and therefore finally make room for peace between them that could last for generations - even though they could never be fully trusted. Maybe it was even Carol’s fault for blindly trusting both Mar-Vell _and_ the Skrulls.

But if everyone else was to blame for the situation as well then why did he still feel so horrible?

“What do you want me to do?”

“I need to take them,” she was pointing at the door behind her. “To a safe planet. Their home is completely destroyed and I’m hoping they can build a new, better future for themselves elsewhere.”

“But what do you want _me_ to do, Ver-” her glace was more terrifying than any of her glowing fists could ever be. “- Carol?”

“The planet I have in mind makes us pass another one that’s controlled by the Kree – and it’s impossible for them to not notice us.”

“Why don’t you just let me take them to exactly _that_ planet so that _we_ can find a new home for them?” He was sincerely confused by her plan.

“I don’t trust the Kree.”

“You are one yourself-“

Another hit followed but this time it missed him, seriously damaging the wall right next to his head. If she could punch through metal like this, his head surely would have been gone had it been the target.

“I’m from _Earth._ ”

He had tried not to flinch, he really had, but he couldn’t help but automatically move away from where her fist was still stuck in the wall.

Part of him wanted to see how far he could take it before she’d kill him. If him mentioning that his blood, Kree blood, was running through her veins would be enough to set her off.

But instead he said: “ _I_ am Kree.”

And out of all Kree he really should be the last she would want to trust.

“Do you want to play your part now or not?” She was obviously annoyed.

“You are dancing around the word _‘help’_ a lot.”

He knew he shouldn’t be teasing her but not only did he stop caring if and when she’d kill him; it was also all he knew. Their banter has always been a huge part of their relationship and it had been more than refreshing to have someone under him who wouldn’t be afraid to stand up to him.

And it would have been yet another lie to say he hasn’t missed this over the past years.

“I don’t need your _help_. I’m giving you a chance.”

“Let’s pretend I believe you, you still didn’t tell me what _exactly_ you want me to do. I can’t move the planets away from each other.”

But he was seriously wondering if _she_ could.

“You are by far less suspicious than I would be. If you are the one navigating the ship, no one will smell a rat.”

“A what?”

“No one will suspect anything,” she explained impatiently as if it was his fault for not knowing every idiom in the English language.

Still slightly confused he understood what she wanted from him yet already saw the flaws in her plan, making him seriously reconsider his teaching methods: “First of all, I will have to contact Ronan and explain to him how I managed to escape my tormentors and steal a ship. Then I will have to come up good reason why I’m heading towards that planet of yours instead of going right back to Hala and _then_ your little scheme may work.”

“Great, so you are in.”

“No, I was just explaining what you didn’t consid-“

He held on. Was there any real reason he _shouldn’t_ help her? The people she was trying to smuggle were just harmless refugees; they aren’t any threat for the Kree Empire. By helping her he could not only at least begin to make up for the lies he had told her all those years but also maybe regain her trust. Lying to her had been the wrong way to make her fight for the Kree, he knew that - now. But perhaps could make her see that this would be the right thing to do by being, well, a friend.

Something inside of him told him he was taking a completely wrong approach to this but what did he care about some small feeling of guilt. His emotions didn’t matter. His mind did.

And his mind was telling him to help her.

Maybe he could make things right again. Maybe he could return home alongside Carol. Maybe he could be a hero after all. If not to her at least to the Kree.

“Yes. I will _help_ you,” he made sure to emphasize the word.

Carol just ignored him yet seemed to be pretty pleased with herself. He didn’t want to admit it to himself but he had missed seeing her smile like that. A lot.

Before leaving the small room, she threw some kind of medical kit at him that was not even close to the standards he was used to but at this point he would have been thankful for a dirty bandage and half a plaster.

“Patch yourself up. But hurry.”

“I wouldn’t have to do as much work if someone would have been a _little_ gentler today.”

“Oh, right,” she stopped midmotion, turning around and for a moment he seriously thought she’d apologize. But instead she punched him in the face again, only this time it was way more brutal than before.

“That’s for Dr. Lawson.”

He didn’t think it was fair she was punishing him for killing a traitor but he knew way better than to say anything. If he wanted her to trust him again, he had to at least pretend he was somewhat sorry for that – for now. Until she finally understands that he did the right thing.

She had left the room and Yon-Rogg took the opportunity to undress to see the full extent of his wounds. Some of the old cuts had already started healing; however the newer ones were much deeper and would take way more time to heal completely. They would most certainly leave scars which bothered him a lot. Not for aesthetic reasons of course, he couldn’t care less about that. But they would be a lifelong reminder of his failures, of how he not only got captured but also couldn’t free himself alone.

As he took care of the more serious ones, he distracted his mind from the pain by thinking about how soon he will be able to make for his weakness, his incapability.

He will return to Hala with possibly the stronger warrior in the universe. The Supreme Intelligence will praise him for it, every Kree will celebrate him. He will not only make his father, his brother proud but most importantly: will make _himself_ proud.

He knew he wouldn’t fuck this up. He knew he would be victorious.

But why did he still feel so miserable?


	3. Old Habits

The conversation with Ronan was as annoying as he had expected it to be. He never liked him and had only grown more and more wary of him over the years – but the feeling was mutual. It wasn’t jealousy, even though it certainly was unfair that Ronan was much taller than him, it was more of an instinct (he didn’t like to call it a gut feeling). Something about Ronan wasn’t right. And he was also just incredibly tiresome.

Stepping outside the room, he looked for Carol as he really needed to consult her about the about the plan - if one wants to call it that. He didn’t even know which planet she wanted to go to but he really hoped it wasn’t _too_ far away. On the other hand, he may need some time to befriend her and regain, _earn_ her trust; perhaps a planet at the other end of the galaxy would be a blessing.

Thankfully there weren’t a lot of options she could have gone to on this poor excuse of a ship, so he quickly found her in the command room without having had to ask anyone for directions. Not that he had anything against his fellow former prisoners; he just really wasn’t in a talkative mood.

“You _still_ look horrible,” she said without looking up when he entered.

For a moment he wanted to counter with something witty, how he knew she had actually always liked his face – even when she wouldn’t admit it - but he really didn’t have the nerve for this after having just talked to Ronan.

The lack of a reply however didn’t bother Carol at all: “Alright. We need to figure out what kind of excuse you can use to-“

“I already told Ronan I’m following one of my captors as they may have crucial information we could use in our war against the Skrull.” He said drily, sitting down on the seat next to her without waiting for an invitation to do so.

“See, I knew you’d do your job. Following orders is what you’re good at.”

He wasn’t even sure if she meant it as an insult or a compliment but at the same time he also didn’t care. His eyes and mind wandered to the endless space in front of him, watching the stars or rather their light as some of them had already burned out. He envied them. Wasn’t that everyone’s goal? To still have a light after you’ve been long gone?

He thought about how easy it was for giant sphere of plasma and gas to archive that and yet how hard it was for everyone else.

Yon-Rogg was glad about finally seeing something that wasn’t metal walls and unfriendly faces. And the universe was the most welcome change. Even when he had just joined the military, he always enjoyed the traveling the most. The thrill of the battle, the overwhelming joy of victory, they were what kept him going but there was something special about being out here, free.

“You have never told me who you see,” Carol stated and though he didn’t look at her, he could hear the smug smile on her face.

He groaned: “Not that again.”

“C’mon. It’s me isn’t it?”

“Even if it _were_ you I see,” which he totally didn’t of course. “What do you gain from that?”

“Some kind of pride, maybe.”

“Oh, so you _want_ me to see you because you admire me after all,” he was teasing and not believing anything of what he had just said but it was too much fun to see getting irritated. “Maybe it’s me _you_ see after all.”

“I saw Mar-Vell.”

Right. For a moment he wanted to ask if that had change, for a moment he forgot they weren’t on the same side anymore. There was undeniably some kind of tension between them; however apart from that their conversations seemed so… normal. As if nothing had changed.

Or maybe he was just lying to himself.

And then he wondered if she will still see Mar-Vell once she is back on Hala, rejoining the Kree.

“You don’t have something like the Supreme Intelligence on C-53, right?” He knew the answer but wanted to unnoticeably shift the conversation away from the topic.

After he had found her, he had studied every record he could find about the Terran’s culture. And while a lot of them seemed to believe in a supernatural being that leads them – and only them as Terran’s are known for their arrogance and ignorance, for thinking they were special as ‘intelligent’ creatures when they were incredibly underdeveloped -  they always chose a Terran, or human as they like to call themselves, to be their leader.

However, none of the documents he had read could prepare him for Vers – or Carol.

“Earth,” she insisted.

“I won’t get an entirely new set of vocabulary just for you.”

“It’s _Earth_.”

“What kind of name is that anyway,” it wasn’t a question, rather an affront. There even was almost disgust in his voice.

“What kind of name is Hala?” She snapped yet he could tell she was still amused.

Yon-Rogg pretended he wasn’t hurt in his national pride. He didn’t want to give her the satisfaction.

“But to answer your question: no. I’m already glad if I can find _any_ sign of intelligence on there.”

He didn’t want to and he really hated himself for doing it anyway but he laughed. It wasn’t just a quick smile or noise, he actually laughed. He had missed her. And so he had missed laughing like that.

Despite knowing it was a just joke he still couldn’t help but to ask: “Then why did you choose Earth over Hala?” He almost added ‘and these dense beings over the Kree’ but he thought better of it.

“I understood I was on the wrong side,” she answered calmly, certainly more tranquil than he had expected her to be. Maybe she _had_ learnt to control herself over the years. “It had nothing to do with Earth. Or Hala. Or you – if your ego keeps telling you that. And now stop avoiding my question: Who do you see?”

“ _Stop_ annoying me.”

“I annoy you as much as I want, you aren’t my commander anymore.”

“As if _that_ has ever stopped you.”

She grinned and he almost did so as well but he still didn’t reply to her question.

“Is it your mother? You never mentioned her.”

“She died when I was young; I have no particular memory of her,” that wasn’t true. He actually wanted to keep the lies he told her to a minimum but who one sees when talking to the Intelligence was private and no one else’s business. So it was clearly _her_ who was in the wrong her. She shouldn’t ask, let alone insist like that, at all.

He did remember his mother or rather had one single memory that was so present as if it was just happening in front of his eyes. No matter how much he tried to suppress it, no matter how hard he tried to forget.

“I’m sorry about that,” she honestly was.

He shrugged, emotionless: “Death is a part of life.”

“She was your mother,” Carol said stunned. She knew Yon-Rogg wasn’t exactly sentimental, but she had still expected him to be a bit more… sensitive.

“I don’t remember her. Besides, wasn’t your question _who I see_?” He had no interest in keeping this conversation up either way. He neither wanted to talk about his mother nor the Supreme Intelligence. Both brought unpleasant memories back into his conscious.

She groaned: “With your ego and heart you probably don’t see anyone.”

“Would that be a bad thing?”

“Having someone you look up to would make you more… human.”

“I’m Kree.”

“You know what I mean.”

He did but he didn’t like the implication. Being Terran was in no way better than being a Kree, no matter what she understood under either word; it was quite the opposite actually. Just as being emotional wasn’t better than being in control. Or choosing your strength over your mind. But she never seemed to have understood that and at this point he doubted she ever will.

“Can I ask you a question?” He directly looked at her now, deciding to be more offensive.

“You already did but no, not if you won’t answer mine,” she returned and held his gaze.

Yon-Rogg didn’t say anything for a moment, still not looking away from her, until he finally gave in.

“I don’t look, okay?” That was the best he could come up with. And it wasn’t lie, at least not completely. He didn’t want to see who the Supreme Intelligence would transform to. He knew _exactly_ who it had been but he never had the courage to look up. Never had the courage to face it. Things have changed now that he saw Carol - which he would never admit to her - now he could look up. Look the Supremor straight into its face. And while he wasn’t terrified of it anymore, he still felt awful. Seeing Carol now felt like a betrayal. In many different ways.

And the Intelligence shared that sentiment as he had to painfully learn.

She laughed mockingly: “Why? That’s _really_ impolite of you.”

She didn’t fully believe his answer yet at the same time also couldn’t tell if he wasn’t actually telling the truth after all.

“I answered your question, it’s my turn,” he demanded, knowing perfectly well Carol was the one in power here who could ask him a thousand questions without ever saying anything else to him. But he also knew _her_. And he knew their conversations.

“Alright, go ahead. But no, I _really_ don’t see you,” she sounded blithe. It was almost as if this was just one of many conversations they had during their sparring sessions in which he’d suddenly playfully push her in the middle of giving a lesson, telling her to not get distracted.  

“Why didn’t you kill me?”

She was quiet for a moment.

“I didn’t want to make a mess in my ship.”

“I mean back on C- _… Earth._ ”

“I needed you to deliver a message.”

“No, you didn’t,” he had thought so too at first, but quickly realized this couldn’t be the reason once he arrived at Hala. “Ronan had seen you. And you had seen him. There was no need for any other message.”

“That idiot was there, too?” It was an obvious lie but all Yon-Rogg focused on was her diction. Carol never had any encounter with Ronan that would justify her dislike of him – except for simply being a Kree. He liked to think it was _his_ dislike that made her feel this strongly about him.

“Anyway, you should just be thankful I didn’t kill you.”

 “Sending me back to Hala, defeated and injured, was a disgrace and much more of a punishment than death could have ever been.”

“Well, there you have your answer.”

He didn’t believe her. He would have if they were talking about anyone else but her. It wasn’t because Yon-Rogg thought of himself as so important to her that she just couldn’t kill him, it was more due to knowing how uncontrollable her emotions are, how anger always overwhelmed her. She must have _hated_ him, despised him. Yet she had enough control over herself to not kill him.

Ronan had told him what she did. How she destroyed one of their ships with her bare hands. Killing a Kree was no problem for her. Her powers could probably destroy half of the Kree Empire without anyone being able to come even close to her.

So why didn’t she let her emotion lead her? She had no problems killing all the Kree in that spacecraft, most of which she probably didn’t even know and had no personal grudges against. So why did she hesitate with _him_?

“Besides,” her voice pulled him out of his thoughts. “You didn’t kill me either.”

“I’m no fool; I knew I had no chance against you,” it hurt to admit, especially to her, but they both knew it was the truth so he may as well just say it.

“I was talking about when you shot Mar-Vell yet not me, when I almost died wouldn’t it have been for your blood. However, thanks for admitting I’m far more superior.”

“I didn’t say _that_ ,” he moaned, trying not to defer to this conversation.

“But you know it’s true.”

“I wouldn’t say _far_ more superior,” Yon-Rogg mumbled, crossing his arms like a stubborn child, looking away from her.

“When was the last time _you_ shot a laser beam out of your fists?” She teased.

He rolled his eyes: “You flatter yourself for your powers quite a lot for someone who did absolutely _nothing_ to attain them.”

Yon-Rogg had always been better than her at sparring; physically he was much more vigorous and in a much better shape than her. He was quicker, had more experience. He knew what moves she’d make even before she knew it herself. He was superior in every way and had done a lot to archive and maintain that. But since the first time she couldn’t control herself anymore and knocked him across the entire room, straight into a wall, he knew that he could do whatever he wanted, train as much as he wanted, yet he would never be as stronger as her.

And he was jealous of that.

Sometimes he caught himself wishing _he_ would have shot the drive.

Ever since he had joined the military, he had been the golden boy, the Supreme Intelligence’ most promising soldier. No one had climbed up the ranks as fast as he had. He always took a lot of pride in that, in being special. But when he met Carol he learnt what special really means.

And now that he had failed, disappointed the Supremor, he was just one of many Soldiers. Replaceable. Irrelevant.

But things would change once he brought her back to Hala. Once he had proven his worth again.

Carol didn’t reply, quietly looking at the stars. He watched her, wondering why no anger or at least wit left her mouth. Six years of almost spending every minute together had taught him how to read her, even when she couldn’t understand herself.  Not being called Vers anymore hasn’t changed that. He could tell something was on her mind, that there was something she desperately wanted to say.

But she didn’t.

And he didn’t ask.


	4. Control It

She has never seen him sleep before.

For a moment, she instinctively thought about if she ever had but she knew that if that would have been the case, the memory would be as clear as day in front of her. It’s impossible to forget _this_.

Carol had been speaking with the refugees, about where she takes them, how they can build a future for themselves, a new home. She didn’t know for how she’s been talking, even laughing with them, but when she returned to the command room, Yon-Rogg had fallen asleep in his chair.

He looked so peaceful, so innocent, that it took her a while to remind herself he was neither of these things.

She wanted to be an asshole, a justified one of course, and wake him up brutally, however when she was just about to do so, she stopped. He was slightly wincing in his sleep, obviously still in pain from his time in captivity or even from his _… encounter_ with her.

He had deserved what he got, hell, he would deserve even worse things, she knew that. But when she heard him whimper like that, she couldn’t help herself but to feel sorry for him and wanting to ease his pain. That was the difference about them, _she_ actually cared about others.

_“I thought we lost you.”_

His voice echoed through her head. Back then, when she believed everything he told her, naively perhaps but nothing gave her any reason not to do so, she thought the obvious relief in his voice was real. _That their relationship was real._ And maybe he even really _was_ relieved to know she’s alive, however not because he had worried about losing _her_. He had worried about having lost her powers.

The Kree’s perfect warrior. Or weapon. Or whatever they wanted her to be.

_“I want you to be the best version of yourself.”_

That probably wasn’t a lie either. All that time she really thought he just wanted the best for her _and_ the Kree, but she was only right on that last part. He had never cared about her. He had only taken her with them back to Hala to safe her powers. Not to safe her. That simply had been a side effect.

A welcoming one perhaps, as the Supreme Intelligence obviously saw the potential in her.

_“For the good of all Kree.”_

The phrase used to mean something to her, filled her with pride. The pride of being a part of this, of being a Kree, of being in the Starforce. Now she was just disgusted.

She had been _so_ proud when Yon-Rogg finally told her what she’s been eager to her for almost six years. That he’d talk to the Supreme Intelligence as he thinks she’s ready to join them, _join him_ on their missions. After all those years of just training with him, having to wait for them, for _him_ to return, they all would finally be worth it. She had been so proud he trusted her like that. Because she had trusted him.

She wanted to make the Intelligence proud. Make the Kree proud. And most importantly make _him_ proud of her.

_“I’m so proud of you.”_

She started to drown in anger, in rage. Anger that made her fists glow. _How_ could he do this? How could he lie to her for over six years? If he had only made up a fake story about how they found her, how he rescued her, if he had only told her this one lie, she would still be disgusted by him but not even nearly as angry.

What really hurt her wasn’t the lie.

Or that he shot Mar-Vell.

Both were horrible in their own right but the question that kept her up at night was how he could pretend to be _her friend_. Sure, he was her commander who would order her around all the time, knowing fully well she’d sometimes pretend she couldn’t hear him. He was her mentor who’d kick her ass in training, mocking her for not being able to beat him until she’d sent him flying across the room. He had been her superior, training her, keeping an eye on her – which now she knew wasn’t for her own good even though he had pretended it was.

Their relationship had been of a professional matter.

Yet it was so much more than that.

During her entire time on Hala, he was by far the closest relationship she had. And she had liked to think she was the closest to him as well.

 _He_ was there when she had woken up for the first time, giving her his blood, calming her down. _He_ was the one who had shown her the capital, had explained everything to her, had taken her under his wings. _He_ was the one she ran to the first time she had one of those disturbing dreams - that happened to be disfigured memories. _He_ was the one she ran to for comfort.

Every time.

And while he never hugged or showed her any kind of physical affection (and she would have probably shot him thinking he was Skrull, if he would have every tried) but he was _there_ for her. He listened to her. He kept her mind distracted by sparring. No matter how late or early it was, he _always_ opened the door for her. No matter what. He’d remind her every single time that they have pills for that, pills helping her to sleep – pills that if she’d take them would help _him_ to rest as well - but he never made her take them.

He _never_ turned her down.

She remembered how he _always_ had her back, how he came along when she had to talk to the Supreme Intelligence for the first time, how he recognized how nervous she was and how reassured her. How from that point he was always with her if she needed him, walking with her as far as he was allowed to. As far as he could.

She remembered their first ride into the city, how she had mock him for having no personal life, daring him come along with her to a bar. How she had never expected for her plan to work as she knew how stubborn (and little interested in anything that was remotely fun) he was. Yet, for whatever reason, he had come with her that night. He was complaining, sure, but he was there. Right next to her.

She remembered how she sometimes would playfully hit him, tease him and how he would laugh about it every time, while everyone else around them was shocked by how she _dared_ to speak like that to her commander.

And she liked to think he would never allow anyone else to treat him like this. And she was mostly right.

She liked to think she was _special_.

That she was as special to him as he was to her.

_“We’ll get to the bottom of this. Together.”_

Why couldn’t he have simply lied to her once? Why couldn’t it have been just one big lie? Why did he have to lie every single day they spend together, pretend to like her, to care about her? For six years.

Why did he spend time with her outside of their training and missions? Why did he listen to her? Why would he return her banter? Why did he open the door every single time?

Why did he always offer his hand after he had knocked her down on the mat to help her get back up?

Her vision became blurry; her entire body hurt more than it ever had after a fight. She just wanted to destroy him. Destroy her. Destroy this godforsaken universe. She wondered if the pain would ever stop, if it would ever get any better than this. Fists glowing. Her entire body filled with energy, ready to be unleashed into the world.

_“Control it.”_

She hated him, hated this stupid order he’d give her every single time in training. And she hated how her own mind would repeat it to her over and over again – but she listened.

She let go, her energy calmed down. Anger got replaced with sadness.

_“I’m so proud of you.”_

_“I’m so proud of you.”_

_“I’m-“_

“Stop staring at me.”

Carol looked at Yon-Rogg who still hadn’t moved out of his chair. His eyes were closed making him appear asleep if it wasn’t for his incredibly annoyed voice.

“I just can’t get over how horrible you look. You’ve really let yourself go over the past years,” she replied, not looking away from him at all. Wondering if he had opened his eyes and saw her while she hasn’t been paying attention or if he just _knew_ she was standing there.

“So what you are implying is you that found me attractive before,” his voice was more amused than anything now which in turn made _her_ annoyed.

“Keep telling yourself that,” she hit his shoulder out of a habit, not hard, more like a friend would do, however he immediately flinched, suppressing a cry of pain.

“Sorry!” She didn’t mean to say it but she meant what she said.

“You weren’t sorry when you hit me before,” he was talking to distract himself from the burning pain in his upper arm. He couldn’t even remember when they’ve carved into his skin there but judging by how badly it still hurt, it couldn’t have been long ago. Not that Yon-Rogg wasn’t used to anguish, quite the opposite in fact, and if it was a normal cut he probably wouldn’t ever bother. However, his tormentors had always immersed the blades they used in some kind of hot fluid before they used them on him. He still couldn’t identify the liquid as he had never seen something that even began to resemble it; all he knew was that it caused a pain similar to singes and slowed down the healing process of the skin immensely. He had applied the ointment he found in the kit Carol had given him earlier but it probably took some kind of antivenin to stop this pain – if it was curable at all.

He reminded himself to stay calm, that pain was something in your head. He reminded himself to control it, his body. Not letting the aches control him. And most importantly, not letting her know how much he was actually in pain.

“Let me see,” her voice was firm, trying to hide the concern that he didn’t deserve at all.

“You only want me to take off my shirt.”

He always had told Vers that humor was a distraction - and it truly was.

Rolling her eyes she stepped closer, aiming to just _make_ him show her if he didn’t want to cooperate. He backed away as far as he could without falling out of the chair.

His voice was deep, warning her: “ _Stop._ ”

They had been here before. Years ago, when he came back from a mission while she had been waiting for his, the Starforce’s return. She knew he was in pain from the second she saw him. He had tried to hide it and most people probably really didn’t notice. But she knew his body, his movements. And she knew when something, no matter how small, had changed. Back then she had offered her help even if it was just to get professional help and he had dismissed her, ordering her to leave him alone and she had listened and did as he said. Not without complaining, of course, but he hadn’t been in the mood for banter and ignored her completely.

At this point she had realized that there would always be things Yon-Rogg would never share with anyone, not even her. And such moments were one of them. He had been fine again a few days later – or did a great job at pretending to be – but she still found herself holding back, not daring to even try to seriously hit him during their training.

 _“I know what you are doing. You need to stop feeling sorry for your opponent. Think, don’t feel. Your enemy will use that against you,”_ he had said before using her distracting to pin her down on the mat.

 _“You aren’t my enemy,”_ she replied, refusing to fight back.

How wrong she had been.

“Stop, _Carol_ ,” he repeated himself, adding her name to give the sentence more weight.

This time she didn’t listen.

After struggling with him for a minute, she managed to lift his shirt up against his will, trying to make him take it off completely so she could see the wound on his shoulder. He didn’t move his arms and therefore made the task impossible, however what she _could_ see when his stomach and part of his chest were exposed to her, had already been enough.

“What did they want from you…?” Her eyes wandered from one wound to another, not really expecting an answer, just mumbling something to herself in shock. She knew he was hurt but she hadn’t realized how bad it was. Had he been human he probably would be dead already, however the Kree body could thankfully take a lot more. He wasn’t dying or even close to death, she knew that. Yet she also knew he must be in immense agony.

She had almost said it, uttering his name, apologizing for having beaten him earlier but he didn’t deserve it. If he would have looked into her eyes, he could have heard it anyway.

“My number, probably.”

It was something Carol had said to him when she had been on Hala only for a few months. She went out that night and he didn’t think any of it but then the message came: She had been in a fight. He was shocked, rushing to her as he didn’t know how badly injured she was. Cursing at himself for letting her go alone while also telling himself he wasn’t really worried about her. That he only card about her powers. But when he arrived and she didn’t have a single scratch, while the four guys who harassed her were lying around her on the floor, thankfully just unconscious instead of dead (not that he cared about them, it simply made getting her out of the situation either). He had asked what they had wanted from her, which she returned with a shrug _“My number, probably.”_ He didn’t know what kind of number she meant and when he asked she was sure either. He figured it must have been some kind of Terran phrase still lingering in her subconscious.

He wondered if she now knew what it meant.

“You need to see a doctor,” she tried to pull his shirt further up to see the full extent of his injuries.

“Great plan. Call Ronan, he’ll send one,” he said defiantly, trying to pull his shirt down again.

“ _Yon._ ”

He held still. Not that he was giving in but something in her voice, in the way she had said his name, made him stop.

“What do you care?” It sounded less like a question and more like he tried to make her leave him alone but he was seriously wondering. Why would she care he was in pain? Or injured? He wasn’t her commander anymore. They weren’t even on the same side of the war.

When he still were, he had always found her concern for him endearing yet dangerous. On the battlefield there would be not time to feel sorry for him or anyone else, it would be best for her to not get distracted so she won’t follow her comrades’ fate. He always warned her about getting emotional; there was no time for that in war. _There's nothing more dangerous for a warrior than emotion_.

Hypocritically, after they had lost her on their mission to locate Soh-Larr, he couldn’t think of anything but her, desperate to know if she was still alive.

It didn’t distract him from their mission then, yet he was willing to drop everything to get her once she had managed to contact them.

“They look like burn wounds,” she observed, ignoring his question. Not out of disrespect – she just didn’t know why she cared either.

“Well, they aren’t.” Actually he wasn’t sure _what_ they were.

She finally let go of his shirt, walking over to the control system, seemingly searching for something in the database it offered her. And she seemed to have found it as she smiled, tapping on of the names on the holographic list.

“We’ll stop at the next planet whose medical industry is advanced enough to hopefully help you.”

Before she managed to change the destination in the navigation system, he had managed to stand up, holding her wrist to prevent her from typing.

“No, we won’t.”

She almost pushed him away, her free hand hovering over his chest, however remembering his injuries she stopped. He looked down at her hand and sighed: “I thought I’ve taught you better than that. Stop pitying your enemy.”

Carol knew what he was doing. They had spent more than enough time together for her to know when he’s trying to provoke her. Despite that knowledge she still had kept falling for it during their training sessions, however now she was much more in control.

Maybe he had taught her a lesson or two after all.

“I won’t die,” he insisted.

“I don’t know. I feel like you are on very thin ice around me.”

Instead of fighting him and therefore giving him the distraction from her plan he wanted, she let energy flow into her wrist, heating up until it would be too painful for him to hold on.

Yon-Rogg let go, automatically waving his hand a little to cool it, while she quickly made the needed adjustments to their route.

When she turned around to face him, she fully expected to stare into either anger or annoyance; however all she could see was amusement on his face. In fact, he was almost… smiling.

“What?” She frowned, completely baffled.

He broke into a smile, was even almost laughing, gently resting two fingers on her forehead.

“You finally used _this_ ,” his fingers wandered down, pointing at her hands. “Instead of _this_.”

She hated how he took pride in that yet she knew he wasn’t completely wrong. It _was_ something he had taught her.

“I’m so proud of you.”

He repeated, seemingly much more at ease despite not having gotten his way.

She didn’t like that smug expression on his face but all she could focus on were his words. Carol knew she was wrong, she _had_ to be. He was only proud of her progress as it strokes his own ego – no matter on whose side she was on. Or he was simply lying.

However, as she watched him sitting down again, accepting his fate, she couldn’t help but wonder if maybe, _maybe_ he actually meant it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I used to have other hobbies than writing this, thanks Captain Marvel.


	5. Her Friend

“ _That’s_ the planet you chose to get medical treatment for me?”

They had only been walking for about half an hour and Yon-Rogg had already complained several times about the current state of the environment, the villages in the distance and even the clothing of the civilians they passed. No matter how small and insignificant a detail in the landscape was – he’d find and insult it. Despite knowing he only kept complaining to distract himself from the pain, and most likely didn’t even mean half of what he said, the carping still began to really test Carol’s patience as they kept walking towards their destination.

Admittedly, the planet was no Hala or even Earth, though both had their hideous spots as well – one more than the other - but there wasn’t a wide range of planets to choose from, let alone galaxies. Especially considering they had to avoid the Kree Empire at all costs, which sadly narrowed down the assortment by a lot.

Judging by the houses they walked by and the extent of the city they were heading to, the inhabitants had been well off at some point in history. Wealth, which probably had come from the mining and export of commodities, now had to yield to poverty and depletion of natural resources.  
Before landing she had researched the planets history which had confirmed her suspicions. It hasn’t been an artless process that had become their ultimate fate; it was the invasion of a foreign authority followed by destruction, exploration and misery.

The proud nation that once dominated international markets, now only was a shadow of its former self.

“Is arrogance a trait all Kree are naturally born with or is it acquired by their upbringing?”

She genuinely wondered, fully aware that humans weren’t better by any means – they just didn’t have the technology to conquer other planets, let alone galaxies yet. But Yon-Rogg didn’t have to know that.

“I’m just questioning your judgement when it comes to infecundity,” he defended himself.

“I’m questioning my judgement when it comes to the people I save out of captivity.”

He gave her an almost offended glance before picking up the pace so he wouldn’t have to walk right next to her anymore – ignoring the immense and burning pain it caused him.

“I didn’t ask for any help.”

He really hadn’t. However, that didn’t make her query the decision any less.

“No, of course you didn’t. You’re way too proud for that.”

He was still walking ahead of her and she had no interest in walking faster to catch up to him again. She had seen how he slightly shifted more weight onto his right foot than on the left, how he seemed more strict than usual. Now that he was in front of her it was even more apparent. Still, she didn’t feel any compassion for him. He was putting himself through this and if he was willing to pay the price for walking at that speed then there was no need for any sympathy.

“ _I_ have something to be proud of at least,” he snapped in a tone she’d describe typical for Kree or at least typical for Kree Warriors as her interactions with the casual residents of Hala had been rather infrequent and always of a short nature.

She laughed outright.

“Lying to someone for six years to manipulate them _surely_ looks good on your résumé,” not that _this_ had been the worst thing he’s ever done but she didn’t feel like touching anything else at the moment - especially considering she didn’t even know where to begin.

He stopped walking: “I wasn’t talking about _that_ …”

She believed him but also wouldn’t go easy on him just because he was injured. Passing him, she flicked her index finger against his temple, figuring this would be a good way to hit him without actually hurting and injuring him any further.

He didn’t know what to say and Carol didn’t expect him to say anything at all.

“Maybe we should take you shopping,” changing the topic to get into a more serene mood, as she was tired of Yon’s complaining and just didn’t feel like arguing, she now walked ahead of him. However, judging by the sound of his footsteps behind her, he was quickly catching up again.

To her surprise he didn’t pass her but slowed down once he reached her, walking right next to her.

“Unless you find someone selling a Starforce uniform I’m not interested.”

The Supreme Intelligence had taken a lot from him as a punishment but to his surprise and relief he not only kept his rank of being a commander but also his position of being the leader of the Starforce. The Intelligence had been talking about not letting his talents go to waste and Yon-Rogg was aware he was only being used, that it was no sign of forgiveness or even pity, which felt like salvation. He neither wanted nor deserved any remission for his failures. Being taken advantage off had been his job for years; he was a soldier after all. And he was happy to fulfill his purpose for the good of all Kree.

His reputation with the people had taken a much greater damage though. Once celebrated as a hero by everyone, he had now become the laughing-stock to a lot of them – not all, thankfully, but enough for him to notice. The Supremor, who had originally brought it up to him, causing him to pay attention and therefore becoming aware of it, asked if he minded the increase of his status, to which he replied he was serving to protect his people _not_ for popularity. And while it was true, it still hurt his pride and ego. But it also made him more eager to prove himself again.

“Are you just so vein or is it nostalgia that prevents you from wearing other clothes for a short amount of time, _commander?_ ” She addressed him mockingly, smiling.

“Neither,” he insisted. “The Starforce uniform is equipped with some of the highest Kree technology, making it perfect for combat and simple military maneuvers. It functions under any gravitation, as well as in water and in any other area currently known, such as mountains, desserts and even space itself. It protects its wearer against a wide variety of adversarial weapons, including-“

Carol rolled her eyes: “You don’t need to sell me the damn thing, I know what it does.”

He raised an eyebrow, crossing his arms in skepticism.

“You sure?”

Confused by why he’d think she, a former member of the Starforce, wouldn’t have any knowledge about the advantages of the suit – especially considering she was wearing it right now in front of him – she gently pressed the back of her hand against his forehead.

“Is it fever? Are you hallucinating? It’s me, the person that kicked your ass a few years ago.”

He shoved her hand way: “I just wasn’t sure if you had _actually_ payed attention the first time I explained it to you - considering your bad record of listening to anyone.”

“Oh, I _always_ payed attention.”

Frowning, she gave him a look that said ‘bring it on’, similar to how she would have looked at him on the sparring mat – which admittedly usually resulted in her ending up on the ground. But this wasn’t a physical fight, it was a verbal one and she always had the upper hand there.

“There's nothing more _dangerous_ for a warrior than emotion. Humor is a _distraction_. And anger, _anger_ only serves the enemy.” Histrionically she mimicked his voice. “I have all of your stupid lectures memorized. It would be impossible not to considering you tried to teach me the same lesson every single day.”

“I wouldn’t have had to repeat myself constantly if you would have just listened _for once._ ”

“I did listen,” she shrugged. “I just didn’t care.”

They stared at each other like they were about to break into a fight for what felt like an eternity – but then they both laughed.

For a brief moment, it felt like they were back in the corridor that led to the training area, teasing each other, Yon occasionally throwing in a lecture still but never patronizing – at least back then it had felt like he genuinely wanted her to become better. She’d boast about how she’s going beat him to the point of her offering some stupid bet he’d always take, because he knew he’d win anyway and she knew he never made her actually pay her debts.

Looking at it now she was aware he had just been lying to her, that these moments weren’t as real, as authentic as she thought they were. Yet she still caught herself wanting to go back sometimes. Fighting crimes and saving the universe (or at least part of it) was what felt like her destiny, her purpose in life and she’d never want to do anything else but she missed having someone who cared about _her_. Not the ideology she represented.

She knew Yon-Rogg didn’t actually care about _her_ either but she liked to think that during those moments, even if he wasn’t aware of it, he actually did for a heartbeat.

They both pulled themselves together rather quickly, looking like two kids that were caught doing something wrong and swiftly continued walking as if nothing happened. They passed what could only be described as ruins however people were still using them as houses, no matter how much of the façade was missing. It broke her heart seeing parents feeding their children the little they had, trying to protect them from the cold temperatures of the coming night. She wanted nothing more than being able to help them. But she knew she couldn’t.

The first lesson she had learnt as (what some would call) a hero was of a brutal nature. Her powers seemed almost limitless, her volition to help was endless yet not even she could end or even prevent all the wars, all the crimes, all the acts of violence – the universe just was too big for that. And even if she would have just stayed on Earth, only feeling responsible for this single planet, she wouldn’t be able to do it. Too many things were happening and she had to accept that not only would she be too late for a lot of them but she also would never even be _aware_ of the vast majority of them.

Everything in her wanted to let food and shelter magically appear, shower them in wealth and end all the miseries at once – but that’s where her powers reached their limit.

“Come on.”

Yon-Rogg gently pressed his hand against her back to make her move forward as she had stopped walking, too overwhelmed by compassion. She had expected his voice to be dripping with annoyance or to even step so low to insult the basically homeless (which she knew he would never do but then again did she _actually_ know him?) yet he was calm and… empathic.

“There’s nothing you can do,” his tone was so soft, she nearly expected him to add _‘It’s not your fault’._ But he left it at that and she knew what he meant anyway.

She began moving again, slowly, feeling guilty for not staying and instead leaving them behind forever.

And suddenly she became incredibly angry.

“Don’t touch me.”

He still had his hand on her back to encourage her, to _comfort_ her, so he pulled it back quite baffled by the sudden emotional outburst, watching her walk faster.

They had left the ruins in the suburban area of the city behind now, reaching parts that must still belong to the lower class but at least they had functioning buildings. She headed through a small alley at a pace that made it really hard for him to follow. He wanted to tell her, tell her he was in pain, tell her that walking at that speed was not only a torture but also incredibly exhausting - but he didn’t. Instead he endured it. Like it was expected him.

The current moonless night and the lack of lighting in the streets made following her even harder and had there been more possible ways for her to take, he surely would have lost her, too proud to tell her to slow down. Maybe it wasn’t even just pride, maybe the fact that he was never allowed to ask for help, to show any sign of weakness, had now made him unable to do so completely.

She knew all of that. And she knew he was in pain, that he struggled to follow her and she knew he would never say something, which only made her angrier. His stupid elation and egoism was the root of all this squalor and here he was, running around as if he had the right for any pride, for any dignity.

Carol stopped so suddenly that had Yon-Rogg been any closer, he would have straight run into her.

“Are we there?” He asked, trying to hide how out of breath he was. Yon allowed himself to be hopeful, thinking he could finally rest, something he would never admit that to her, of course. He looked around, trying to find anything that would resemble a hospital or doctor’s office, unable to find even a door as they had stopped in the middle of a trail between two larger buildings whose entrances they had long passed.

When he looked at her again, questioning, he could see her fist flying towards him and instinctively braced himself for the impact that never came. Opening his eyes, he saw how her fist had stopped right in front of him and how she drew it back.

Her furious eyes met his, getting more heated by how innocent, how unaware he looked.

“What did I do?” With sincere confusion in his voice, he tried to figure out what had made her so angry with him but he couldn’t think of anything - _well_ , not anything he had done during the past few minutes.

“This!” She vaguely gestured behind him, making him turn around seeing absolutely nothing.

He debated between guessing what she meant hoping to calm her down and outright telling her she has to be more specific because he was already starting to get annoyed – slightly scared but mostly annoyed.

He decided on the latter.

“Vers, you’ve got to be a _bit_ more precise than that.”

Yon-Rogg immediately recognized his mistake, too late but he still did, expecting her to hit him for real now, but to his surprise she was too agitated to even notice.

“The ruins!”

“What?” He didn’t know what he had expected her to say to justify her anger with him but that certainly wasn’t it. “I have never been on this planet before.” He wanted to add that even if he had been, he wouldn’t just go around and destroy houses of civilians for fun but she had started laughing.

It wasn’t the kind of laugh he loved to hear from her, this one that terrified him.

“Who do you think is responsible for this? Who attacked them?”

“It certainly wasn’t _me_ ,” he lifted his hand, defending himself.

“The answer has a K in it,” she lashed out and he opened his mouth to reply but she was quicker. “And it’s _not_ the second letter.” He closed his mouth again.

“This dump of a planet doesn’t even have a defense system let alone a military force. _Why_ would we attack that? They aren’t a threat to peace.”

He asked in a tone that made it seem like she had just said the most stupid thing possible and it took every piece of self-control in her to not throw him into a wall. In fact, she didn’t even really know why she wasn’t simply doing that. Something held her back. Perhaps it was the slight bewilderment in his voice, or the innocence in his eyes, maybe it was a tiny bit of hope in her that he _really_ didn’t know, that he had only been a victim of the manipulation and propaganda as much as she had been. And maybe she only kept onto that hope to have an excuse not to murder him.

“ _You_ can explain that to me.”

“I can’t because we didn’t-“

“Ask anyone. They will all tell you who attacked them, who is responsible for this.”

“Even if they say it had been the Kree,” he began. “They were obviously just Skrulls that were just pretend-“

“I have never met Skrulls that can turn themselves into warheads.”

He held on, almost flinched as if she _had_ ended up punching him. He was quiet for a moment and just when Carol expected him to come up with some obscure way to blame the Skrull anyway, he asked: “Are you sure they were warheads?”  
Against her expectations he didn’t sound like he didn’t believe her or was accusing her of lying, he sounded confused and almost instable. 

“Just like it was for countless other planets in this solar system alone,” she was calmer now, the fact he wasn’t getting angry with her took the wind out of her sails.

He frowned when she asked him once again to explain why this happened: “I don’t know. I’m not- The Supremor surely had justified reasons that I’m simply unaware of.” He couldn’t remember any recent mission that involved this part of the galaxy and therefore assumed the attacks must have happened long before his time. After all, the war against the Skrulls had already lasted for centuries. And conflicts in general were as old as time. Maybe at one point the Skrull had invaded this planet. Maybe the government itself had attacked the Kree first, causing this reaction.

He knew there was a reason. There had to be. Kree don’t attack and even destroy if they are not given a necessity to act, if they don’t get threatened. He knew that because it’s been told to him all his life. He knew that because all of the missions he had been involved in were to stop the Skrull, to protect not only the Kree, though they were the highest priority, but other nations as well. He knew innocent people had to die in order to stop them, it’s war after all. Collateral damage is inevitable, no matter how much he wanted to avoid it.  He knew it eventually was the Skrull’s fault for having started this war, for refusing to surrender even when faced the destruction of their home planet and instead started to undermine other celestial bodies. He knew all of that. He knew.

Carol saw the tentativeness in his eyes, sparking this flicked of hope in her chest again and calming her down enough to realize they wouldn’t anywhere with this conversation, not now at least. And perhaps it was even better to make him think about it for some time. Without saying a word she continued walking, slower now to ensure he didn’t have trouble following her which he immediately did.

The house they stopped in front of was rather small and unremarkable which only caused him to be less trusting of this place and the doctor’s abilities. He had long accepted he wouldn’t get to enjoy the comfort of the highly advanced Kree medication but he still had expected something better than this. Then again, it was his own fault for still being naïve enough to believe that after having seen the state the city is in, he thought.

As Carol opened the door without knocking or doing anything of similar fashion, he asked: “Is that it?” Just to be sure.

“No, I just like breaking into random houses.”

He glared at her, annoyed by her sarcasm – though it also was one of the things he liked most about her, but that wasn’t the point. When he had taken her to Hala, he thought he’d never have to see her again, that the Supremor would get the core’s energy out of her. He couldn’t hide his surprise when it had told him she’ll become a member of the Starforce and would constantly be under his watch and his responsibility. Hiding it wouldn’t have worked anyway as the Intelligence could read his thoughts and feelings but he liked to pretend to be more in control than he actually was. He didn’t ask why, he just accepted his order but that didn’t mean he wasn’t annoyed. Not necessarily with the Supreme Intelligence but with himself for taking her with them.

He should have known he wouldn’t get rid of her that easily when he volunteered to share his blood with her but he was driven by duty at that moment and didn’t have the time to truly think about what he got himself into – especially since her surviving longer than maybe a day or two, until they could extract the core’s energy, wasn’t his plan at all.

Yon-Rogg didn’t care about Terrans and hated being compared to one due to the uniqueness of his skin color – as if the lack of height wasn’t enough already -therefore he didn’t care about Vers either. For about three days.

It was their first sparring session and even though he held back (knowing that the blood alone wouldn’t be enough to protect her if he’d seriously fight her), he still beat her every single time. Her movements were predictable, boring even, and even though she ended up on the mat after every attack she tried, she always stood up. Always said something witty about how this didn’t count. It was never true yet he caught himself enjoying the small conversations in between fights. Unlike the other warriors he trained, she never sucked up to him, never treated him like a high authority that needs to be pleased constantly. He knew he should discipline her, telling her she must not talk to him like that. But instead she admired her for it.

He spent all his life following orders, doing everything he’s been told and here she was, a Terran without any memory of her past, facing an opponent much stronger than her, who didn’t care about  the protocol. He knew that she’d get into trouble for that in the future, and she did - a lot - but whenever _he_ was the target of her small rebellion, he ended up supporting it by bantering back instead of scolding her.

He didn’t care about the looks they got from fellow warriors all the time, and as a commander he didn’t have to anyway. The Supreme Intelligence complimented him for treating her almost like a friend to gain her trust, for having come up with such a brilliant plan and Yon-Rogg never understood why as the Intelligence should clearly be aware that this wasn’t something he planned at all, but he still was flattered and proud he could satisfy the Supremor.

But right now, as the burning pain got worse and worse, he just wanted her to shut up and give him actual answers instead of wrapping them in humor.

They found themselves in a small room that was almost completely dark except for the line of light on the ground in front of them, faintly painting the picture of the bottom of a door, representing the entrance into the next chamber. Instead of going ahead like she had done with the first door, she now called out, informing whoever was in the next room that they were looking for medical help.

He could hear footsteps on the other side and even make out two boots suddenly blocking path of the light underneath the door. Instinctively, as if this was a mission and not a simple unscheduled doctor’s appointment, he wanted to tell Vers, _Carol_ to stay back, knowing fully well she could defend herself way better than he could.

The door swung open with so much energy, Yon-Rogg expected it to crush into the wall right next to the hinges.

Due to the lack of light it was hard to make out the features of who he assumed must be the doctor (as this place didn’t seem like it would have staff members) yet he was sure it had to be a Kree or Terran or someone of a similar race – though he didn’t like to compare Kree with Terrans but it was a fact that their phenotype could be quite similar.

The voice was deep which caused him to assume it was a male - not that it mattered but he liked to get an idea about who he was talking to.

“Who needs help?”

The question was spoken so emotionless that it almost didn’t sound like a question, rather like a bored statement. Yon-Rogg wanted to reply but he couldn’t. Something stopped him from speaking up, from _admitting_ he was the one who needed help. It was stupid, he knew that, it usually was something he took pride in but right now it was rather debilitating.

He could almost hear Carol rolling her eyes and in fact she was debating not speaking up at all to not make this so easy for him, but she also knew he would rather die here in this room out dehydration, or whatever would cause his demise first, than simply raising his hand.

“My friend here does.”

Yon-Rogg knew it was a term she used to simplify things as ‘my former commander who had kidnapped me from my home planet and lied to me for over six years about my identity and past, who I, after finding out and kicking his ass, send back to Hala in shame and then ended up freeing out of captivity after a mission had gone wrong years later’ didn’t quite roll of the tongue.

But he was still taken aback that she had called him her friend.


	6. The Plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you didn't notice, I changed the rating to M just to be safe as this chapter features violence (and an injection) – nothing too graphic, though, I just wanted to mention it in case anyone reading this gets affected by such things.

 “You are Kree, huh?”

The man in front of them just turned around, walking back into the room but didn't close the door which prompted Carol and Yon-Rogg to follow him without getting the actual permission to do so. There was a smell of disinfectant in the air, making him believe the man may actually know what he’s doing though he still not completely trusted him. But there were only a few people he trusted anyway.

Now in the light they could finally get a better look at the man and Yon proceeded to calm down a bit more. The doctor was obviously a Kree himself, a darker shade of blue adorning his skin. He was tall, not necessarily tall for a Kree but certainly taller than him and seemed to make enough money with his job as he was probably the first person they saw on this planet that looked well fed. And while he obviously wasn’t in the possession of the newest Kree technology, Yon-Rogg was still glad to have someone of a competent species in front of him.

“Yeah, we are,” Carol replied as she took a look around, uninvited, while the doctor started to scrutinize Yon with a hint of distrust on his face. However, he still gestured him to sit down on the examination chair and despite the distrust being mutual Yon-Rogg was still glad to finally be able to rest and release some of the wounds from pressure.

“Soldier, right?” The doctor began and Yon noticed how he used the singular, assuming only _he_ was a part of the military, not Carol. For a moment he debated with himself if he should lie but then came to the conclusion that would be futile so instead he just nodded.

“Thought so. I can recognize a soldier who’s in pain and pretends not to be,” the man explained without having been asked. “Had to see those way too often.”

Yon-Rogg deduced he had served as well, most likely as some kind of army doctor and wondered why he wasn’t doing that any more. Not that there was a lack of doctors in the Kree Empire, thankfully the duty driven race had enough of those, but it could never hurt to have more than necessary – at least judging by _his_ battle experience.

“I’m Kry-Torr, but everyone around here just calls me Kryp.”

They both wondered where the P came from but didn’t ask.

“I’m Car-Ol,” she introduced herself, making sure to let her name sound like two so she wouldn’t have to explain why she only had one even though she introduced themselves as Kree. “And the grumpy guy over there is-“

“Noh-Aar,” Yon-Rogg quickly interrupted her. The man was obviously familiar with the Kree, even Kree Warriors, and they didn’t know what his feelings towards them were though he had served in the past. He couldn’t be trusted with the information of his real name because, without any arrogance, Yon knew he was popular and well-known among the Kree, therefore the chances of him Kryp knowing who Yon-Rogg was were too high to dismiss them.

The man didn’t seem to suspect anything.

“Alright, show me. What’s the issue, Noh-Aar?” Kryp asked; coming closer to him as he picked up a pair of disposable gloves.

Yon hesitated, still not willing to admit to himself (and especially others) that he was in pain and needed help but then he carefully removed his shirt, presenting the full extent of his injuries. Carol fixated her eyes on his torso. She hadn’t seen all of the wounds before but the one she _had_ seen seemed to have gotten worse. It certainly was the right decision to come here. Yes, they lost time and she wanted to take the refugees to their new home as fast as possible but _they_ were save now. Her former commander wasn’t.

Kry-Torr frowned as he walked around the chair to see the wounds on Yon’s back as well.

“That was them, huh?” He carefully took a closer look at one of the worst looking lesions. Despite all his training, the patient still flinched slightly when Kryp laid a finger on the skin close to the wound.

Carol immediately understood who he was referring to but it took Yon a moment to understand he did _not_ magically know about his captors but was talking about the Kree. There was a small hint of mischief in her voice as she asked: “What makes you think so?”

“Two Kree in the middle of nowhere on a godforsaken planet, one of whom had military training? I know a renegade when I see one. And the Kree have never taken it lightly when one of them wanted to drop out,” Kry-Torr wasn’t looking up, still applying pressure on the cut cautiously. “Not to mention how our _good ol’_ Supremor thinks about this.”

Yon-Rogg didn’t like the sarcasm in his voice but what he was even more offended about the suggestion he was a renegade. _He_. Out of all people. He had served honorably since he had been old enough, climbed the ranks up faster than any Kree had before him and was the leader of the Starforce. _Never_ would he become a traitor.

But he also wasn’t stupid enough to correct Kryp.

“You are safe now, mate,” his tone was warm and friendly as he gently placed a hand on his uninjured shoulder. “I’m sorry for the horrors you had to endure.”

“Can you help him?” Carol wondered. She had carefully watched both of them – Yon to stop him before he’d do or say something he’d regret and the doctor to stop him in case he’d hurt Yon-Rogg. _Just_ because she still needed him for her plan, of course.

“I can give you the antidote which will stop the poison from continuing to hurt the nerve cells around your injuries. It also prevents it from hindering the natural healing process. The rest is your body’s job.” The doctor walked over to a small cabinet which was overflowing with small bottles that all seemed to be labeled and assorted properly.

Yon-Rogg was almost relieved to hear the doctor couldn’t heal all his lesions instantly – though he also hadn’t really expected anyone to be able to - and that it was up to himself, his body to do so. It made him feel less depended and more in control.

“How did you end up here on this _‘godforsaken planet’_?” It was a question that had occupied his mind since he had seen the doctor was a Kree. Hala wasn’t the only planet in the universe that was inhabited by them but usually Kree stayed on their home planet and _if_ they move they choose other planets within the Kree Empire but not such a place.

“I wanted to help.”

“And the Kree didn’t need your help anymore?” He asked skeptically.

“Ha!” Kryp laughed out loud. “These fuckers don’t deserve anyone’s help. And even if they did, my capabilities are much more needed here than on rich shitholes like Hala.”

For a moment Yon-Rogg had lost control of himself and glared at Kry-Torr angrily. He couldn’t believe a Kree would ever talk like that about their own race and capital. Yes, he knew traitors like Mar-Vell existed, but to defect to the enemy sounded a lot more comprehensible in a way than just packing your things and leaving everything behind to live a more or less normal life in a faraway solar system. Though the former was clearly _way_ worse than the later.

The glare, despite really short, didn’t go unnoticed by neither Kryp nor Carol and while she was mentally preparing herself to find a way out of there, the doctor just laughed.

“It’s a cliché but you can easily get a Kree out of the Empire but hardly the Empire out of the Kree. You’ll learn to let go of that, mate.”

The friendly tone and the usage of the word ‘mate’ only made Yon-Rogg more irritated. He wasn’t his friend. He would _never_ have any sort of positive feelings towards a traitor – no matter if he was working with the enemy not.  Except for Carol of course but she was… _special._

This time however he managed to keep his emotions in check and didn't do or say anything that would reveal his true feelings. He looked over to Carol whose eyes said _‘don’t you dare’_ and even if he _would_ have wanted to let his emotions out, he would have stopped seeing this.

Kry-Torr finally found the bottle he had been searching for, looking rather complacently like he’d just done something incredible. Carol leaned against the wall, watching him transfer the liquid into what was probably the Kree equivalent to a syringe. She wasn’t sure if she could trust him enough to give Yon-Rogg an injection but did she really have a choice?

“That’ll hurt a bit,” Kry-Torr soothed him before pressing the end of the tube into the crook of his elbow and Yon had almost laughed at him and said he wasn’t a child anymore and could very easily deal with a shot.

But then the pain hit.

He thought he had known pain when his tormentors would constantly tear open his older, already burning wounds with their poisoned blades; or when he was younger, a fresh soldier in his first battle, getting stepped and shot by two enemies, leaving him in the dirt to die; or when his mother – _no_ , he didn’t want to think about that. He had endured a lot of agony in his life; it was unavoidable in a war, when you were a Kree Warrior. Some distress was easier to bear than other but he had _always_ preserved, keeping as much of his dignity as possible.

However this was different.

Yon-Rogg couldn’t even think about hiding his pain, about keeping a straight face. He bend over, feeling like something was burning inside of his body; a flame that would destroy anything in its path. Clinging to the chair with his hands to just have _something_ to hold onto, breathing heavily, he couldn’t suppress a cry of pain. His vision got blurry as tears filled his eyes and he didn’t know if he was shocked more by that or the pain itself.

Carol, who had been standing across the room the entire time, immediately ran over to him, regretting her decision to trust Kry-Torr.

“What did you do to him?!” She grabbed the collar of his white coat, pulling his face almost into her glowing fist. Kryp, shortly startled by her powers, quickly held up his hands in a peaceful manner to appease her.

“It’s the antivenin. It’s the _only_ way to detoxify him. I swear,” the heat of her hand made him sweat. “I should have communicated that but it’s usually better to not let the patient know to avoid panic before the injection.”

She didn’t know if she should believe him or not but another cry from Yon-Rogg shifted her priorities from harming Kry-Torr to helping _him_.

“When does this stop?!” She let go of the doctor to move next to the man who now didn’t even seem to be her former commander anymore. She _knew_ Yon-Rogg. She _knew_ how good he was at hiding pain. How good he was at enduring it. And she didn’t even want to start imaging _how_ bad it must be if he reacted like that. “What can I do?!”

She suddenly felt helpless, even more than she had at the ruins. All the anger she had ever felt towards him was surely still inside of her - but all she could feel right now was affection and the need to protect him. And she felt guilt. Guilt for even brining him here, for being the root of this pain.

“Nothing. It’ll get better in a few minutes.”

Instinctively she place her hand onto his, feeling the tension in it as it held onto the chair like his life depended on it.

“ _Yon?_ Yon, can you hear me?”

He made a noise that sounded like more like a whimper but she interpreted it as a ‘yes’. Carefully she tried to loosen the fingers of his right hand and to her surprise he let her, giving her the opportunity to take his hand. She could feel the conflict between his urge to press back and his desire to not hurt her as she tenderly squeezed it to reassure him.

“Everything will be alright. I’m here.”

They had only held hands once before; it should feel wrong to her even more now than it did back then - yet it didn’t. Instead it seemed like the most natural thing – just as it had the first time.

When she had woken up in Hala, she immediately started to panic. She didn’t know any of the people around her, she didn’t know where she was and, most shockingly, she didn’t even know _who_ she was. Some kind of tube stuck in her arm and though she couldn’t remember anything, she _knew_ that could not mean something good. She wanted to flee despite having nowhere to go; was so scared and numbingly helpless when she tried to move but couldn’t. She didn’t know if she was dying, it certainly felt like it. _Everything_ just hurt so badly.

_“Vers.”_

She had no idea what that meant but she instantly tried to focus her eyes on the source of the sound, the man next to her. His face was harsh and farouche and certainly didn’t look like you could trust him but he was the only one who talked to her, who paid any kind of attention to her.

_“Where am I?”_

There were so many other questions on her mind but she figured if she just knew _where_ she was and _why_ she was here, maybe the rest would come back to her. But it didn’t.

_“You’re safe. Calm down, Vers.”_

_“What’s going on?”_

_“You were badly injured and need a blood transfusion.”_

His voice hasn’t been soft and calming, it was rather distant as if he didn’t want to talk to her at all. She looked down and saw the same tube she had in his arm as well. Her eyes wandered back, so tired, struggling not to fall asleep, to not pass out. She knew, thought she wasn’t safe.

_“I’m scared. So scared.”_

She didn’t mean to say that but she had so much trouble getting any clear thoughts. She was _so_ exhausted and fighting against it only made it worse. The man still looked at her but something in his eyes had changed. She could suddenly feel his hand on hers, holding it and when he started speaking again, his voice gentler, more reassuring than before, she somehow believed him.

_“Everything will be alright. I’m here.”_

Carol felt Yon-Rogg pressing his head against her arm as she was standing next to him and she automatically readjusted her pose so he could rest his forehead against her shoulder. He was crying, something she would have never thought she’d hear him do, and she carefully placed her free hand on the back of his head, repeating that he’ll be okay.

And thankfully the doctor was right.

After a few minutes, that honestly felt like an eternity, she could slowly feel how his hand started to relax. His wincing became more and more infrequent until it disappeared completely and when he lifted his head again, she knew the worst was over.

He was still breathing heavily - probably from the exhaustion and tension - but when she asked how he feels, he was at least strong enough to properly reply again.

“Never felt better.”

It sounded like sarcasm but it really wasn’t. Having experienced the past few minutes only made him more grateful when he _didn’t_ feel any pain at all. Not only the anguish of the antidote was gone but also the pain his wounds had caused him. When he straightened his back, he could still feel the injuries however they now were more uncomfortable than hurtful - he wasn’t sure if that was caused by the antivenin or the fact that now his body _truly_ knew what pain was, though.

He had let go of hand and now that he was able to actually think again, he started to feel disgusted with himself for showing how weak he was. For even crying in front of her. But before he could start to feel embarrassed, his thoughts were interrupted by Kry-Torr’s voice.

“ _Yon,_ eh?”

Carol’s stomach dropped.

“I knew that face seemed familiar. Would have never thought the _great_ Yon-Rogg would visit me one day,” he said it with the same irony in his voice as he had spoken about the Supreme Intelligence.

It took Yon a moment to realize in what situation they had gotten themselves into as he was still so exhausted, so tired. He didn’t understand what was happening until Carol suddenly stood in between him and Kryp.

“We _don’t_ want to hurt you,” she said, way calmer than he had expected.

“Well then don’t.”

The doctor stood up, an unreadable expression on his face as he took off the gloves and threw them into the destined bucket. Starting to walk to the other side of the room, even turning his back to Carol, he opened the door they had come through.

“I don’t want you here. _We_ don’t want you here. Go.”

Kry-Torr was calm yet had some kind of authority in his voice. Both Carol and Yon-Rogg realized he wasn’t a threat and probably more peaceful than any of them would have reacted if they were tricked like that. Though, to be fair, they hadn’t come here with the _intention_ of screwing anyone. It just _happened_.

Yon-Rogg pulled over his shirt and stood up, slowly, testing if his legs could carry him yet and thankfully they could – he would have died out of embarrassment if Carol had to carry him. She pulled some money out of her pocket, offering it to the doctor while asking how much he wants but he just laughed at her.

“I don’t want your filthy money.”

“She is Terran. And has nothing to do with the Kree Empire,” Yon explained, not wanting to take the man’s help and give nothing in return. Especially considering would he have known who he was, he wouldn’t have helped him to begin with.

“Guess she’s just accidentally hanging around with the leader of the Starforce.”

“Well, it actually _was_ an accident-“

The sound of a deafening explosion in the distance immediately stopped the conversation and when another two followed, someone burst into the room using the door behind them, causing both Carol and Yon-Rogg to be embattled – promptly relaxing when they saw it was just a little girl.

“Pa! Pa! There are huge black things in the sky!” She was completely distraught and before Yon had the chance to look at Carol to see if she thought the same, Kry-Torr suddenly grabbed him, pushing him into the wall. He was still weak from the injection and even though he had seen his hand coming had no chance to stop or dodge him.

He whimpered when his back hit the hard stone. It knocked the breath out him and made respiring even more complicated than it already was due to Kryp’s arm that was pressed against his throat.

“You piece of-“

Carol pulled him back forcefully though still careful to not seriously hurt him: “We have _nothing_ to do with this!”

As another impact followed, close enough for them to feel the vibration in the ground, Kry-Torr freed himself for her grip but didn’t go for Yon again: “Weird coincidence then, huh? _Fuck off_ , both of you.”  
He wasn’t angry anymore but the sound of sorrow in his voice was more unbearable for Yon than a simple punch could have ever been.

 _This_ hasn’t been his plan.

He _never_ meant for this to happen.

Without saying another word they both left Kryp’s house and ran. Running was way harder than he was used to but he somehow managed to keep up with Carol as they made their way back to the ship. The explosions had stopped now, still she wanted to just fly up there and beat Ronan’s ass but she knew she had to get _at least_ their ship to safety first if she already couldn’t save the planet.

Flying up there and destroying all three war ships would have been easy and a joy but the fact that they had stopped moving and sending warheads, made her worry they already made their way onto the ground.

“How the fuck did they find us?!” She wasn’t an idiot. This was no coincidence. No Kree would waste warheads on a basically dead planet if there wasn’t _something_ on it they wanted to destroy. She felt horrible. The inhabitants already had to suffer through so much and now they got attacked again because _she_ had stopped here. Everything was _her_ fault.

Yon-Rogg didn’t reply, too busy to keep up with her – but even if he had the chance to answer truthfully he wouldn’t have.

Even though they were running, the way back seemed so much longer, so much more insufferable. They had passed the ruins again – or rather what now was left of them.

It almost seemed surreal to see the craters and she wished it was. Those people had nothing and now they had even less than that, if some of them were actually still alive. They’d pay for it. _All of it._ Ronan, the Empire and this piece of shit technology that somehow managed to lead one of the most powerful forces in the entire universe.

As unreal as it felt for her, Yon-Rogg had an even harder time understanding what had happened. Or what was happening. His own voiced echoed through his head as if to make fun of him.

_"This dump of a planet doesn’t even have a defense system let alone a military force. Why would we attack that?”_

When they finally reached the ship, Carol was fuming, ready to kill whatever Kree would come even close to them.

She hadn’t expected the Kree to have already been here.

Carol had seen battlefields before, had seen corpses, even heavily disfigured ones – but nothing had prepared her for this. The very people she had been laughing with earlier, who she had told that they were _safe,_ that she’ll find a home for them. They were dead. Brutally murdered by Kree weaponries.

It was _her_ fault; all of this was her fault.

She would have broken down if she wasn’t so driven by wrath. She’d kill them. _All of them._ The tyranny of the Kree Empire had lasted long enough. She’ll put an end to this – forever.

Yon-Rogg didn’t know what to say; if there even was something he _could_ say. He wanted to comfort Carol, to tell her everything will be alright. But he knew that would be a lie. And it was finally time to stop lying to her for good.

“Carol, I-“

 _“Welcome home,”_ Ronan had suddenly turned up in front of them, disgustingly conceited as if he had just done anything honorable and not killed innocent people to get his revenge on someone else.

She wouldn’t even give him the chance to say more. Raising her first she was ready to fire, to place a photon blast right in the middle of his face, but suddenly she felt a sharp pain in her neck, almost like a sting.

And then her powers were gone.

She tried, _tried everything_ but there was nothing she could do anymore as several guards took her down, holding her steady against her will and making it impossible to move. “What did you do?!” She screamed at him almost in panic.

“Interesting, isn’t it? We’ve improved your original photon inhibitor, replacing the old defective one. _We_ gave you your powers. And now we _take_ them.” He was walking closer to her, about to touch her face when someone yelled at him.

“Don’t you _dare_ to touch her!”

Carol looked over to Yon-Rogg who was held back by six people and for a brief moment she even thought about how proud he must be that it takes six Kree Warriors to stop him, when it only took two for her. Now that her powers were gone she was pretty much exactly what she had told the Supreme Intelligence a long time. Just a human. Nothing more.

“Yon-Rogg,” Ronan stopped, looking over to him as if he hadn’t noticed before that he was in the room as well. “You did a _really_ good job; the Supremor will be pleased with you.”

“That wasn’t the plan, you asshole!” He was still struggling against the people who were holding him, refusing to make this easy for them.

“What wasn’t the plan? Tracking this ship? Following you to this place? I have a different memory of our conversation.”

Ronan opened his hand, letting a small holographic version of Yon-Rogg appear. It was a recording of one of their calls and Carol watched in terror as the conversation unfolded in front of her.

_“Ronan. We are heading for a different planet now - I’ll send you the coordinates. I know I said we should wait until we land at our original destination and I’ve gained her trust back but this would be a good opportunity to get her. Wait until you use the jump point, she has to be away from the ship first. Otherwise she – or we – will just escape easily.”_

_“Can’t she fly through space on her own anyway?”_

_“She’d never leave the refugees behind. She won’t run away like that. I know her.”_

_“Are the other passengers armed?”_

_“No, they aren’t a threat. It’ll be uncomplicated. They are just civilians.”_

She hoped all of this is just a manipulation; that the holograph, the call was made up. Something generated by the Supreme Intelligence to trick her into believing he had betrayed her like that. But when she looked over to Yon-Rogg who couldn’t look at her, she knew it was real.

And then her vision went black.


	7. The Hero

Yon-Rogg knew it was pointless, he knew there was nothing he could do. Trying to break free and running over to Carol would archive absolutely nothing. He’d waste his energy and it would only make Ronan, The Supremor even more wary of him. It would be totally irrational, impulsive behavior. He knew wouldn’t accomplish anything but making the situation worse for him.

But he did it anyway.

Somehow he could free himself, running over to her, almost stumbling. He wanted to reach her, to at least destroy the inhibitor. Maybe it was still a prototype and the only one they had. Maybe he could somehow still make this right. Maybe he could do something. _Anything._

He didn’t care what would happen to him.

He’s been a fool. His entire life.

He was disgusted with himself.

How had he been so oblivious? So susceptible to the lies and propaganda of the Kree Empire? How could he believe _‘For the good of all Kree’_ meant to protect them? To save them from the rising threat of the Skrull? Why didn’t he see what the Supreme Intelligence had actually been doing? That _‘the good’_ was the destruction of everyone who refused to bent, refused to endorse them. The good wasn’t the restoration of peace. It was the proliferation of war.

_Noble Warrior Heroes._

They weren’t noble. And _for sure_ no heroes. They were warriors. Simple as that.

She had been right. Carol had been right the entire time.

And even worse: _she had given him a chance._

Yet all he did was betraying her – for the good of all Kree.

Of course he hadn’t seen it as betrayal before. After all he was helping his own people and she wasn’t one of them. She was Terran. He was doing what he was trained to do. What he was taught to do. What he thought was right.

He wanted to be a hero again, so _desperately_ that he didn’t see he had been the villain all along.

“Carol!”

He screamed at her, hoping to somehow get through to her, to wake her up - but before he could reach her, he was held back again. It took several soldiers to subdue him, to make him stop running towards her.

Struggling against the men who held him, who had trouble putting up as much of a fight as he did, yet before he got out of their grip again, one of them landed a strike in his guts, making him gasp for air. Someone kicked into his joints, making fall onto his knees and before he could get himself together again he got hit into his face, followed by his head getting brutally yanked back, as one of them pulled his hair.

He looked directly into Ronan’s eyes.

“ _Commander_. What a presumptuous behavior.”

_“Fuck you.”_

Yon-Rogg tasted the blood in his mouth, spiting it at him, despite knowing fully well he’d never reach him but he wanted to make a point. He almost saw himself in Ronan, in those complacent eyes and that sickened him ever more.

He had been _so stupid._

“If you touch her, I’ll break every single bone in your pathetic body!” He couldn’t let anything happen to her. This was all his fault. _He_ should be the one suffering - not her. _He_ should be lying there, unconscious and completely helpless, depending on the mercy of their enemy.

“Big words for someone who can’t even stand up.”

Yon refused to accept his defeat, still trying to get out of their grip. He didn’t even know what he’d do then because there was nothing he _could_ do. He was outnumbered by far and while the soldiers on their own were no match to him - even a number of them at the same time would be no match for him - there were still too many. And even if he would reach Carol and destroy the inhibitor, she would still be knocked out, an easy target for the Kree.

Several times in his life he had wished _he_ had been the one who shot the drive. The one who absorbed the core’s energy. Just so he could beat Carol at her own game, to be as strong as she was, _stronger_ than she was.

Now he wished he had been the one just so he could save her.

Yon-Rogg had _always_ been the root of all evil. _He_ was the one who shot Mar-Vell, who made Carol shoot the drive, who decided to take Carol with her, who sold her to the Empire - _twice_. It was his fault she was in this situation. It was his fault that so many people had died.

He wished it was him. _His_ power they wanted. _His_ life they wanted to end.

But he wasn’t special.

No matter how much he had always liked to believe he was.

He wasn’t special and never would be.

He was no hero and never would be one.

The Kree had always told him to be careful, that Skrull can turn into anyone, that the monsters could already be in right front of you without your knowledge.

And in fact they always have been.

It just had taken him too long to realize.

If he had been alone, the only person in danger, he would have wanted to die. He _should_ die. He didn’t deserve to live, to live when so many people had died because of him. But he couldn’t let Carol become one of them. He’d do anything it takes to protect her. He had to _survive_ \- for her.

“I’d like to end this right now.”

He looked down at Yon - in more than the literal sense. His fingers wrapped around his throat, brutally suffocating him.

“But the Supremor still wants to talk to you.”

A blow straight into his face was enough to knock him out.

.

.

.

_“Yon-Rogg.”_

It was Carol’s voice- no, no it wasn’t.

He opened his eyes, the brightness blinding him for a moment, almost making him shield them with his hand. But he didn’t move.

Carol was standing in front of him, a few feet away, leaning coolly against a bed, her arms crossed and the typical smug smile on her lips. He recognized the bed. He had been sitting long enough next to it, holding Carol’s hand while his blood turned into hers. She was wearing her uniform now except the colors for this one hadn’t changed. It was proudly presenting the colors of the Kree.

And _that_ was the most revolting about this.

How _dared_ they make her seem like one of them?

“Let me out.”

He knew it would be inefficacious but he said it anyway. Just to do _something._

“You’ve done a great job, commander.” They started moving towards him, immediately triggering the urge in him to take a step back but he wouldn’t let them have this. “Rebuilding Vers’ trust to make her fulfill her purpose again.”

“Her name is _Carol,_ ” he growled.

 _“Hm?”_ The Supremor asked with a form of innocence in their voice as if they didn’t know what he was talking about before completely ignoring what he said. “Leading us here to find her - brilliant.”

He felt sick.

“ _Your plan_ had worked out wonderfully.”

He had taken the Intelligence’s compliments before despite knowing they were a lie. To push his ego. To feel important. But not this time.

“You know _exactly_ I didn’t want this,” he snapped. “I didn’t mean for innocent people to die.”

“Casualties cannot be avoided in a war,” they quickly stated factually.

“They were unarmed, harmless civilians!” He really tried to stay calm to not let the Supremor feed themselves with his anger, his weakness. To not let them know _how much_ he was in pain. Though he knew he couldn’t hide it, that they would see right through him. “They weren’t even Skrull!”

“ _Everyone_ who isn’t a Kree is the enemy,” they had stopped right in front of him, staring into his face and he still refused to move. “ _No one_ can be trusted.”

“There were children!”

“So?” Their voice was derisive, so much crueler than Carol had ever sounded – no matter how angry she had gotten. “Since when are children your concern?”

Yon-Rogg suddenly heard his own voice behind him. Turning around he saw himself, the Starforce, captivating Skrull civilians on Mar-Vell’s ship. He looked at Talos begging them to let them go and only take him. He heard himself order for them to be shot into space. Yon was aware that this was just a reproduction of the past, that it wouldn’t change anything, but he almost ran over to his stupid face and punched himself.

Of course he never _wanted_ to harm children, or even normal civilians for that matter, but killing them as well had always been a necessary evil to protect the Kree. He never took any pride in that and admittedly it often woke him up during the night. But it had to be done. The children would only turn into terrorists like their parents once they grew up. It’s what he’s been told, it’s what he repeated to himself. _For the good of all Kree._

He hadn’t realized their _own_ children were the ones getting trained to become murderers.

 _How_ had he been so blind?

“You know the Skrull are our enemies, Yon-Rogg,” they continued, daring to lay an arm around his shoulders in a friendly matter as if to reassure him that what he had done was right. “Their ability makes them dangerous and unpredictable. They can’t be trusted.”

“Really?” He almost laughed, pushing the arm away from him.  “Because the only one I see changing its form to appear as someone else and manipulate others is _you._ ”

The Supremor shook their head as if they were talking to a stubborn child that was acting out – and in fact that's what he was to them. The intelligence even went so far to sigh and lower their head.

“Do I need to remind you _why_ you joined the Kree Army?”

“No,” he didn’t hesitate with his reply and really wished he had meant to shut them up. But it was a plea. He didn’t want to think of it, let alone _see_ it. He didn’t need a reminder.

But of course it wasn’t an actual question.

He suddenly fell into a fathomless abyss of memories that he had repressed – or _tried_ to repress. Everything in him hurt. It was even worse than the pain he felt from the injection. _So much worse._ He didn’t want to see it. He _must not_ see it.

_A little boy was sitting on the floor, lost in his own fantasy. He imitated flying motions with his right hand, simulating the noises he imagined the original of the little spacecraft he was playing with would make._

_He was careless, without any worry in the world. Innocent. Safe at the home he shared with his small family of four. An older brother, while often teasing him, still always protective. A strict yet caring father, a military commander, wanting his sons to succeed in life. And a mother. A loving mother who would do anything for her children. He was loved and loved in return._

_A sudden knock on the door attracted his attention, causing him to look up from the city of toy blocks he had built._

_“Yon, sweetie?”_

_The boy dropped his small spaceship, almost jumping up to run to the door as fast as his little legs could carry him. “Mum! You’re back!”_

_He was just tall enough to reach the button, an accomplishment he was really proud of, opening the entrance to his mother who he welcomed with a big smile on his face. He hugged her, so happy to have her back as if ages had passed and not just a couple of hours._

_As she stepped in, the child looked at her expectantly: “What did you get me!”_

_Today was a very special day. His birthday. And even though he only had four birthdays before this, most of which he couldn’t remember, he knew he would get a present. If not more. His mother had even announced it as she left to go to work early in the morning, when he was still too tired to really listen to her. But now it was noon and his actual birthday was about to start._

_His father, working in the room next to them, had told him they’d only need to wait for her to get back - and now she finally had._

_“Shhh, Yon. I don’t want to ruin the surprise,” she smiled, gently placing her hand on his head, running her fingers through his hair._

_The little boy took her hand, dragging her over to the small blanket he was sitting on before._

_“Look, I made the city bigger!” He explained, expecting to get praised for having continued the work he and his mum had started the afternoon before. “I’m the hero protecting the people!” He grinned, picking up the ship and showing it to her. “With this!”_

_He let go of her hand, ran around the toys and pointed at the biggest house he had built: “That’s yours! So I’m protecting you too!”_

_Being a hero had always been his wish. Protecting the people he loved, or everyone, really. He didn’t know about the war or about the Skrull. He had been told stories about them by the elders but he hadn’t understood them yet._

_That was about to change._

_“Yon!”_

_He had dropped his ship in shock as he looked over to the door where his mother was standing, holding a huge present in her hands, staring at him in terror as his eyes wandered back to his mother who was standing in front of him._

_The women at the door ran towards them, pleading and before this little boy even had chance to begin to apprehend what was happening, she screamed. Collapsing on the floor, a lake of blue spreading around her lifeless body. The wrapped box lying next to her, its paper lowly soaking the blood in._

_He was being lifted up, a hand on his throat. A hand so familiar, so warm and so soft, yet deadly. His hands automatically started to fight against it, struggling to help him breathe again. His eyes met the eyes of his mother. She wasn’t smiling anymore. She didn’t love him anymore. The warm, golden eyes that mirrored his, that he had loved so much, now were cold and filled with an emotion he had yet to understand and would later recognize as bloodlust._

_The child didn’t know about death but he felt like he was dying._

_He looked at the woman, his mother, in fear, seeing no sign of the love he was so used to, that he thought would never end. She held something against his head, something he had only known as a plaything that he’d give his toy soldiers to defend the toy city from his toy monsters._

_Suddenly he fell onto the ground, inhaling deeply, his lungs so desperate for air. His mother slumping in front of him, a second time, right next to where she was still lying. A burning and fuming hole in her back. He watched his mother turn into a monster, while his other mother had stayed the same._

_And when his father ran over to him, the boy was crying._

And so was Yon-Rogg.

“The Skrull have always been our enemies,” it wasn’t Carol’s voice anymore, it was his mother, speaking to him in the tone she used when reading bedtime stories about the great heroes. The heroes that he wanted to be like and that she was sure of he’d be one day. She knew he would spend his life protecting the weak and defenseless. Be true hero.

He couldn’t lift his head; he had never been able to.

Through his tears he recognized he was wearing the Kree uniform, _his_ uniform.

“They are evil. Look at what they did to me,” she- they gently touched his chin, lifting his head for him. “Look at what they did to _you._ ”

He was still avoiding her eyes, too afraid of what he could see in them.

“You can trust _no one._ ”

The Supreme Intelligence suddenly let go of him, their hand guiding his eyes to the little boy, grinning while handing him his toy ship: _“I’m the hero protecting the people!”_

Yon-Rogg fell onto his knees, looking at himself, at the smile on his face he hadn’t seen since that day. And he would probably never see again.

“Vers had fraternized herself with the enemy. The monsters that killed me.”

“ _I’m protecting you too!”_

“You couldn’t protect me back then. But _now_ you can.”

The boy vanished and Yon-Rogg was left staring at the hollow space in front of him. The emptiness he had found in his heart since that day, that he never managed to fill, that maybe he didn’t even _want_ to fill, suddenly was been gone. _Replaced_. He had been helpless that day. In a way, had even felt helpless all his life. He couldn’t keep his promise of protecting her and it had been haunting him forever, had made him numb and rudderless. But now he knew what to do.

“She’s too dangerous, too uncontrollable to be let alive. We need to stop her. _You_ need to stop her.”

He stood up, wiping the tears away.

“You can be _the hero_ you were always meant to be.”

He looked up, looked into his mother’s face, her eyes.

“I will, mum. _I promise_.”

She was gone. And so was the simulation.

The wires that had connected him slowly withdrew. Setting him free. Ronan was standing in front of him, smiling - it was a fake smile but still - as he handed Yon-Rogg a knife, stepping out of the way to open the path to Carol.

She had regained consciousness, kneeling on the ground, her hands tied in front of her. Staring at him in disgust, in anger, in fear for her life as he slowly walked towards her.

Yon-Rogg knew he had to kill Carol. She was a hazard for the Kree Empire, trying to make her switch sides again was not only pointless but also perilous. For the good of all Kree her life had to end. And _he_ had to be the one to do it. He had created her, had brought her to Hala. He had caused all the trouble the Kree had with her.

It was his fault.

And now he could make it up again.

He finally had the chance to do what he should have done much earlier. What would have saved a lot of lives.

He crouched in front of her, his face emotionless. For a moment Carol wanted to flinch, to scream at him, to somehow make him stop. But she knew there was nothing she could say. Nothing she could do.

He had made his decision. They both knew it.

His hand came closer, slightly pressing the blade against her skin.

Yon-Rogg knew this was it. _His_ moment.

He had never believed in any of the afterlives he had heard and read about. That there was a God, or even more than one. That there was a heaven where all our loved ones go. But he believed in hell, as he had seen it. Back then. On his birthday.

He had lost his mother. He knew she was gone forever and that there was nothing he could do to bring her back, to change what has happened. But he could change the future, create a world in which no child will have to see the horrors he had to endure. In which they will be safe from the monsters.

And maybe he was wrong and there was an afterlife, a heaven. In that case he hoped his mother was looking down on him right now. And was proud of her little boy, of the man he had become.

He’d finally be the hero his mother always wanted him to be.

The hero _he_ always wanted to be.

He moved the blade forward forcefully to separate the photon inhibitor from Carol’s skin and completely destroy it in the process.


	8. Your Life For Mine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually didn't plan to start writing this until the weekend but then the "Captain Marvel - The Official Move Special" book arrived that I had preordered; and with Jude confirming Yon-Rogg genuinely likes Carol for who she is as a person ("They have a tight bond, but Vers’ humanity still comes out, and I think that is hugely attractive to Yon-Rogg. I think he finds her irresistible, and it’s her human elements that he really warms to.") and Gemma confirming that Carol is his fave ("And until Vers signed up with the team she was the star. She was Yon-Rogg’s favorite, so there’s a little bit of playful rivalry when Vers arrives on the scene."), I just had to write it now. 
> 
> I already knew it since it's obvious in the film but I'm still glad Yon-Rogg really having feelings for Carol and not just having pretended to be her friend is canon. Bless.

_“She’s dying.”_

_Yon-Rogg looked at the fragile body in front of him, watching the occasional sparks that would leave her pale skin. It was almost beautiful to watch, like a comet that was about to destroy whatever was in its path. He had brought her all the way to Hala, had done the best he could to keep her alive. And now she was virtually dead. Yes, he knew she had volitionally signed her death sentence when she decided to shoot the drive – but still. It didn’t feel right._

_“Is there nothing you can do?”_

_“Nothing except for extracting the core’s energy and store it separately. We will save the core, Commander. Your endeavors won’t go to waste.”_

_It was unfair. Her body had survived the impact, had survived in the small bed with the limited medical assistant he could offer – and now that safety, even recovery was so close it would just give up on her? She deserved better._

_He didn’t know what Mar-Vell had told her about the core or the Kree or the war. Knowing her she probably had just taken the Terran with her without explaining anything. While brilliant, Mar-Vell was more of a doer. Taking the time to come up with a plan and allow for any possible difficulties had never been her strong suit._

_“Her Terran body cannot withstand the photon energy any longer.”_

_She had fought bravely, he thought. Obviously scared of him, of the situation, she still had tried to stop him and was willing to die for what she thought was right. Nothing else had mattered to her. She didn’t run, she didn’t bent. Giving up had never been an option even though she knew she was completely forlorn._

_Her body may be the one of a Terran but she had the heart of a Kree._

_“Could a Kree survive it?”_

_“The Kree’s physiology is by far superior to the one of a Terran, so probably yes. However, transferring the energy to another Kree would be a waste of time if we could just store it elsewhere, Commander.”_

_She deserved better than this. So much better._

_“Take my blood.”_

_“Commander?”_

_“Make her Kree.”_

_“Commander, with all due respect, she’s just a Terran. I don’t see why-“_

_“That’s an order.”_

_He wouldn’t give up on her when no one else was willing to fight for her, not even her own body. He had been the one who got her into this situation - well, he and Mar-Vell - she was his responsibility. He would do anything it takes to save her. To protect her._

_“Don’t die on me, Vers. Don’t die. “_

She knew she was still alive when she felt the pain pulsating in her head. An excruciating pain telling her to stay still, to just fall back into the sweet embrace of unconsciousness – but she wouldn’t give in. She _had_ to get up; lives were at stake, her own life even. Carol tried opening her eyes slightly to get a picture of her surroundings without anyone else noticing, but the sudden overwhelming brightness made the headache even worse. It took an enormous effort to not move, to not turn her head away. When her eyes finally adjusted to the light, she started to search the room carefully.

To her disappointment, Carol could see nothing but the dirty ground of her own ship and a lot of Kree boots. She was completely surrounded. They haven’t just thrown her into a cell; she was still in the thick of it. Slightly moving her arms and legs she realized she was fettered and no matter how she twisted her hand, she couldn’t get out of it. The manacles were relentless, not allowing any kind of leeway. Out of a habit she tried burning the manacles but it had no result.

Then she remembered.

Her powers were gone.

Carol still felt puncture and heat of the inhibitor on her neck, reminding her of how she had woken up like this before, years ago when she had just arrived on Hala. Just like now she had been all alone, an alien on a foreign planet – something she didn’t knew at that time but she still had always felt it. However, back then she hadn’t been in any danger and in fact had even felt _safe_. Because she wasn’t _actually_ alone. Yon-Rogg was there, right next to her.

_Yon-Rogg._

It all came back to her now. This disgusting traitor. Where was he? She wanted to get up to properly look for him, maybe even find a way to strangle him with her fetters. This piece of shit. How could he do this? How could he just sell an entire planet’s fate without any remorse? How could he not care about the consequences of his actions? How could he do this to all those innocent people? How could he do this _to her?_

“She’s awake.”

Suddenly getting jerked upwards made the throbbing pain in her skull almost unbearable. Her vision needed a moment to become clear again and when it finally did she stared directly into Ronan’s face. She almost wished it had stayed blurry.

She was kneeling in front of him now and though she had no control, no power anymore, she would refuse to bent; she wouldn’t let him let him kill her without putting up a fight.

But to her surprise he didn’t do anything.

Apparently without her powers she wasn’t even worth his time anymore.

Then she spotted him. Yon-Rogg. He was kneeling in a similar fashion, attached to the Supreme Intelligence. She didn’t understand why he wasn’t simply standing until her attention drifted to the warriors surrounding him. No, not warriors. _Guards_. Seemingly ready to kill Yon-Rogg as soon as they would get the order.

She frowned. What had he done? Had they betrayed him? Did the Supreme Intelligence decide it won’t need him anymore now that he had brought her to it? The thought nearly made her laugh. It truly would be a welcome irony if after all Yon-Rogg had done for them, they’d end up abusing his trust like that. She certainly wouldn’t put it past neither the Kree nor the Supremor.

And after all it’s what he deserved.

Her eyes wandered back to him, watching a single tear roll down his cheek.

What were they talking about? He surely wouldn’t start crying for getting betrayed like this. He had more pride than that. In fact, she couldn’t think of anything that would make him cry in front of the Intelligence. He’d rather die than showing so much weakness. She had no doubt it knew _how_ vulnerable Yon-Rogg was and how to trigger exactly the kind of behavior it wanted – at least it had always succeeded with that in their conversations – but Carol knew he still had too much control of himself to simply start crying.

She flinched slightly when he suddenly opened his eyes as the wires withdrew themselves from his body.

Carol carefully watched the guards when Yon-Rogg stood up but they didn’t move. She almost was glad about this – _she_ wanted to be the one to kill him. She _deserved_ to be the one. However, seeing him take a knife from Ronan and walking towards her made her realize it would be the other way around.

Had he cried because the Intelligence had told him to kill her?

No, that would be incredibly _pathetic._

Even for him.

Her eyes caught his and she was nearly shocked to see nothing in them. No emotion. No remorse. No anger. No happiness. _Nothing._ He truly was the master of controlling himself. Except for when it came to the urge of betraying others apparently.

He crouched, slowly pressing the blade against her skin.

She wanted to scream.

Not to make him stop, to spare her life. But because she was _so angry_. She knew it had been stupid of her to trust him, to take him with her in the first place. That it was her own fault. He had been lying to her for six year before, what on Earth had made her think he won’t lie now?

Maybe Yon-Rogg had been right.

Maybe there really was nothing more dangerous than emotions. Or feelings rather.

Maybe for once she should have listened to him.

Carol refused to look away, staring into his seemingly lifeless eyes. It was almost ironical, really. _He_ had been the one who saved her life, who stopped her demise. She knew she wouldn’t have survived the core without _his_ blood. And to this day she still didn’t understand _why_ he had done it.

During her first year she had assumed it was an order from the Intelligence but when one day she had been brave enough to bring it up to it, it denied any involvement in the matter, taking absolutely no credit for his heroic deed.

_“He had acted on his own,” the Supremor had told her, smiling gently. “And I’m glad for it. Without him you wouldn’t be here, Vers.”_

From her second year on she had assumed he had saved her because he simply was a hero. Because he actually cared about others, cared about her. Because he _liked_ her.

After the sixth year she had learnt that all of this was a lie.

But even if everything, every moment, every little exchange between them had been just been that, a lie, he had _still_ saved her life. This was the reason she didn’t kill him, why she wouldn’t harm him any further when he was sitting on the ground, back pressed against the rock, looking up to her. She just couldn’t kill him. His life for hers. Her life for his. By sparing his life they were even and she no longer owed him anything, she told herself. It was just that, an equation.

Now, however, _he_ was the one looking down to her, _he_ would be the one who’d take her life. Maybe he even thought it was his right to do so after he had been brought her back to life in the first place.

_“You have his blood, Vers. He feels responsible for you. You can trust him.”_

She closed her eyes as she felt him moving the knife.

_“He would never hurt you.”_

The sudden rush of energy running through her veins was almost more shocking than what she imagined dying to feel like. Her powers had returned to her, free again. Free from the strain of the inhibitor, the pressure it had put on her body.

 _He_ had freed her from it.

She had gotten it all wrong. They weren’t betraying him – _he_ was betraying _them_.

But there was no time to think about this now. Her fetters, never meant to withstand the impact of photon, broke as she stood up, her enemies too in shock to do the first move. She wanted to aim for Ronan, to finally do what she should have done a long time ago, but as some Kree tried to come for Yon-Rogg to avenge his betrayal of the entire Empire, she had to take care of them first. Yon-Rogg’s life was hers to end and no one else’s. She made her way to the exit of the ship, killing anyone who dared get in her way, who was foolish enough to think they could stop her even for a second. No Kree Warrior, no matter their rank, had the slightest chance against her. And most of them had realized that early on.

Along with Ronan they had fled – or strategically retreated as they would call it - the ship, leaving only a few unfortunate souls behind that were brave (or stupid?) enough to attack her. After easily getting rid of the last the wall of warriors with one simple photo blast, she flew up to follow Ronan, to finally put an end to this. She had reached the three ships before they got to the jump point and easily took out two of them in one go. This time she would show no mercy. She would destroy _all_ of them – until the last Kree had died. There were no warnings anymore. Only _retribution_.

She distantly heard Yon-Rogg’s voice in her head warning her about not controlling herself, about letting anger guide her – but, _god,_ did it feel good to just let it all out. All the rage, the hatred of what they had done. The anger about herself for having trusted Yon-Rogg, for having come here in the first place, needlessly risking other people’s lives. The hate for all the lies the Kree Empire had told her, for all the manipulation, for all the innocent lives they had taken. For the Skrull, for the refugees, for every single victim of theirs. For letting Ronan live in the first place, for not having demolished Hala yet.

The explosions of the ships around her only made her feel more alive. It was the sounded of relief, a sign she had at least stopped a few of them. _For good_.

With two taken out, only one ship was left – Ronan’s. However, even though she had tried her best, worked efficiently and quick, they had still made it to the jump point before Carol could reach them. It left a bad taste in her mouth. But she’d get them too one day, she promised herself - especially Ronan.

And for now she had another Kree to take care of.

When she landed back on the ground, Yon-Rogg was already waiting for her like she had expected him to. He would never run – or _strategically retreat_ – at least not if only _his_ life was in danger. There had been missions he deliberately canceled when he considered the risks as too high for his team, taking full responsibility in front of the Supremor for his decision. Carol never knew if it had appreciated Yon-Rogg’s foresight, his refusal to use the Starforce members as cannon fodder. Knowing how little the lives of others meant to it though, it probably wasn’t _too_ thrilled about the behavior of its favorite soldier.

He had the same emotionless, stupid expression on his face as before, when he had almost killed her, and that alone would be a good enough for her to murder him right on the spot. Yon just stood there, no sign of trying to defend himself, holding his ground. And when he finally opened his mouth, Carol had expected to hear his excuses.

“ _I’m so proud of you,_ ” he said instead. Emotionally even, _too_ emotionally for him.

And this time she actually believed him.

Yon-Rogg fell onto his knees, smiling suddenly. He knew he had done the right thing. Carol was their only hope to stop the Kree. And they _needed_ to be stopped, he knew that now. They would pay for their crimes, just as he would for his.

She started walking slowly towards him, her right fist surrounded by the very same photon sparks he had seen on Hala when she was on the edge of dying, weakened by the core. Now, however, the glow was no sign of weakness, it was pure empowerment. She had come so far, he thought. Or did she?

_"Pararescue's on the way. You have two minutes until you're surrounded."_

No, she had _always_ been this strong woman. With or without the core’s energy. It has nothing to do with her strength; it just helps her live out her true potential. The potential that had always been in her. Back then he had considered her to have the heart of a Kree but now he realized he was mistaken. Her _Terran_ heart had made her this strong.

And it had always been her Terran heart that he admired the most about her.

He had always told her to keep her emotions in check, to not give into them, but it was this wild and unpredictable side of her that he had grown to like. She had been different and he admired her for it. It’s why he never got tired of teaching her the same lesson over and over again, why he never got angry with her for not following his advices or even orders. He genuinely liked her, the person she had been. He _always_ had. And he wanted her to become better, to beat him in combat one day, to become the person he knew she _could_ be. He never wanted her to change; he wanted her to become who she already was deep inside of her.

It just had taken him until now to realize this person had always been Terran.

Still, he was proud of the path she had taken, her development. She had come a long way from the insecure, weak trainee on the training mat, struggling to land a hit to the confident and powerful warrior.

A noble warrior hero.

 _She_ actually was one.

Carol had reached him now. He looked up to her, in several ways, as she raised her fist, ready to shoot, to discharge all the energy stored inside of it.

He knew he deserved punishment – not only for his betrayal but for everything he had ever done. Yes, he didn’t know about the Intelligence’s true motives, about the actual cause of the war. He had only done what he had been told was right his entire life. The Skrull had always been the bad guys, there never had been anything that made him believe otherwise - and even now, despite everything he knew, he still didn’t trust them.

But once Carol had been fighting for them, he maybe should have started to do so. To at least listen to her.

Now it didn’t matter anymore.

He closed his eyes as her fist came for him, ready to embrace death. He hadn’t imagined dying like this but it felt right to him. Out of all people in the universe, _she_ should be the only killing him. It’s what he deserved and most importantly it’s what she deserved. And she would finally-

 _“Ouch,”_ his eyes snapped open as her hand had stopped right before his forehead, snipping a single finger against it which sent a small, harmless shockwave through his body.

He looked at her face, searching for an explanation and while her expression was still filled with anger, her eyes were surprisingly… _loving_. Similar to how they looked at him on Hala when they had just shared a joke, teasing each other on the sparring mat, when she would convince him to visit places he actually didn’t want to go to, when she woke him up in the middle of the night, searching for his comfort. Back when they were still friends.

“I hope you were as anxious as I was, _you ass._ ”

He didn’t understand her.

“Why…?”

Carol sighed almost in frustration as she looked away from him. Frustration about herself, him, their situation. Her eyes landed on her ship, wondering if it could still get her – _them_ – from this planet. She wondered where they would go, where they _could_ go.

_She had thought about what the Intelligence had told her regarding Yon-Rogg for a moment until she looked at the woman in front of her, nodding eagerly._

_“I understand, Supremor.”_

She offered him her hand which he hesitantly took, letting her lift him up.

_“I will always protect him in return.”_

“Why?” He repeated. “Why won’t you just kill me?”

She almost smiled at him smugly, happy about his puzzled face, as she shoved him towards the ship, almost making him stumble by the sheer force she used.

“I won’t tell you.”

“But-“

“ _That’s_ your punishment.”

He went very still, confused by her actions. But then again, when has she ever been predictable?

Before they could leave the planet, however, there was still one thing to do - the hardest part of any way, burying the bodies. Yon-Rogg hadn’t said a single word while helping her carry them out of the ship to a nearby tree. She felt so sorry that she couldn’t offer them a better grave, a place they actually deserved, as they dug the holes. For a while you could hear nothing but the sound of the night and the shovels hitting the ground.

He wanted to say something, to explain himself, to apologize – not only to her but to them as well. There was nothing he could do or say to ever make it up to them, to this planet, to everyone he’s ever hurt – especially Carol. He knew that. And it was eating him alive.

“Carol, I-“

“I know.”

“No, please let me say it. _Don’t_ let me take the easy way out of this.”

She didn’t reply.

“I’m so sorry. _So_ incredibly sorry. I know these words don’t mean anything, they can’t undo all the harm I’ve done, all the pain I caused. I… I didn’t know. Which is a poor excuse. It’s no excuse at all. There _is_ no excuse.” He almost whispered, hitting the ground harder. “I should have noticed something, _anything_. I should have realized what the Supreme Intelligence was doing – _is_ doing. All my life I thought we were the _heroes._ But we didn’t save lives – except for our own maybe. We only destroy. I can’t believe I’ve been so fucking stupid.”

He clenched his fist, anger rising in him. He wasn’t even sure _who_ he was angry with. The Kree? The Supreme Intelligence? Himself? Mostly himself probably.

“I fell for all this bullshit, all those lies. The- The _propaganda_. I’m so sorry for having brought you into this. For having taken you to Hala, for betraying you – so many times. I’m a piece of shit. I don’t deserve any mercy or pity even. I deserve to die. All those people have died because of _me_. It’s not… fair. I should take their place. It’s an insult to them that I’m still alive. I never meant for this to happen, I swear. I never thought the Kree would still attack them after I specifically told them the passengers where harmless civilians. I can’t believe I was so fucking _naïve_. I just-“

“Are you gonna finish your dramatic speech any time soon or are we gonna be stuck here for a while? Because if so we should get back to the ship so I can sit down and get something to eat.” She looked at him like she was serious.

“This isn’t funny.”

“No, it’s not. But do you seriously expect me to murder you because you _deserve_ it? What good would that do? Killing you won’t bring anyone back – it won’t even prevent any _future_ distress or death. I was manipulated, you were manipulated. You fucked up. I did so, too. Don’t get me wrong I still want to kick your ass but-”

She didn’t know what else she wanted to say, what would follow the _‘but’_. He was angry with him, sure, but she also knew that he was already beating himself more up about this than she ever could. The injuries she’d cause would heal after a while but what he was feeling now, all the guilt, would follow him forever.

“You can’t reverse time. Your death won’t change anything. But your _life_ can.”

Yon-Rogg felt horrible for even thinking that, let alone for saying it out loud, but he just couldn’t and didn’t want to lie to her any more: “I don’t know if I can do that.”  
He saw her raising her arm in the corner of his eye and braced himself to get hit but instead her hand gently lied down on his shoulder, squeezing it softly.

“I know how hard it is when everything you believed turns out to be a lie,” she frowned, reminding herself this wasn’t just an empty platitude. “Like, trust me _. I do_.”

He still couldn’t look at her, his eyes focused on the tragedy he had caused.

“I honestly don’t know if you will ever be able to make up for all the harm you have caused. But the Yon-Rogg I know wouldn’t reject the challenge.”

He knew she was right - his life _could_ change things. And while all the destruction he had caused was already bad enough, not even trying to change for the better, to just run away from any responsibility by dying, would be even worse. He knew the Kree and their Army, the entire Empire really. If there was _anyone_ who could be of a great help for her to defeat them, it certainly was _him._

But… there was still this tiny bit of hope in him that told him that maybe he was wrong, that maybe his life _hasn’t_ been a lie. That maybe the Kree weren’t on the wrong side at all. And then there was this overwhelming shame of knowing he was just lying to himself.

_“It’s a cliché but you can easily get a Kree out of the Empire but hardly the Empire out of the Kree. You’ll learn to let go of that, mate.”_

“It takes time,” Carol explained, friendly tapping his shoulder before returning to the digging.

Yon-Rogg didn’t reply and he didn’t have to. She already knew what was going on inside his head; after all she had gone through the same. Actually, not _exactly_ the same _._ She only had to realize the past _six years_ of her life had been a lie. He had to live with that realization about his _entire_ life.

They buried the bodies carefully and without any ceremony as neither of them knew what to say.

When they slowly walked back to the ship and to an uncertain future, they both felt sorry for having failed them in their own way. And they promised themselves that this would never happen again.


	9. The Team

“Check mate.”

He moved the piece and looked at her as if to say _‘I told you so’_ , waiting for her to come up with yet another excuse. And of course he didn’t have to wait for long.

“What?” Carol was baffled, her eyes running over the board to check every possible move she could make – he was right. He’d beat her in the next turn no matter what she’d do. “ _Beginner’s luck._ ”

Her opponent raised a brow, completely unimpressed: “Three times in a row?”

“Once more.”

She refused to accept she got defeated by someone who just learnt how to play the game thirty minutes ago – _again_.

“ _Carol…”_ he sighed, almost annoyed by her drive but mainly still incredibly amused by her behavior. “If you want to win so desperately choose a game _you_ have a natural advantage at.”

“Are you saying I can’t beat you without a head start?” she snapped, already rearranging the pieces.

“No, I’m saying that playing a game that requires a lot of strategic thinking with a -” he stopped for a second before continuing. “- _former_ military commander _may_ not be the best idea you ever had.”

She knew he was right. It didn’t matter how long Yon-Rogg had been playing chess, he had played its real life version all his life. After all it _was_ a war game - but she still refused to give up.

They were sitting at a table as the ship automatically made its way to C-53. Going to Earth seemed like a good enough idea right now as it wasn’t infiltrated by the Kree – yet – and would therefore be a great base for whatever move they planned to do next. Also the idea of showing Yon-Rogg life on Earth and watching him fail doing the simplest tasks was quite appealing, e _specially_ considering she had to go through that when she woke up on Hala so reversing the roles was only fair, right?   
Still she was surprised Yon didn’t shoot her suggestion of going to C-53 down and was even more surprised when he agreed to play a game with her to kill some time. At least _that’s_ what she told him the reason was – in reality she was more worried about distracting him. Carol knew that leaving him alone to his thoughts right now would be his demise.

Also - yes, in a way it had been his fault she got into the situation in the first place but still - he had _always_ been there for her on Hala and now she wanted to do the same for him. It was the least she could do after being more or less responsible for his ruined life.

Not only did Yon-Rogg have to come to terms with knowing everything he had been taught (or at least a majority of it) was a lie, he also lost his purpose, his motivation in life. He wasn’t a soldier anymore, he wasn’t out there (thinking he was) actively protecting his people. Instead he was sitting in a small ship somewhere in space with no real plan or destination – and having nothing to do, not being _able_ to do anything was just torture.

Of course she didn’t have an entire Hasbro game collection on board – or even just one single game – so she had to improvise. A piece of paper and a pen would have to do the job. At first she thought about playing a card game with him but she didn’t feel like drawing 52 separate cards so her mind wandered chess. Drawing a board and then 32 little pieces that were all simply marked with a representative letter was easy enough.

He had watched her curiously as she drew the pieces and explained what each can do. She expected him to understand the rules immediately, which he did, and that he’d follow them perfectly, which he did as well, but what she didn’t expect was his arguing about their logic. After all, it should be easy for him to just follow instructions without questioning them.

_“If the queen is the most powerful piece why is the game over when you beat the king who’s essentially useless?”_

_“It’s like a Starforce mission basically. With me being the most powerful member, yet the mission would automatically fail if we’d lose the head of the group – the commander.”_

Yon-Rogg wasn’t sure if she was complimenting him by saying he was the most valuable member without whom the other’s would be lost, or if she was insulting him by comparing him to a chess piece that can only move one square per turn. The truth probably was somewhere in between.

_“_ So you’d be lost without me _,”_ he finally concluded, causing her to roll her eyes.

Now he had beaten her for the third time within not even half an hour and she slowly started to get frustrated. It was almost like they were back on the sparring mat where she would never able to knock him down, no matter what she tried - except for this one time.

“Remember when I beat you in training?” she tried to get back into a more casual conversation with him as they had barely talked while playing chess and the silence between them felt more uncomfortable than anything. She just wasn’t used to compete with him without some teasing or at least small talk.

Yon almost snorted: “You mean when you knocked me down for a second and were so busy boasting about it that I could easily throw you off balance again?”

“That was the _second_ round; the first was over when you landed straight on your back.”

He grinned: “Keep telling yourself that.”

Suddenly she realized how much they missed their training together. Actually, no, she _had_ thought about it quite a lot during the years they spent apart but it had never been as apparent to her as it was now.

It had become such a habit over time – Carol not being able, not _wanting_ to sleep anymore, running over to Yon-Rogg’s place who’d sometimes complain about the early hour yet would never turn her down, who, after a while, even started expecting and waiting for her, already in his full training gear. She missed the run to the gym, the conversations, how Yon never understood why she liked running so much (because it was just a way to reach a destination to him) but always kept running with her simply because _she_ enjoyed the activity. And she missed the gym itself, an old place at the bottom of lower Hala, where Yon-Rogg had been going to since he was a child and that he never stopped visiting.

Warriors, and even more so the elite of them, the Starforce, had a really high status on Hala, so as their leader Yon-Rogg was immensely popular and benefited from perks most other Kree couldn’t even dream of. Carol had always been convinced that if he’d just _ask_ , he’d get a whole gym for himself, yet instead he stayed loyal to the one he had always gone to – even though it was well below his status now.

When they went there for the first time she didn’t understand why they weren’t simply using one of the gyms the military base already had, since their placement was obviously way more convenient. She wondered if it maybe was somewhat of a quirk Yon-Rogg had, that he took all his trainees to the place he started at. It wasn’t until she heard from the other Starforce members that Yon-Rogg had never taken them there, that _she_ was the only one he had let into _his_ place, that she realized _how_ special this was to him. How special _she_ was to him.

“That gym you always went to…” she mumbled, lost in thoughts.

He frowned, confused by her train of thought: “You mean _we_ went to.”

“Yeah but _why_ did _we_ go it?”

“I know you completely missed the point but I _tried_ to teach you some things in combat.”

Carol didn’t know if he was purposely playing dumb or just really didn’t understand what she was talking about. She wouldn’t put either past him.

“Why did we go to _this_ one?” she clarified. “We could have just trained in one of the military gyms.”

Maybe she was just imagining things but he seemed to get slightly nervous: “Why are you asking that _now?_ ”

“Because for a couple of years, I didn’t realize you never took anyone else there. And when I finally did, I still never understood why you just took _me_ but also didn’t want to ask because I knew you wouldn’t give me a straight answer anyway _._ ”

“Why would I do that now then?”

“I just _know_ you will,” she tapped two of her fingers on the table, a small spark escaping them.

He looked unimpressed by her ‘threat’ but still cleared his throat as he shifted on his seat a bit and reached over to one of the paper chess pawns to make his first move. The fact that he needed a moment to reply instead of doing it naturally only made his behavior seem more suspicious to her.

“You were a hazard with your powers and I couldn’t let you hurt other people accidentally,” he drily explained while gesturing at her side of the board to announce her turn.

She raised a brow, not even thinking about playing chess right now: “That’s why you took me to a civilian gym? To harm them instead of other Kree warriors?”

“No, of course not!” he rushed to say, realizing how ridiculous his excuse was. “I just… I guess I wanted to show you a bit of… Hala. With you being Terran and all.”

Carol should be mad about how obvious he was lying to her, how he still _dared_ to lie to her, but seeing him struggle to find a coherent reply was just too entertaining. She even cracked a smile.

“That wasn’t a sightseeing tour,” she crossed her arms. “The gym has nothing to do with Hala except for coincidentally being on said planet. You wanted to show me a part of _you._ Not Hala.”

Yon-Rogg huffed, admitting to his defeat: “Okay and what’s wrong with that?”

She smiled broadly and shook her head.

“Nothing. I just think it’s interesting you never took anyone else there.”

He looked away, deciding on whether he wants to stand up and go away or continue to endure this conversation but there really wasn’t any place he could hide on this ship so he stayed still – not that he’d ever hide from anyone of course. He’d just… move his legs.

“Maybe I _did_ take _everyone else_ there at some point,” he finally said, causing Carol to only grin wider.

“No, you didn’t. I _asked_ everyone else. They didn’t even know about the gym, let alone where it is.”

“I would have come around to show them,” Yon-Rogg trailed off.

“Just admit I’ve always been your favorite,” she had him exactly where she wanted him to be and couldn’t hide the amusement in her voice anymore.

He still didn’t look at her: “I don’t play favorites.”

She laughed, wondering if he actually believed that. Everyone in the team knew Minn-Erva hated Carol because Yon-Rogg liked her so much, because _she_ was his favorite – not her. It took her a few years to really realize what was going on and once she did it was almost a relief. She had always wondered what she was doing wrong but knowing it wasn’t her fault and that Minn-Erva was just jealous gave her some power over the situation.

There had been so many instances where Minn-Erva was rude towards her after Yon-Rogg had talked to Carol privately instead of in front of the entire group and once she knew _how_ often they met and trained together, she was basically constantly pissed.

Since Carol knew the truth about her past, she had been wondering if Yon-Rogg had only spent more time with her than with anyone else to control her and she constantly told herself that this was the exact reason. That there really was no other reason. That he never liked her to begin with. It was easier that way, to get over all the lies, to not miss her time in the Starforce – her time with _him_. Being angry was just less complicated than being hurt.

But the last couple of days she had started to stop trying to convince herself that he had _only_ used her, that he never liked her even a tiny bit. Maybe for once, and she couldn’t believe she was considering this, the Intelligence _had_ said the truth. Maybe he had _really_ done all of this because he wanted to not because it was an order.

After all, Minn-Erva knew about who Vers really was – so if Yon-Rogg was _only_ spending time with her to control her, why would she be that jealous?

Now that she got to spend time with him again, the thought was way more comforting than focusing on the ways he had wronged her – even though she still had trouble admitting this to herself.

“In fact, I still _am_ your favorite,” she teased.

“I liked you better when you still hated me,” Yon grumbled, pushing his chair away from the table.

“I can tease _and_ hate you at the same time.”

Did she actually hate him though? She always liked to tell herself she did because that’s what he deserves after having lied to her for all those years. But at the same time… he had never mistreated her – quite the opposite actually. And he _had_ saved her life – twice. Granted he was more or less responsible for her getting into life-threatening danger to begin with, but he had still chosen to rescue her.

“So, what are we going to do on _C-53_?” he asked to change the topic as he stood up, looking over to the control room. He knew exactly she wanted him to call the planet Earth but he wouldn’t let her have this right now.

“We’re going shopping,” Carol explained. She wasn’t even joking – Yon-Rogg really needed new clothes. The ones he had from his time in imprisonment were good enough to cover his body from the eyes of others but that’s where their function ended.

“I’m not going to wear Terran clothing.”

“Very well. Run around naked then,” she shrugged. “Ronan will love that.”

He shot her a look: “Fine. But _I_ get to choose them.”

She had thought about denying that request as forcing him to wear something ridiculous would be more fun. But the embarrassment of running around in a full-body bunny suit would probably be lost on him as he didn’t know how Terrans actually dress anyway. She raised her hands to surrender.

“Be my guest.”

“In what?” he looked at her in confusion. She didn’t necessarily forget he doesn’t know English idioms, she just liked seeing him that puzzled, which is why she continued to use them whenever possible.

“It means I give you the permission to do so.”

“Oh, how merciful.”

She smiled at him as if she took his compliment seriously and was actually flattered.

“And what _else_ are we gonna do?”

“We need supplies, so we’ll get those too. And I want pizza.”

“I don’t know what pizza is and the way you said it makes me believe it _isn’t_ something that will help us in our situation.”

“It’ll fill my stomach, so it sure as hell will help.”

He sighed, growing more impatient: “And what are we gonna do _after_ that?”

Resting her head on her hand she narrowed her eyes: “That depends on what _you_ want to do. How _far_ you want to go.”

They haven’t really spoken about what their plans were, if Yon-Rogg actively wanted to fight against the Kree Empire or if he just wanted to refuse to be a part of it any longer. She knew he was a man of action and sitting around idly wouldn’t suit him, but she also knew how loyal he was and how hard it would be for him to turn against everything he has known all his life.

Yon-Rogg nodded earnestly, having expected her to ask something like that.

“I assume you are still in contact with that Talos guy.”

“What do you want from him?” she asked surprised, lifting her head up again.

“I don’t trust him,” he stated and quickly continued as he already saw her opening her mouth to protest. “But _you_ do and I think if we - if you actually meant what you said, that you want to _end_ the war – we need to change the perception on _both_ sides. And if he’s as noble as you think he is, he’d be of a great help with that.”

“So you still believe the Skrull are evil?” she frowned.

“No. But I’m also not naïve enough to believe _all_ of them are good.”

“Well, you were naïve enough to believe they _all_ of them were bad.”

She anticipated for him to get annoyed or even angry with her but he didn’t.

“Yes. And I won’t make the same mistake twice. You know the Kree aren’t evil. You’ve lived with us, you _were_ one of us. I should have realized sooner that the Skrull aren’t _completely_ evil either, I admit that. But to now drift into the other extreme would be even worse.”

“So what are you suggesting?”

“Teaching the people, especially the children, on both sides to stop judging an entire race for what individuals do.”

Carol smiled at how eager he sounded. She certainly hadn’t expected to end up here when she accidentally freed him but she was more than glad about it. When she had sent him back to Hala she knew that if they’d see each other again, she eventually would have to fight him – and she knew she probably wouldn’t be able to do that. So to now know have him on her side was more than a blessing – it was liberation.

“The Supreme Intelligence will never allow that,” she pointed out.

“I didn’t plan on involving them in the process,” he said in a tone as if what she had just pointed out was needless to say.

“I’m aware of that, idiot,” Carol rolled her eyes. “I was wondering how you want to change the Kree’s mind despite that A.I. being in power.”

“Are you a part of this team or not? I can’t come up with the entire detailed plan on my own in this short amount of time,” he almost snapped.

“This team?” she cock her head.

“You and me.”

“Then yes, I am a part of it. It’s wild but I like to identify with the you-part.”

In the end it had always been them. _The team_. Even when they were a part of the Starforce it was always them. They were the ones who spend the most time together, who trusted each other more than anyone else. Back then they might have been on the wrong side but now they’d finally work together for the right purpose.

And even though she would never admit it to him, she wouldn’t want anyone else on her side. At least not for this, well, _mission_.

She stood up and stretched out her hand. He had instantly raised his hand to shake hers but stopped when he saw the unusual position. The palm was facing downward.

“You are supposed to lay your hand on mine.”

He followed her instructions - hesitantly but he did it.

“What are we doing?” he asked skeptically.

She quickly lifted her hand, hoisting his as well but that didn’t answer his question.

“It’s a team thing,” she explained, not planning to go further into detail as she still took too much pleasure in his confusion.

“Why are you like this?” he wondered without waiting for a reply. He had already given up on getting an actual answer before he even asked.

Yon-Rogg had hardly ever understood her idioms and human mannerisms but that had never truly bothered either of them. In fact, he actually had always _liked_ that about her. She was different and he was drawn to that.

A beeping noise announced they’d soon reach their desired destination causing both of them to head to the control room.

As she turned off the autopilot and he sat down next to her, she suddenly started grinning again. Yon-Rogg nearly groaned, knowing whatever she would say would annoy him.

“Since you just recently had an encounter with our dear and beloved Intelligence,” she began, causing him to become tense.

He didn’t want to think about it. Not now – not ever.

“And I’m your favorite person,” she continued, mischief in her voice and Yon-Rogg immediately realized where she was going with this.

“ _No._ ”

She didn’t let herself get deterred: “It’s me you see, isn’t it?”

Carol was smiling, obviously trying to tease him and for a moment he thought about if he should change the topic, ignore her _or_ lie but then he decided that offence usually is the best defense and therefore would completely knock her out of her stride.

“Yes.”

“C’mon, you- _what_?”

“Since my return to Hala, the Supremor would assume your appearance.”

His plan had worked. She didn’t know what to say anymore.

He was sure she’d be quiet until they landed but suddenly she started laughing, making him wonder what’s so funny. When she finally pulled herself again and had enough breath to speak, she still couldn’t stop smiling.

“They must have been so pissed about that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to clarify: 
> 
> The gym we see in the film really is a local gym at the bottom of lower Hala that Yon-Rogg has been going to since he was a child and that he considers "his place". That's where he takes Vers. It's not a gym owned by the military or Starforce. I didn't make that up, it's actual canon stated in the art book for Captain Marvel.   
> Them running to said gym even though Yon doesn't really like running is canon as well. It's said in "Starforce on the Rise" which is an official Marvel/Disney novel that features two adventures of Vers and the Starforce before the events in the film.   
> The later has a shitton of cute moments between Yon-Rogg and Vers and it really highlights how much he likes her. If you are interested in it but don't want to buy the book (yet) I scream about it on my blog: http://judelaw.co/tagged/starforce+on+the+rise


	10. The Hideout

Carol was aware of the weird looks they were getting walking through the mall like that. She had changed into a more casual outfit before they left the ship but his fairly unusual prison clothes, which thankfully weren’t recognizable as such, so at least she didn’t have to deal with people calling the police on them, were quite an eye-catcher. She wasn’t bothered by them and hadn’t expected him to be annoyed by it either, and he really wasn’t, but he still was very anxious about the attention they were getting. He wasn’t used to ruining around on a foreign planet without any military endeavor and therefore uncomfortable by being seen, even though there wasn’t a reason why he shouldn’t be.

At first she had thought he just wasn’t used to people not bowing down and saluting him wherever he went but she soon realized the issue was much deeper than that. Especially considering she knew he had never been arrogant about the admiration he was receiving from the Kree and had always treated them kindly, so humans not reacting in such a special way towards him certainly shouldn’t be a big blow to his ego.

His unnecessary highly alerted state had started to make her feel nervous as well so she was relieved when they finally reached the clothing store and would get him something proper to wear, which would automatically put an end to the weird looks - and therefore hopefully make Yon-Rogg be more relaxed.

For someone who was completely against wearing Terran clothing, he headed quite quickly straight towards an aisle that was filled with t-shirts but she immediately pulled him back.

“I won’t spend 100 bucks on a stupid shirt, try these over there instead,” she pointed at a table that along with shirts of different colors also had a ‘ _SALE’_ sign on it.

Yon-Rogg looked at the aisle then at the table and then back at her, obviously confused: “But they look _exactly_ the same.”

“Yeah but those are more expensive and I don’t want to get broke just because you decided to become a fashion model.”

His eyes wandered from the aisle to the table again: “What’s the difference?”

“The brand,” she explained, already picking up one of the shirts and holding it against his chest to figure out his size. “They have a different price because they have different manufacturers.”

He let her try several shirts against his upper body while raising an eyebrow, absolutely not familiar with the concept: “Shouldn’t we invest in the more expensive ones to have something of a higher quality?”

“First of all, _I_ invest in this-“

“You can make up for all the breakfasts I paid for you after training when you kicked me out of bed. It’s only fair.”

She frowned but continued, not willing to have such a discussion right now: “Second, just because something is more expensive _doesn’t_ mean it’s of a higher quality. _Also_ you are just supposed to run around in them for now, not fight in an entire war.”

“If the material isn’t better than why are they more expensive?” he still didn’t understand the way Terrans priced their goods.

“ _Because of the brand_.”

“That’s not making any sense.”

“Welcome to Earth.”

Yon-Rogg still had no idea what she was even talking about but decided it wasn’t worth his time anymore to try to understand this foreign culture. Instead he started to look through the clothes she was allowing him to consider himself.

He was rather pragmatic so after about ten minutes he had settled on a plain shirt, a pair of black jeans, a simple jacket that would be enough to keep him warm in the current mild winter temperatures, as well as a pair of trainers. The latter had a star on each tongue and whether it was a conscious decision by Yon-Rogg or not, Carol found this particular choice rather endearing. They didn’t know how long they would stay on Earth so just in case she would get three of the shirts, two pants and some underwear as she didn’t want him to run around in the very same clothes for weeks.

At first, he had been heavily resistant of trying the shirt and trousers on in the shop but Carol managed to convince him it would be necessary so they could be sure they would actually fit.

In reality she just wanted to have some fun.

“They fit,” he insisted behind the curtain, heavily annoyed already but she wouldn’t give up that easily.

“Show me.”

“I’m a grown man, I know if clothes have the correct size.”

“ _Show me_.”

He didn’t even know _why_ he stepped out of the changing room but there he was, in these Terran outfits, in a Terran store, surrounded by Terrans.

She immediately started to pull on the bottom hem as she walked around him, eyeing him carefully just to embarrass him. And surprisingly it was working. Of course he didn’t _show_ any signs of embarrassment _but_ he was visibly irritated by her, which always was the best indicator for the success of her strategy.

“Can you stop,” it wasn’t a question.

“I _can_ yes,” she smiled innocently, starting to shift the collar.

He pushed her hands away and walked back, separating them forcefully with the curtain. She was grinning when she told him to keep the clothes on and that she’ll pay for them this way. He didn’t reply, or rather he _did_ reply by making a grumpy noise, causing her grin to become even wider.

When they finally made their way out of the mall, Carol carefully counted the remaining cash she had left, thoughtfully considering her options. They had decided to stay in a motel as of now simply because staying in her ship would make them an easy target for the Kree. This way, even if or when they’d figure out on which planet they were hiding on, they still wouldn’t be able to find them as quickly. She still had some money left from her last stay on Earth but it was rather sparsely and she realized she’d soon have to contact Maria to help her out.

Carol sighed, both at the thought of having to explain to Maria what she needed the money for and the realization that what she had wasn’t enough for both the motel room _and_ the pizza.

Thanks to the magic of the internet - something that was still fairly new to her but that she considered quite an amazing invention she even bragged in front of Yon-Rogg about (who seemed rather unimpressed but she figured he was probably just acting, not willing to admit Terrans invented something the Kree didn’t have) - they had found their way to what probably was the worst motel in town but therefore exactly what they were looking for: affordable.

The receptionist, an elderly lady, gave Carol a knowing look, almost winking at her as she handed over the money for one night. It had first confused her but then she processed how two adults without any luggage who were looking for a motel room must look like to her. Yon-Rogg didn’t notice anything - or at least didn’t ask if he did – which she was more than thankful for as she _really_ didn’t feel like explaining it to him.

What she _did_ feel like though was to vex him.

Reaching their room, she handed over the key and told him to open the door, knowing exactly that he had never seen a key in his life, let alone knew how to use it. She imagined seeing him struggle would be quite entertaining. And it was.

Thinking if Terrans can do it, it couldn’t be _that_ hard, he had taken on the task. He looked at this small piece of metal in his hand, noticing the small dots on it and figured they must be some kind of code for the door to read.

He held up the key to what he thought was the reading device for the code, a thing which Carol would later identify as the spyhole. Nothing was happening so Yon-Rogg had to alter his strategy while trying to ignore her giggling. Holding the key against the handle wasn’t working either so he tried his luck by running his hand along the door frame, searching for a button or something similar – just in case one needed to activate the reading device before being able to use it.

When he was desperate enough to lie down on the floor, Carol, now actually laughing, decided to release him. She took the key out of his hands, put it into the lock and turned it around, giving the door a little push so it would slowly open while she looked at him smugly.

“I don’t see what was so difficult about that.”

He didn’t even glance at her, trying to not give her the satisfaction she was yearning for but the expression on his face was enough to do so.

“How was I supposed to know you Terrans are _this_ backward,” the doors he had seen at the mall were opening automatically so he had expected C-53 to be more advanced than that. The fact that even _if_ he would have known it wasn’t an automatic door, he _still_ wouldn’t have known how to open it was something he tried to ignore.

Carol was having too much fun to get mad at him for insulting humanity as a whole. He wasn’t even wrong, technically. Hala was _by far_ more advanced than Earth but that didn’t give him to right to be a prick about it.

The room was as simple as you’d expect for the price, only filled with an old TV, a small table that came along with a chair (that appeared to collapse if you just _looked_ at it the wrong way), as well as a single bed – _of course_ the lady had chosen a room that didn’t have separate beds, thinking she was doing them a favor. Without saying anything she sat down and stretched herself out, while Yon was inspecting this room and attached bathroom. She made herself comfortable, turning on the TV to catch up with the latest sitcoms. Perhaps she should watch the news instead, educating herself on the latest happenings, but she had really seen enough suffering the past few days.

The bathroom was just as basic, Yon detected. It was equipped with a slightly broken mirror, however, which allowed him to get a look at himself for the first time in what felt like ages. Once he was staring into the face of a proud and noble Kree hero, who was eager to protect his people and now all he saw was a fool. A traitor of his own nation, a nobody with nowhere left to go, no home, no nothing. And he looked incredibly tried. Physically the last couple of days hadn’t been exhausting – except for the injection which didn’t count as his body had already recovered from that – but mentally they were just draining. He didn’t even know _what_ he was feeling anymore. On one hand he felt horrible for having believed the lies, the propaganda, his entire life without questioning them once, _just once_ , harming innocent people in the process. On the other hand he knew he hadn’t been _completely_ wrong. Skrulls were evil – not all of them, yes, but he had seen those who were – the propaganda wasn’t entirely incorrect, it was just exaggerated. _Heavily exaggerated_. Just as their behavior was. Still he felt awful for betraying his people like that, the very people who had looked up to him, who had seen him as a hero. His mind knew he wasn’t betraying _them_ (he’d still do anything in his power to protect innocent Kree); he was, _rightfully_ , betraying the Supreme Intelligence. He could be against the Supremor _and_ still be protective of the Kree, who just as the Skrull weren’t solely evil either. But something inside of him didn’t believe that. A voice that called him a disgusting traitor, a voice so loud that it was impossible to ignore.

 _Traitor_.

She heard him try out tap before returning and sitting down at the other side of the bed, somewhat restless. Carol could tell his head was somewhere else, which was a sight she had _never_ seen during their years on Hala but that had become common during the bygone day.

“Are you not going to ask where _you_ are supposed to sleep?” she asked trying to sound serious, not knowing how else to distract him – or if she even _should_ distract him.

She had told herself she was doing him a favor by diverting his mind all the time, but maybe she was doing it for herself and not for him. Maybe she was just scared that giving him the chance to think would lead change of mind.

“There is only bed and it’s big enough for both of us so no, why would I?”

“Because that’s what a gentleman would do.”

He wrinkled up his nose: “I’m not sleeping on the floor. Feel welcome to do so.”

Without any warning she kicked him forcefully enough to make him lose his balance, causing him to fall off the bed and hit the ground with a dull noise. She heard him sigh as if he accepted his position on the ground but then saw him lift himself up to sit on the bed again.

When he shifted his position to be able to lean his back against the wall, Carol slightly flinched expecting him to hit her which didn’t go unnoticed by him.

“ _I’m_ not that childish, Carol.”

She wanted to reply but before she got the chance to he had pushed her off the bed, making it her turn to lie flat on the ground.

When she managed to climb back he was still grinning.

The night had went by as uneventful as one would expect and when in the morning they had eaten the rest of the supplies they had taken with them from the ship, Carol knew she couldn’t avoid Maria any longer.

Knowing her best friend, she surely wouldn’t be pleased figuring Carol needed some money not only for herself but _also_ for the guy who had captured them and then tried to get all of them killed, or rather everyone _but_ Carol, just a few years ago. The stereotypical _‘he has changed’_ wouldn’t be convincing either. And of course she didn’t blame Maria – especially not after having just suffered from the consequences of trusting him _too_ early a couple of days ago. But now he had chosen her – no, _the better cause_ – over the Kree Empire, she had _seen_ him do it. She could trust him now, at least for the most part but she also still tried to be cautious and not fall for the same lies _again_. Maybe he hadn’t changed and all of this was just a scheme to really gain her trust and make her work for the Kree again. Yes, it would be quite extreme and elaborate but she didn’t put anything past them.

However, Yon-Rogg _really_ had seemed devastated. In fact, he still obviously, to her, was in distress. His sleep hadn’t been tranquil either – not that she had ever spent nights with him in the same before but she assumed that restlessly turning from one side to another while sweating and muttering in his sleep wasn’t a normal behavior for him. He _wasn’t_ acting. She _really_ could trust him this time.

_Right?_

She heard a frustrated noise coming from Yon, bringing her attention to the way he was awkwardly putting on his trainers; and for a moment she wondered if binding the laces behind your ankle was some kind of fashion statement until she realized that he just didn’t know how to tie his shoes.

For a split second she wanted to make fun of him again but then she remembered how _he_ had never ridiculed her for not knowing something on Hala, so maybe it really was enough now.

“Let me help you,” she said sincerely but still gaining a skeptical glance.

Crawling over the bed and kneeling in front of him she explained how to do it step by step and even though he didn’t trust her completely and waited for some kind of punchline, he listened carefully and followed the instructions perfectly on the other shoe.

“Why do you even have such tiny ropes on shoes?” he complained once he was finished.

“Hey, _you_ chose them. You could have gone for simple boots or something.”

He opened his mouth to respond with _‘But I liked these’_ however not wanting to give her the affirmation that he actually didn’t mind these Terran clothes _that_ much, he didn’t say anything.

Carol understood him anyway.

They had never needed a lot of words to communicate – though using them for banter was fun – and though they hadn’t spent the past couple of years even slightly close to each other (in contrast to the six years of basically not leaving each other’s side) this still hadn’t changed.

“Do you remember Maria?” Carol asked, still procrastinating from actually going to her.

She had considered not even telling her truthfully what she needed the money for but lying would be kind of hypocritical since she expected Yon-Rogg to not do that either. And in the end she _did_ deserve to know the truth – especially when her own hard-earned money was at stake. Carol honestly wouldn’t blame her if she didn’t give them a single coin but she _still_ prayed Maria would help them out just to make things easier.

Yon-Rogg, mentally repeating the shoe-tie-steps to avoid having to ask her for help again, looked up with a puzzled countenance.

“The human lady you tried to kill on Mar-Vell’s ship.”

“Oh,” he moved his foot to experience the luxury of them not being on the edge of falling off anymore. “Well, _technically_ I was after you and the Skrull-”

His eyes met her _‘Don’t even try to go there’_ expression, causing him to immediately shut up.

“She’ll hopefully provide us with some money since I completely ran out of it.”

“ _Us?_ ” Yon questioned, obviously as little convinced by her generosity as Carol was. “Is it typical for Terrans to give money to the people who tried to kill them?”

“No, unless they are threatened it’s not,” she didn’t like his usage of ‘Terrans’ instead of ‘humans’ but was too worried by the whole situation to correct him. “But she’s the only person I can think of that would be willing to help us.”

Well except for Fury, she thought. But he’d surely have something better to do right now. And she had chosen _this_ town with Maria in mind anyway.

“So, I’ll wait here until you have talked to her.”

“No, you are coming with me. Firstly because we should always stay together just in case the Kree _do_ find our location, and secondly it’ll make her able to let out her anger by punching and screaming at you - which could be quite useful to calm her down.”

That didn’t sound like a fun trip to him but in the end he knew he would deserve it – and also she was just a Terran, it wasn’t like she could _actually_ hurt him. So he agreed to come along, even though Carol didn’t leave him a choice anyway.

The town they were staying at was the closest to Maria’s house but it would still take about an hour to get to her. Yon was curiously watching the cars and buildings they passed, trying to learn from his surroundings to blend in as perfect as possible. She had to hold him back twice when he was about to cross a street, ignoring the traffic light but once she had explain the concept to him, it never happened again.

When they finally reached the countryside and were surrounded by trees and fields instead of houses, they both started to relax a bit. Yon-Rogg because he didn’t have to try to get as little attention as possible anymore (even though Carol had told him he just looked like a normal human being anyway) and Carol because she didn’t have to constantly safe him from running into his death.

She had been feeling sick all morning but when she could spot Maria’s house in the distance, the sickness was almost overwhelming her. Carol really had tried to come up with something she wanted to say but there really was nothing she _could_ say that would make the situation better.

“Wait here until I wave you over,” she told Yon-Rogg when they had reached the last tree before her house. “If you stand next to or behind me, she’ll probably think you kidnapped me.”

“When in fact _I’m_ the kidnapped one.”

She hit his arm, almost making him laugh.

Ringing the doorbell took her a lot of courage but she managed to do it anyway. She heard the sound of a chair moving on the inside as well as steps that were advancing towards her and became tenser than she had expected to.

“Aunt Carol!” Monica had opened the door and now happily threw her arms around her.

“Lieutenant Trouble,” Carol replied in a serious tone like the young teenager was had a higher military rank than her. “You’ve grown so much.”

Monica saluted.

Looking past her the she saw Maria approaching the door with a smile as she put the plate she had just been cleaning away. When she had reached her they hugged and both expressed their gladness that the other one was doing well.

“What are you doing on good old Earth?” Maria asked when releasing her from the embrace, taking a step back. “A break from saving the universe?”

“I wish,” she smiled but Maria could see something was worrying her.

“Come inside. Monica, get our superhero something to drink,” Maria ordered, simply to send her daughter away for a moment without causing any suspicion. When she was sure the teenager was far enough away, she whispered: “Everything okay?”

“Yes, yes. It’s just… It’s a long story.”

“Do you want me take Monica to her grandparents?”

“No, it’s fine, really.”

Maria was about to close the door and she gestured in the direction of the table to suggest they both sit down but Carol quickly stopped her from shutting it completely. She didn’t want Yon-Rogg to stand around on his own outside and maybe it was better to just get over with it instead of sitting down for an hour and explaining what happened without getting straight to the point. She’ll be mad either way.

“Wait, I have a – _friend_ outside,” Carol explained, really not knowing how else she should introduce Yon-Rogg.

“Oh, why didn’t they come with you?” Maria asked, opening the door again. “Another Skrull you saved?”

Carol waved towards the figure waiting in the shadow of the tree: “Well, I _did_ save him but he isn’t a Skrull…”

As Yon-Rogg was approaching them, Maria started to recognize him.

“Carol, that’s not your friend!” she exclaimed, obviously thinking she had been talking about someone else and Yon-Rogg had just taken their place as she slammed the door, ready to get her friend and Monica out of the house.

Avoiding her grasp, Carol opened the door again, raising her hands conciliating to reassure her they weren’t in any danger: “No, he _is_ the friend.”

Maria just stared at her: “Who are you and what have you done to Carol?”

 “I’m the woman who had to suffer through cockpit-jokes along with you, now let me explain,” she reached out to pull Yon-Rogg, who had been slowing down his pace once he noticed the conversation wasn’t going the way they wanted, closer.

Maria however didn’t even give her the chance to do so.

“Listen shitface, I don’t know what you did to Carol but you fucking reverse it,” she had grabbed his collar while Yon-Rogg stood perfectly still, not even thinking about defending himself as he knew Maria really wasn’t a threat to him.

“I didn’t do anything,” he explained calmly, looking over to Carol for guidance without _actually_ expecting any help as he was aware of her affinity for seeing him struggle.

“Mom?” Monica had slowly entered the room, holding a glass of orange juice, as she watched her mother threaten an unknown man. She was obviously confused and scared by the situation.

“Stay back, Monica,” Maria grumbled, her eyes still fixed on Yon-Rogg’s face who still looked as unimpressed as ever. Even when she lifted her fist he didn’t move but before she could punch him, Carol had grabbed her arm and held her back.

“Maria, let me explain, okay?” she pleaded, holding her friends hand tightly. “Trust me. _Please_.”

The woman hesitated for a moment but then slowly let go of Yon-Rogg’s collar, however not without pushing him back forcefully first.

“If you even _think_ about coming too close to my daughter, you’re dead.”

Yon-Rogg raised a brow wondering how this Terran wanted to cause even a tiny scratch on his body, let alone end his life, but he didn’t say anything.

“If it makes you feel more safe,” Carol held her glowing hand in front of Yon’s face. “He has absolutely no chance against me.”

“I’d feel safer if he were somewhere else. In a volcano, for example.”

When things had calmed down a bit and they all sat at the kitchen table – even Monica as Maria figured she’d rather have her daughter close by just in case Yon-Rogg had other Kree members around, who could easily break into her room and kidnap her – Carol explained what had happened the last couple of days.

Once she finished her story, both Monica and Maria were silent for a while until the latter sighed and hid her face in her hands.

“So let me get this straight: You are now BFF with the man who not only lied to you for six years but also lied to you _again_ \- after you had rescued him – and sold you the bad guys.”

“If you put it like that-“

“What’s BFF?” Yon-Rogg dared to ask innocently, earning an evil eye from Maria.

“It stands for best friends forever,” Monica explained enthusiastically. She was old enough to understand the seriousness of the conversation but also wasn’t as warry of Yon-Rogg as her mother. She trusted Carol and if she trusted that man then he must be alright. Yes, she knew he had tried to get her mother killed at some point – but Talos and his friends had tried to murder Carol too and they trusted them anyway. So maybe he really was okay.

“Thank you,” Yon-Rogg replied politely as he tried to present himself in the best possible light – knowing it would be a small really dim light but a light nonetheless. However, Maria seemed to think of that differently.

“Don’t you _dare_ to talk to her,” she hissed and he didn’t even bother to reply to that.

Clearing her throat, Carol got everyone’s attention again: “I completely understand you don’t trust this idiot.”

“I’m not-” he started to protest but Carol cut him off by kicking his leg under the table.

“You don’t need to trust him at all. But I need you to trust _me_ ,” she rose her voice to speak over any possible complaint by Yon-Rogg. “I’m sure he can _and will_ help us to end the war between the Kree and the Skrull. Remember? That’s what Mar-Vell, _Lawson,_ always wanted.”

Maria almost laughed: “Yeah, before _he_ killed her.”

“I was ordered to kill her. She was a traitor,” Yon insisted, making Carol roll her eyes and wonder who had missed out on teaching him what an apology was. “Just like I am one now.”

“Maybe someone should shoot _you_ then,” Maria spit.

“Yes, maybe someone should,” he admitted, nodding his head.

“I have a gun in my-“

“I think he’s alright!” Monica leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms. “Aunt Carol trusts him. And if he does something stupid, she can just incinerate him.”

Carol pointed a finger gun in her direction, which made Monica grin. Her mother wasn’t even nearly as sold as her but she didn’t really have a choice. Of course she would give Carol the money she asked for - she couldn’t desert her best friend. All she hoped was that Carol _really_ knew what she was doing and wouldn’t have to regret trusting him _again_.

“Alright, but I’m not happy about it,” she stood up to get the money, glancing at Yon-Rogg. “And if you dare to lay a finger on her, you are dead.”

“I’ve laid more than a finger on her in my life. Sparring for example results in a lot of body contact,” he said, slightly confused by why he wasn’t allowed to touch Carol with a single finger.

Monica laughed.

“It means you aren’t allowed to hurt her, not even a little bit,” she explained, obviously pitying the man who didn’t understand any kind of idioms.

Maria gave Carol a look that said ‘ _make sure he doesn’t do anything to Monica’_ before leaving the room which Carol returned with a small nod, though she knew Yon-Rogg wouldn’t do anything to her even if they were alone.

The teenager now leaned forward: “ _So,_ how is life on a different planet? I mean like, growing up. Aunt Carol only lived on – what was it called – for six years but you were born there right? What is your planet like? Do you get born like humans or do you hatch from eggs or something? Can you do something super cool? Like heating something with your hands or changing your entire body?”

Yon-Rogg was a bit taken aback by her curiosity and wasn’t sure if he should reply to her at all. He looked at Carol who shortly closed her eyes to give him the permission to speak to her.

“Hala is really beautiful and not comparable to C- _Earth_ at all. The entire planet is basically covered by a city that consists of two separate layers. The upper one is the military; it protects lower Hala from the enemy’s attacks. We have a long and proud history and are _way_ more advanced than Terrans. No, we don’t hatch from eggs; our physiology is quite similar to yours – just _better_. We heal faster, we are stronger, and we are more resistant. Hala’s gravity is stronger than the one you have here which probably contributed to that.”

“And what are your powers?”

“He can be a huge pain in the ass,” Carol replied while patting his shoulder. Yon-Rogg didn’t answer.

Whenever they were going through lower Hala or took the public transport, fellow Kree had constantly shown Yon-Rogg their respect and gratitude. It was always directed at _him_ , not Carol, as she hadn’t made a name for herself yet. To the Kree Yon-Rogg was this untouchable hero but even back then he had wondered when they were going to realize that Vers is the special one, t _he hero_. Not him. Here on C-53 the difference between them seemed to be obvious.

Maria had returned with the money, handing it to Carol who reached out for it but Maria immediately pulled it back: “ _One condition_.”

“Anything.”

“You will _at least_ call every day you are on Earth - so we know you are still alive - and tell us when you leave.”

“What are you gonna do if she doesn’t?” Yon-Rogg asked, really not helping his case here, getting kicked by Carol again.

“I promise,” she quickly responded before Maria would try to murder him.

“Why can’t they just stay here? We have an extra room,” Monica wondered out loud, hoping to spend more time with Carol – and maybe get more information from Yon-Rogg as she found the life of foreign species incredibly fascinating. “This way you could check on Aunt Carol anytime too.”

Her mother didn’t even seem to consider that option: “The sooner I get _him_ out of the house, the better. _You_ are welcome to stay here, Carol.”

She smiled gently at both Monica and Maria, shaking her head.

“We need to stay together,” seeing Monica’s disappointed face she added. “But I’ll call every day and if there is enough time I’ll visit you again, okay?”

“Only without him,” Maria interposed.

Thankfully no one was interested in having an awkward dinner so they went to say their farewell, which consisted of Monica and Maria hugging her simultaneously, the latter telling her to be careful and not blindly trust him. Yon-Rogg had already walked ahead bit when Carol caught up to him. The sun had just set so when they had made half of their way back, they found themselves in the middle of a starry winter night.

Carol rested her hands in the pockets of her jacket, looking up to the sky, remembering the time when she thought she’d never be able to reach any of those little dots, when all those stars were mysterious far away concepts instead of the reality of her daily life. She surely didn’t regret being able to travel through space and visit pretty much every planet she wants, but they _had_ lost this mystifying aura around them - which thankfully didn’t mean she had lost all the love for the night sky and its constellations that had been a part of her since she was a child.

“Remember when we used to stargaze together?” She asked, lost in thoughts.

Yon-Rogg, who had looked up as well thinking of Hala, frowned: “Why do you think there is a chance that I don’t remember it?”

“I don’t. It’s just a phrase, you know?”

“No, I don’t know.”

“That’s also just- Never mind.”

He sighed: “Yes, I _do_ remember - though I would rather call it a lesson in astronomy than _stargazing_.”

“Very romantic,” she laughed, still looking at the stars.

Yon-Rogg didn’t quite understand what she meant: “I wasn’t trying to be romantic, I was being educational.”

Carol suddenly stopped walking, causing him to do the same. Pointing at the stars she said: “Let _me_ give _you_ a lesson then.”

He followed the direction her finger was turned towards to but couldn’t see anything – or rather nothing extraordinary. Just a few stars.

“ _That’s_ the Big Dipper.”

He _really_ tried but he couldn’t see anything which she noticed quite quickly. Encouraged by his curiosity, she continued.

“Here, you connect this star with this one and then you go over there and-” she came closer to him to make sure they were looking into the same direction. “And then you go to this star and-”

“What’s a dipper?” he suddenly asked, reminding her he wasn’t human.

“You are an awful student,” Carol sighed, pointing at a different part of the sky. “You see that W over there?”

She imitated the letter with her fingers so he’d know what a W looks like. He focused on her hands first and then looked back to the sky, slowly nodding.

“You mean those five stars there? That aren’t even connected?”

“Exactly! That’s Cassiopeia.”

“I thought it was a W.”

“No, that’s just the letter it looks similar to.”

She had completely lost him at that point.

“It’s a constellation, which basically figures we see in the night sky when we mentally connect stars that are close to each other. They aren’t based on science or anything but animals, objects or human mythology,” she drew his attention to another one. “The three stars over there belong to Orion and this-”

“Why do you have such things if they aren’t based on science?” he began to understand what she was going on about but it still made no sense to him.

“For fun, I guess,” she shrugged.

Yon-Rogg looked at the line of stars she had pointed at, trying to follow her.

“And _why_ are you showing me this?” he had expected her to go somewhere with this little excurse, either in a helpful-for-their-goal direction or simply in one that would lead to him looking like an idiot somehow. But she didn’t seem to follow a certain plan at all.

“ _Sightseeing_. To show you a part of Earth’s culture,” Carol explained, grinning widely.

“Is that a code for _‘a part of me’_?”

She smiled as she continued walking, still looking up to the stars and not willing to give him an answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Kree admiring Yon-Rogg so much that they salute and bow down to him is canon and mentioned in "Starforce Mission Log" (though the bowing is shown in a picture not actually mentioned in the text)! Which just like the other three official Captain Marvel books I bought also features Yonvers content (thanks Marvel for always pulling through). If you want to check the Yonvers moments out you can do so here: http://judelaw.co/post/183888809380/some-yonvers-stuff-in-starforce-mission-log-that
> 
> Also unrelated but I ordered a Goose (Flerken) Funko Pop over the weekend from a book shop and they actually send me the limited chase edition. I'm never lucky with things like that so I was really surprised and happy!!! She's so cute, I love her ♡


	11. Their Times

“Wanna fight?”

They had been stuck in their motel room for almost two days now, trying to contact Talos who seemed to be inaccessible, waiting for _any_ kind of signal from him. It didn’t worry Carol too much as it often took him a few days to reply to her messages due to the huge distance between them - but of course there always was a little _‘what if something happened to them’_ emerging in the back of her head. She was, however, aware that these thought wouldn’t get her anywhere so she shoved them away, attempting focusing on something else.

With really nothing to do except for persevering they both got bored pretty quickly, dealing with the tedium in their own way. Yon-Rogg, who was used to waiting – thanks to his experience on the battlefield and the countless espionage missions – had a much easier time than Carol, who was all about _doing_ something and not having to await anything at all. While he was meditating, sitting on the floor underneath the window patiently killing time, she had been running around the room, flipping through the TV and constantly looking at the communicator as if checking it every five minutes somehow made Talos reply faster. 

Now, Carol finally had enough of doing nothing so she resorted to her - _their_ most natural way to pass time (though their training had been way more than that of course). She would be lying if she said she didn’t miss their sparring sessions during all those years they spent apart – although the remorse she had felt about the times she had lost her temper and shot Yon-Rogg was completely gone now and had turned into an odd feeling of satisfaction. There had been times when she sent a photon blast at him _just_ to knock that stupid grin of his face, _not_ because she got so angry that she completely lost control over herself and now she was actually kind of proud of that. Looking back it was _exactly_ what he had deserved.

However, she also acknowledged all the benefits she had gotten from Yon-Rogg’s training. Not only did she learn to control her powers – at least most of the time – he had also taught her an endless list of moves that had proven to be extremely useful whenever she got into a situation where she couldn’t use her photon blasts. Not to mention all the different military tactics she had learnt from him as well or the knowledge about the universe in general.

But what she _really_ missed about their times at the gym was the intimacy between them. How the world around them seemed to stop existing whenever the fought, how nothing else matter in that moment except for them and the mat. And, _of course_ , their banter.

Since they had met – or rather the point that Carol had _thought_ was the moment they saw each other for the first time – Yon-Rogg had always been serious. Carol’s – or Vers’ banter was to test his boundaries, how far she could go and what she could get away with which surprisingly was _a lot_. It wasn’t until she caught the faint beginning of a smile on his face that she realized he never reprimanded her because he actually enjoyed the banter, he just didn’t show it. So she had made it her personal mission to make him crack and the victory of seeing him laugh and joke around with her for the first time, felt even greater than when she first managed to knock him down. Over the years Yon-Rogg had started to relent to a point where he not only teased her back but would actually _start_ the banter – even with other members of the Starforce, who most of the time didn’t even realize he was just joking. Carol, however, always knew when he actually meant what he said and when he didn’t. They were so close, knew each other _so_ well that they even understood one another without words, without further explanations. 

They were friends not just team mates and it showed especially in moments like these.

Yet on the mat they were enemies and Yon-Rogg did his best to make the fights as serious as possible to prepare her for the actual battle and prevent her from dying. But as the years went by he couldn’t resist her anymore and Carol liked to think that this banter was _at least_ a small part of the reason they not only trained a lot but also spent so much time together.

And she hoped he had missed their training as well. _Leastwise_ as much as she did, though he deserved to suffer under this longing way more than her.

Yon-Rogg didn’t open his eyes, still meditating and seemed to be somewhere else. It caused her to almost repeat her question but he finally replied: “In this room?”

She rolled on her back, letting her head fall over the edge of the bed looking at the upside down figure of her former mentor: “Yeah. Are you afraid of running into furniture?”

He still didn’t bother to look up.

“I’m afraid of you burning the entire building down because you can’t handle losing to me.”

Turning around again she grabbed one of the pillows and threw it at him. Even though he hadn’t seen the object coming towards him and had no way to prepare himself or to even expect her sneaky attack, he hadn’t flinched at the impact and still didn’t open his eyes.

 _He is good_ , Carol thought, genuinely wondering how he was _that_ much in control of himself.

“I won’t lose,” she finally said as he didn’t bother to react. “Just admit you are scared of me.”

He cracked a smile: “ _I_ can’t lose.”

“Then c’mon,” she threw another pillow at him but this time he opened his eyes catching it and threw it right back at her.

“Alright, annoying child,” he finally gave in. “But _outside_.”

Carol knew he was right. Not because she expected to lose – neither the fight nor her control – but the room was way too small to not accidentally break half of the furnishing, and their budget really wasn’t enough to pay for any possible damage.

The near-by forest wasn’t optimal for sparring but it was the best place they had. It offered enough space and, even more importantly, protection from curious eyes that may have ended up calling the police, seeing to people beating the shit out of each other.

Yon-Rogg yawned and Carol couldn’t tell if he was actually tired – which wouldn’t be too far-fetched considering he didn’t sleep a lot lately and the little sleep he _did_ get was filled with exhausting nightmares – or if he was just being arrogant.

“Let’s raise the stakes a bit,” she said almost as if it was a suggestion though Yon-Rogg immediately knew she had already decided they _will_ do it. “With a bet.”

He was totally unimpressed, slightly raising an eyebrow: “You have never cleared any debts in your life. Making bets with you is completely pointless.”

“I will this time.”

Knowing she wouldn’t give in anyway he waved his hand to admit defeat, signaling her to just say what she wants. She grinned.

“When I win, you will have to apologize to Talos and his family,” he almost twitched at the thought of having to do that - and to a Skrull out of all beings. “And if you win, I will tell you a secret.”

He ignored her specific usage of the words _‘when’_ and _‘if’_ : “How do I know that your secret is of an equal value to my stake?”

“You’ll have to trust me on this.”

Yon-Rogg sighed; he really wasn’t in the mood to bargain with her so he just gave up, confident he’ll win one way or another.

As soon as he showed his wordless approval, she rushed forward to land the first hit, easily getting blocked by Yon as he had already expected her move. She had _always_ been the one who attacked first and he hadn’t presumed it to be any different now. Though it had been years since the last time they had done this, it felt like there had never been an interruption. Quickly finding their old rhythm, they almost danced around each other, always predicting the next move and trying to be one step ahead. Their fights weren’t so much about surprising the other one with an unforeseeable attack; it was about waiting for the opponent to slip for a second, to not pay enough attention and opening a window, a weakness to take advantage of.

They were both smiling involuntary, enjoying every second of it. For a moment it felt like nothing had changed between them, as if she still was Vers and there was no lie separating them, no resentment. This warming feeling of their old friendship overwhelming their hearts, a feeling both of them thought was lost forever once Vers had learnt the truth about her past. The dedication, the trust, the conversance, everything was still there deep down, buried by the perhaps not the lies but the truth, this unstoppable force that had bulldozed their previous lives. Right now nothing of that mattered. Not the lies, the truth, the Skrull or Kree, the Supreme Intelligence or Captain Marvel. It was just them and no one else.

He blocked another kick of hers, sending her back stumbling but she swiftly found her balance again, avoiding the attack that followed. She managed to land a blow as she jumped behind him, a bit too fast for him to react and defend himself. However, he grabbed her hand behind his back, pulled her forward and tried to make her fall but Carol used the momentum to drag him down with her. They got up almost at the same time, starring at each other for a moment. The fight had already lasted for about half an hour now and neither of them had the upper hand. Breathing heavily and quickly wiping the sweat off his forehead, he grinned at her.

“You are not as bad as I remember.”

“And you are not as good as I remember,” Carol replied, attempting another punch to his face.

It was a lie of course; Yon-Rogg had always been a challenge for her – unless she used her powers. _No one_ else managed to demand as much effort from her in combat. It wasn’t that he possessed a ridiculously strength – he still was stronger than the average Kree however not extraordinary compared to other beings in the universe – but he _knew_ her. And he knew how to use his opponent’s weaknesses to his advantage. What Carol had always admired when she was still in the Starforce wasn’t his physical might, she would have rather focused on Bron-Char then, it was his _mind_.

Yon-Rogg hadn’t gotten this far in the Kree military by pure force, it was his quick thinking, his ability to predict his enemy’s movements and immediately recognize their weak point. It’s what he had been trying to teach her, to use her head instead of sheer violence. And even though she didn’t like to admit it as she had constantly scoffed his control-speeches, relying on her mind had saved her life quite a few times, not only in the Starforce but especially as Captain Marvel, when she couldn’t blindly use her photon blasts as it would have risked harming innocent bystanders.

Their fights had always been his mind against her power and he wanted to fight her brain, not her muscles. But what he didn’t consider was that Carol could fight with her head _and_ energy at the same time.

She let her guard down for a brief second, a time window the vast majority of people would have never recognized, but it was enough for Yon-Rogg to not only to discern it but also use it. He aimed for her face to knock her down for good. Expecting him to fall right into her trap, she quickly ducked, punching him square into the guts as she blocked his stretched out arm on her shoulder. She hit him so forcefully he lost balance and to prevent him from catching himself, she had stepped on his foot, pinning it down and making it impossible for him to move.

He hit the ground trying to repel her next blow with his arms, but he was a moment too late and Carol already kneeled on his chest, one knee buried into the crook of his arm, the other held by her hand, a fist right in front of his face.

She had won. For the first time.

They were both breathing heavily, completely exhausted. She still didn’t let go of him, thinking of the of the last time they were on Earth together, when he told her to fight as herself, that she’ll be ready once she can beat him. Back then she hadn’t felt like she had to prove anything to him, and she still didn’t, but it was a great feeling nonetheless to show him she _could_ defeat him in a fair fight.

“ _This_ is that moment,” she lowered her fist, still sitting on him, referring to his ridiculous speech.

He smiled, obviously suppressing a laugh which irritated her.

“I told you _I_ can’t lose,” he sounded amused, happy even.

Carol frowned, expecting him to start another attack to pretend that the fight wasn’t over yet - a ridiculous excuse of his failure that sounded a lot like him - but he didn’t even _try_ to move at all.

And then it hit her, not a blow but the realization which probably was even more intense. Her winning and beating him fair and square was what he had always wanted, what he had been waiting for on Hala and even on Earth. In a way this was a bigger victory for him than just knocking her down could have ever been. She had used her mind to overcome him, had not only followed but implemented his lessons, proving he had been right all along.

He didn’t say it, perhaps not even necessarily thought it right in that moment, but Carol knew he was proud of her. _Incredibly proud_. And even though his entire attitude should annoy her, she couldn’t help but to feel proud of herself too.

Yes, she had told him she didn’t need to prove anything to him. But his approval had been something Vers fought six years for and although she was Carol now, it still felt incredible to finally receive it. She knew she had nothing to substantiate and that his judgement should be completely irrelevant to her.

But it wasn’t.

No matter how much she wanted it to be.

“ _Carol?_ ” he looked at her questioning as she still hadn’t move, pinning him down unnecessarily long. At first he thought she was just living her victory to the fullest but she seemed to be completely lost in thoughts. Right now she suddenly was Vers to him again who didn’t focus on the fight and always had her head elsewhere. It had worried him back then and it still worried now because he knew this state of distraction could get her killed one day.

She still didn’t react so he used the moment of negligence to throw her off, making her fall right next to him.

He had her full attention again and she immediately expected him to give another lecture about never letting your guard down but instead he looked apprehensive. Which was even worse. It had always unsettled her when he should be angry and had nothing but sincere concern in his eyes. His anger was something she could easily brush off but his worry always made her feel like she had truly fucked up.

“You’re alright?”

“Yeah, I was just imaging how _hilarious_ it’ll be to see you apologize to Talos. I should probably record it.”

He was aware that this hadn’t been what Carol thought about but still almost shuddered at the mental image though he somewhat knew he _had_ to do it anyway at some point – even without the bet. That is if Talos _really_ was the person he pretended to be. Carol trusted Talos and therefore he should too – but then again, Carol had also trusted him and that didn’t turn out well for her. Could he really apologize to someone when he wasn’t even sure if he should apologize at all, if he actually had been wrong about him in the first place? If Yon-Rogg could fool Carol for six years who is to say Talos wasn’t couldn’t that too?

It was incredibly hypocritical of him, he _knew_ that, but he would still murder Talos if he was just using Carol’s bonhomie. She deserved much better than that. So much better. Much better than himself too, of course, but right now he wasn’t thinking about that.

“If you never paid your debts why should I?”

“Because unlike you, I _will_ make you pay them,” she clarified despite knowing he was way too honorable to not do it anyway and that he was just bluffing.

Grumbling he stood up, offering a hand to her. He had expected her not to take it, thought that these times were over forever, but she did very enthusiastically and even nearly jumped up. Her smile already annoyed him but what was actually more annoying, was knowing she will tease him about this until he spoke to Talos and then still _continue_ to tease him until like five months afterwards. For this alone he hoped their communicator would soon receive a reply. The sooner he would talk to Talos, the less time she had to taunt him.

As they made their way back into city, both hungry and weary from the fight, Carol kept recommending ways Yon-Rogg could apologize in, each idea getting more ridiculous than the other.

“Maybe you should get him some flowers,” she smiled, already picturing Yon with a bouquet and maybe even a small heart shaped card that went along with it.

“Why would I get him flowers?” he wasn’t playing her game and hadn’t replied to any of her stupid suggestions but this one sincerely confused him.

She forgot he wasn’t human sometimes, not because of his looks but because he felt more like an old friend than an alien: “It’s what we do on Earth. To show how much we care about one another, how much a person means to us. We get each other flowers for special occassions like birthdays, Valentine’s Days, anniversaries, graduations, when we almost killed a man and his refugee family.”

“You tear plants out of the ground and handover their dead form to someone you like to show your devotion?”

“Pretty plants, yes.”

To Yon-Rogg that seemed like a waste of herbs but he figured he should probably stop trying to understand Terrans. There was only one that matter to him anyway and for her he didn’t have to be aware of the C-53 culture.

“Whatever you do,” she now said in a more serious tone. “Don’t half-ass it.”

If he wouldn’t have spent six years with her and by now had at least the beginning of a good Terran vocabulary, he would have had to ask what that means. However, just because he knew what it was, didn’t mean he still wouldn’t try it. He wasn’t convinced they could trust Talos blindly – despite knowing they didn’t really have a choice. What if they would somehow really manage to defeat the Supreme Intelligence and Talos and the other Skrulls would take over Hala? Did Carol seriously know him well enough to be sure this won’t happen? Just because he had turned his back on the Supremor and couldn’t care less what happened to them, didn’t mean he would expose his people to any possible danger, let alone cause it.

He would involve Talos in their plan, it was the only option they had, but he refused to not be wary around him. And to him an apology was almost equal to subordinating himself to a Skrull. He was more than willing to sincerely apologizing to _her_ but he couldn’t do the same for Talos – not now, at least, when he was still scrutinizing his motives.

Carol didn’t care that Yon-Rogg didn’t bother to reply her to ordinance as she knew he’d have to follow it anyway and was _way_ too excited that after three days of denying herself such a luxury, they’d finally get some pizza as revitalization after their training.

And also maybe a little bit as a reward for herself for having beaten him.

Yon-Rogg still had no idea about what pizza was (her description didn’t help either because words like ‘cheese’ or ‘tomato sauce’ meant nothing to him) until they had reached the parlor and Carol pointed at one of the pictures on the outside: “That’s pizza.”

“That one?” he was pointing at one of five different pictures, unsure about which she was talking.

“All of them are. They just have a different topping,” she explained, wondering how he could be so dense sometimes.

He looked at the menu and saw that the place was offering the same meal twenty-eight times just slightly different and now really completely gave up on his anthropology.

“Which one do you want?”

“How would I know? Just order anything.”

She considered to get something hurtfully spicy for him but figured he would already suffer enough apologizing to Talos so she settled on something she, judging by the six years she had spent with him, sincerely thought he would like.

Just in case Talos would end up calling them and they would have to talk to an alien hologram, they took their pizzas back to the motel room instead of sitting down, which Carol regret a lot. She hadn’t eaten pizza in ages but it had been even longer that she actually sat down in a restaurant eating peacefully and just enjoying the moment.

However, she didn’t let this befuddle her excitement. Once at the motel, she immediately jumped on the bed, almost tearing the cardboard open, loudly moaning as she took her first bite. Yon-Rogg didn’t understand how anyone could be so excited about food – for him it was just a simple necessity to function and survive – but seeing her this cheerful somehow made him happy too.

He took a more civilized approach of sitting down on the bed, carefully taking his first bite. It was surprisingly good, something he wouldn’t admit to her as his Kree arrogance was still anchored deeply in his mind.

“How ‘s taste?”  she asked, her mouth half full causing Yon-Rogg to frown, before she swallowed and continued. “Good, huh?”

“It’s alright.”

“Pfff, _alright_? Try mine.”

She held the slice she was holding out to him and without any hesitation he tried it, grinning afterwards.

“This one is even worse.”

“Oh, shut up,” she rolled her eyes at his refusal to admit humans actually had some pretty great things although in this case she knew he was just kidding.

“If I shut my mouth, I can’t eat anymore.”

“More pizza for me then.”

“There is no way you can eat two of these.”

“Wanna find out?”

He really considered it for a moment. Training Vers for so many years had taught him that it’s usually the best option to let her try something she was _convinced_ she could do which he _knew_ she wasn’t capable of – failure was the best teacher after all. But his hunger reminded him he really should keep his pizza for himself. Shaking his head he continued eating, watching her as she ate at probably three times the speed he did.

“If you don’t eat faster, it’ll be cold when you are not even halfway through,” Carol almost sounded motherly concerned.

“I have a living heater sitting next to me, I think I’ll be fine,” he said carelessly and she decided to just burn it if he actually had the _audacity_ to ask her to heat up his pizza.

She was just getting to her fourth slice when the communicator that was lying in front of her lit up and started to form the hologram of a Skrull. It flickered a lot, implying the connection was very instable, Talos really must be far away from them, quite possibly in a completely different galaxy.

Thought the three-dimensional image was lacking, Carol could tell he was smiling, which fully erased her earlier worries.

“Carol?” even the audio was distorted.

She didn’t bother to put the pizza away, no matter how happy she was to see him: “Talos! Is everything alright? I’ve been trying to contact you for ages.”

Saying _‘we’_ would have been like a bull at a gate. When placing the devise on the bed earlier, she had deliberately turned it in a way that would prevent Talos from seeing anyone but her and although she hadn’t talked with Yon-Rogg about this prior, she expected him to be clever enough to not say anything and give away his presence.

Carol didn’t want to deceive him like this but also couldn’t think of a different way to handle this. There was no way for her to predict if Talos would still be willing to listen, let alone meet-up, if he knew about Yon-Rogg beforehand and her former commander was right – they _needed_ Talos for this plan to work. He’d hopefully forgive for this chicanery later on.

“Ages? I don’t know on what planet you are on but it had only been 15 hours here.”

It was 38 hours for Earth but just as Yon-Rogg Talos didn’t really understand human hyperboles.

“What took you so long?” she asked, taking another bite as she wasn’t willing to go over figure of speeches with him right now.

“The usual rebuilding civilization duties,” he explained. “With a few parental tasks here and there.”

“How’s Rhena?” Carol missed the little girl a lot. When she was helping the Skrull find a new home, they had spent a lot of time together and grown really close. Saying goodbye once they had finally settled on a habitable planet had been incredibly hard and since then Carol tried to keep up with her and her development as often as possible.

Both Monica and Rhena were like nieces to her and not being able to watch them grow up made her feel like she was missing something in her life. _A family_. Yes, she had Maria and Monica and to an extend even Talos’ family and she appreciated every single moment she had with them but the nature of her job, if one wants to call it that, made it impossible for her to stay long enough at one place to really feel like she was a part of their lives, like she belonged _somewhere_.

She often wondered if they were missing her as much as she missed them or if they just moved on with their normal lives like nothing had changed. Hopefully it was the latter. She didn’t want anyone to be as yearning as she was – it only made one feel more alone than they actually were.

“She’s eagerly practicing her sim skills and I couldn’t be prouder of her.”

Yon-Rogg quietly listened as the conversation took place, wondering how Carol could waste so much precious time. It wasn’t like he didn’t _want_ her to catch with people she considered to be her friends – though he may have been _a little bit_ jealous of all the time Talos got to spent with her during the years Yon-Rogg couldn’t even see her from a distance – but his main concern was the unsteady connection that could break down any minute. Who knew when they would get a strong enough signal again? He really didn’t want to waste any more days by doing nothing.

“But did you really just call to ask how things are going?” Talos asked, sensing there was more to her attempts to reach him.

Carol shook her head.

“No, I’m planning something I need your help with. If you want to help.”

“We owe you a lot, Carol,” he was sincere, or at least sounded like he was, to Yon’s surprise. “Whatever it is I’ll be glad to do everything that’s within my power.”

“I’m afraid I neither can nor want to go over the details with you this way. Could you take a break from your chieftain duties and visit me on Earth?”

She felt guilty asking so much of Talos without even giving him a concrete reason but he didn’t seem to mind at all.

“Of course. It’ll take a while, though. We are not really around the corner,” it was an expression he had picked up from Carol. “Soren and Rhena will be happy to see you again.”

“No!” Carol almost cried out so suddenly that even Yon-Rogg was taken aback. “No. Come alone – or rather only with people you trust and who can defend themselves.”

Enough innocent people had died because of her, because they were just _around_ her. She tried not to think too much about the group of refugees she had promised a safe new home to as she knew constantly beating herself up about it wouldn’t help anyone. It was one of the rare moments in which she was almost thankful for the emotional control lessons the Kree had hammered into her head, not because she generally approved of the concept but because right now she had to focus on defeating the Supreme Intelligence. In this case her emotions really would serve the enemy. And also it sometimes was just so much easier and more comfortable to run away this overwhelming guilt.

Talos held on for a moment but then nodded: “Are we dealing with Kree or something else?”

“Kree,” she admitted. “But we also have one on our side,” she tried to very slowly get him used to the idea of working with Yon-Rogg. It would be hard for both of them to put their differences and even racism aside to work together and she hoped that at least one of them wouldn’t put up _that_ much of a fight. Though right now she really didn’t know who could be that one.

“You know that you cannot trust them,” he replied almost in a reprimanded manner.

Yon-Rogg immediately was offended by that statement – even though he was aware that in this particular case Talos wasn’t even completely wrong, but generally speaking if there was one species you couldn’t trust it clearly were the shapeshifters not the Kree.

Carol grinned, resisting the urge to look over to Yon: “I know they are horrible. Without _any_ exception.”

He glared at her but thankfully had enough self-control to still not say anything.

Carol still smiled but softer now, adding: “But we can really trust this one. He is… my friend.”

Yon was fully aware she clearly didn’t actually mean that and was only using the word due to a lack of better expressions, but he still abruptly forgot any annoyance and anger he had felt before.

“Just don’t trust them _too_ much,” Talos warned, knowing he couldn’t change her mind anyway.

The connection started to get even worse and they quickly agreed on him contacting her once they’re close enough to Earth so she could return to her ship and meet him in space. A little bit of math and she figured it would take him about five Earth days to reach them. More time of having nothing to do but somehow the thought of having to spend this time with Yon-Rogg made the situation more bearable. Which irritated her _a lot._ She should be angry and annoyed, not look _forward_ to more hours of boredom with him.

When the call ended Carol’s attention returned to her now sadly cold pizza – a fact she normally would have just accepted if she wouldn’t have remembered what Yon-Rogg had said earlier. She often forgot she could easily use her powers to help herself out in her everyday life, partly because the Kree had taught her the photon energy was something sacred and shouldn’t be abused like that and partly because to herself she was still just Carol and not an overly powerful being that could probably destroy an entire planet if she tried hard enough.

She waited for Yon-Rogg to complain and ask (or even tell) her to warm up his pizza too but he either was too proud for that or really didn’t mind eating cooled off food.

Carol hesitated for a moment as she watched him eat but then gave in with a shy. She didn’t even knew who she was giving in to, Yon-Rogg who hadn’t said anything or her own feelings that she so desperately tried to ignore as they completely betrayed her, but she did it anyway.

Yon-Rogg started to protest when she grabbed his pizza box (without actually doing anything against it) but quickly shut up when he saw what she was doing.

“Thank you?” he slowly said, unsure of why she had done this and almost expecting some kind of trap that never came.

They were eating in silence, both preoccupied with their own thoughts. Five more days of just sitting around in this dirty motel room, eating junk food and watching TV should sound awful but it didn’t.  Carol realized she hadn’t felt this burning feeling of loneliness, which had been her constant companion for the past few years while she was roaming around the universe saving lives, for the past couple of days. Its absence was quiet and nothing one could really become aware of unless they focused on it.

As Vers on Hala she had often felt alone and completely lost – but never when she was around Yon-Rogg. His friendship not only distracted her from these thoughts – it completely erased them as they got replaced by a sense of belonging, of significance, almost love even.

Things were so different between them now and yet it felt like nothing had changed.

Not only wasn’t she alone anymore – she also didn’t _feel_ like she was.

And she knew she shouldn’t have these thought, that she should just hate him with every fiber of her being and not let herself get blinded by pity or whatever it was that she felt. That she should only consider him useful to stop the Supreme Intelligence. He had lied to her for six years and then lied again recently – seeing him question his entire life and having nightmares really shouldn’t hurt her. It was a deserved punishment. She had every right to be happy about his misery.

But then she remembered how he always opened his door no matter what time it was, how he would smile at her whenever she teased him and how he constantly tried to make her see she even was a great warrior _without_ her powers – something she hadn’t understood at that time but slowly began to now.

She should hate him for the lies he had _told_ her instead of focusing on all the truths he had _shown_ her.

But she just couldn’t.

And she even started to dread the day they would end the war and go separate ways.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As far as I'm aware Talos' daughter doesn't have an official name so I named her Rhena. If we get her actual name one day, I'll go back an change it.


	12. The Nights

_She didn’t know when the dreams had started –_ couldn’t _know as she didn’t remember her life before Hala. But regardless if the nightmares had always been her company at night or not, they certainly were now and there was nothing she could do to stop them._

_They had pills that would make you fall asleep quicker, pills against any kind of pain, pills that could be used to receive nutrients from sources other than from food. But there were no pills against nightmares._

_Nothing could stop them from entering her mind at night, confusing and scaring her – except for not getting any sleep at all. However sleep was something she needed. She needed to rest, especially before and after missions yet at some point in her life sleep had become anything_ but _calming. It was stressful, frightening and much worse than being tired._

_She hoped that physical exhaustion would not only distract her from the nightmares (or memories?) she was running from but also make her tired enough to ensure a dreamless night – or day, depending on what time she woke up. But no matter how much she ran, how fast she was, she could never escape them._

_At least not until Yon-Rogg helped her._

_One early morning after having run for several hours already, she suddenly found herself in front of his door. They had a good relationship and he was certainly the closest thing she had to a friend but Vers still didn’t know if she could come to him for shelter, for comfort. Her training to become a member of the Starforce team had already started and there was nothing she wanted more than being a part of them and protect the Kree, so that none of them will ever have to experience what she had gone through (whatever exactly that was). However the fear Yon-Rogg would think of her as weak for not being in control of herself and letting simple dreams get to her like this was almost unbearable. What if he wouldn’t let her join his team, wouldn’t want someone this pathetic in it?_

_He was the only person on the entire planet that seemed to care about her, who not only saved her life but also made it his personal assignment to train and guide her, who spend time with her, who showed her this new (or old?) world she was living in. Becoming a member of the Starforce was what kept her going and something to look forward to. A purpose. If she wouldn’t be allowed to join them, what else could she do? She knew nobody on this planet, had no qualifications - or perhaps she did but couldn’t remember._

_And she wanted to prove herself to Yon-Rogg, to show him his sacrifice – both of his blood and time – had been worth it. She didn’t want to disappoint him by making him think he had resurrected a fragile mistake._

_But despite her trepidation and worries she still found the courage in her to knock and was forever glad she did._

_Yon-Rogg reacted nothing like she expected or feared, he actually seemed concerned, telling her she should have come sooner – not in an angry but a caring tone. He asked her to come inside, to tell him about her dreams and what as so scary about them and it felt so good to finally be able to talk with someone, to know she had_ someone _who would listen._

_All his words, no matter how supportive and encouraging, however could not make her dreams ago away. She still had them and feared she would forever. She feared that she could never escape, that sleep would always be a torture._

_But one day Yon-Rogg suggested they could train together whenever she needed him in such nights._

_And he took her to the gym, not the military gyms but the one from his childhood at the bottom of lower Hala where he had never taken anyone – something Vers took a lot of pride in. She mattered to him, maybe even as much as he matter to her. Their training would become a habit and almost completely replaced the talking, though Yon-Rogg would still occasionally ask about them during their sparring and she knew that if she_ had _to talk about them again he’d always listen._

_The training never warded her from the nightmares but it sometimes resulted in exhaustion. Exhaustion that would make her fall asleep whenever they sat down on the public transport back to the military base, no dreams just a deep sleep. Her head usually rested on his shoulder, nothing she did consciously it was simply the position she ended up sleeping in, and he’d stay very still until they reached their station. Yon-Rogg was glad to see her finally getting some rest and would never disturb her no matter how uncomfortable the position was for him. The first few times it had happened, she had apologized – not only for sleeping on his shoulder but for having fallen asleep at all. It was a sign of weakness to let your guard down like this, she knew that._

_But he never complained and then came a day when she had just stopped even mentioning it._

_Her knocking on his door, disturbing his sleep, them running together to the station simply because Vers liked running so much, taking the public transport and go to his old gym, training, mocking one another and then her finally giving in to her hurting body and finding some rest sitting next to him – all of this had become a part of their weekly, sometimes even daily life. And neither complained about it (at least not seriously)._

_It had become so normal to her that once she had recovered her memories and was Carol again (a new Carol as the old one, just like Vers, was still a part of her yet gone forever) she still sometimes woke up at night, around the time she’d usually wake up from her nightmares. Dreams didn’t wake her, it was her body, her inner clock, telling her to get up and go to Yon-Rogg. She didn’t need him anymore even if she_ still had _bad dreams but something in her seemed to miss their time together._

Carol knew those days were over and would never return – and she was right. Even now that she was reunited with Yon-Rogg in a way, she still didn’t need his comfort and shelter. Didn’t need to hear reassuring words or get exhausted already before dawn. But what she had never expected was that one day their roles would be reversed.

Yon-Rogg hadn’t been sleeping well since they arrived on Earth, or perhaps before that point but she wouldn’t be able to tell. He would spend his nights turning from one side to another in complete distress, trapped in his dreams. Sometimes they would wake him up, breathing heavily, looking around to reassure himself where he was and Carol always pretended to be fast asleep although his movements had woken her up much earlier.

She ignored his nightmares, pretended she didn’t know about them. Not because she didn’t care, because she wanted him to suffer from them but because she knew Yon wouldn’t accept her help – or the little comfort she could offer – anyway.

Carol would have never thought he could have nightmares as well. Of course she was aware of his _capabilities_ to have bad dreams but their relationship had always about _him_ taking care of _her_ so seeing him suddenly being the one in need of solace was a weird and new concept for her.

It was almost ironic, really, that on _his_ home planet she was the one with the nightmares and now on _her_ home planet it was the other way around. But she knew how horrible dreams could be and how frightening it could get to go to sleep, to let go of your consciousness on purpose, giving your sub- consciousness full control over your head.

So on the fifth day on Earth she finally had enough.

_“Yon?”_ she gently shook his shoulder, trying to not startle him too much but his warrior instincts immediately took over, making him grab her hand and forcefully turn around. “It’s me.”

He quickly let go of her, calming down as he realized there wasn’t any danger. He seemed confused though, looking over to their window into the night, wondering why she had woken him up.

“You had a bad dream,” Carol explained as an answer to his puzzled expression that quickly changed into vexation.

“I’m fine,” he simply stated lying down again and turning away from her.

She contemplated to just drop it, to wait for him to come to her for help. However, knowing Yon-Rogg he would rather die than reaching out to anyone. A part of her was convinced she _had_ to help him for the sole reason he had helped her too on Hala, an argument that quickly got countered by the realization that after he had lied to her for so many years, she didn’t owe him anything – not even for the things he had clearly done just because he wanted to, that didn’t serve any Kree or Supreme Intelligence scheme, and solely existed to help her.

So she lied to herself, reasoned that his exhaustion and restlessness were endangering their plan and that she therefore needed to find a way to support him. It wasn’t a good lie but she attempted to believe in it.

“I guess whining like a baby in your sleep is normal for you then.”

If she was dealing with anyone else insulting would have been the last thing she tried (if at all) but she _knew_ Yon-Rogg. She _knew_ he would fall for her banter despite knowing she was just joking, he always did. Yon turned around a bit to look at her over his shoulder with grave eyes.

“I’m not _whining_.”

“ _Weeping_ like a baby then?” she asked almost innocently.

He growled and faced the wall again instead of her, pulling their blanket over his shoulder.

“I take that as a yes.”

_“Carol,”_ he warned. “I’m trying to sleep.”

“Me too but you are moving so much that it gets really hard.”

He sighed and stood up, taking his pillow with him as he lied down on the floor, still starring at the wall. Carol crawled over onto his side of the bed and looked down at him.

“This wasn’t what I meant, Yon-Rogg.”

“Can’t you just leave me alone?” it sounded more like an order than a question. She knew it would be hard to convince him to open up to her but not that he even refused to admit he was having nightmares to begin with.

She knew why, of course. Not only because she knew him so well but because she had been in the same situation when she had stood in front of his door. Yon-Rogg never made her feel like asking for help was a weakness, in fact even encouraged her to approach him whenever she had any questions or didn’t know how something worked but she had still gotten into this mindset.

Admitting something that wasn’t even real and only excited in your head was bothering you and even _scaring_ you was hard. An open flesh wound while painful was at least visible and awoke more understanding from others. But dreams were something your mind came up with, it was out of your control, yes, but it still felt like your own fault. Asking for help was not only acknowledging to others you were unable to deal with something on your own, it was also admitting it to yourself, which probably was the hardest part. Lying and pretending everything was alright and that those dreams didn’t bother you was _much_ easier than admitting you were too weak to fight them. _Too scared_.

Neither of them wanted to do that.

However, Carol _had_ done it, had asked for his help and now she would help him too whether he would come to her or not.

“Tell me about your dream.”

Yon-Rogg groaned recognizing himself in her. He knew Carol just wanted to help but he didn’t _need_ any help. Nightmares were nothing new to him; they were pretty much bound to happen when you are at war. Lying to Vers for six years despite knowing it was for the good of the Kree had also brought him a fair share of bad dreams. And he had _always_ survived and withstood all of them. Granted they had never been this frequent or had felt so real before but he knew they would go away, they _had_ to.

“I always dream an obnoxious woman wakes me up and ruins my sleep schedule, _it’s horrifying_.”

He couldn’t see her but knew she rolled her eyes at him.

“Don’t make me force you,” she threated, making her fist glow up. Carol didn’t want to use violence and she wouldn’t but _he_ didn’t have to know that – she didn’t know how else she could get him to open up. Yon-Rogg would dismiss everything she said and she probably would have too if she didn’t reach out to him in the first place. However, it had taken her weeks to reach this low point and letting him go there as well would be unjustifiable.

Now in the light she actually got to take a look at him. He looked horrible. The lack of sleep and exhaustion through the dreams really started to take a toll on his face.

Yon-Rogg calmly looked at her fist and then into her eyes raising an eyebrow. It obviously didn’t work at all. His expression dared her to shoot at him causing her to lower her hand again. Satisfied with his victory he turned around, closing his eyes trying to sleep but Carol had one last ace up her sleeve.

“I’m worried about you.”

He held still for a moment but then groaned, rubbing his eyes with one hand as if he had a headache. And in a way she really felt like one.

“I’m fine, _Carol_.”

However, realizing she would be way too stubborn to give in, he finally sighed and sat up, leaning his back against the bed frame: “What do you want me to say?”

“I know that sounds crazy considering I’m talking to you but _the truth_.”

Now it was his turn to roll his eyes.

“Alright, I sometimes have nightmares,” he was still avoiding to talk about the content of them but also didn’t know how detailed Carol wanted him to be, so he tried to say as little as possible, hoping that would satisfy her.

It didn’t of course.

“Tell me about them.”

“They are nightmarish.”

_“Yon-Rogg,”_ he was really testing her patience. “You said yourself that talking about them help.”

“I was obviously wrong. It didn’t help you, did it?” he almost laughed.

“It didn’t make them go away, no,” she admitted as she got off the bed and sat down next to him. “But it made me feel less alone.”

Yon-Rogg didn’t look at her, his eyes fixed on the starry night outside their window, recognizing the Big Dipper. He didn’t say anything and Carol let him think for a moment, waiting for him to reach out to her. She had him and she knew that.

“It’s always a different dream. Sometimes I’m fighting alongside the Supreme Intelligence, killing Skrulls left and right. Sometimes you fight alongside them so the Skrull win. You kill me. And honestly those would actually be alright if the Skrull wouldn’t go on to murder every Kree within their path, even or maybe especially if they are still just a child… And sometimes, sometimes we are both fighting the Supreme Intelligence together and,” he stopped for a moment, breathing heavily. “I decide to kill _you_ instead.”

_“You were the one who started her life and now have to be the one to end it,”_ the Supremor’s voice echoed through his head.

All of his dreams were horrifying in their own right but the last one had always been the worst _. By far._ Even when he had still been on the Intelligence’s side he knew he could never kill her; they _both_ knew it, which is why it had taken them so long to finally give him the order.

It had been a test. A test he volitionally failed.

He knew he could never seriously harm her. He had known it since the moment they had meet on this very planet. Yon-Rogg never understood _why_ he had been so hell-bend on saving Vers to a point of risking his own life without even knowing her.  She wasn’t a Kree – at least hadn’t been back then – and yet he had done everything within his power to save this Terran’s life. The very same person who had made his own more complicated by not giving in and shooting the drive instead.

Through the years she had grown even closer to him, never making him regret his decision to save and take care of her. He knew he wouldn’t betray her and that he could _never_ kill her, not only because she was stronger than him but simply because he just wasn’t capable of it. And he didn’t _want_ to be capable of it.

So why did these dreams scare him so much?

Why was he so afraid of _himself_?

_Of what he_ could _do?_

Carol drew her knees closer and leaned her chin on them as she looked with him out of the window into the sky.

“There was a time after I sent you back to Hala when I had a similar dream,” she quietly said. “In which I would kill you in that desert.”

Yon-Rogg smiled slightly: “Regretting not having done it?”

He was partly joking but Carol’s face didn’t change as she still watched the night go by.

“I was so angry. About all the lies, that the one person I trusted the most had _defrauded_ me like this. I was so overwhelmed by  _hatred_ , _confusion_ , was _so hurt_ that I couldn’t control myself. You would never defend yourself, sometimes smile even, and I just… _murdered_ you,” her voice was dry. “This wasn’t who I wanted to be yet I knew it _was_ a part of me, that it _was_ me in a way although I haven’t done it – and it _scared_ me.”

Yon looked at her in surprise.

“How did you make them stop?”

She shrugged slightly: “Over the years, I learnt to accept that this… out of control part would always be in me. And when I finally admitted that to myself, it made working on it so much easier or maybe even possible to begin with. I don’t know… I think I realized that just because I’m _technically_ capable of doing something doesn’t mean I will _actually_ do it. That even if I’m _able_ to be a monster, I don’t _have to be_ one. Ever.”

“You still beat me up when we met again.”

“Yeah, but I _didn’t_ kill you,” she replied with a smug grin on her lips.

They sat together for a while; neither of them saying a word as the night slowly yielded the morning and the stars faded into the bright blue of a new day.

Perhaps she was right, perhaps he _should_ trust himself more, should know that just because he betrayed her in the past and was _able_ to do it again didn’t mean he _would_ do it. He was stronger than that.

The Supreme Intelligence didn’t have any power over him anymore, he had beaten them.

He _knew_ that.

“Thank you,” he finally said standing up to get dressed. It was his turn to get them breakfast.

She grinned as she watched him put on his shoes and walk over to the other end of the room: “For punching you or for not having taken your life?”

Yon-Rogg held on for a moment, thinking about the answer he wasn’t sure about himself before opening the door and not looking back at her.

“Saving me.”

The door click shut and as he made his way down the street and she stayed in their room neither of them really knew if he was talking about the escape from his captors or the just bygone night.


	13. Her Fear

Eight more days they had spent on Earth. Eight days filled with being cramped together in this tiny motel room, Carol watching TV and Yon-Rogg meditating, when they weren’t outside, walking through the small city to the near-by forest to catch up to their sparring.

Sparring that usually ended in a draw as both of them refused to give up and admit to their defeat, especially since neither of them ever had the upper hand.  
They’d pass their entire afternoon in the woods, beating each other up until they agreed on taking a _break_ and adjourn the continuation of their fight to the next day, refusing to actually call their draw a draw.

Eight more days of Carol reassuring Maria that everything was fine and refusing to accept her request of meeting her alone - despite Yon-Rogg constantly insisting it was fine and offering to just stay at the motel waiting for her return.

Carol always insisted it was too dangerous, too risky to split up as they could never know if the Kree would find them – perhaps they had even tracked and listened to her conversation with Talos – and as true and honest as that worry might have been, in reality she was more afraid of giving Yon-Rogg too much room, giving him the chance to decide on leaving.

She was aware he didn’t _need_ to be apart from her for rethinking, that he could very well reconsider their alliance while mediating or lying in bed or while literally sitting next to her eating. But instead of accepting she wouldn’t be able to prevent this fate if it was to be theirs, she kept trying to distract him all the time, annoying him if necessary. Annoyance with her meant he at least still cared.

It wasn’t like she didn’t trust him, yes, she was _still_ a bit wary perhaps but she thought that this time he _really_ had changed his mind, _really_ wanted to help her end the war.  Yes, his loyalty still lay with the Kree but he wasn’t loyal to the Supreme Intelligence anymore. He had seen what the Empire did, discerned their lies, the propaganda. He hadn’t suddenly changed his values as Maria liked to think, he just realized he’s been blind to the true nature of the Kree goals all his life. She knew all of that and therefore it didn’t worry her.

No, what really made her afraid of him leaving was _losing_ him. Being all alone again. She had grown so used to his company over the six years on Hala that it had been a nightmare to suddenly live without it once she learnt the truth – even though she was mad with him beyond belief. Now that she felt like she had an excuse to condone him, not forget it but actually _forgive_ him, abruptly living without him would be even worse than it had been the first time. She couldn’t pretend anymore she was better off without him because she _knew_ she just wasn’t.

Carol didn’t want to lose their training, their banter, even sleeping in the same room suddenly felt so natural, so familiar. Giving him an opportunity to leave was out of the question. After all, she couldn’t be sure, and certainly wasn’t, he was feeling even remotely the same as she did.

Eight more days Maria had argued with her until in the morning of their ninth and last day on Earth, after Carol had told her she’ll leave and meet Talos that night, Maria had finally given in.

“Come over to have some barbecue to say goodbye before you fuck off for another few years making me and Monica miss you terribly.”

“You know I can’t do that,” Carol replied, guilt rising in her as she knew her answer would hurt both of them.

“Bring him along, I don’t care. Just tell him to not try anything.”

Carol was puzzled: “You sure?”

“If enduring him is the price I have to pay to see you so be it.”

She couldn’t be happier, smiling brightly and completely ignoring the feeling of culpability over the sacrifice her friend was making.

“I’d make him serve us but he’d probably burn all our food.”

“I wouldn’t let him near my food anyway,” Maria grumbled on the other side of the line, reminding her how uncomfortable it made her to have Yon-Rogg around.

For a moment she did consider offering to come alone as she was feeling awful about making her best friend go through this pretty much against her will, but she could technically visit Maria and Monica all the time while Yon-Rogg might, _will_ leave her forever soon. She could make it up to her another time.

“He won’t do anything, I promise,” she reassured her. “He hasn’t strangled me in my sleep yet either.”

“I hope you lock the damn door anyway,” Maria pleaded, knowing Carol absolutely didn’t do that.

“That’s a bit hard sleeping in the same bed together.”

“ _Carol_ …”

“Not like _that_.”

“I know,” Maria sighed though at this point she actually _didn’t_ know anymore. “But just because you are probably the most powerful being in the universe doesn’t mean you need to be _this_ imprudent.”

“I’m not,” Carol protested. “Besides, imprudently helping Dr. Lawson is what has end up making me the most powerful being in the universe.”

Knowing there was no use in further arguing with her, Maria only continued to tell her the time she could come over, hanging up to help Monica with her homework – or in this case make her do it at all.

Carol was pretty satisfied with herself, ignoring the small and resistant guilt in the back of her head, informing Yon about their new afternoon plans.

“What’s a barbecue?” he was carefully folding the clothes they slept in as Carol never bothered to take care of hers and he couldn’t stand her disarray. She had given up on telling him to stop doing that on day four.

“It pretty much just means to cook meet or fish or vegetables or whatever on a grill,” she explained, realizing he probably didn’t know what a grill was either. “Basically over open fire. You’ll understand when we get there.”

He stored the clothes in the bag Carol had brought before raising an eyebrow at her: “And she _really_ is alright with me coming along?”

Carol grimaced awkwardly: “ _Alright_ wouldn’t be the term I’d use but she’ll tolerate it.”

Yon-Rogg knew it meant a lot to Carol to see her friend once more before they’d leave which is why he had offered several times to just stay behind. The thought of having to meet Maria again wasn’t appealing for him at all, he’d rather spent the afternoon with training or meditating or literally doing _anything_ else but Carol was so happy about the entire affair that it was impossible for him to turn her down.

As expected, Maria greeted Carol with a warm hug and basically paid no attention to Yon-Rogg except for a quick, warning glance in his direction. He had decided to simply ignore her too which was working well enough. Monica, however, was quite persistent in gaining his attention whenever her mom was out of hearing range.  
It wasn’t like Yon wasn’t used to children approaching him and asking all sorts of questions, it had happened to him fairly often on Hala and he was always happy to comply. But Hala children’s questions were all focused on Skrulls and the war, he never had to explain to them what Kree eat or what they are doing in their free time or whatever, to him trivial, thing to ask about she would come up with.

“Do you have TV?” she asked when Maria went back inside to get more sausages.

“No,” Yon-Rogg had watched some television shows with Carol at the motel but he still didn’t understand the appeal of it. Watching fictional stories on a backward screen seemed like a huge waste of time and resources to him - especially when the stories she was watching would only make her scream at the film, as if the characters could hear her, instead of teaching her anything of value.

The barbeque itself went by rather quickly but since they still had a few hours left, Maria let both of them stay for the rest of the evening. It felt good to talk about the old times with her best friend again, times in which they both were just normal, young women and not _one_ normal, slightly older now woman and one superhero. It was almost possible to pretend that Yon-Rogg wasn’t there, that it was just the three of them as it had always been, if her daughter wouldn’t have grown braver as the evening went by and now even talked to him when Maria was sitting right next to her.

“Books?”

“We don’t need to press letters onto some kind of thin sheet to read them; we can simply use what you’d probably describe as some kind of projection on a device for this.”

“That’s damn cool-“

“ _Monica_ ,” Maria warned her daughter, standing up to get another drink. She didn’t like the sudden interested of her in Yon-Rogg at all. Carol’s naïve, forgiving nature was already worse enough; she really didn’t need to deal with her daughter thinking this guy or his people were cool.

Monica muttered something under her breath, looking over to Carol for help. During the years they lived and basically raised Monica together, Carol had never questions her friend’s parenting but back then and still now it was hard not to side with Monica whenever she used that look on her.

Carol sighed, nodding slightly as she stood up as well and walked over to her friend to wrap an arm around her shoulders, obviously planning to follow her.

Maria gave her the same warning glace she had given her daughter, unwilling to leave Monica and Yon-Rogg alone and while Carol didn’t enjoy stabbing her friend in the back like this, she knew Yon was of absolutely no danger for Monica and if anything the situation would be much awful and annoying for _him_ , having to reply to all of her questions.

“Trust me,” Carol whispered and Monica hesitated before finally giving in. She _didn’t_ trust in her friend in her judgement of Yon-Rogg when it came to his sudden change of heart regarding the Skrull but she _did_ know Carol would never endanger Monica in any way and if she was absolutely sure Yon-Rogg wouldn’t harm her, she must be right.

In the kitchen, Maria even was relieved to have a moment with Carol alone as it now gave her some time to plainly ask Carol what she’d been wondering about for over a week now without having to fear Monica could eavesdrop.

“What’s the deal with you and Yon-Rogg?” she crossed her arms leaning against the kitchen counter, watching her friend sternly.

Carol shrugged getting another beer out of the fridge: “He’ll be a great help to finally end the war between the Skrull and Kree.”

“That’s not what I mean. What is he _for you_?”

“We are not dating if that’s what you are trying to imply,” Maria’s tone started to annoy her. She wasn’t even mad with her per se, she was actually mad with herself. Maria embodied all of Carol’s doubts and worries regarding Yon-Rogg and their relationship and unlike herself wasn’t afraid to voice them.

“Yet you are sleeping in the same bed.”

Carol knew she wouldn’t let _this_ go so easily.

“It’s not like we had a big budget,” she rolled her eyes. “If you are _that_ worried, you could just let us stay at your place next time.”

She wasn’t serious, especially considering she didn’t expect there to be a next time she and Yon-Rogg would be on Earth together but despite her sarcasm Maria just couldn’t pretend Carol’s behavior wasn’t alarming to her.

“Alright, so nothing happened here _on Earth_ ,” the way she accentuated the location made it easy for Carol to guess what she’d ask next.

“Nothing happened on Hala either.”

“But you _wanted_ something to happen,” Maria knew her friend, sometimes even better than Carol knew herself. Her tone and body language were more defensive than joking now, telling her she definitely was on the right track.

“No,” Carol replied firmly. Monica really owed her something for distracting Maria like this.

“Why not?” she refused to let this slide. “You had lost your memory, were on a foreign planet knowing nobody, all alone. It would be quite natural to fall for the man you spent so much time with for six years. Especially when you weren’t aware he is actually an asshole.”

“He isn’t-” Carol has stopped herself from defending him but it was too late - Maria already had her exactly where she wanted her to be. Or rather where she had _expected_ her to be, she didn’t _want_ her there at all.

“ _Carol.”_

“Okay, fine,” she quickly looked over her shoulder to make sure Yon-Rogg was still outside. He didn’t need to hear this; it would only be a perfect piece of information to tease her with. And he didn’t deserve that power. “I may have had a very _small_ crush on him at some point. Are you happy now?”

It was quite the opposite actually.

“ _Had?_ ”

“Yes,” she insisted. “ _Had._ ”

“Listen,” Maria stepped forward, taking her hand. “Just be careful, okay? You _can’t_ trust him. And even if you could, he wouldn’t deserve you, not after everything he has done.”

Carol knew she only meant well but something about the way she had said it made her blood boil. Maria acted as if she had such a wide range of potential partners to choose from, when in reality the pool of people that had the time and opportunity to travel with her around the universe, didn’t mind her ‘job’ and powers and had a lifespan that was at least similar to hers, was extremely narrow. Not that she _needed_ anyone, of course. Especially not Yon-Rogg.

But it would still be nice to have someone. To not be alone.

Perhaps she should just get a pet.

Swallowing her emotions in a way that would make Yon proud, which was the most annoying part of this, she smiled at Maria: “Don’t worry. He’s just a means to the end.”

Her friend wasn’t quite convinced but followed her back outside again without questioning her any further, realizing how futile it was to talk about this.

And that just in time.

“Leave her the fuck alone,” infuriated Maria ran towards Yon-Rogg and Monica who had left the porch and were now standing a few feet away from it. He was holding her arm behind her back, slowly letting go of the teenager as her mother was coming closer. Unlike the raging parent, Carol wasn’t worried at all. She had recognized the position; it was exactly how he would hold her when he taught her how to get out of such a grip. And judging by Monica’s face and overall state Yon-Rogg knew he couldn’t be as harsh to her as he had always been with Carol back then.

“He’s just teaching me some self-defense,” Monica had stepped in front of Yon-Rogg almost as if she feared her mother could _actually_ harm him. And in fact if Yon was human, Carol would indeed be worried about that.

“I told you not to touch her!”

Ignoring her daughter, Maria had dragged Monica behind her when she stopping in front of Yon-Rogg who didn’t care to move at all.

Explaining himself to a Terran, especially when all he did was doing what her child had asked for, was _way_ beneath him. He had hesitated when Monica had almost bagged him to show her some sparring moves but figured there would be no harm in teaching a young person how to defend themselves particularly as learning how to fight didn’t seem to be a part of the normal Terran upbringing.

He looked past Maria to Carol who had _very_ slowly made her way to them, almost like she wanted her friend to punch him - or perhaps test him, see if he really wouldn’t defend himself with violence.

“Aunt Carol, tell mom she’s overreacting,” Monica had freed herself out of her mother’s grip and now was standing right next to Yon-Rogg again. “See?”

She rushed forward to hit the Kree who easily avoided the attack by taking a step back yet caught her immediately when she lost balance due to her momentum.

“Footwork,” he reminded her.

“Yeah, right.”

She was eager to try it again but Maria’s _“Monica”_ made her stand still. The mother was still mad with Yon-Rogg for having ignored her order – or threat – however she _had_ to admit that he didn’t seem to harm her in anyway. She didn’t approve of her daughter sparring with a Kree soldier but at least he seemed to know better than to ‘accidentally’ hurt her in the process.

Knowing Maria surely wouldn’t let them continue practice and to mitigate the situation, Carol suggested it was time for them to go, which only partly was lie as they still had enough time to get back to the ship but it couldn’t hurt to get there a bit earlier.

All parties were more than relieved by that statement - except for Monica. She immediately started whining: “Do you _really_ have to go?”

“Yes,” Carol hugged her, running a hand through her hair. “But I promise to come back as soon as possible, Lieutenant Trouble.”

“Can’t I come with you?” the teenager suddenly asked like the thought just occurred to her now and wasn’t something that had kept her awake at night the past few days.

“What about school?” Maria questioned to remind her of her responsibilities down on Earth – not that she would have let her go even if she had already graduated and was sixty years old.

Monica rolled her eyes: “What’s more important? Ending an intergalactic war between two species that has lasted for generations or school?”

“School.”

“ _Mom._ ”

Carol chuckled, kissing her forehead: “I’ll take you with me one day, alright? _When_ you are an adult. _With_ good grades.”

Monica obviously wasn’t happy with that final answer but had to accept it anyway.

Just like the last time, Yon-Rogg walked a bit ahead when they said their goodbye and Maria reminded her once again to be careful. Carol almost told her that when it came to telling her what to do with her possible emotions, she could really team up with him.

When she had caught up to Yon, he could tell she was grinning for some reason even though he didn’t look at her, focused on the street in front of them.

“What?”

“I'm glad you and Monica get along.”

He frowned: “I expected you to be as disapproving of me training her as your friend.”

She buried her hands into her pocket, looking up at the clouded sky, nearly hoping to spot a small light that could resample to see Talos’ ship despite knowing that was impossible.

“I know you mean well,” she began, making Yon-Rogg frown even more. “And it can’t hurt teaching her some moves. This world is quite a dangerous place sometimes.”

“I suppose all planets are.”

They were walking in silence for a while, each step taking them closer to her ship and the next phase of their plan.

“So,” she began, grinning again. “How did she make you train her?”

“She asked.”

Carol pretended to be offended: “It took several weeks until you finally agreed to start my training and she just _asks_ and immediately gets what she wants?”

“I wasn’t training her to become a Kree warrior after she had just survived an explosion and blood transfusion that changed her entire genetic code, Carol,” he explained even though he knew she was just joking. Taking her serious when she wasn’t sometimes was even more enjoyable than teasing her right back.

“I see you are having a new favorite,” she sighed theatrically.

“I don’t play favorites,” Yon-Rogg immediately defended himself. He knew it wasn’t true, that Minn-Erva had been his favorite in the Starforce, that it showed – and that his favoritism became even more apparent when Vers came into his life and replaced Minn-Erva. It wasn’t necessarily that he was stricter with everyone who wasn’t Vers; he was just… _less_ strict with her.

It had been something he had always regretted as he fared his willingness to this much slide may get her killed some day but for whatever reason he just couldn’t bring himself to ever be mad with her. Not even when she dared laughing about his billionth attempt to lecture her about hiding ones emotions. He never understood why that had been the case as he hadn’t been this _soft_ with Minn-Erva or anyone for that matter. But he just was with _her_. Always.

“Of course, you would _never_ do that.”

“Are you jealous?” his voice was completely toneless but Carol knew he was now teasing her. “Or do you fear not being good enough and simply want me to train you more?”

“Perhaps you only taught her some self-defense to distract yourself from the thought of having to apologize to Talos in a few hours.”

“If telling yourself that keeps your jealousy in check.”

Carol ignored him: “Have you figured out what to say yet?”

“Have _you_ figured out what to say yet? You know Talos better than I do but I doubt he’ll welcome me with open arm and be pleased about my presence.”

She had been dreading talking to Talos that as much as Yon-Rogg dreaded apologizing to him but he didn’t need to know that.

“That’ll depend on how I introduce you. If I tell him you are my prisoner, he certainly _will_ be quite pleased.”

Yon-Rogg almost considered pretending to have been captured by her as it seemed like a better option than having to apologize to Talos. The latter was hurting his pride much more than the former. In fact, the former wasn’t hurting it at all.

Despite continuing to joke around until they reach the ship – and carefully inspected it and its surroundings to be sure the Kree hadn’t found it – their mood wasn’t cheerful at all, knowing what hard work lied in front of them. Not only having to convince Talos of their plan, realizing the entire plan itself would be incredibly difficult, borderline impossible even.

But in a way it almost reminded them of their days in the Starforce, when they’d be constantly faced with tough tasks and somehow they had _always_ succeeded. Granted they were now missing four people but _just_ them as a team worked even better.

They’d manage to end the war somehow. Manage to change both the Kree’s and the Skrulls’ minds.

They _had_ to.

Even if it was the last thing they do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Easter to those who celebrate it (and @ everyone else just have a Sunday/Monday)! ♥


	14. His Memory

Carol had sneaked into the ships or buildings of her enemies before; countless times although slinking was never her preferred method or strength for that matter. Blasting her way in was fun and definitely quicker than carefully planning routes, avoiding any possible encounters or making any noises but even _she_ had to admit it wasn’t always the right decision.

It was the anxiety that really got to her. In a battle the adrenalin would take over, making her forget the danger she got herself into. It made her reckless, sure. Although she was incredibly strong, quite possibly the strongest woman in the universe, she still was vulnerable and had been seriously wounded once or twice before. Yet she liked to tell herself that acting quick and without giving the enemy the chance to even _understand_ what was happening was always safer than quietly making her way through their territory.

And it wasn’t only her own safety that she was worried about. Often enough she’d free innocent civilians out of slavery or other captivities, people she’d endanger if she was carelessly firing left and right but also people their captors could use as living shields – something they’d only get the chance to if _she_ wasn’t fast enough, if they got the chance to _react_ to her. And that was much harder when she was taking them out without caring about her cover.

It was a double edged sword and it always seemed like she had to find the perfect balance of the two, sneaking around and silently but quickly taking her enemies out one by one. However that was easier said than done.

During her time in the Starforce Yon-Rogg had always told her to think, to get out of situations by using her brain – or preventing to get into them in the first place. Carol understood what he was trying to tell her over and over again but it simply didn’t work for her. Perhaps it really did work for him, no, it _definitely_ worked for him, otherwise he wouldn’t have gotten this far into his career and made it out alive out of so many battles in which countless others met their demise. But she was different. Thinking meant giving her fears enough room to surface – _to control her_. She never knew if Yon-Rogg simply didn’t had any fears or if unlike her he successfully managed to suppress them but whatever it was, she couldn’t do it. Acting instinctively had always been her strength; she was so effective _because_ she didn’t think too much about it. At least that’s what she told herself.

Fear was never something she could handle well – unless she stopped thinking about it and just ran straight into what terrified her. It meant getting knocked down, _a lot_ , but it also meant never being paralyzed by the sheer idea of failure.

And that’s what she was trying to do again, except it wasn’t working this time.

She had already been dreading meeting Maria and telling her about Yon-Rogg but unlike Talos she wasn’t in a position of power. Yes, they had needed her financial help but they could have also stayed at Carol’s ship overnight, eating the little she had left in her storage as a last resort. But this right now was different.

Talos trusted her ever since she had to choose between the Kree and Skrull and decided on the latter. They had spent years together finding a new home for them and picking up every Skrull they could find on their way. He was her friend and she’d trust him with her life.

But not with Yon-Rogg’s.

Carol liked to imagine he’d stay calm and listen to her explanation, immediately accepting Yon-Rogg but she knew it wouldn’t be that easy – and she was afraid he wouldn’t want to listen to her at all. Perhaps she should have told him beforehand, perhaps she should have prepared him. But it was too late now.

They had landed inside his ship and there was no reason to stay inside hers any longer. She looked at Yon who, again unlike her, seemed to be perfectly calm and not worried in the slightest. And when they both departed the realization that everything that would happen now would be her fault and her fault alone hit her.

If Talos really wouldn’t listen and immediately harm or even kill Yon-Rogg, which to his defense wouldn’t be completely unjustified, _she_ would be the one to blame. And that’s what was scaring her so much.

Losing Yon would already be bad enough but knowing it was her doing that got him into this situation would be too much to handle.

She wanted to tell herself that it was alright for her now to feel that way, that she didn’t need to be angry with him anymore and that being terrified of anything happening to him was perfectly acceptable after everything that had happened the past two weeks. But truth is she had _always_ felt that way. Yes, she was angry at him for all the lies, more hurt than anything but still angry, and she spend years wanting to beat the shit out of him, regretting having given him any easier way out. And that desire only grew over time. The longer she didn’t see him, the more she wanted to punch him. But she never wanted him to be _dead_.

At night she didn’t have those desires. In her dreams nothing had changed between them and they would train together, teasing each other like they used to. They made her crave these times, crave _him_. And in a way those dreams were even worse than the nightmares in which she would murder him in cold blood. The former showed a possible past or future, something that was preventable, but the dreams showed what she didn’t have any more and what she would _never_ have again. Waking up from a nightmare made her be thankful for whatever had disturbed her sleep, but waking up from a dream only made her realize how much she _missed_ him, how much she wanted to _be_ with him. And how much she wanted to stay in those memories a little longer.

Against all odds she now didn’t need to be asleep anymore to live her dreams. And also not to face her nightmares. If anything would happen to him, she would be to blame. In a way she really would be the one killing him.

“ _Carol_.”

When she looked up she met Yon-Rogg’s eyes, his concerned expression. For a moment she thought he was just as worried as she was - after all his own life couldn’t be meaningless to him. Not even now that he had lost everything by betraying his own people because he had won _her_ after all. And even though it might have been arrogant, she’d like to think that was giving him enough will to live.

However, his concern was regarding something else.

“Calm down.”

It almost sounded like an order yet much gentler and more understanding. Once after their training, when he was giving her yet another control-lesson, he told her he didn’t knew what was going on in her head. But he still seemed to always get her; he could tell _exactly_ what she was thinking about. Although she had tried to be as normal as possible around him, like she was looking forward to meeting Talos and seeing him apologize, he had seen right through her.

Perhaps he didn’t know _everything_ she thought about, she wished he did yet also hoped he didn’t, but he certainly understood enough to know what to say to her.

Sneaking onto the enemy’s ship had always been something she tried to avoid and even though she neither had to secretly run around nor would be facing an enemy now, it still felt a lot like it. Like she would get caught any moment – and Yon-Rogg would be the one to pay the price.

Maybe he should have at least waited on her ship at first so she could speak to Talos alone, calmly explain everything to him and hoping he’ll understand. Maybe running straight into the next room alongside him without way to prepare Talos beforehand wasn’t the smartest thing to do. Maybe for once she should have faced her anxiety instead of the immediate threat.

But maybe her method was right, maybe this _was_ the best way to do it. After all, why was she afraid? She was stronger than any Skrull; if it came down to it she could easily protect Yon-Rogg. But could she actually stand against Talos to defend the man who had almost murdered his entire family?

The first thing she saw when entering the room was Talos’ kind and welcoming smile – which quickly turned into an expression of anger. Before she even got the chance to say something, two of Talos’ men had already grabbed each of Yon-Rogg’s arms and forced him down onto his knees. To Carol’s surprise Yon didn’t defend himself, which surely would have escalated the situation even further. None of his men went for her however. Whether they were afraid knowing they had no chance against her or Talos simply didn’t want them to hold her down as well she couldn’t tell.

“What’s the meaning of this?” Talos’ voice was calm and collected, at least more than she would have expected, but it was also low and nearly threatening.

But at least he wanted to talk, was _actually_ willing to listen to her so the entire affair was already going better than she had feared.

“Remember _our_ Kree friend I mentioned?” she began, hoping the possessive pronoun would emphasize that he wasn’t a threat and here to help. “Well, uh… There he is.”

She expected Yon-Rogg to make a sharp remark about Talos’ hospitality but thankfully he kept his mouth shut.

“I know what this looks like and I should have told you earlier but I was afraid you wouldn’t even listen to me, let alone come at all if I did,” being honest with him now was the very least she could do. And hopefully also the best.

“ _Why_ is he here?”

Not only did he want to talk, Talos also hadn’t shot Yon-Rogg yet which she counted as a success.

“He’ll help us end the war,” Carol stated, certainly not expecting the Skrull to start laughing.

“The poster boy of the Kree Empire who embodies brainless loyalty is here to set an end to the war. The hero of the common Kree, _proving_ that anyone in their society can climb up the ranks in the military no matter their skin color, is here to help us fight against them. _Wonderful_.”

“I won’t fight against my people,” Yon-Rogg interposed with a lot more dignity than you’d expect from a man on his knee’s whose life was on the line.

“There you have it,” Talos said, stepping forward to walk up to Yon. “Now if you’ll excuse me-”

Carol obstructed his way, looking him directly into his eyes: “I can’t let you do that.”

“Why not?”

“I told you he is my _friend_.”

“Then you are either a fool or a traitor.”

“Both, actually,” Yon-Rogg replied, awaking this urge to just punch him inside of her again but instead she just glared at him.

“If you ever trusted me, please let me explain,” she almost pleaded, not wanting to get forced to make a choice between Yon-Rogg and the Skrull. “I was willing to listen to you when you showed up at Maria’s house, didn’t I? It’s your turn now.”

He looked at her for a moment, considering his options, before he sighed and gave in. Nodding he gave his men the sign to release Yon but not before handcuffing him at first, which was met by verbal yet not physical protest by him.

“We feel a lot safer that way, don’t we?” Talos remarked and Yon-Rogg thought about how he could still strangle him like that but knew better than to mention it.

They sat down at the nearest table, Carol taking the seat right next to Yon, partly to protect him and partly to stop him from saying something stupid, while Talos settled himself in front of them. He opened his hands in an awaiting matter, his face telling her that whatever she would tell him, he wouldn’t be impressed and certainly not easy to convince. But she hadn’t expected that anyway.

“I _accidentally_ , don’t ask, freed Yon-Rogg out of a captivity along with a couple of other victims – who weren’t an accident of course – and because he was already there anyway, I figured he could help me getting the refugees through the Kree border without raising any suspicion. After all, he still owed me something, _right_?” she looked over to Yon who didn’t bother to reply. “So after some back and forth he agreed to help me and-“

“Are you skipping over the part where you beat the shit out of me even though I was already weakened by the weeks of torture in captivity?” he asked reproachfully, earning another glare from her. He actually didn’t blame her at all, of course - it’s what he had deserved, much less than that even – but making Talos aware she hadn’t immediately been on his side and forgave him in a heartbeat couldn’t hurt.

“So _after_ I beat him up and he agreed to help me with this specific task, we had a small layover on a different planet to restock supplies,” she decided against recounting Yon’s injuries, telling herself it wasn’t a necessary detail and therefore not worth mentioning, but if she would be honest to herself for just a moment, she’d knew she _actually_ wasn’t telling him to not further embarrass Yon-Rogg. Injuries were a weakness to the Kree and asking for help was even more so. Showing any signs of pain was frowned upon and she knew that belief was deeply anchored in his mind. It was already worse enough for him that he had shown his wounds to her and not having been able to hide his agony from neither her nor the doctor had been an even greater disgrace. She didn’t need to add onto that by telling Talos about it.

And the fact that Yon didn’t interrupt her this time told her how grateful he was for it.

“As I said, he had _told_ me he’d help _however_ ,” she didn’t like talking about this part of the story; after all, mentioning his betrayal _really_ didn’t help making him look trustworthy in any way. “He had contacted Ronan meanwhile and told him about my plans, thinking he could regain his former status within the Kree if he _somehow_ brought me back to them – which is incredibly stupid, by the way.” she looked at him again. “So while Yon-Rogg and I were getting the supplies, Ronan had reached my ship and… went on a murder rampage, even though Yon had told him they were harmless civilians, thinking that would stop the Kree from harm them. Just as he had thought they wouldn’t attack the planet, which of course they did as well.”

She looked at Talos expecting him to say something that showed his disbelief in Yon’s naivety but he only waited for her to continue, completely emotionless.

“When we returned, they immediately captured us, knocking _me_ down and hooking _him_ up to the Supreme Intelligence because they considered his anger over what the Kree had done and his attempt to help me as a betrayal. I don’t know what they talked about but when I woke up and Yon-Rogg got out of the simulation, he was ordered to kill me. And _in an overly dramatic way_ ,” she stressed that part to make sure Yon was _definitely_ listening to her. “He instead freed me from the photon inhibitor they had managed to get onto my neck and that was strong enough to suppress _all_ of my powers.  The _fearless warriors_ fled of course, fucking cowards, but _Yon-Rogg_ didn’t flee. He didn’t know, Talos. He is a victim of the lies and the propaganda as much as I have been. And he was willing to die by my hands to pay for what he had done. When he actually _saw_ what the Kree were doing, he immediately stopped supporting them and was even _fighting_ them. Yon realized the errors in his way and he’s more than willing to help us end the war. In fact, the plan I want to talk with you about is _his_ plan.”

“And we should follow that plan because you are just that trustworthy?” he looked directly at Yon-Rogg now.

“Because it may be the only chance to really put an end to all of this,” Yon-Rogg clarified, knowing that trying to convince him about his reliability would be a lost cause - which he couldn’t even blame him for, as much as he disliked Talos.

“You forgave _me_ , didn’t you?” Carol interrupted.

“ _Carol_ ,” his eyes wandered back to her. “That’s different. He _lied_ to you.”

“And they _lied_ to him,” she insisted, suddenly growing more protective of him than she had imagine to be. “ _I_ forgave _you_ , didn’t I? Even though you kidnapped me and would have killed me if you wouldn’t have realized I could be useful to find your family. _I forgave you_ even though you threatened to harm Monica and, hell, you would have straight up murdered Fury if I wouldn’t have stopped you.”

Talos opened his mouth to say something but Carol didn’t give him the chance to.

“ _This is war. My hands are filthy from it too_ ,” she quoted him as a final reminder of his wrongdoings.

“It’s not-”

“I’m sorry,” Yon-Rogg suddenly said to the surprise of both them. “There is no excuse for what I have done but I truly _am_ sorry.”

“You almost killed my family.”

“And you almost killed mine,” Yon-Rogg remarked, not only referring to the ambush on the mission to find Soh-Larr but also the countless other times he and his men had tried to kill his team.

They had reached a dead end and all of them knew that. Talos leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms.

“I don’t trust you. But I trust Carol and if she thinks your plan is _that_ amazing, we may as well give it a try. However, if you try anything-”

“He won’t,” Carol quickly interfered, just happy to know she didn’t _have_ to choose, that Talos was still on their, or rather her, side.

“One condition.”

Of course there was a catch.

“I want to know what changed your mind, what converted you. Tell me what you talked about.”

Yon-Rogg frowned looking at Carol, not sure who he was referring to but she just was as clueless as him.

“With the Intelligence,” Talos clarified and Yon realized what he meant.

“No.”

“Then this conversation is over,” he pushed his hands onto the table, standing up but Carol quickly motioned him to stay.

“That’s a private thing for Kree,” she poorly defended Yon-Rogg, actually confused why he simply wouldn’t tell him, _them_. At this point she’d even be fine with Yon just lying about it.

Talos stopped but didn’t sit down again, both looking at the Kree who was determined to stand his ground, however when he looked at Carol, at her pleading eyes, his will broke immediately.

“ _Fine_ ,” he answered reluctantly.

He _could_ lie, he knew that. And there was only a small possibility that they would find out what they really talked about, but the chance was still _there_. And he couldn’t take such a risk. Not only would it endanger the peace they were aiming for and therefore the good of all Kree – he would end up disappointing Carol. And he had done that more than enough in his life.

“They gave me the order to kill her and I pretended to follow it.”

“And you could easily fool your precious A.I. just like that,” Talos scoffed, not convinced at all.

“No. They showed me something beforehand which was supposed to… remind me of why I’m fighting in this war. And it _would_ have worked, it had worked before, but-” he cut himself off. “It didn’t this time.”

Of course Talos had noticed his hesitation.

“Why not?”

“I had seen what the Kree were doing and I… just wanted to protect _her_ ,” he admitted, unsure why it was so hard for him to do that suddenly. After all, protecting the Kree had been his job, protecting his team an almost daily task. He had _always_ wanted to protect _Vers_ and had no problem admitting that but saying he wants to protect _Carol_ out loud felt so differently.

Talos looked at him and then at Carol, thinking about something before he continued his interrogation: “And what did it show you?”

“A memory,” he replied dryly, not willing to explain it any further.

“Of…?”

“My mother.”

“He answered all your questions, Talos,” she didn’t like seeing Yon-Rogg this uncomfortable. She had never seen him like this before and she was dying to know what would cause him to behave like that but his well-being meant more, so much more, to her than the satisfaction of her own curiosity. “Can we get to the plan now?”

“I cannot trust him if he isn’t even willing to simply answer my que-”

“She died trying to protect me from a Skrull, Jag’har, who pretended to be her to trick me into letting him into the house when I was about five years old. Does that answer your question? Or do you need me to go into details?” he had attempted to sound as emotionless as possible but anger quickly started to rise in him. He stared right Talos but not dared to look at Carol.

Talos was quiet for a while before he nodded to one of his men again who went over to Yon and freed him from his handcuffs.

“I knew Jag’har. He had always been an extremist and we disagreed on most if not all things. I was told he was killed in an ambush by the Kree, dying as a hero,” he explained, making both Carol and Yon think he doesn’t believe him at all. “But this sounds a lot more like him.”

Yon-Rogg still didn’t trust him and the feeling was mutual, however he started to understand that the Skrull were lied to as well. Perhaps not as systematically as it happened to the Kree, after all they didn’t have an actual government anymore, but it happened nonetheless and was probably as established in their culture as it was in the Kree’s.

Without losing any further time and to simply distract himself from the memory, he started to explain his plan, or rather the rough draft as it still needed a lot of fine-tuning, and Talos immediately seemed intrigued, adding a few ideas here and there.

“That’s an ambitious project, Yon-Rogg,” Talos said once he was finished.

“Ending a war that has lasted for millennia could be considered ambitious, yes.”

“So you are in?” Carol asked so impatiently it made Yon believe she had to go somewhere.

“I guess we don’t have a lot to lose, do we?” Talos replied. “But things this big need a lot of careful planning and preparation.”

She smiled leaning forward: “Which brings me to my next question.”

“You need a place to stay,” he noted, grinning almost. “I surely won’t kick you out, don’t worry. I won’t kick _you_ out either.” He looked over to Yon-Rogg who nodded acknowledging – probably the closest to a thank you he could get.

Carol stood up eagerly, asking if she was allowed to use the kitchen. She had stayed with Talos on this ship before and could easily find the way without any directions but she didn’t want to be so impolite to just use it without his permission.

“It’s all yours.”

She headed to the nearest door, throwing a “Come on, Yon-Rogg.” over her shoulder which he tried to counter quite unsuccessfully.

“I’m not your- I’m coming,” he stood up as well, passing Talos on his way to her.

“Remember,” Talos whispered, hoping Carol couldn’t hear him. “Don’t do anything stupid. I’m watching you.”

“Likewise.”

 _“Yon,”_ Carol was standing in the door frame, impatiently waiting for him.

“You are not starving, Carol.”

Rolling his eyes he still swiftly followed, leaving Talos and the plans behind for the evening. As annoyed as he pretended to be by her commanding tone, he was actually really glad she didn’t leave him alone with Talos. Of course he wasn’t scared of him but he could really imagine better company - especially when she was the alternative.

She was walking a bit ahead but when she heard the door closing behind Yon-Rogg immediately stopped in her tracks.

“You never told me.”

Yon wasn’t sure if it was a simple statement or an accusation.

“It doesn’t matter,” he replied honestly because it really had no relevance to their relationship. It wasn’t even a lie he had told her back on Hala, it had always simply been something he avoided to talk about and while Vers could be annoyingly curious, she never tried to push him to tell her about his family or past. The only thing she kept nagging him about was who he sees the Intelligence as but even that was rather teasing than serious questioning.

She didn’t say anything else until they reached the kitchen which started to unnerve him.

“Are you angry with me?” he couldn’t imagine her to be but he also had no other explanation for why she wouldn’t even look at him.

“No, you idiot.”

He knew that tone. He would _always_ recognize it. Yon-Rogg hadn’t heard it in years and had hoped he would never have to hear it again. She sounded just like she did the first few times she reached out to him for shelter after a nightmare, clearly shaken and upset by her dreams.

And just as it had been back then it was _his_ fault again she felt like that.

“I’m so sorry you had to go through that,” she said quietly, still not looking at him.

“I told you it doesn’t matter anymore.”

Carol knew the Kree weren’t devoted – not in comparison to humans at least. Physical affection was rare and in many relationships completely non-existent. She had always subconsciously missed that on Hala despite thinking she was raised just like everyone and was therefore not able to explain why she wanted more than an occasional praise or smile.

The memories of her life on Earth back finally also explained the urge she had always felt and made her only feel more alienated from their culture.

She knew Kree probably didn’t crave hugs or anything similar, not most of them at least, otherwise it probably wouldn’t be collectively frowned upon but Yon-Rogg, just like her, had always been different in that regard. He _had_ rested his hands on her shoulders supportively and even hugged her a few times when she came to him after a nightmare, trying to calm her down.

It had never been the other way around however – not until now at least.

The embrace had surprised Yon so much, it took him a moment to hug her back and even longer to realize that this time she wasn’t looking for comfort, no matter how upset she seemed, _she_ was actually comforting _him_.

He didn’t know for how long the hug lasted and he didn’t even know for how long he had been wanting this; all he could think about the wish to stay like this forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I drew some Yonvers in case anyone wants to check it out (https://judelaw.co/post/184485045450/its-a-local-gym-that-yon-roggs-been-going) and I'm currently working on something bigger to practise drawing digitally. Practising drawing had also been the reason it took me this long to update, I'm so sorry 😬


	15. Finding You

_“Vers. Do you copy?”_

_Nothing._

_“Vers!”_

_The comm-link stayed silent, not even sending a faint static to affirm his messages were received somewhere; that perhaps Vers was listening but couldn’t reply._

_They had lost her._ He _had lost her. And it was_ his _fault. Yon-Rogg had known it was a trap, had seen right through the ambush by the Skrulls, he wanted to retreat or at least find a different path – but he didn’t. Vers wanted to go, was eager to go on her own._

_And he had given in._

_Like he always did._

_He clenched his fist trying to control his anger, his fear, the sheer disgust he felt with himself. What an idiot he had been. What an incompetent leader._

_Yes, he had lost warriors before - it was inevitable at war - but never had he lost a team member. The closest he had ever experienced was losing Sun-Val, a pilot he had specifically asked for to join their mission. She had died by the hands of a Skrull yet he blamed himself more for it than he blamed her murderer. Sun-Val wouldn’t have been there if it wasn’t for him, if it wasn’t for his request and he had taken the full responsibility for her death not only in front of their superiors but in front of his own conscience as well._

_Losing anyone and knowing that he as a commander had failed to have no casualties, to protect his subordinates, had always been a heavy burden but one he was willing to bear if it was for the good of all Kree._

_But he wasn’t ready to bear this one._

_“Vers! Answer me,” he tried again, dreading every step they got closer to the Helion. He knew they had to leave without her, that they couldn’t wait for her. Losing even more time would only endanger his entire team – and himself but that was secondary. “Vers!”_

_Never before had he detested the sight of their ship but now he almost wished it was gone, that a Skrull had managed to destroy it somehow. He desperately tried to think of an excuse to stay behind, to search for her – but there simply was none. After all it was his duty to stay with his team, to report to the Supremor._

_He had failed the mission and it was the first time he ever had._

_Yon-Rogg knew that day would come; he had told himself it wouldn’t, that he would never fail, that he would live up to his status of a hero among the Kree – but deep down he had always known it would happen eventually._

_It had been something he was terribly afraid of; perhaps it had even been his biggest fear. He had thought about facing the Supreme Intelligence then, knowing he had disappointed his leader and how he would probably hate himself more for his failure than the Supremor ever could. An unpleasant thought, but also one that had kept him going, had made him fight for each and every single victory._

_He had perpetually been scared of this day. Of his first failure._

_But right now he didn’t care._

_All he cared about was Vers._

_As the Helion left Torfa and entered the safe emptiness of space, he locked himself into his room, pretending to need to talk to the Supreme Intelligence as soon as possible yet in reality he was still trying to contact Vers._

_He had ordered his team to stay close to Torfa instead of returning to Hala right away and they listened to him of course but he could see the reluctance in their eyes. However he didn’t care about that either._

_“Vers,” his voice was calmer now. “Vers, please reply.”_

_He waited a moment, praying to some kind of deity he didn’t believe in._

_“I’m_ not _giving up on you.”_

_Silence._

_“Wherever you are, I’ll find you.”_

_Still nothing._

_“Hang on - that’s an order,” he closed his eyes focusing only on his hearing, hoping to pick up any kind of noise, anything that would reassure him she was still alive. “_ Please. _”_

_He had never realized how loud silence was._

_“I know you never listen to me but just for once do it. Hang on until I find you,” the last sentence almost sounded like a plea. And it certainly was one. “Even if you are at the other end of the universe I will come and get you.”_

_He sat down on his bed, running his hand through his hair, weary and exhausted. Usually he would be thinking about the mission now, recalling what went wrong and what didn’t, learning from his and his team members’ mistakes. But his mind refused to let go of Vers for even just one second._

_“Vers.”_

“Carol.”

She smiled weakly at Talos, tired and worn-out from the day that had been much more draining than she had expected it to be.

“Still nightmares?”

Talos was used to her wandering around in the middle of the night (or rather the artificially set time in space in which she should be sleeping) since the first day they had spent together. Back then he had found her running, literally running, through the ship, exhausting her body instead of getting her well-deserved rest. She had told him she couldn’t sleep and after all she had just been through, he couldn’t blame her. And while the realization that everything she had believed to be true for six years was just a lie surely weighed heavily on her; it took him months to understand the issue was much deeper than that.

The nightmares from Hala didn’t disappear; they had only changed, now showing Yon-Rogg as Mar-Vell’s murderer instead of a Skrull. She thought she would have been over it, especially now that she knew what had happened. Carol missed Dr. Lawson and mourned her death, yes, but there was no excuse for the nightmares to still be this present after more six years. It was over. She had lived and come out of it as so much stronger, so much more confident. Yet they were still there, now joined by new nightmares.

The human side in her considered actual therapy to get through it, however it wasn’t like a hero actually had time for consoling so she simply would have to wait for it to get better – or live with it until she dies.

Albeit nightmares were often her only company at night, it was the lack of a different company that had kept her up.

She hated to admit it to herself but she missed Yon-Rogg. Now that they had an entire spaceship for themselves there was no excuse anymore to sleep in the same room let alone bed. It had only been two weeks but somehow she had grown so used to his body lying next to hers that it now felt like it was the first time in years she had to sleep on her own.

In addition to that she was also worried about him. She knew the nightmares hadn’t stopped for Yon either – and she hadn’t expected them to just because he had opened up to her. Unlike her, he wouldn’t seek her room out and would rather stay by himself. She wished she could do something to help, to _force_ his stubborn ego to let her help him. There was little she could do, Carol knew that, but she could still be there for him. Just like he had always been for her.

“Yeah. Bad dreams,” of course she couldn’t admit the actual reason why she was walking around the ship as and almost ran into him.

When Yon-Rogg was still with them, Talos had been stern and cold but now he was his old self again, smiling fondly at her as he suggested for them to sit down.

“Thank you for not having murdered him,” she actually meant that. Carol could imagine how much self-control it had taken him not to kill Yon-Rogg right then and there and she was more than grateful for it.

Talos almost laughed, grinning as he leaned back and watched the space flow by through a nearby window: “That credit belongs to you not me. I will still shoot him when I get an excuse to.”

“That’s fair,” she shrugged. “I promise he’s serious about the entire thing, though.”

“I do not doubt how serious he is about _you_ , I doubt how serious he is about stopping the Kree,” Talos explained, still looking outside. “Although he _had_ chosen you over them.”

Carol smiled shaking her head: “He hadn’t chosen me over them. He just realized what the Kree were actually doing.”

He now looked at her directly, frowning as a furtive expression lied on his lips.

“You _really_ think that?”

“Yes, of course,” she was baffled as to why she should think otherwise.

Now Talos seemed to challenge her, looking like he was about to offer a bet he knew she would lose: “Correct me if I’m wrong but didn’t he choose to save instead of killing you? Even though that had been his order?”

Always up for a challenge and confident she’s right, she crossed her arms in front of her chest and lifted her head in an inviting manner.

“He didn’t choose to save me,” Carol replied. “He just chose to stop supporting the Kree which _resulted_ in him saving me.”

The Skrull shook his head. He was tempted to let Carol believe that but perhaps she deserved to know – and he had no obligation towards Yon-Rogg that would make him keep a secret.  
“He could have tried to leave the Kree later on in a way that wouldn’t make him a public enemy, Carol,” he explained in an omniscient tone. “But saving you was obviously worth the hassle.”

“Assuming you are correct – which you are not,” she said, now little bit less confident than before. “Wouldn’t that refute your doubts? That he isn’t serious about stopping the Kree? After all he chose me over them, right?”

“Your life is more important to him than his own, I know that. He would die to protect you – but would he die to stop the Kree?”

“I’d rather none of us die in the process.”

“That’s beyond the point. If he finds himself in a situation where you aren’t in danger and yet he still has to work against the Kree – will he do it?”

“Yes,” Carol replied without any hesitation – though she wasn’t so sure about it herself. She knew Yon-Rogg had changed and was serious about his plan but that was all just theory and probably easier said than done. Knowing how loyal he was, how devoted and, most importantly, how brainwashed by the propaganda, she started to fear Talos may be right. Perhaps he really only wanted to protect her and not fight for peace. Perhaps he wasn’t even aware of that himself.

But then again – did she actually matter _this_ much to him?

“How can you be so sure he really wanted to save me? That he cares about me like that?” she asked, genuinely wondering how Talos could be so confident in one possibility but completely regard the other. “Maybe all that is just a scheme. Or maybe he really wants to stop the Kree and is just using me to do so.”

The second option was ridiculous; she knew that herself but she wanted to prove a point to him, that he couldn’t possibly know what Yon-Rogg’s true motives and feelings were.

“I know him better than that.”

“Oh, do you?” she raised a brow skeptically. She was aware the two of them knew of each other’s existence before they met on Mar-Vell’s ship, that maybe they had even ran across one another once or twice – but that was it. If they had any deeper history than that, Carol would surely know about it by now.  Because either Yon or Talos would have mentioned it at some point.

“When we…” he held on for a moment to think of the right term to use. “ _Met_ …”

“That’s a nice way to describe a kidnapping.”

Talos ignored her: “When we met, I met _him_ as well.”

Carol has never heard about them running into each other. And if they did, why would that make Talos think he suddenly knew Yon-Rogg better than her – or at all for that matter.

“Funny little thing that comm-link is,” he said cryptically, tipping on the part of her arm where the device would be located if she was wearing her suit right now. “Don’t you think?”

“Can you stop talking like that and get to the point?”

“Okay, okay,” he laughed. “It took us a while to figure out how to turn it off, how to stop it from receiving messages.”

She still didn’t understand what he was talking about.

“So we were forced to listen to Yon-Rogg trying to contact you for much longer than I would have liked to.”

Carol had never thought about how he must have tried to reach out to her, it was simply something that had never crossed her mind. However, she didn’t see what was so special about that. After all Yon-Rogg had been her commander, of course he would try to find her.

Right?

_“Vers.”_

“It was so annoying, you have no idea.”

 _“Vers, I know you are out there. You_ have _to be.”_

“He just wouldn’t stop.”

_“I won’t give up. No matter how long it takes to find you.”_

“Instead of accepting you could be dead-”

_“Vers, please.”_

“-he kept calling out to you.”

_“I’ll find you.”_

“Well, he was my commander,” Carol reasoned. “Naturally he would do that.”

“Is that the protocol?” Talos asked despite knowing the answer. “Never leaving anyone behind even if they could be dead? Always dropping everything to find said person instead of accepting they are gone and moving on?”

“No…” she admitted.

Talos stood up, suggesting the conversation was over as he still wanted to get some sleep himself.

“He wasn’t calling out to you as your commander,” that was the last thing Talos would say to her regarding the topic. Perhaps it would have been better to never tell Carol about that since it made Yon-Rogg look slightly better than he really was. But maybe she deserved to know. And in the end it was just proving his point anyway. Love was dangerous and unreliable. Hopefully she will understand that one day. Yon-Rogg was only interested in Carol, not in stopping the Kree. He knew that.

And he knew it would be someone’s downfall.

Carol didn’t stop him from walking away and instead went back to her room herself, confused, maybe even agitated. She was still thinking about what Talos had told her and what _“not as your commander”_ was supposed to mean when she reached her door in front of which she found Yon-Rogg.

“What are you doing here?”

“It’s nice to see you too,” Yon replied amusedly, righting himself as he had spent the past hour or so leaning against the wall. She rolled her eyes at him yet couldn’t hide a smile.

“But to answer your question, I was waiting for you.”

“I figured that much,” she passed him to open the door. “But _why_ were you waiting?”

He got more uncomfortable now, awkwardly shifting his weight from one foot to another as he avoided her glance.

“I was looking for you and couldn’t find you so I decided to wait here since you’d have to show up eventually,” he answered honestly but quickly tried to change the topic. “What were you doing anyway?”

“Catching up with Talos,” she didn’t want to admit she couldn’t sleep. It would only make him concerned thinking the nightmares made her flee the bed or cocky because she’d tell him his absence was the reason for her behavior.

She walked inside expecting him to naturally follow her but he didn’t set a foot inside, still waiting in the door frame.

“So you missed sleeping next to me, huh?” she teased. It wasn’t something she actually considered to be true but she wanted to see him react to such a statement. Carol predicted any kind of response from annoyance to offence but instead he looked like she caught him doing something wrong.

“No,” he then said, obviously making something up. “I just wanted to be sure you can handle being separated from me. It must be hard to not have anybody to steal the blanket from.”

“We had _one_ blanket and _I_ sat down on the bed first so it was _my_ blanket that I _generously_ shared with you.”

“I had to sleep without it for most of the nights, how is that sharing?”

“Sharing it with you for one minute is still sharing,” Carol insisted. “Now, are you going to come in or will you block the door for the rest of the flight?”

He moved out of the frame seemingly unimpressed: “I have manners and don’t invade other people’s personal space uninvited. Unlike _other_ people.”

“There is no personal space between us,” she vindicated frivolously. It was meant to be a joke but now that she thought about it she realized it was closer to the truth than she liked to confess.

Why was that though? On Hala she wouldn’t even have bothered to lie about it, after all it was no secret that Yon-Rogg and her pretty much shared everything. Mostly their time but there were a lot of things only they knew about one another, things they would never share with anyone else. They were close, closer than they had ever been to someone and despite telling herself for the past years that all of this wasn’t real, she had come to perceive that it was.

Her name, her origin, all of that was a lie – but her relationship with Yon-Rogg wasn’t. Just as it wasn’t now. So what was different? Why did she admit without any hesitation how strong their bond was as Vers but now as Carol had so much trouble to even just accept that herself?

Yon hadn’t said and just waited for her to do something, to throw him out, telling him she wants to sleep - but she didn’t. Instead Carol lay down on the bed and rolled over to turn away from him.

“Turn the lights off before coming over,” she ordered staring at the wall in front of her.

“What?”

She didn’t reply. It had been a stupid idea, a ludicrous thought that he even wanted that – that _she_ wanted that. As Vers she wouldn’t have cared; she had slept over at his apartment more than once, basically letting herself in. And he had always let her, given her the bed while he took the couch. It had felt so natural to her that she had never thought twice about it but now that she, Carol, was offering Yon-Rogg to sleep in her bed even though there was absolutely _no_ excuse to do so, nothing about their relationship felt natural anymore. And yet it seemed so familiar, like sharing a bed was a logical conclusion.

The lights went off and Carol expected to hear the door open and close, to be left alone in the dark in a mutual agreement that they would never mention this again.

But instead she felt the blanket getting lifted, the mattress shifting and then there he was, lying next to her just like he had the previous nights - yet also like he never had before. He hadn’t left but she was still right about the unspoken agreement of never talking about this so instead Carol asked something she had been thinking about the entire time.

“Did you really try to find me?”

“Yes,” Yon-Rogg replied.

He couldn’t possibly know she wasn’t referring to this particular night but to her disappearance on Torfa yet it didn’t matter as his answer would have still been the same.

“I always will.”


	16. A Monster

No one trusted him but Yon-Rogg hadn’t expected anyone to. He was forbidden the access to most rooms on Talos’ ship, especially after they had decided to go to his new home planet to further work on their plans as floating in front of C-53 wasn’t the smartest idea. The Skrulls were afraid he’d figure out the position and pass the information on to the Kree, which actually wasn’t a far-fetched fear and Yon-Rogg understood their skepticism. He wouldn’t treat them differently - or even himself for that matter.

None of this bothered him, he tried to interact as little as possible with the Skrulls anyway, but what _did_ bother him was the boredom.

Due to the limited amount of rooms he was allowed to use he usually stayed inside Carol’s ship which served its purpose of getting around the universe quite well but didn’t have much to offer beyond that.

He’d spend most of time meditating or training to get back to his old self but this burning urge to do something more useful than that would only grow the more days passed.

Yon didn’t care about where their new home was. He didn’t fully trust the Skrulls, yes, but even _if_ he wanted to he couldn’t get the coordinates to the Empire anyhow. Of course he was curious though. The time it had taken them to get to C-53 was a great indicator of how far away their planet was and narrowed down the possible solar systems by quite a lot. It would be impossible to tell which system let alone planet it was in the end but he was already satisfied having figured out the vague direction they were going in.

Unlike in their motel room, Carol wasn’t bored at all. She seemed to have a lot of fun joking with Talos and other Skrulls she knew and often vanished in one of the rooms he wasn’t allowed to enter for hours. Yon-Rogg was happy she had something to do apparently but somehow it still irritated him how much time she would spend with them. Certainly not because it meant she’d spend less time with him rather because he was still wary of the Skrulls and thought Carol shouldn’t blindly trust them – or anyone, really. He simply was afraid her feelings and personal history with them was clouding her judgement, it was nothing more than that.

She still showed up eventually, mostly to tease him it seemed but once they even sparred together – as good as it was possible in her ship. Carol did her best to look as carefree and happy as ever but Yon could see right through her masquerade. He didn’t ask, he knew she would only deny it, but he figured out what was going on in her head – or at least he thought so but he would later know he really did make the right call.

C-53 was somewhat of an annoying experience but at least no one knew who he was. It had looked like they did to him at first but he had to admit it was only due to his unusual clothing. Once he had changed no one cared about him anymore – except for Maria, who was the only Terran (apart from that man she was with on Mar-Vell’s ship) who had any kind of history with him.

And that’s where his problem lied: In Mar-Vell’s ship. The Skrulls knew _exactly_ who he was and what he had done, there was no way they wouldn’t recognize him the minute he sat a foot on their ground. Even if not everyone was aware of his identity, the ones who didn’t know him would soon get informed by the others.

It was this lack of popularity that kept Carol so unfocused whenever she was around him and he would have liked to take these worries away from her but she was right. Convincing – or rather make them tolerate him – Maria and Talos was one thing but to persuade an entire population was on a completely different level.

He wasn’t scared of them yet it still felt like running directly into a trap and that was immensely unsettling.

Getting celebrated as a hero by the Kree had always made him proud. Common people approaching him, thanking him, admiring him - he had always been grateful for all of this and it made him feel like what he did, that he was constantly risking his life for them, was worth it. It had never been his goal in life but now he certainly missed the times entire nations didn’t hate him, had it made his existence a lot easier. And it would make Carol’s life easier as well.

There had been moments in which he asked himself if all of this was worth it for her, if going through the trouble of taking him with her everywhere was really what he deserved. He knew how important Maria was to her yet during all their time on Earth they had barely seen each other because of him. She had to go through the hassle of defending him in front of the people she loved the most the entire time and out of experience he was well aware of how tiring that could be.

Back when she was Vers he had to do it all the time, defend her in front of the Supreme Intelligence, his other superiors, sometimes his own team even, especially Minn-Erva and Korath.  He never regretted doing it but Carol surely had to at some point.

Still he couldn’t help himself but feel thankful whenever she chose to spend time with him – instead of with Talos or anyone else. Perhaps it was a bit petty but he also wasn’t interest in overthinking his emotions right now.

The closer they got to this mysterious planet, the more distressed she looked and the more impossible it became to ignore it. It was weird in a way that he felt like he had to do it in the first place had she always shared her feelings with him on Hala. But things were different now. So different.  Not only wasn’t she Vers anymore, he also wasn’t the Yon-Rogg he had been back then.

Yet the overwhelming desire of caring for her was still there.

Something hard hit his head, not so forcefully it actually hurt but certainly enough to get him out of his thoughts and shift his attention elsewhere. He picked up the book that had fallen to the ground when its flight path got abruptly interrupted by his skull and look questioning at Carol who had entered the room without him noticing, waiting for her to explain why she did that.

Carol had seen how concerned Yon-Rogg had been, how worried and distracting him by teasing was the only option she had, other than to actually talk about it which wasn’t something she looked forward to. She wanted them both to forget everything for a moment, to just be the two of them.

“A Kree always needs to be prepared for a possible ambush,” she lectured as humorously as she could manage. “You are out of shape.”

He sighed in a way that suggested he sometimes rued having saved her life, which he never did of course but she sometimes was just a lot to deal with.

“Carol-”

“No excuses,” she quickly said to not even give him the chance to talk himself out of this. “Wanna fight?”

Yon-Rogg placed the book on a nearby table, sighing again as he opened his arms in an inviting matter.

“You won’t accept a no, will you?”

 “Absolutely not.”

She rushed forward, throwing a blow at him that he easily avoided however she hasn’t expected to actually strike him. Spinning around she tried another lousy attempt, this time aiming for his torso to make him lose balance. He easily blocked her by catching her fist and holding onto it.

“I know what you are doing.”

Carol used her other arm to free her hand, getting ready for another attack that served no other purpose than to distract him. They didn’t have to land - just attract his attention.

“Is it working?”

There was no point in denying her true intentions; Yon-Rogg knew her different fighting styles well enough by now.

“No.”

“Guess I need to try harder then.”

Waiting for him to attack her was a lost cause so she almost jumped at him, trying to provoke any kind of reaction that wasn’t just the bare minimum of self-defense.

“Carol,” he began again in the same tone he would use to insist on her finally starting to talk about her dreams to anyone in the hope they’d get better. “We really-”

He didn’t get any further as she managed to hit him straight into his face, sending him back stumbling. Groaning he pressed his hand against the bleeding nose. Yon had managed to catch himself before falling down but showed no interest in starting a counter-attack.

Eventually realizing her strategy wasn’t working, she rolled her eyes at him yet still looked for some kind of fabric he could use to not bleed all over her floor.

“You’ve _really_ gotten out of shape.”

Yon-Rogg pulled up his shirt to stop the bleeding as neither of them could spot anything else they could use - and somehow seeing his bare upper body again made her forget to continue searching for something. It was a sight she regularly got to enjoy on Hala and in fact there was nothing more special about it this time yet she immediately felt like she had back then, back when their relationship wasn’t this… strange.

“Not _too_ much out of shape, I guess,” she admitted, unable to hide a grin when he simply glared at her.

He let the shirt fall back and opened his mouth to finally talk with her about what is troubling her – what is troubling _both_ of them – however as an alarm announced the ship was now entering the atmosphere of their destination, he knew there wasn’t enough time to do it anymore. At least not in the lengths the situation would demand.

Expecting her to be happy about having gotten exactly what she wanted in the end, he looked over to her but all he saw was the worry he had noticed the days before.

Carol sighed walking ahead: “Well, into the lion’s den.”

“The what?”

He didn’t get a reply and he didn’t care enough to insist on one. They were both thinking about what lied ahead of them. Unlike with Maria and Talos Carol now had actually put a lot of thought into what she’d say to the Skrulls, especially Talos’ family. While Yon-Rogg was sleeping next to her, or at least pretended to, she kept agonizing over the situation, thinking about what words she could use and what she _should_ and _shouldn’t_ tell them about their journey so far. Of course she had talked with Talos about it as well who promised to come up with some kind of plan but if he actually had managed to he hadn’t told her yet.

It was weird, their role reversal that kept manifesting in various ways. On Hala, Carol was often a victim of racism when she hadn’t earned her Starforce uniform yet. Pink Kree weren’t considered as pure as blue ones and therefore often the target of violence and insults. As a hero of the Kree and Starforce commander, Yon-Rogg was the exception to the rule, reveling popularity and every form of positive recognition a being could possibly come up with. The people would bow to him instead of looking down on him yet he hadn’t forgotten about the abused he had to face himself before his achievements.

Yon-Rogg didn’t hold grudges let alone was interested in revenge but he would call out any kind of racism towards others and intervene – especially when it was targeted towards Vers. Looking back Carol wondered if his even more aggressive approach when it came to her was due to the fact that he felt guilty for having brought her into the situation in the first place (even though he couldn’t be sure if humans didn’t have the exact same social issues) yet she was still grateful for it. There were other pink Kree in positions of power who didn’t seem to care too much about the injustice as soon as they weren’t confronted with it anymore but Yon had always been different in that regard. Perhaps that was another reason he was so beloved.

He had always defended her against anything, not only the racism but any kind of doubts that others would have and for some reason she had always taken it for granted. And while it was true that she wouldn’t have been on Hala if it wasn’t for him, he still didn’t have to do any of this. She had been in such a vulnerable and gullible state back then that if Yon-Rogg would have told her she just had to accept anything thrown at her, she would have believed him. However he had kept telling her how great she was all the time, bailed her out of situations she had gotten herself into instead of letting her fully face the consequences. He had basically told others to fuck off whenever they questioned her even when he had the exact same worries as them and it only now started to slowly dawn on her how much he had done that actually wasn’t necessary if he had just wanted to keep up a lie.

And just like he didn’t have to do any of this, Carol now wouldn’t have to defend Yon against the Skrulls no matter what – but she wanted to.

It wasn’t a feeling of responsibility – yes, she had brought him here but unlike with the racism, he _had_ actually done something wrong – it was actual affection.

Maybe he had felt the same way on Hala.

There was no time to dwell on this now that they had a both reached the exit of the ship, meeting Talos and the rest of the crew who were all excited to finally be home again. At least not everyone was about to head to complete misery.

Talos frowned as he saw the big blue strain on Yon-Rogg’s shirt.

“Did you stab him?”

“No, she didn’t,” Yon replied, annoyed with constantly getting talked over like he wasn’t standing right next to them.

The Skrull just carried on like he hadn’t said anything:  “Ladies first.”

It was an expression Skrulls didn’t use, that he had picked up from Carol since she had kept saying it whenever they faced a threat to just jump right into the action before any of them got the chance to do it before her. He had figured Terrans must always send the women first into the battle.

Carol didn’t wait for any further invitation and, just like she did when encountering enemies, walked ahead. Opening the door she was met by sunlight and a crowed of Skrulls who were eagerly waiting for Talos and the others to return.

She had just walked down the ramp when a familiar voice called out to her.

“Carol!” the little Skrull had made her way through the crowd and fell right into her arms.

“Rhena,” Carol smiled hugging her. As frightening as it was to be back, she was still happy to see her again. Just like with Monica she had grown so fond of her as if they were actually related. A few other children joined them, children she had almost spend as much time with as with Rhena. They started to talk across each other, each kid wanting to tell her about their progress, what they had seen and done while she was away and express how much they missed her. She couldn’t understand any of them but before she managed to calm them down and tell them to talk one at a time they froze in terror.

She didn’t have to look as she already knew what had caused them to immediately hide behind her yet she still turned around to watch Yon-Rogg slowly walking next Talos and the others. A murmur went through the crowd as they started to see what the children had spotted and a lot of them even took a cautious step back.

“It’s alright, he won’t hurt you,” she reassured the little Skrulls clinging onto her but as much as they trusted Carol, her words had little meaning to them when it came to Kree.

“What is _he_ doing here?”

Soren had emerged next to Carol, gently pulling her daughter behind her.

“He’s here to help,” Carol announced loud enough for the other Skrulls to hear but of course that had little to no effect. “He won’t harm anyone of you, I promise.”

“He already has,” Soren spit, walking up to her husband. “What’s the meaning of this, Talos?”

Carol only now fully came to the realization that just as she had been hiding Yon-Rogg’s involvement from Talos, he had obviously done the same with the people of his home planet.

Talos raised his arms in a soothing manner, taking her hands into his: “I’ll explain it to you later, just trust me.”

“No, you do it _now_ ,” a Skrull demanded which was met by a noise of agreement from the rest of the crowd. A few others started to raise their voice as well when Talos did his best to calm them down.

 “He is here to help us end the war,” Carol tried to explain, freeing herself from the children as she walked up to stand right next to him. “I know he has a… uh… complicated relationship with a few of you but he has changed and-”

Some Skrulls began to laugh and talked about how Kree never change, how all of them are born as monsters and will _stay_ monsters and Carol wished they would see how their thinking really wasn’t different from the Kree’s.

Yon-Rogg hadn’t bothered to defend himself until they started to accuse Carol of treason. It was _his_ crimes they were talking about; she didn’t deserve to get dragged into this.

“I am the monster you think I am,” he slowly said, looking at the terrified children. The younglings on Hala had always loved and looked up to him and although he had expected it, he was still shocked by _how_ afraid they were of him – even with Carol around. They were Skrulls, the next generation of the species he had sworn to fight, to _obliterate,_ the race he had been trained all his life to hate them but looking at them now he only saw himself, the little boy scared of the monster that had taken his mother’s life and was about to end his as well. And he really had become exactly what he had been so afraid of.

“But I’m not here to hurt any of you,” he knew they wouldn’t believe him but he still felt the urge to say it anyway. “I’m unarmed; Carol can easily take me out. There’s nothing to be afraid of.”

As a demonstration Carol let her fist glow up and held it close to him while making sure to not actually touch him: “He’s under my control.”

“He needs to answer for his crimes!” someone exclaimed, joined by several suggestions made by others ranging from court-martial to actual execution. If Carol hadn’t been worried before, she surely would start to be worried now.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Talos suddenly said, surprising not only Carol and Yon-Rogg but the Skrulls as well. “Court? Execution?  I’d love to see him dead but we _need_ him to end the war. We have been trying to do that for generations and now that we may have a chance you want to throw that away for personal revenge?”

“He’s a Kree, dear, he can’t be trust,” Soren insisted, voicing what most of them were thinking.

“Mar-Vell was a Kree as well, and it’s her protection and ship that got us here – to safety.”

“Yes and _he_ killed her.”

“It’s war, Soren. Our hands are filthy too,” he now looked at the crowd to address them. “Trust me, I’d love to murder him right on the spot just like you but I’m willing to set this aside for the possibility of peace. For our children to grow up without the fear they are experiencing right now. And I hope you are willing to do it as well.”

They started to whisper to each other considering what he had just said. Carol wasn’t sure if saying this had been the plan he had promised to come up with or if he made it up on the spot but she was grateful for it either way.

“I will stay with him and never leave his side so you can still feel safe,” she explained.

“And I’ll make sure he’ll never get access to any weapons or communication devices,” Talos added.

Despite their anger they still looked up to both of them and it was this trust and respect that finally led to agreement. Reluctant, yes, but agreement nonetheless.

Carol sighed in relief, nodding and smiling weakly at Talos to express her gratitude. She knew he wasn’t doing it for her or Yon-Rogg but for his people and peace but she was still thankful. The crowd started to break up and go their own ways, parents holding their children close just in case, opening the path for them to go to Talos house.

Yon had expected to stay in the ship with Carol just as they weren’t allowed into Maria’s home but unlike her Talos apparently had more faith in Carol’s protection than she had. Or maybe it was the knowledge of having an entire army behind him that could easily end Yon-Rogg’s life if they wanted to.

The family walked ahead, Soren and Rhena still uncomfortable but now almost happily chatting with Talos. Yon and Carol fell behind to give them space.

“Well, that was a walk in the park.”

“The lion walked in a park?” Yon tried to make sense out of her weird Terran idioms.

“It means it was really easy.”

He recognized the sarcasm without her having to clarify it and nodded in agreement.

“We are getting really good in convincing people not to kill me thanks to all the practice.”

“Which is quite an accomplishment considering we are talking about you,” she smiled, waiting for him to tease her back but he didn’t reply.

They were walking in silence for a while, taking in their surroundings – Yon-Rogg for the first time and Carol to compare the city to when she had last seen it. They were making amazing progress, building trade relations with neighboring planets that had no interest in what they are and where they came from but were glad about the technical knowledge the Skrull would share with them in exchange for goods. Yon had to admit it was a beautiful planet, not his Hala and way too hot for his liking but certainly not the worst place in the universe to end up in.

“Why did you say you are a monster?”

Carol had been thinking about it for a while and instead of beating around the bush like usual she wanted to get straight to the point.

“Oh, _now_ you want to talk,” he grinned. “My nose and shirt would have appreciated that earlier.”

“Don’t change the subject.”

“But I learnt to do it from the best,” Yon replied like he was actually complimenting her.

And even though that was true in a way, Carol was still much better at the game than him. She _always_ had the power to make him give in and bend to her will so while Yon-Rogg would eventually let her change the topic most of the times, _she_ wouldn’t let him do that. And her silence would be enough for him to make him answer her seriously.

“Because I killed many of them,” he didn’t know what exactly she wanted to hear let alone why it seemed to bother her. “Was I supposed to act like their anger was unjustified? That I’m the good twin brother of Yon-Rogg?” It had been a plot twist in one of the films they had seen in the motel and he still wasn’t over how ridiculous it was.

“No,” she held on causing him to do the same. “But you are here to change things, to bring peace to the Kree _and_ Skrull instead of fighting them.”

“Yes.”

“Then why did you say you _are_ a monster?”

“Because I _am_ one, Carol,” he continued walking to end the conversation, avoiding her glance as much as her words. “The present doesn’t change the past.”

She watched him walk for a moment before slowly moving on herself. Perhaps she had been wrong about their reversed dynamic. On Hala he had always build her up whenever she had doubts, he had always made sure to reassure her, to prove her worth not only to others but especially to herself and it was her turn now to do the same for him. But she didn’t know how she could ever convince Yon-Rogg that it wasn’t _him_ who was the monster - it was the Supreme Intelligence and he had just been used by them. Carol knew how it felt like to blame yourself for the evil you have done based on lies but she only had to make peace with six years - Yon-Rogg with his entire life.

And she wasn’t sure if he could ever do that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not to shamelessly advertise myself but I've made some Yonvers fanart in case anyone is interested (https://ghoztdraws.tumblr.com/). Also I'm really happy that so many of you enjoy this story and support it, it really means a lot, thank you! c:


	17. For You

Having to stay together also meant to sleep in the same bed in Talos’ house – or rather the same room as no one _specifically_ told them to share the bed but at this point no one needed to do that any way.

His house, and in fact the entire architecture of their city, was foreign to both of them but having lived among the Skrulls Carol was way more used to it than Yon-Rogg who had to ask what parts of  the furniture and bathroom were for. To her surprise Yon-Rogg not once made a negative comment about the Skrull lifestyle – he didn’t make any _positive_ comments either but that probably was as good as it got with him. Admittedly Carol liked the Kree architecture better so she would have understand his disapprobation but perhaps he was afraid anyone could overhear them and take great offence in his words. Not that the former Kree commander was necessarily scared of the Skrulls but he apparently wasn’t interested in a premature decease – much to her relief.

Despite her promise to be right next to him _the entire_ time Yon stayed with them, she now was standing in front of their room without him so she could spend some time with Rhena, who obviously was too scared to be around her as long as he was there. Carol knew Yon-Rogg would not leave the room, not only because the only way out was the door and one window that was too small for an adult to fit through but also because there simply was no reason for him to break out and discover the city on his own or even leave the planet to run back to the Kree.

She didn’t know what he was doing right now but judging by the lack of noises he probably was meditating while she and Rhena were alone which gave her the perfect opportunity to follow her new objective: Making the Skrull like (or at least accept) Yon-Rogg.

Carol could lie to herself saying she only wanted that as it was beneficial to the plan but even the part of her that _still_ felt bad for trusting him in the first place knew that wasn’t the case. Perhaps she couldn’t make Yon himself stop believing he was a monster but that didn’t mean she was powerless when it came to the opinion of the Skrulls. Maybe it was a bit ruthless to start with a child but knowing she _technically_ wasn’t doing anything bad by making her see the truth made her to it despite her hesitation.

There were several ways she could try to achieve her goal and the first one that came to her mind was convincing Rhena that Yon-Rogg wasn’t as horrible as she believed he was by using her own father as an example. After all he had also killed innocent people, even almost herself and the people she cared about, at some point but making her dad look bad to lift Yon up perhaps wasn’t the smartest idea. Instead she used herself as an example.

“Do you think I’m a monster?” Carol asked cunningly as she sat on the floor next to the child who had just stopped informing her about pretty much everything that had happened during her absence.

Naturally Rhena was confused: “Of course I don’t! Why would I?”

“Because I was on the same side as Yon-Rogg at some point,” she explained and quickly added “Just like Mar-Vell.” for more weight.

“But you were lied to by Yon-Rogg,” Rhena defended.

Carol had tried to hide from her and the other children how upset she had been just after everything went down and while she was successful when it came to the rest of the kids, she had failed with Rhena due to all the time Carol would spend with Talos. Rhena knew how hurt she had been and obviously didn’t forget about it.

“Yes but Mar-Vell hadn’t been and still she was working for the Supreme Intelligence.”

“Because she was lied to by them,” Rhena recalled what her father had told her. “She helped us when she realized what they were doing.”

“That’s exactly what Yon-Rogg is doing right now.”

The child considered what she had just said and although Carol could see Rhena started to process where she was going with this, she was still not completely convinced.

“He… tried to kill mum and dad and me – and all the others…”

It wasn’t like Carol couldn’t understand her fear; she had felt it too for a brief moment in Mar-Vell’s laboratory. She had never seen Yon-Rogg this angry before – especially not with her.  During her time on Hala Yon had barely ever gotten mad at her, no matter how much she had provoked it. He never lost his temper over her teasing him, laughing about him, making _others_ laugh about him, waking him up in the middle of the night, failing her training or questioning his orders. The only instances that made him actually be harsh to her was when she had ignored his command and got herself into danger. No matter if she had gotten herself out of the situation or needed his help for it – he was _always_ furious. And even though he never explicitly said it, she knew his anger wasn’t about her not listening to him per se; it was about him being afraid to lose her.

And perhaps there was the same reason behind his behavior on Mar-Vell’s ship and it only was worse than anything she had ever seen of him before because this time he actually _had_ lost her.

She never had thought about his reactions to her actions a lot before, never paid much attention to the fact that this was the _only_ thing that made him angry with her simply because she assumed it was the leader in him. As the head of the Starforce Yon-Rogg always had a lot of responsibility and unlike the few other Kree commanders she had met he _did_ care about his people and didn’t want to lose any of them. She had assumed he would react in the same way with everyone which she just never got to see because no one except her dared to ignore his orders.

But maybe this specific behavior really was reserved for her.

Or maybe her ego wanted her to believe that.

Either way she nodded to signal she understood where Rhena was coming from: “It could have been me instead, you know? If it was my mission and Talos wouldn’t have made me see the truth.”

That wasn’t completely correct as Carol would have never turned against children, not even Skrull children. She knew Yon-Rogg and other Kree didn’t hesitate because they believed the kids would only grow up to be terrorists themselves but her hatred for the Skrulls simply had never been as great as it had been for everyone who got taught to despise them since their birth.

“You would have tried to kill me?” Rhena asked in disbelief.

“Perhaps.”

She definitely wouldn’t have but saying no would not only throw Yon-Rogg under the bus but also ruin her plan.

The child sat in silence for a while, coming to terms with the fact that the person she saw as a hero might not be so different from the man she thought was a dangerous monster. Or the other way around.

“How about you talk to him yourself? With me, of course. Even if he wanted to he couldn’t harm you when I’m around,” she suggested. “And if you still think he is a terrible person afterwards that’s perfectly fine.”

Due to Rhena’s trust in her and the bravery she got from her father she agreed and followed Carol into her room – however not without hiding behind her at first.

Yon-Rogg got up from the bed, assuming Carol wanted something from him as she had stopped after taking one step into the chamber but when he saw the little Skrull hiding behind her, he held on himself.

“That’s Rhena,” Carol announced when she looked at Yon warningly as if to say _‘Don’t fuck this up’_.

Carol knew Yon-Rogg was good with children. She had watched him interact with them for countless hours on Hala as he was not only a commander, the leader of the Starforce and her mentor but also a teacher. For some reason the Supreme Intelligence had decided _he_ was the perfect candidate for teaching small children basic combat and everything about Hala and the Kree (that they were allowed to know of course) and even though she would like to not agree with the A.I. on anything they _did_ make the right call. He was amazing; patient and kind with the kids yet strict enough for them to still love but not disrespect him – though one could argue them laughing about him whenever Carol had made a joke wasn’t exactly respectful but Yon never had any issue with that.

He kneeled down to be about the same level as her and smiled friendly: “Nice to meet you.”

Rhena was too shy and scared to reply but Yon hadn’t expected her to suddenly fall into his arms anyway. He stayed perfectly still and did his best to look as least threatening as possible.

“You are Carol’s friend, right?”

The child nodded hesitantly.

“I’ve seen you and the other kids with her, she’s really lucky to have so many friends here.”

“We are lucky to have her!” Rhena replied eagerly making Yon-Rogg smile.

“I’m lucky to have her too,” he figured if there was _anything_ they could actually bond over it was their admiration of Carol. “She’s really powerful, isn’t she?”

Rhena took a step forward: “She is! I want to be like her one day!”

He pretended to eye her for a moment before he nodded convinced.

“I’m sure you will be.”

She seemed to take some pride in that.

“Do you want to be like her too?”

He looked at Carol who grinned widely: “Yeah, _do you_?”

Yon-Rogg actually seemed to think about it before he smiled somewhat sadly.

“I wish but I never could, not after what I’ve done,” and not ever in general but especially because of that, he thought.

Looking back at Rhena again he added: “I’m really, really sorry for what I’ve done to you, your family and friends.” Apologizing to her was so much easier than apologizing to Talos. He still didn’t completely trust him on his intentions but she as a child was completely innocent. Something he should have realized so much sooner.

“Carol said you were lied to. Like she and Mar-Vell were.”

“I was… but unlike them I wasn’t clever enough to figure it out,” he admitted, not feeling like him having been lied to was a good excuse for _his_ actions.

“Because he never had anyone help him,” Carol interrupted – not only to defend him but also because it was true. Unlike Mar-Vell he had spent all his life on Hala, was always surrounded by the propaganda and constantly manipulated by the Intelligence.  And Unlike Carol he had no one who could point out a particular lie that made the entire web crumble.

“How did you see the truth then?” Rhena asked curiously.

“Carol helped me,” he explained, smiling again. “As I said, I’m _really_ lucky to have her.”

It wasn’t like Rhena fully trusted him now but she started to understand he might have been not as relentless and horrible as she thought – at least not anymore.

“I know I will never be able to make it up to you,” Yon-Rogg said sincerely. “But if it helps even a little bit you could hit me. As revenge.”

Rhena looked at Carol who was incredibly enthusiastic about the idea: “Yeah just beat him up.”

Reassured by Carol’s hand on her shoulder that reminded her she’d always protect her, she took the last few steps up to Yon-Rogg who was still kneeling on the ground. Hesitantly she formed a fist with her hand that she faintly hit against Yon-Rogg shoulder.

He shook his head: “As hard as you can.”

She tried again, a little bit more forceful.

“He can take a lot, just give him what you have,” Carol told her, wishing she had a camera to film this. Weirdly enough neither Skrulls nor Kree really had any interest in film and photography which she usually didn’t mind but in situations like these surely regretted.

Encouraged Rhena now actually hit him as hard as she managed to and because she couldn’t focus on both the hitting _and_ the aiming she ended up punching him straight into his face.

He made a pained sound – not because he was actually hurt but because it’s what he used to do on Hala when one of his young students managed hit him in the way he had tried to teach them just to give some kind of reward. However when he lifted his hand from his face again, he reveled a left eyes that obviously started to swell. Now Carol _really_ wished she had a camera.

“I’m so sorry!” Rhena cried out, both because she actually was and because she feared Yon-Rogg’s reaction but he just grinned.

“You did amazing; you don’t even need Carol to protect you from anything.”

“You are not mad?” she asked skeptically.

“Of course not, I _told_ you to hit me.”

“But not like-”

“I have done so much worse to him during our trainings sessions, trust me,” Carol raised her hand for a high-five – something she had taught to all the kids. “That was _great_!”

 

 

Soren was a good cook, so great in fact that Carol constantly missed her skills whenever she was floating through space far away from Talos’ family so to finally sit back at her table, presented with what could only be described as a feast, almost seemed like a dream. They had allowed Yon-Rogg to sit next to her instead of banishing him to their room, not because they wanted to be nice to but simply because this way it was easier for all of them to keep an eye on him.

Talos arrived a little bit late as he still had other responsibilities but when he saw Yon’s face, he immediately hated himself for having left the house in the first place.

“What did he do?” he demanded to know, assuming Carol had hit him for misbehaving.

“I- I did that,” Rhena confessed shyly, hoping to calm her father down but he only got more angry.

“What did you do to her?!” Talos grabbed Yon’s collar harshly who much to Carol’s relief he stayed perfectly calm.

“Oh, _now_ you can address me directly,” he mocked instead of de-escalating the situation.

“Nothing!” Rhena had jumped from her chair to pull on Talos’ arm, forcing him to let go of Yon-Rogg’s shirt before Carol got the chance to do help him. “We talked and he apologized and allowed me to hit him.”

Carol knew she probably should have at least asked Talos if it was okay for her to take his daughter to the man who tried to murder all of them but she had already expected the answer to be no. And begging for forgiveness was always easier than asking for permission. She could only hope that he would be mad at her and not Yon who really wasn’t to blame for this at all.

Talos needed a suspenseful moment to process what his daughter told him before bursting into laughter.

“Good! Well done, Rhena,” he praised her, proud his daughter managed to hurt him like that even though he was aware that must have barely been painful for Yon-Rogg and the black eye would fade away in a few hours.

His reaction had already surprised Carol but when he then mumbled a “Sorry” to Yon-Rogg she nearly thought he must be a Skrull. A different one that is.

But no, it was really him. And when she was about to kick the Kree’s shin to make him say something as well, Yon-Rogg had already replied: “It’s alright.”

She eyes him. Perhaps _he_ was the Skrull.

There was no way the two actually decided to behave like adults.

 

 

They hadn’t talked about anything that happened that day before they finally were lying in their bed, unsuccessfully trying to fall asleep immediately as they both were incredibly tired. She bumped her shoulder against his to see if he was still awake and the faint noise he made was enough of an answer.

“How’s your eye?” she didn’t actually wonder, knowing it would be healed by now but she wanted to start the conversation somehow.

“I may lose it,” he replied as dramatic as possible causing her to shrug.

“That’s a shame because your eyes are quite pretty. But I suppose you’ll still have one left, so it’s fine.”

“ _One_ eye but _so many_ children on this planet”, he ignored her compliment, thinking she was just teasing him.

“I should demand money for letting people hit you,” Carol mused, realizing she could probably earn a fortune.

“I’m not your property, Carol.”

“Of course you aren’t - I’d never let anyone touch mine.”

For some reason he actually wished she would have claimed him.

“Thanks for not punching Talos,” Carol continued when Yon-Rogg didn’t say anything but lied perfectly still next to her.

“I really wanted to”, Yon-Rogg stared at the ceiling, already predicting her next question.

“Why didn’t you do it?”

He could have said for the plan or to not escalate the situation, for the peace and the good of all Kree, and Skrull, and it kind of was what Carol was expecting to hear but instead he decided to tell her the truth.

“For you.”

When he had taken her to Hala he knew she would forever be his responsibility - especially after he had saved her life. Neither had been an order, it was his own decision and therefore he would have to take the full blame if something went wrong. Not only was it his task to train her and make sure she wouldn’t end up accidentally killing someone with her powers, he also had to protect _her_ from anyone trying to hurt her. It went both ways. Yes, he had a responsibility towards the Kree first and foremost; the Supreme Intelligence had clearly stated that she would forever be bound to him, not only her victories but also her failures - _especially_ her failures – but he had also always felt responsible for _her_ well-being.

And in the end he had to answer for what she had done as he had failed to do either – to protect the Kree and to protect Carol.

Everything she did against the Kree no matter how small or big was his fault and the Supreme Intelligence would make sure he was constantly aware of that. The punishment he would have to endure every time was already bad enough but the overwhelming guilt he felt was worse. All the Kree dying by her hands had basically died because of him. He never blamed Carol, her safety and well-being was still important to him after all, but he had blamed himself. And still did.

He had never considered saving her a mistake and if he could turn back in time he would do it over and over again.

But there still was the guilt.

And he never wanted her to feel that way about him.

Now Carol was responsible for what _he_ did, she had vowed for him and anything he did would fall back on her. He had seen how the Skrulls unfairly reacted to her for having brought him here and that already concerned him but what worried him even more was the fear he may end up doing something she would blame herself for.

He had to avoid that at any cost.

Carol turned her head to look at him in the dark but his face was still turned towards the ceiling. It wasn’t a reply she had expected to hear and it confused her for a moment until she remembered what Talos had told her.

_I do not doubt how serious he is about you,_

_I doubt how serious he is about stopping the Kree._

And suddenly it made sense.

Maybe he had been right and she _really_ was the true reason he was doing all of this. Maybe he cared more about her than stopping the Kree. Maybe he wanted _her_ in the end - not peace.

And it _should_ worry her.

She _should_ be concerned about his motives and if he would really end up helping them like he was supposed to.

It _should_ occur to her that he may not turn against the Kree when she wasn’t in any immediate danger.

And perhaps she _should_ ask why he had done it for her _not_ their cause.

But all she could think about was how she might matter more to him than everything he had known all his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I already had planed to include Rhena (and other Skrull children) but the fact that Yon-Rogg is canonical good with kids gives me so much life, you have no idea. Bless Marvel.


	18. Cultural Differences

Of course the entire population wouldn’t suddenly fall in love with Yon-Rogg simply because Rhena had overcome her fear of him but at least the children slowly started to lose their hesitation and stopped hiding whenever they saw him. Rhena had become their hero for having punched a Kree commander and instead of being annoyed Yon-Rogg was rather amused watching her brag about how strong she was as the others marveled at her.

The children still weren’t allowed to come close to him but Talos had enough trust in Carol to allow her to spend time with them. Naturally she was more focused on Carol but nonetheless started to really warm to him. And Yon-Rogg started to warm to her as well even though it was still hard for him sometimes. All his life he’s been told the Skrulls are dangerous, their ability a threat to not only the Kree but every other weaker species as well. So watching Rhena transform in front of him to show Carol how great she could sim others already was unsettling at first but when he kept reminding himself over and over again that she was just a harmless child and certainly not a terrorist like he’s been taught, he began getting used to it. It was still weird in a sense as it was so new to him seeing it happen right in front of his eyes but it had stopped being uncomfortable – let alone subconsciously alarming.

“That was really good!” Carol praised cheerfully when Rhena managed to finally sim an animal he had never seen before – a task she had failed yesterday. But with enough perseverance and affirmation from both Carol _and_ Yon, she had eventually managed to do it perfectly.

She was now grinning proudly, looking like herself again. Rhena was too young to keep a transformation up for a longer period of time and also was exhausted from all the tries before but – and he suspected she got that from Carol – she had been too stubborn to simply give up and try it again tomorrow.  The result may have been worth it but now she was sitting down on the ground, obviously tired.

“You alright?” Yon asked, unsure of how to tell when a Skrull was about to faint.

“I’m great!” Rhena smiled. It didn’t sound like a lie, more like she didn’t realize how worn out she was – or like she was too obstinate to admit to herself that she couldn’t train for hours without using all of her energy.

She reminded him a lot of his own kids – the students he had taught on Hala. Some of them were just as eager to succeed, forcing Yon-Rogg to _order_ them to stop training and take a break. It always took them a while to learn that acknowledging their limits wasn’t a weakness but a strength that allowed them to respect but still work on these boundaries. And often times they never learnt it at all. Rhena seemed to be one of those people and Yon was sure that was due to Carol’s influence.

Of course Carol only meant well by keeping to encourage her and perhaps she knew Rhena’s limitations better than him but to call him a ‘killjoy’ when he suggested to at least take a break really wasn’t helping in her in any way.

Either way she had now reached her goal and decided to call it a day on her own.

Carol, who saw that Rhena had overworked herself, suggested to carry her back home and quickly added “Because it’s out last day together.” to make sure she could take the offer without admitting to her weakness.

The child gladly accepted so they made their way back to their house through the jungle-like forest and city that was still partly under construction. The other Skrulls happily smiled at Carol and Rhena while completely ignoring Yon-Rogg but at least they weren’t starring at him angrily which all three of them saw as a progress.

When they arrived they immediately got greeted by the smell of the feast Soren and a few other Skrulls were preparing for the goodbye- or perhaps rather _good-luck_ -festival they would be celebrating for Carol, Talos and the few Skrulls that were accompany them. And Yon-Rogg of course but it wasn’t like anyone cared about doing something for him. He was just there as well.

They had prepared everything they could for their plan except for a few (rather important) details they couldn’t do on this planet as it could give their location away so everyone agreed on working on them in space. It always hurt Carol a bit to say goodbye to everyone since she never knew when she could see them again but she was also more than ready to finally stop the Supreme Intelligence and end this unjustified, and especially uneven, war.

Yon-Rogg certainly was happy to be able to leave again but she wasn’t so sure about his willingness to face the Intelligence and other Kree who’d naturally try to stop them. Talos words had left an impact on her since she realized Yon may really have chosen her over his god. She wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt, especially since he was really engaged while they were planning their final steps and didn’t seem to hesitate at all – but after all she had already trusted Yon-Rogg twice and _both_ times didn’t work out too well for her.

And just as she couldn’t shake off the doubt, she also couldn’t shake off the realization she had a few nights ago.

She signaled Yon to follow her once she had put Rhena down who immediately ran to her father to tell him about her progress. They went upstairs to their bedroom and he didn’t think of her behavior as weird at all until she ordered him to sit down on the bed while she’d leave the room for a few seconds. He still followed her instructions but looked at her skeptically.

“What’s with that face?”

“The last time you told me to wait somewhere while you vanished out of my visual field you tried to sneak up on me to start and attack while my guard was down,” he explained, frowning at her.

“What do you mean tried? I _did_ attack you.”

“But failed the surprise part of it miserably,” he reminded her but she pretended like she didn’t hear him while leaving the room.

“This is a _much_ better surprise!”

He sighed, wondering if she still hadn’t learnt her lesson – which certainly wouldn’t be new for her – but waited dutifully. It only took her a few moments before she, still outside, told him to close his eyes and he was about to nag but decided to just follow her instruction to get done with whatever she was doing.

“Are they closed?”

“Yes.”

“Really?”

“ _Yes_ , Carol.”

She opened the door slightly, sticking her head through the orifice to check if he was _really_ telling the truth and stepped full into the room when she saw he was doing exactly as she said. Carol knew he must have thought of the whole thing as ridiculous so the fact that he still executed her orders – even more or less without complaining - made her somewhat proud.

Standing in front of him she told him to open his eyes again and almost apologized for not having wrapped the present before she remembered that wrapping paper wasn’t a thing on Hala anyway. He opened his eyes, blinking against the sudden light, and looked directly at an almost perfect replica of the Starforce suit he used to wear.

Yon-Rogg didn't know what to say.

“I know it’s not perfect but the best you will get unless we manage to somehow steal your old one,” Carol stated simply to say something as she wasn’t used to complete speechlessness from her former commander.

"Thank you... so much,” he finally managed to say. “You didn't have to-"

"I can't have you dying on me within five seconds on the battle field," she trailed off but Yon shook his head.

"It didn't have to be _that_ suit."

Carol knew how important it still was to him – no matter what his opinion on the Kree was. After all she could relate it a lot had she stayed with her own too; though she had kept it more due to the technological advantages that came along with it rather than nostalgia.

"I just don't know how to make other suits."

It was a lie and Yon-Rogg knew that but he wouldn't further beset her about this. Instead he gladly took it, looking at every inch of it carefully.

“It’s perfect,” he admired. “Though I’m surprised you didn’t change the colors.”

Carol grinned. She had thought about doing that but it almost felt like a violation, like she was _forcing_ him to follow her instead of the Kree and that simply wasn’t what she wanted. Yon-Rogg didn’t need another Supremor to follow but rather a friend to fight along with.

“You look better in green,” she replied. “Also I already changed your star, that’s enough.”

He had noticed the chest wasn’t featuring his own but hers which he completely understood as it must have been way easier for her to imitate the one she had already around than remembering how his star looked.

“They were almost the same anyway.”

Yon carefully folded the suit on his lap when he had finished inspecting it.

“When did you have the time to even do this?” he wondered since they had spent most of their time right next to each other.

“On Talos’ ship. Him denying you access to most rooms was quite useful for me.”

Yon-Rogg knew how much work it was to build this, fixing their suits already took an enormous amount of time so making a new one from scratch must have taken her most, if not the _entire_ , way from Earth to this planet.

He had been an idiot, thinking she rather spent time with the other Skrulls when in reality she was working on this. _For him_.

He couldn’t believe she had invested so much time into this.

And he desperately wished he could give her something, _anything_ in return but had nothing. Nothing that would be worthy of her, of course, but also really nothing at all.

At least not right now.

Yon-Rogg tried it on – much to Carol’s disappointment in the bathroom and not in front of her – before they both left to attend the festival that slowly started to form itself in the streets.  It was completely different from the festivals both of them knew from their home planets but by now Carol was used to the exotic food and sometimes to them weird traditions and Yon was at least open-minded enough to not complain about anything.

Music played a huge role as well and thanks to their stay on Mar-Vell’s ship and Carol they could not only play their own festive songs but also a few from Earth. It made no difference to Yon-Rogg as he neither understood Skrull nor Terran music but hearing songs from her previous life meant a lot to Carol he knew that. And from their time on Hala he _also_ knew how distracted she could get dancing and singing along and instead of doing the usual gazing in awe at her, he decided to take the opportunity to quickly talk to Rhena without her knowledge.

Much to his surprise the child didn’t hesitate in walking over to him as he waved her closer and even though Talos saw it and warningly looked at Yon, he also didn’t say a word. She gave him exactly the information he needed and he could even convince her to participate in his plan.

When the next song started and Carol’s attention was fully focused on Rhena who had asked her to be her partner in the traditional Skrull dance, Yon-Rogg smoothly slipped away and vanished for a few minutes and before any of the celebrating Skrulls or Carol had noticed his absence, he was already back as if he had never left.

After Carol had happily made her way up to him and he commented on her excitement, she was already pulling on his sleeve.

“C’mon, it’s only polite to join _at least_ one dance,” she tried dragging him to dance floor but Yon-Rogg didn’t move at all.

“It’s only polite to let go of me.”

“I will if you follow me.”

“I would follow you anywhere, Carol,” he said honestly. “But not over there.”

“Killjoy,” she pouted if only to not overthink his first statement.

“ _Exactly_. So better get away from me before I ruin all your fun.”

She grinned smugly.

“ _Carol,_ ” he warned her but it was too late. She was already using her strength to force him follow her by pulling on his arm and before he got the chance to further complain, they were already in the middle of dancing Skrulls, who still didn’t accept Yon but ignored him which worked well enough.

“I’m _not_ dancing,” he insisted and for a moment she had the mental imagine of shooting at his feet several times to make him dance anyway like she had seen in cartoons when she was a child but decided against it.

“You really need to get that stick out of your ass.”

“The what?”

She rolled her eyes as if it was his fault he didn’t know English idioms.

“Let some fun in your life.”

“I was already having plenty of fun over there, thank you,” he was about to make his way back through the crowd. “Besides, I don’t know this dance anyway and I’m sure the _actual_ impolite thing would be to disgrace it by trying to badly imitate it.”

“I can teach it to you!” Rhena suddenly stood next to them, obviously supporting her friend Carol.

He glared at Carol who happily encouraged Rhena to do that and even though he was a fully grown Kree who had no obligation to listen to a Skrull, let alone a Skrull child, he still couldn’t say no to her.

“Okay, fine,” he mumbled, adding a comment about how awful it will be but otherwise stayed perfectly silent when he started to mimic her movements.

Carol could tell he was somewhat uncomfortable and almost felt sorry for him but seeing how concentrated he was as he tried his best to do exactly what Rhena wanted from him was too good to put an end to.

More and more Skrulls started to pay attention to them, unsure of what to make out of the situation and Carol was worried it would only further embarrass Yon-Rogg but he was way too focused on the child and his own movements to notice. And even more surprising: He actually started to have fun.

And he was good. At least good for someone who never dances and now tried to learn the traditional dance from a different culture – one he had once promised to destroy.

She knew the Supreme Intelligence wasn’t an _actual_ god, no omniscient being that had any power outside the Kree territory, but for a moment she wished they were – just so they could see their former best warrior dancing happily with a Skrull child.

When Yon was confident enough in his movements and didn’t need Rhena to remember them anymore, the child quickly dragged Carol over to take her place who secretly gave her a thumbs up before she ran over to her friends.

“See,” Carol teased, gently fist bumping his arm. “I _knew_ you would enjoy it.”

“Shut up,” he tried to hide his smile but didn’t stop moving. “I’m just being polite.”

“Of course you are.”

They didn’t know if it was due to Rhena’s impact or, simply because you can barely be afraid of someone who’s dancing but a few of her friends had come up to them and asked if they could join in. At first Yon-Rogg was worried their parents wouldn’t be happy about it but no one dragged the kids away or told them to stop so perhaps they had at least accepted he wasn’t a threat anymore – something that would normally hurt his ego but he had too much fun with the children and Carol to actually think about it.

After a few more songs the feast, the final part of the festival, started and while no one necessarily fought to sit next to Yon-Rogg, Soren, who a few days earlier was about to kill him, actually smiled honestly while handing him his plate and that was already more than Carol had expected from their stay.

“This tastes unusual but _much_ better than your pizza,” Yon commented, unable to hide a grin.

“You know, I was about to forgive you but now you really crossed the line.”

He laughed when she hit him and even the last Skrulls who were still wary of him started to realize he probably wasn’t the monster they had expected him to be.

The party slowly started to break up as the evening turned into the night but before they joined the Skrulls who in heading back home, it was Yon-Rogg’s turn to tell Carol to follow him which she did however more out of curiosity than obedience since she didn’t _have_ to listen to him anymore.

“Where are you kidnapping me to this time,” she joked as she walked with him through the small alley between two houses.

“You would have died if I wouldn’t have taken you with me,” he reminded her.

“Still kidnapping,” she grinned, hoping he actually understood she wasn’t mad at him when he suddenly stopped and turned around.

“Close your eyes.”

“I don’t think closing my eyes while standing with a potentially dangerous man in a dark alley is the best idea but-”

“Carol.”

“Okay, okay.”

Patience wasn’t her strong suit and she almost peeked at him while she heard something rustle but had enough control over herself to wait for another few seconds until he allowed her to open her eyes again.

“It's nothing compared to the suit,” Yon apologized, feeling awful about his gift even though he knew he didn’t really have anything else to offer. “But-”

"You got me,” she took the bouquet out of his hands. “Flowers?"

“I asked Rhena which ones are poisonous to not accidentally kill you.”

“When did you-”

“Let’s say you don’t do the best job of keeping an eye on me when you’re having fun.”

She stared at his present in disbelief for a moment.

“Thank you but… why flowers?”

He almost looked away but stood his ground.

“You said Terrans give those to people who mean a lot to them.”

Carol remembered having mentioned it carelessly when she jokingly suggested ways in which Yon-Rogg could apologize to Talos but she would have never expected for him to keep that in mind. Let alone get _her_ flowers one day.

She didn’t know if there was a correct way to react to his words or if he expected her to react in a certain way but – while making sure the flowers won’t get damaged in the process – she hugged him as it was the first thing that came to her mind.

“That’s another thing we humans do with people who mean a lot to us,” she explained although she was aware he knew what a hug was as they had hugged before.

He returned her embrace and even though she couldn’t see his face she knew by the tone of his voice that he was smiling.

“Do you also make battle suits as a sign of your gratitude?”

“Perhaps.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long but the digital release came out so I was busy making like 400 Yonvers gifsets and a fluff video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ILtLghsvUxo).
> 
> I planned to do an angsty video first (because let's be real it's an angsty ship) but the deleted scene in which Yon talks to the SI? What the fuck? Like, thanks Marvel for making Yon-Rogg being in love with Carol canon but? I didn't need? To see this horrible abuse? Yon-Rogg has to go through? All the time?  
> Anyway, can you believe we all wanted Yon to have a redemption arc in which he chooses Carol over the SI when he already did that in the film? I love him? He's such a fool in love I just...  
> His weird cold behavior on Mar-Vell's ship when he sees Carol now actually makes sense and the fact the he refuses to fight her in the end gets so much better (for the ship) and worse (for him, because holy fuck I knew the SI would treat him horribly for this but apparently they already abused him when he's still on their side, what the hell).  
> Like on one hand I'm glad it was cut out because it was really hard to watch the first few times but it would have improved the film so much and even the directors wanted it to be in so why wasn't it? Why hurt your own film like that and do Yon-Rogg so dirty, Marvel? I will fight you (and the SI).


	19. Alone Together

Despite having spent quite some time with the Skrulls now, having even lived among them, Yon-Rogg _still_ hadn’t gotten used to it. They were so different from the Kree, not only in their appearance and abilities but also in their culture – and language, though this wasn’t much of a problem. He would have felt bad for avoiding them as much as possible, after all they were their allies and also, almost more importantly, Carol’s friends, if the Skrulls weren’t so relieved by reluctance. Because, to be fair, despite all the time they had spent with him, the Skrulls hadn’t gotten used to his presence yet either.

He was sitting alone in a smaller part of the ship that usually seemed to be used as a storeroom but was, due to the different nature of their mission, completely empty right now. Yon wanted some time for himself, partly because he wasn’t too keen on hanging around the other Skrulls and partly because being on his own had been something he always enjoyed on Hala – at least until he knew Vers. Going out and wasting all his free time and money by using the various distractions lower Hala had to offer was never something he was particularly interested in. Dull and uneventful, that’s how he would have described his ideal evening, not being surrounded by strangers and loud noises. Of course he had visited different bars from time to time but only because Vers had asked him to come along. Back then he would agree hesitantly, telling her he was doing it to keep an eye on her so she wouldn’t end up accidentally burning something down but the truth was he had always liked to spend time with her. He liked being her company, being _in_ her company – though he often pretended to be something between neutral and mildly annoyed depending on where they went.

 Still, even during those six years he had have a lot of time just for himself – significantly less than he had before Carol came into his life yet definitely more than most other Kree his age and status. He was a man of action and used to the rush of the battlefield but, or maybe _because_ of that, he enjoyed the quietness of his apartment. It was a place where he had no responsibility, where he didn’t have to take care of anyone and could just exist.

It was ironic, really, that even though his desire to have some time on his own was still there, he now desperately _wanted_ to take care of someone.

He breathed out heavily and leaned his head back against the wall to stare up at the ceiling. Yon-Rogg had studied the ship they were using and had the rough outline imprinted in his memory so he knew exactly what the room above him was in use for. Originally it was some kind of canteen where workers could get a meal during their break and just relax for a while before they had to get back to shift. The purpose it had right now was similar only that no one working on here had an actual schedule and therefore also no breaks but whenever someone would have the time to or simply needed something to eat, they would go there.

Yon-Rogg wondered if Carol was currently taking a break, hoping it in fact as she had been working non-stop since they left the Skrulls’ home planet. All of them had, Talos and him as well, but Carol took it to a whole new extreme, even abandoning sleep as she worked through records and blueprints. It were times like these where he wished he was still her commander and could _force_ her to rest – not that Vers had the best track record of actually listening to him but when it came to her own safety and well-being he usually managed to stand his ground and make her follow his orders.

Now Carol didn’t have to listen to anyone and while he thought this was exactly what she deserved, to be her own person, to be free, he also wanted _someone_ to finally make her take a break – or for her to become a bit more self-aware of what her body, as strong as it may be, needed.

Even as Vers, when she still wasn’t used to her powers and much weaker, she’d always push herself beyond her limits, especially during their training. Yon admired her stubbornness and considered it her strength – after all she had refused to give up back at the lake when they had seen each other for the first time even though he clearly had the upper hand which led to her getting these powers to begin with – but he also recognized it was her biggest weakness.

Her endurance and tendency to always get back up again was what had gotten her this far in life but everyone, even her, had their final limitation and to not listen to the signs your body sends you as a warning was dangerous. During their sparring Yon-Rogg would always notice these signs and stop her before she overworked herself and just as he had wondered it back then, he still wasn’t sure if Carol simply didn’t _see_ those signals or just refused to pay attention to them. Knowing her it probably was the latter.

Perhaps he should have just stayed quiet and know his place but he still suggest taking a pause to her– which wasn’t met with a whole lot of understanding.

Maybe it had been his wording or maybe she was just overly sensitive as she was clearly – to him at least – tired, either way she was mad at him for daring to tell her what to do.

Which he didn’t. Or maybe he had done that but not in a way she thought he did.

Carol hadn’t said anything, let alone had an argument with him but the way she had behaved around him since that point had told him she didn’t want see him anymore. He respected that but also couldn’t help but to get a little bit irritated himself.

It had been her stubbornness he had grown so fond of but right now it just annoyed him.

His anger, if one could even call it that, had only lasted from their conversation to when he had reached this room however. Now, he was only worried again but tried to get his mind occupied with thinking about things he could actually change instead of hanging on to running against this wall called Carol Danvers.

But there wasn’t really anything else he wanted to think of.

Carol was pretty much the only pleasant though he had left at this point.

He didn’t want to think of Hala, the place he was born at and called his home, a place he had been proud to be a part of. He didn’t want to think of his former rank of a hero, something he had never been to begin with, a title he clearly never deserved. And he _certainly_ didn’t want to think of the Supreme Intelligence.

Yon-Rogg hit the back of his head against the wall.

_He had been so stupid._

_So incredibly stupid._

There must have been signs, any signals that had told him to hold on and realize what they were doing. Something that told him they weren’t the noble warrior heroes he had always believed they were.

Had he really been that blind? Or had he chosen not to see it?

He didn’t know and didn’t matter.

He was disgusted with himself either way.

About to hit his head again, more out of frustration with himself than really due to an urge to hurt himself, he held on mid-motion as he heard the faint noise of the door opening. Company was really the last thing he wanted right now – distraction perhaps, yes. But not someone bothering him.

“There you are.”

 _Of course_ , out of everyone on the ship, it _had_ to be her.

“What are you doing here?”

“It’s nice to see you too,” Carol grinned half-heartedly. “I missed you as well.”

He wanted to roll his eyes but also feared to annoy now that she seemed to want to be near him again so he controlled himself and simply looked at her. She looked miserable.

Carol’s passion and eagerness when working on something she truly believed in has always been something he loved about her and even though he _really_ wished she would finally rest, he still admired her for it. However the exhaustion really started to exact its toll. She was tired and at this point it _certainly_ was impossible for her to not realize it herself. Yet she refused to rest – maybe even out of despite now. Because he had _told_ her to take a break.

“What do you want?” he tried again, hoping she would finally tell him why she had been looking for him. Having a conversation would hopefully stop him from bothering her any further about her health.

“Do I need a reason to look for you?”

He smiled: “Considering you took the time out of your busy schedule, yes, you do.” It sounded more passively aggressive than he had intended it to.

Unlike him she didn’t hesitate to roll her eyes.

“I was just wondering what you are up to.”

Yon-Rogg frowned.

“What did you think I’m doing?”

He was hurt. Did she still not trust him to be alone because it could make it possible for him to contact the Empire?

“Nothing,” she replied sincerely, calming him down a bit. “I was just wondering why you weren’t around.”

“Was there an important meeting I missed?” he raised a brow, not remembering anything in his schedule.

“No, I meant,” she walked closer to him.  “Why you weren’t around… me.”

“Aw. You really _did_ miss me,” he grinned, not actually believing in what he said.

“I’m just used to your presence by now,” she waved off, making him realize he was actually right.

“I didn’t think you wanted me around,” Yon-Rogg admitted a bit taken aback.

“I just don’t like people telling me what to do,” Carol shrugged, looking away from him at nothing in particular.

“I didn’t- Well, yes, I did. But you _are_ exhausted and _do_ need a break.”

Yon-Rogg didn’t want to anger her again but if making her mad at him was the price he would have to pay to make her get some well-deserved rest then so be it. She wasn’t angry per se but looked like she was offended by his statement that simply displayed the obvious truth.

“I’m perfectly fine, thank you.”

“ _Carol_.”

His tone made her hold on. It wasn’t the kind of tone he would use on Hala whenever he lectured her about control and emotions – it was what he sounded like whenever he was concerned. She didn’t reply.

“Look,” Yon-Rogg began, trying to reason with her one last time.  “I don’t want to fight you-”

“You would lose anyway.”

“I don’t want to fight you,” he started again yet couldn’t hide his smile. “But you should _really_ rest for a moment. I know you hate listening to others but-”

She opened her mouth, about to contradict again, but he quickly continued.

“ _But_ we need you at full health for this mission and by overworking yourself you’ll only end up being useless – which _surely_ isn’t what you want.”

Carol now stood directly in front of him, looking down and crossing her arms.

“Is that why you told me to take a break? For the mission?”

For a moment he wanted to say yes but he saw no point in lying to her. And he didn’t _want_ to lie to her either.

“No,” he confessed. “I’m just worried about you.”

She didn’t say anything.

“I know how strong you are – you are probably the strongest person in the universe – but even you need some sleep from time to time.”

Still nothing.

“I hate seeing you like this. I know this is not about me however you-“

Before he even realized what she was doing, he suddenly felt her weight next to him as she leaned against his body and placed her head on his shoulder.

“Better?” she asked with a hint of mischief in her voice but he could tell how tired she actually was.

“I’d prefer you lying in a bed but I take what I can get.”

They were quiet for a while and Yon-Rogg hoped she had fallen asleep but she spoke up again.

“I know you only mean well…”

He turned his head to her carefully without giving her any less space on his shoulder.

“I just don’t like being reminded of my limitations,” it came out as a whisper, like she didn’t want to be this vulnerable around him.

“Thankfully you barely have any,” he joked though it was the truth.

“I really want this to work…” Carol explained referring to the plan they had been developing for weeks now. “Maybe that’s the only chance we’ll ever get.”

Yon-Rogg only nodded: “You always refused to fail at something.”

He felt, not without some slight disappointment, her lifting her head again and turned fully towards her. She was still exhausted of course but there also was something else on her face. Something he couldn’t quite define.

“This is different.”

“It’s personal.”

Carol would be eager to bring down any Empire or general menace that threatened universal peace, he knew that, but she had a history with the Kree – and the Supreme Intelligence. Even after she had just discovered the truth about her past she had already told him she will put an end to all of this, that she will end the war and the lies. Back then he hadn’t completely understood her, thinking they were the heroes, that he was on the right side – but he had never forgotten about it. And it all made sense now.

She wasn’t just trying to end a war, to help the Skrulls and whatever other weak nations. Naturally she was also seeking revenge for what they – him included – have done to her. Carol was never one for vengeance – at least not during the times he had known her as Vers – but he knew, or believed to know, how hurt she still was. Rightfully.

They, _he_ , had stolen six years of her life and forced her to participate in a war she wasn’t involved in.

And now they needed to pay for that. All of them.

“Yes,” Carol admitted. “We need to stop them. For me, for you, for Talos, for the entire universe.”

“For me?” Yon asked confused, meeting her gaze.

“Of course for you too,” she said in a tone that suggested she was stating the obvious. “The Supreme Intelligence fucked you up as well; you are just as much of a victim as I am. Or any other Kree for that matter.”

He smiled gently but shook his head: “I’m really not-”

Carol pressed a finger onto his lips to stop him from speaking any further.

“ _Don’t_.”

She knew simply hindering Yon-Rogg to say it out loud wouldn’t impede thinking the exact same thing but she neither was will to argue with him nor simply acquiesce in his guilt. Accepting his own liability in this _without_ blaming himself for literally everything would be a long process for him and not something they could achieve in one single conversation. They would have to talk about it, a lot, over and over again. But not right now. Not here anyway.

“What do you think about involving Rhomann Dey in this?” she asked, mainly to change the topic but also because she has been wondering about it for a while and wanted to know Yon’s outlook on this. As she expected, his eyes widened.

“The Xandarian?” he questioned sharply, more in regards to her sanity not due to being unsure about the man’s identity.

“Nova Corp,” Carol nodded. “He helped us once already so-”

During their time in the Starforce they once had been sent onto a mission to steal the plans for a weapon they could use to end the war between Xandar and Hala - a scheme the Supreme Intelligence and the Nova Prime had worked on together. Dey had been ordered to help them and Yon-Rogg was – despite his distrust of Xandarians – truly thankful for what he had done for Vers but inaugurating him or Xandar in general, especially considering involving the Skrulls was already such a risk to the Kree, was out of question.

“He helped the Nova Prime, Carol, followed her orders,” bewildered he was about to stand up but her sudden grip on his sleeve pulled him back down.

“I know you don’t trust Xandarians but maybe we could even involve the Nova Prime herself! A powerful ally is exactly what we need. And she has already proven she isn’t interested in carnage - after all there is a peace treaty on its way.”

“Precisely,” Yon didn’t even try to loosen her hand to get away from her. “Why would they risk their peace after a war that lasted for centuries and cost so many lives? It was already hard enough to even get to this point.”

She considered what he had said. Having the Nova Prime on their side would be incredibly helpful and make a lot of things easier but he was right, of course. Involving her – or even just attempting to involve her – could either lead to them getting discovered by the Supreme Intelligence before they could even begin executing their plan or to another war. And sacrificing the lives of Xandarians was the last thing she wanted.

“Yeah, I guess…” she admitted; now suddenly feeling like her suggestion was ridiculous, thinking she shouldn’t have brought it up at all.

His face softened.

“I always liked your optimism,” he conceded sincerely as he completely understood her train of thought. “Even if it got you in trouble quite a lot.”

“That was once or twice,” Carol trailed off, making his smile turn into a grin.

“Counting never was your strong suit.”

“Shut up,” she tried her best to hide a smile.

“Oh, _now_ you can tell me to shut up instead of getting physical?” Yon-Rogg mocked, now getting up for real as her hand didn’t hold onto him anymore. It was meant as an invitation for Carol to follow him which she understood well enough - however out of despite she refused to stand up too.

“Do you _want_ me to get physical?”

“I want you to go to sleep,” he got back to his original point, now unafraid of Carol mistaking his genuine worry for paternalism.

“Make me,” Carol said defiant, causing Yon to smile amusedly instead of getting annoyed with her.

“Pretty sure I would win in a fight against you in your current state.”

“Ha!” she exclaimed triumphantly as if him saying that was her goal along. “So you admit you cannot defeat me otherwise.”

“I didn’t say that.”

“Yes, you did!”

Instead of replying and taking this any further he offered her his hand.

“Can you walk?”

“Since I was one year old.”

For a moment she thought he wouldn’t recognize her teasing and misinterpret it as an actual answer to his question but his wide grin told her he understood her true intentions.

“That’s how late you Terrans learn how to walk? Or were you just a late bloomer?”

She tried to kick him playfully as he was out of reach for a hit however due to her slow and tired movement he could easily avoid any contact. He offered his hand once again but Carol still refused to take it - at this point not because she was against the idea of getting some rest but to simply see how far he will go.

“Very well.”

Shrugging as he withdrew his hand he made her believe he was about to give up but instead he crouched down and sighed.

“Last chance.”

“Or what?” Carol asked entertained, raising a brow.

The answer came with Yon-Rogg reaching out to her, carefully pushing one arm behind her back and one under her legs and before she managed to realize what he was doing and protest, he had already lifted her up, ready to carry her to bed.

“Why would you-”

“ _Make me_ ,” he echoed her earlier words which Carol never believed for him to take to heart.

She wanted to tell him to let her down but the fear of him really following her order made her not say a word. He didn’t necessarily need to know she was actually quite enjoying this but he also didn’t necessarily have to _stop_.

Almost naturally she leaned her head against his shoulder, suddenly feeling overwhelmed by how tired and exhausted she was as his slow and even pace resulted in a small rocking.

The lack of resistance surprised him had he expected her to insisting on walking herself but he couldn’t say he minded caring her. In fact, it even made him proud. She was allowing herself a moment of vulnerability around him and, more importantly, allowed him to care for her.

It was something she had never done as Vers, not on purpose.

And it was way more than he had ever dared to hope for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry this took so long! The heat was killing me and I got kinda busy in real life and also wrote ridiculously long tumblr posts about Captain Marvel that took way too much of my time and energy lmao but I'll try to get the next chapter done sooner!  
> I also got the Blu-Ray now (it won't get released in my country until mid-July so I had to import it from the States, I have never spend this much money on a stupid disc, what am I doing with my life) to make Yonvers videos in the best possible quality (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UkC9nDFAyrs)!!
> 
> Also that Rohmann Dey plot is a part of 'Starforce on the Rise'! Vers is separated from the team on that mission, gets badly injured by a Skrull and probably wouldn't make it out alive if he wouldn't help her.


	20. Our Future

“Att-Lass?”

“No.”

“Bron-Char?”

“No.”

“Korath?”

“Definitely not.”

Carol sighed as she threw the tablet back onto the table, a little bit more forceful than she had intended to. She knew it wasn’t his fault, that it _absolutely_ wasn’t his fault, but she still started to get slightly annoyed with him. Of course it was better he said ‘no’ instead of agreeing to involve someone who could potentially endanger their entire mission but clearly there _had_ to be at least one person he had a little bit of faith in.

“Is there really _no one_ you trust?” she questioned, unjustified angry.

Yon-Rogg smiled gently, understanding of her frustration.

“I trust you.”

Hearing this under different circumstances would have made her incredibly proud and happy, especially as Vers when she felt like her commander underestimated her will to be in the Starforce and serve the Empire, but right now this didn’t get them anywhere.

“Anyone else you trust who _isn’t_ in this room?”

“No.”

Theatrically she buried her faces in her hands, mumbling something to no one in particular. Just like with any mission the lack of support made their plan more and more complicated. As the elite warriors on Hala both of them were used to complex, to impossible even, but back then they also were a well-coordinated team that had worked together for years and still had the support of the entire Kree Empire – as long as they didn’t fail that was. However now it was just them and a couple of Skulls – who, while being incredibly helpful so far also had their limits in what they could do.

Before either of them could pick up the conversation again the door to the conference room slid open with a faint noise to give Talos space to enter.

“How is it going?”

“Wonderfully,” Carol replied, her voice muffled due to her hands. “Couldn’t be any better.”

The Skrull’s glance wandered from her to Yon-Rogg, who sat across the table and was by far more collected than she was, obviously not sharing her distress - he even seemed unemotional which was a surprise considering the nature of their plan. But Talos also had to admit Kree were often very hard to read and he was no exception to the rule.

“No luck?” it was more of an observation than an actual question.

“We are on our own.”

Talos sat down, leaning back as he expected some resistance from him: “We’ll have to use some traders or soldiers then.”

Yon grunted, obviously not thrilled at the thought yet he also didn’t suggest something else. He knew Talos was right and that this was the only way but he still would have rather involved someone the Skrulls could sim with their consent. Kidnapping a Kree and stealing their identity was something he desperately had tried to avoid however they didn’t have much of a choice.

“We will not harm them,” Yon said in a commanding tone, not accepting any other opinion on this. If he had to give in to this part of the plan they would have to play by his rules.

Talos grinned.

“If they are traders, fine. But I can’t and won’t make sure a bunch of Kree soldiers are having a great time on this ship.”

Carol had lifted her head at this point, knowing how dangerously close the two of them were to a fight. Talos was her friend but she had much less influence on him than on Yon-Rogg, who was essentially willing to bend to her will, so she looked at _him_ warningly. It was a warning that got ignored however.

Yon-Rogg glared at Talos.

“Listen,” he began, calmer than she had expected. “If you want to make people, _Kree_ , believe you are the good guys, hurting some of them to illegally enter their home planet isn’t doing you any favors.”

She looked at the Skrull now, unable to argue with anything Yon had just said. He may be the one who listened to her but he clearly was in the right and had to be sided with.

Talos seemed to understand that as well, giving them a shrug as a sign of his defeat.

“Now that we settled that,” she suddenly was very enthusiastic and full of zest for action. “Where do we get us some Kree?”

Yon-Rogg leaned over the table to pull the tablet towards him, opening a holographic star map that lit up the entire room. She had gotten used to the advanced technology the universe had to offer by now, especially after having lived on Hala for six years, but it still amazed her every time.

“Good starting positions would be here, here, and here,” he pointed at several planets. “Lots of traffic, little security.”

“Is it common practice for Kree to teach their warriors about their safety flaws?” Talos asked, more sarcastic than anything but also genuinely wondering as Yon-Rogg didn’t even have to _think_ about where they could find the perfect ship hijack.

“It’s nothing more than a personal observation,” Yon explained a lit bit offended by the suggestion the Empire was this stupid. “A good warrior always knows about the weakest links in their defense against the enemy.”

“And you didn’t tell your superiors about those weaknesses?” skeptically Talos frowned, still not fully trusting Yon-Rogg and willing to do anything to not let his men and Carol run straight into a Kree trap.

Now Yon-Rogg was fully offended by the implication of incompetence regarding his species. He may be on the side of a few Skrulls in this conflict, though he preferred to think he was on Carol’s side first and foremost, but that didn’t mean he had to agree with their narrow-minded views.

“Of course they are aware of them; they just lack the resources to cover them. _Besides_ ,” he replied and added scoffing. “The lack of finesse and skill of _your_ people had never made it necessary to mend them.”

“How would you know? Perhaps we have already infiltrated your precious Hala,” Talos retorted, glaring angry at the Kree.

“ _When_ you two are finished with your dick-measuring contest,” Carol raised her voice before Yon-Rogg could even think of a reply. “Could we _please_ get back to the topic?”

Both of them were equally confused by the expression she had used but followed her wishes.

“Which planet is the closest?” Talos asked, still with disapprobation in his voice.

“This one,” Yon spun the map around, ignoring any form of provocation – more so to please Carol than preserve peace. “However _this_ one is better suited for our needs.”

The hologram transformed into the image of a planet and its inhabitants, as well as a few close-ups of the landscape and cities. Typing a few more commands a route on the planet’s surface appeared which Yon’s fingers were following now.

“N'az possesses two highly popular markets, either would be a good target to locate Kree merchants.”

Carol eyed the images carefully.

“What’s the difference between the two?”

“One is legal,” he said as one end of the line lit up. “And one isn’t.”

“The black market,” she rubbed her hands together, realizing this was _exactly_ what they needed. Yon-Rogg however frowned slightly as he looked from her to the image of the trading port, wondering what she was talking about.

“There is nothing black about it.”

“It just means it’s illegal,” Carol explained, unable to hide a grin. On Hala it had always irritated her that no one else seemed to comprehend her phrases since she didn’t understand why her vocabulary was so different from anybody else’s. But now it just amused her.

Ignoring the language barrier, Talos nodded understandingly.

“The disappearances of some dealers from there will less likely get noticed immediately which gives us a lot more time to get to the Empire unobtrusively.”

To defend his original point of why _both_ markets were equally good, Yon-Rogg quickly explicated: “We’ll have to choose carefully as not everyone associated with N’az’s underground economy is welcome on Hala. Finding someone who _is_ will be much easier on the… white market?”

He tried to adjust to Carol’s vocabulary which made her smile.

“The chances are lower we’ll get discovered while preserving at the second option, waiting for the ideal opportunity, so having to wait a bit longer until we find the best fitting target may be worth the effort,” she mused staring at the map.

“So the illegal market it is,” Talos announced, not waiting for Yon’s approval that he knew he would get anyway. He was aware the Kree would condescend to Carol’s ideas in any case.

She, however, waited for the approving nod of her friend.

“Good. I’m glad we are all on the same page.”

Yon-Rogg didn’t know what that meant but could conclude she was talking about all of them agreeing on something – which, to be fair, didn’t happen every day. Talos took the tablet with him to explain the plan to his men and figure out the best route to get there without running into the Empire, leaving the other two behind.

“ _Dick-measuring contest_?” Yon asked amused, unable to hide his smile.

“Don’t act like it wasn’t one.”

“We didn’t- Never mind.”

Carol didn’t even bother to explain, letting him figure it out for himself. Generally she was surprised one hadn’t killed the other yet but still wished Yon-Rogg and Talos would get along better. Then again, expecting they would set aside differences – especially differences that resulted in a war that lasted for millenniums – within just one week probably was too demanding.

“What is N’az like?” she asked simply to have a more casual conversation with him.

“Pretty much like you.”

“Beautiful?” Carol smirked.

“Heated and incalculable,” Yon commented drily, his face unreadable.

“I’ll just pretend you said hot,” she shrugged. “Also I’m not incalculable.”

“Your tendency to get impulsively angry is quite reliable, that much is true.”

She grunted disapprovingly, crossing her arms on her chest.

“See, _there it is_.”

Wanting to throw something at him she realized that this was _exactly_ what he was talking about. But she really wanted to get rid of his complacent smile: “It’s not my fault you are so _insufferable_.”

His grin only grew wider.

“Oh am I?”

Carol had stood up at this point and walked over to sit down on the table right in front of him while he didn’t move at all.

“Do you want this to end in a fight?” she asked teasingly as she leaned forward, her face only a few inches away from his.

“To support your violent tendencies?”

“To shut you up.”

“Perhaps,” he suggested, holding her gaze. “You should find a different way to stop me from talking.”

“I don’t need to prove anything to you,” she reminded him but it only seemed to make him smugger.

“But can you prove it to _yourself_?”

She didn’t say anything as she leaned closer, placing her hands right next to his head. He held perfectly still, unwilling to yield despite the growing tension between them. Then, without any further warning, she forcefully pushed his chair and gave it another kick to prevent him from holding onto her as he toppled over backwards. Almost innocently she smiled down at him, watching him rub the back of his head.

“I don’t need to prove anything to myself either.”

Yon-Rogg smiled pliable yet wouldn’t pass the opportunity to tease her: “As I said: _Heated and incalculable_.”

Suddenly she jumped off the tablet to make sure to sit down on his stomach as long as he was still lying down. He looked up to her in surprise, his expression turning from contentment to puzzlement. She had already proven her point and Yon-Rogg was sure she wasn’t looking for an _actual_ fight so her behavior perplexed him. Had he unintentionally hurt her in a way?

“I’m still pretending you said hot.”

“One doesn’t exclude the other,” he was looking up, unsure if he should wait for her next move or use her distraction to throw her off him. He wasn’t her mentor anymore, he knew that, but he still felt responsible for teaching her a few lessons, especially those about never letting your guard down. But seeing as _he_ was the one lying on his back right now he probably shouldn’t talk.

Carol wasn’t sure if they meant the same kind of hot.

“So you are more into the violent type,” she concluded jokingly, trying to lift the mood but his face was still earnest.

“I chose you, didn’t I?”

She knew he was her friend, that he was on her side, that they were supporting the same cause. And that she was stronger than him, much stronger, that he wasn’t dangerous to her even if he _wanted_ to be. So why did she suddenly feel like she was going into dangerous territory she should enter?

“ _Carol_ ,” his voice was soft now but that only alarmed her even more.

Whatever he wanted to say to her, whatever she wanted to reply, it had to wait as the door opened once more to let Talos into the room.

“I don’t even want to know _what_ you are doing but please don’t do it on my ship,” he said rather annoyed than surprised by the sight of her sitting on top of him. He didn’t want to mention it, mostly because it wasn’t his business, but of course he had noticed they were sharing a room even when they didn’t have to.

“We are fighting…” Carol answered, still not looking away from Yon-Rogg who was staring right back at her before she finally and slowly stood up.

“Fighting, _right_ ,” Talos repeated watching Yon get back onto his feet as well. “We found a route that doesn’t lead through Kree territory.”

He threw the tablet to Carol in a way that made it easy for her to catch it. Yon-Rogg looked over her shoulder as they both followed the simulated route through the universe on the screen.

“Two days,” she commented, reading the text the device offered. “No risks for us?”

“Only from ships outside the Empire.”

“Sound easy enough,” Carol handed the tablet back to him as she heard Yon-Rogg say _“It could be worse.”_ realizing how different their approach to things was. Of course she was aware of how disparate their personalities were - Yon-Rogg was grounded, calm and rational while she had her had her heads up in space, was restless and emotional – but it still disorientated her every time the thought became apparent. After all she felt so comfortable with him, so well-understood, and able to understand and read him as well.

“I hope you two can behave that long.”

“I’ll babysit our Kree to make sure he doesn’t do something stupid,” she replied cheerfully, earning a frown from Yon.

“I don’t think _he_ is the one doing something stupid here.”

Despite her confusion of him siding with Yon-Rogg instead of her, she realized it sounded more like a warning than friendly banter.

When they all had left the room and agreed on not having to go over their plans anymore until they reached their destination, Talos headed back to the control room while Yon-Rogg and Carol decided to get something to eat. They walked in silence for a while until he started touching his head again, sounding rather theatrically.

“It’s a shame we don’t have to pay for dinner because you clearly owe me something.”

“I’m not responsible for your inability to hold your balance while sitting on a simple chair.”

She had just finished her sentence when she stumbled over something, causing her to fall over without the chance to catch herself. Carol’s body had already hit the floor with a dull noise when she realized he had placed his foot right in front of her.

“ _You_ are the one to talk about balance,” he said grinningly as he offered his hand.

Carol grinned as well, letting him help her get back up.

“ _You_ owe _me_ dinner for that.”

“I’ve paid for more than enough of your meals in my life.”

“Ah, come on. I _always_ paid you back.”

“I never saw one credit from you.”

“My presence was valuable enough.”

Even though she had delivered it with a lot of confidence, she _did_ think about actually paying him back by at least taking him out for breakfast at some point. The lie aside, Yon-Rogg never had to spent any of his salary on her, let alone buy whatever meal she wanted after every single training. Especially since she often had failed his lessons and certainly didn’t deserve a reward for that.

Yet he always had.

She had earned more than enough money to pay for it herself but she had never stopped him from doing it for her, assuming it was some kind of Kree ritual – until she had mentioned it to Att-Lass who only laughed slightly, explaining their commander had never done this for anyone before. Not even for Minn-Erva.

For quite some time she had believed it was a part of his lie, that he bought her food to manipulate her into thinking he was her friend but the more detachment she got from this feeling of betrayal and pain, the more she realized that wasn’t the case.

He never had to pretend to be interested in her to make her want to follow the Kree ideals and join the Starforce. It had always been something she wanted to do on her own.

Nothing of what Yon-Rogg had done for her was necessary for manipulation. Not paying for her meals, not opening his door whenever she needed him, not spending every waking moment outside of work with her. He had done all of that because he _wanted_ to.

Yes, she really owed him breakfast.

But would she even get the chance for that? Either they would die trying to overthrow the Supreme Intelligence or they would succeed and go different ways afterwards. His place was with the Kree, it had always been - just as her was out there in the universe. She knew that. Hoping he’d see this differently, that he would still choose to follow her after the Intelligence isn’t a threat anymore, and the Kree can live in peace, was absolutely pointless and would only result in more pain.

He had chosen to help her, perhaps he had even chosen to help her _because_ of her, but there was a huge difference between decided to spend the duration of a single scheme with someone and deciding to follow said person for a larger amount of time. The Kree would need him after the Supremor is gone, so it was even egoistically to expect him to come with her.

Yet she did.

“ _Is_.”

His voice tore her out of her thoughts. She looked at him in confusion, not understanding what he was referring to and even though he stared right ahead and couldn’t see her face he still answered her silent question.

“Your presence _is_ valuable enough.”

She held on for a moment, watching him walk ahead but as soon as he noticed she had stopped he did the same, concerned turning around to face her.

Maybe she was wrong.

Carol smiled when she caught up, hit his back and commented on how slow he was which Yon-Rogg rewarded with a short laugh.

Maybe she _would_ take him out for breakfast after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't expect to write this so fast since I wanted to finish 'I'm a failure of your Universe' first but I had a few ideas for this chapter while taking a walk with my dog and instead of simply writing them down I somehow ended up writing the entire thing in one sitting so here you go! Also thank you for over 1000 kudos!! That's so kind of you guys ♥
> 
> A few days ago I found an interview in which Brie called the relationship between Yon and Carol "loving" and I'm still shook. I mean I knew that but hearing her say it is just... she really went there huh asdfgfdhgsa (Captain Marvel interviews be like Jude: "It's a tight relationship." - Schwartz: "It's a tender relationship."- Brie, breaking through the wall: IT'S LOVE.)
> 
> And in case it matters to anyone: N'az is a made-up planet as inventing one that exactly suits my needs was easier than researching every single planet there is in the MCU and then settling for one that's at least partly what I need. Considering how little time we'll spend there it just wasn't worth the effort. (You have no idea how hard it was for me to come up with a name since everything my brain suggested were names of already existing Star Wars planets lmao In the end I somehow settled on that name after thinking of Naboo, though I imagine N'az to be more like Tatooine and Atollon or even Torfa if you want to stay in the MCU. Basically a really dry planet.)


	21. His Girlfriend

“Remember when we did this on Kashirr?” Carol looked around enthusiastically to properly take their surroundings, the foreign languages, and faces in – at least as much as the hood she had to wear allowed her to. The market was so crowded today that they could barely make one single step without passing people from all over the universe as they were busy finding the best deal and making the most profit.

Yon-Rogg sighed heavily: “Don’t remind me.”

During their time in the Starforce they had been entrusted with several undercover missions but the one on Kashirr, when they had to spy on a high Xandarian politician before the peace treaty had been signed, had always stood out due to the actual nature of the disguise they had chosen. Or rather _Carol_ had chosen. Back then she had cheerfully introduced them as a couple on what would be the Kree equivalent to a honeymoon, automatically forcing Yon-Rogg to play along in front of the receptionist of the inn they were staying at until they got to their room. Admittedly, he hadn’t briefed her on the story and its details they would be using but only because said lie had never changed since their very first mission. And of course Vers just _had_ to make him regret his trust in her prudence. Her saying he was her husband had totally thrown him off guard for a moment. It wasn’t enough to raise any suspicion as he was too professional for that but reduced him to agreeing with everything she said until they were alone. Not that he would have had a choice either way.

The entire affair seemed like a joke to her which had angered him, had made him inform her that this was a serious, important mission and not some childish game of hide and seek. However at least her reasoning, that it would be weird and even startling for business partners – which was their usual explanation – to not only stay in the same room but _also_ sleep in the same bed, made sense.

Still it had irritated him.

Vers pretending to love him, to be in a relationship with him that was by far more personal than the one they had, had incensed him – no, _hurt_ him – so much that he had nearly lost control, had nearly shown her how he truly felt about her, in her words brilliant, narrative. He had always excused these feelings by telling himself he had been hugely offended by Vers somewhat suggesting he would ever make a move on her despite him being in a position of power over her. That he had no decorum whatsoever. But now he realized he had only felt that way because her made-up story had shown him what he had wanted and could never have. Had brought him so close to it only to make him fully understand _how_ far away he really was from it. And this still hurt him to this day.

“Oh come on, it was s shitton of fun,” she smiled at the memory of how awkward he had been whenever she had linked arms with him or address him as darling. Seeing him this stiff had been so amusing to her that she had kept calling him darling whenever they were alone on Hala for a while. His reaction, how he clearly didn’t want to be _this_ personal with her, had hurt Carol at first but she had quickly found distraction in all the teasing this new brief dynamic between them allowed.

“For you perhaps.”

She gently pushed her shoulder against his arm to get a reaction out of him and despite Yon-Rogg trying his best to hide it from her by using the hood he was wearing, she still managed to see the smile she had been aiming for.

Satisfied she walked confidently ahead, reassuring herself that _this_ would finally be the day they would find the perfect Kree for their plan. The last two days had basically been a waste as they couldn’t even find one single Kree, let alone a useable one, but they surely _had_ to succeed at some point.

Yon-Rogg stayed a step or two behind, wondering if he should catch up to her or just enjoy the sight of her being this full of zest for action. The market was more crowded than it had been the previous days which was partly responsible for Carol’s enthusiasm and while Yon wouldn’t consider himself to be an optimistic person, he had to at least admit that finding Kree now was more probable and realistic than it had been before- yet it still was no guarantee.  Carol suddenly slowed down shortly forcing Yon-Rogg to automatically end up walking next to her.

“What did you see?” he asked quietly, trying to look around without raising any suspicion by pretending to be interested in the goods the traders around them had to offer. He was glad that walking around the city without anyone recognizing them had been much easier than he had expected. No one really paid attention to them unless they wanted to sell them something and people hiding their identity was fairly common given the nature of this mart.

“The ship over there,” she almost unnoticeably nodded to their right. “May be exactly what we are looking for.”

In fact it was definitely build on Hala which alone was enough to assume the owners were Kree as well since the Empire wasn’t too keen on sharing their technology with other species. Yon guided her towards the direction of their target to further inspect it, seemingly fascinated by one of the stalls close to it and just when they were about to reach their destination, two blue-skinned Kree exited the ship through its tailgate lift. Judging by the goods they were unloading they certainly weren’t poor and rather successful with their business which led them to believe they left and entered Hala on a regular basis, meaning they were the perfect target. After all, they had to be sure the Kree they would capture were in the possession of a required code that would allow them to get past the security system of Hala - something traders who weren’t about to return to the Kree home planet at some point obviously were less likely to have as they weren’t in need of it.

Neither Carol nor Yon-Rogg had to say something; one exchange of glances was enough. They both turned around to inform Talos whose people would be responsible for the next step of the plan. Carol would have loved to do capture the Kree herself, letting others do all the work just wasn’t how she usually operated, but the chances of her – and Yon-Rogg’s – identity getting uncovered in the process were just too high. Skrulls pretending to belong to a different species, however, weren’t in danger of that.

 

“We’ve got the code,” Talos smiled, having expected to find it in their memories this quickly. He had always been good at what he does so gathering the information they needed had been incredibly easy for him. “This is – how do you call it, Carol? A walk in the park?”

Yon-Rogg didn’t seem to share his enthusiasm.

“I don’t think you do.”

“Are you questioning my abilities?” Talos asked offended. He had always taken pride in his simming skills and to have a Kree, out of all races, doubt them was one of the worst insults he could possibly imagine.

Carol was about to ease the tension by quickly continuing the conversation but Yon shook his head.

“I’m not. I just _know_ it isn’t that easy.”

“It is,” Talos insisted. They had the code. Yon-Rogg just couldn’t handle the fact that Skrulls would infiltrate his precious Hala with so little effort, couldn’t admit that their system of granting and denying someone access based on a combination of letters and numbers was heavily flawed. He understood it hurt his pride, not that he cared, but to keep impeding the mission was just unacceptable.

Wanting to leave the room he was about to turn around when Carol’s voice made him stop.

“If Yon-Rogg says it isn’t that easy then it really isn’t.”

The Skrull grumbled, _of course she would take his side now_ , but held on to hear him out. For her.

“The system changed,” Yon-Rogg explained. “The code, and based on the usage of the word’s singular I assume you only found one, is too recent, it won’t work – in fact it will only alarm them and possibly even _tell_ them you are Skrulls.”

“You mean there are several codes?” Carol concluded.

“Anyone leaving and returning to Hala regularly gets a new code in a three week circle. However, only the code from seven circles ago will grant you access. Codes newer and older will lead to getting arrested and interrogated.”

She understood the concept behind that idea and it certainly wasn’t stupid but she still had to wonder: “I doubt that system never fails.”

“It’s better to arrest two innocent people than missing one Skrull,” Yon-Rogg shrugged, however seeing her expression he quickly tried to allay her. “They are not getting executed. We have enough ways to figure out if someone is a Skrull or not.”

“Do you _think_ they aren’t getting killed or do you _know_ it?” Carol asked suspicious, having learnt over the years how brutal and unforgiving the Empire was. Executing someone for forgetting or mixing up a several months old code didn’t seem _too_ far-fetched.

“… Think,” he admitted, lowering his voice. He hadn’t considered that option yet – never _had_ to consider it as he had always believed the Kree were the good ones, the heroes in this war. “It’s what I have been told.”

Seeing how uncomfortable he was – and thankful Talos didn’t further comment on it – she cursed at herself for having brought it up at all and swiftly continued, crossing her arms across her chest: “So how are we getting the correct code then?”

“We get personal,” Talos said with a grin. “We have our ways. _More_ ways than one.”

“That thing you hooked me on?”

Of course Yon-Rogg remembered Vers telling him about the existence of a machine that allowed the Skrulls to extract memories which were much older than the ones they could normally find access to with their simming - after all had this information led to the Empire changing its old system. But he had hoped they could avoid this particular solution.

“No,” he insisted. The thought of invading these innocent trader’s minds made him incredibly uncomfortable. Simming was already bad enough but to invade the memories of someone’s entire life was unacceptable to him. They didn’t deserve this.

Talos rolled his eyes: “We really don’t have time for your patriotism, Kree.”

“What else should we do?” Carol quickly asked to deescalate the situation. She understood Yon’s worries and wasn’t too comfortable with digging in other people’s privacy either – especially since she knew how that felt – but she also didn’t see a different way to get the code. And they really needed it. What was the right of privacy of two people compared to the safety of the entire universe?

“Let me talk to them,” Yon-Rogg suggested.

“Oh, how silly of me to not think of that,” Talos laughed. “Surely they’ll tell a traitor everything he wants to know. They’ll probably even join us.”

“I know how to interrogate, _Skrull_.”

“He could use the machine as a threat,” Carol proposed despite not being convinced by Yon’s plan either.

“It doesn’t hurt.”

“Yes. But _they_ don’t know that.”

Talos held her gaze for a moment before he gave in. “Fine”, he turned to Yon. “You have ten minutes.”

Without further arguing and therefore losing time Yon-Rogg went straight to the room that temporarily functioned as a prison, followed directly by Carol. He knew exactly what she was going to say and mentally prepared himself for a dispute.

“I’m coming with you.”

There it was.

“No, you _won’t_.”

“Come on, we-”

“Carol,” he held on in front the door, appealing to her reason. “As much as I don’t like to admit it but Talos is right – _I_ will already have a hard time making them talk. They surely won’t say anything when you are in the room.”

She pouted although she knew he was right: “Fine, but I’ll follow the conversation through the monitor.” She pointed at the little screen next to the door. “Just in case you are getting in trouble.”

“Thank you. I feel so much safer now knowing you will protect me, the former Kree commander, from the harmless civilians,” he teased. “Just make sure you won’t get yourself killed in this incredibly dangerous situation.”

She grinned hitting his arm: “I’m willing to take this risk for you.”

 

He sat down slowly in front of the two traders, going for a friendlier approach. Thankfully the Skrulls hadn’t tied them up so they were free to roam the room – an activity they gave up on quite early when they realized there was no escape – which hopefully would make them more willing to cooperate. He could use all the benefits one could possibly have in captivity as incentives to make them join the cause. The smugglers were sitting on the floor, waiting for something other than Yon-Rogg taking a seat as well to happen. Anyone else would have probably been scared to death but they were Kree so even though neither of them had ever been a part of the military they still refused to show any sign of fear.

At least until this moment. Now they not only had to worry about the Skrull but also about having to face Yon-Rogg himself which intimidated them despite being still determined to stand their ground.

“What do you want, traitor? Talk?” one of the prisoners spat glaring at Yon-Rogg before he managed to start the conversation himself. “We are not as weak as you.”

“I’m not looking to have a talk with you,” he said calmly, ignoring the insult. “I’m trying to help you.”

“Oh, are you?” the other one laughed sarcastically as he looked over Yon’s shoulder to the door. “Like you are helping the Skrulls?”

“I’m not-” he wanted to explain he wasn’t on the Skrulls’ side at all, that if anything he was helping _Carol_ not them. However, to the Kree that didn’t make much of a difference. Carol was a traitor as well, someone who had chosen the Skrulls over them and was accordingly hated. Technically Yon-Rogg didn’t even blame them had he thought the same thing about her – though he still would never be able to hate her – so arguing against their aversion would only prove itself to be quite quite difficult.

“You are not what?”

“Helping the Skrulls?”

“Oh, right. _The woman._ You are working for her now,” Yon-Rogg could hear the disgust in his voice. “What was her name? Vers?”

“Carol,” he quickly replied, a bit _too_ eager for them. If she’d later bother to ask he would pretend to have only replied so fast to prevent her bursting into the room but truth was it had become important to him to address her, and to have others address her, with the right name because it was important to her.

“I don’t know what’s worse, choosing the Skrulls over the Kree,” now they didn’t even look at him anymore but at each other. “Or choosing _love_ over your entire nation.”

Yon-Rogg frowned.

“This is not what this is about-”

“Tsk, sure,” the trader replied annoyed. “We know what happened, Yon-Rogg. _Everyone_ does.”

Carol, carefully following everything over the surveillance camera, wasn’t sure what they were referring to exactly so despite wanting Yon to be done with this conversation as quick as possible to get the code so they would finally be on their way to Hala, she still hoped they would continue. She was curious to know what the Supreme Intelligence had told the Kree about him - even if she felt like it would only make it more difficult for her to resisting the temptation of flying directly to Hala to kick their artificial ass.

The traders hadn’t been surprised by Yon-Rogg being alive so the Intelligence hadn’t given him an easy way out by pretending he was dead, instead they must have spread some kind of story about him, whether it was true or not. Surely they hadn’t admitted that Yon had tricked them or that Carol once again managed to scare Ronan away. So despite knowing it wouldn’t change anything but she was still dying to hear what the official Supremor approved narrative was.

“The code,” Yon insisted, trying to change the topic to focus on what they were here for – and for them to stop talking about _that_. “I will protect you from the Skrulls if you cooperate.”

“Could you protect us from the Supreme Intelligence as well?” the Kree asked hypocritically. “ _You_ know what happens to traitors.”

They were right. He couldn’t. And perhaps it really was too much to demand. Giving them the needed information voluntarily would ruin their lives forever so expecting the Kree to leave everything behind, everything they ever believed in, to live in exile to escape the wrath of the Intelligence. It really wasn’t a more attractive alternative to dying by the hands of the Skrulls.

“Kill us if you must. We won’t help you, the Skrulls or your girlfriend.”

He didn’t bother to correct them and rather thought about an argument that could change their mind but they didn’t wait for that.

“I hope it was at least worth it for you,” one of them snarled. “Betraying your entire race for one _Terran_ woman.”

He hated to recognize himself in their words, in their arrogance towards other species, however he couldn’t quite tell if the entire concept was insulting to him now or if he was only bothered because they were talking Carol.

“I did not betray _you_ ,” he defended himself. _The Supreme Intelligence betrayed us,_ he didn’t voice his thoughts as he knew they wouldn’t believe him – just like hadn’t believed Carol.

“If you betray one, you betray the collective.”

Yon-Rogg held their gaze, eager to prove himself, to prove he was on the _right_ side this time, that _they_ could be too. But he knew they would never trust a traitor, someone who actively chose to not only ignore the Supreme Intelligence’s orders but to act directly against them.

“Cooperate,” he began again, unsure if he was ordering or pleading at this point. “Trust me.”

“Fuck you,” the other one spat. “Both of you traitors.”

The desire to argue that Carol wasn’t a traitor, that if anything _he_ had betrayed _her_ , rose up in him, however he ignored it in favor of one last attempt.

“The Skrulls,” he said it in a way that suggested he didn’t include himself in this aggregation. “Are going to get the code anyway but the procedure is incredibly painful.” The Kree exchanged glances.

“Not deadly,” Yon-Rogg added, knowing death was considered as an honor. “But _agonizing._ ”

It looked like one of them was actually pondering his options but the other one immediately stopped him.

“No.”

Yon-Rogg realized that was final, that he had run out of everything he could say to get them to talk and even though he hated admitting his defeat to Talos, he left the room, knowing he didn’t have any other choice. He felt miserable about having failed his mission and was ready to endure Carol’s comments and teasing about it – but instead, to his surprise, she briefly rested her hand on his shoulder, squeezing it  lovingly before making her way to Talos to tell him he could start extracting the code.

 

Yon-Rogg had no desire to watch, although the procedure itself sure sounded interesting, and much to his relief Carol wasn’t interested in staying either. They took a walk through the nearby fields by strolling away from the city for no particular reason other than to do _something_ as they silently enjoyed each other’s company. They could barely see their ship anymore when Carol finally decided to voice the thoughts she had been lost in for quite some time at this point.

“It doesn’t look like it now but I’m sure once everything is set into motion we’ll convince more and more Kree to join us, to see what’s really happening.”

“Absolutely,” Yon replied sarcastically and harsher than he had intended. He wasn’t even sure if she was trying to convince him or herself. “They’ll immediately follow our lead.”

“I didn’t say it would be easy,” she crossed her arms sulkily. “Just that it is possible.”

“What are we doing if it isn’t?” he asked, his eyes focused on the horizon in front of them.

Carol stopped in her track, thoughtfully considering her answer. She had been wondering that herself. She wanted to end the war – not fight in it – so convincing the brainwashed Kree had always been of a higher priority than fighting them. But now she began to truly realize that maybe she won’t have a choice in the end.

“Try something else.”

Yon-Rogg turned his head to face her, having stopped as well. He smiled gently.

“And if that doesn’t work either?”

“Well, how long do you plan to stick around -” she did her best to sound as casual as possible, not like she had been wondering nonstop about this for the past weeks. “- your _girlfriend_?” she added to lift the mood a bit.

“As long as my _girlfriend_ is willing to endure me,” he kept her teasing tone yet sounded earnest.

She wanted to reply something along the lines of how they had surpassed that point a week ago but was too taken aback by his reply. If anything she had expected him to stay until they finally succeeded one day – not as long as she _wanted_ him to.

“What if there is no time limit to that?” she asked carefully, suddenly worrying he only expected her tolerance, which at this point was much more than that, to last for another couple of weeks or months at most.

Yon-Rogg seemed surprised at that.

“I stand behind my words regardless.”

Carol wanted to say something.

To _do_ something.

But she hesitated.

And turned around instead, leaving him confused by her reaction.

“Talos should be finished by now,” she started walking back to the ship. “After all their memory shouldn’t be as messy as mine was.”

He followed her; uncomfortable at the thought of the Skrulls invading her memories like that yet also realizing it was hypocritical of him to be so disapproving of it when the Supreme Intelligence had done the same to her. Something they were only able to do because of him. Interacting with the Supremor in such a way had always been normal for him, never had he been bothered by them entering his thoughts - after all he believed they had only the good of all Kree in mind. But now he was disgusted with himself and the fact that he had forced her into this life.

“I’m sorry-”

“I don’t know what you are sorry for now but shut up.”

“Just because you won’t hear it, doesn’t mean I don’t mean it.”

“Exactly. Which is why you can and should stop saying it,” she kept walking, returning to her casual tone. “But I know you won’t listen to me.”

He had caught up to her, using a tone she couldn’t quite identify.

“Why wouldn’t I listen to my girlfriend?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took forever but I'm finally on a break from uni now and won't have to go back until October so I should be able to upload the next chapters much faster! I also have a few Yonvers one shots in mind so I hope I'll find the motivation to write those down as well. (And I made another Yonvers video in case anyone cares https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4vWArPjM0P8).  
> -  
> Also(!) not that anyone asked but I'll be seeing Jude again next month which makes me so happy 🤧❤️


	22. Welcome Home

She _knew_ she’d find him here. Not that there were many places for him to hide on the new ship to begin with, of course, but she had a feeling he’d be here in the stockroom. It was quiet and lonely. And probably exactly what he needed. He was sitting on the floor, his eyes closed as he leaned the back of his head against the wall. She didn’t need to say anything; he knew it was her once she opened the door. It happened so quickly that the motion was almost lost on her; however, she still noticed how he pushed something small into the empty spot between the wall and his lower back – the communicator of the suit she had built for him.

“You really need to step your hide and seek game up,” Carol said to lighten the mood as she sat down next to him, earning a soft but sad smile from her friend.

“I would never want to hide from you,” he didn’t bother to open his eyes, his voice quiet and hoarse.

“That’s _exactly_ what someone who’s bad at hide and seek would say.”

“I suppose _you_ are a seasoned player,” she liked the humor in his voice – so much more than the sadness. And she’d try her best to keep his tone that way.

Carol shrugged even though he couldn’t see it: “I think I’m more experienced in running away.”

Skeptically he opened one eye and slightly turned his head towards her, disbelief clearly showing on his face.

“I can’t picture you running away from anything. You rather constantly run straight _into_ something.”

She grinned: “As a child I always had to run away from my dad. When I stole my brothers bike, when I participated in the go-cart race even though he told me not to - he tried to make me do ballet once and as soon as he dropped me off at the place, I went to the next playground and played basketball with a few boys.”

“I didn’t understand half of what you said but it still sounds a lot like you,” he smiled again though the grave expression never left his face.

“I’m familiar with running away from things even when you _know_ you cannot avoid them,” her tone was more serious now and Yon-Rogg turned away again, closing his eyes. “And I would give you the entire _‘you are not alone’_ speech but I know that won’t help you.”

He couldn’t suppress a small grin: “It might a bit.”

Pulling her knees to her chest to rest her arms on them she grinned as well, gently nudging her shoulder against his.

“Do you want a hug as well?”

“Isn’t that the grand conclusion of every great encouraging oration?”

“Considering I never got a hug from you whenever you tried to motivate me, I suppose yours weren’t any good then,” she looked at him with a challenging expression in her eyes that he could only hear.

“I _did_ give you hugs,” Yon-Rogg protested, sounding almost insulted by the implication he didn’t give her any physical affection. “Quite a lot for a Kree commander, I may add.”

“Whenever I was sad, yes, but not when you tried to lift me up.”

“ _Perhaps_ your constant laughing about my lectures never gave me the impression that you were in desperate need of an embrace.”

Carol chuckled: “C’mon, you would have never hugged me in public anyway.”

 _I wanted to_ , he nearly turned his entire body away from her despite still having his eyes closed. “Probably because whenever I _did_ hug you, you clung to me for about half an hour - which is quite hindering when you are out on the streets and trying to get somewhere.”

“It wasn’t half an hour,” she said defensively, though she had to admit to herself they definitely lasted longer than Yon-Rogg had intended them to. But he had never pushed her away or let go first so she had never seen a reason to change her behavior – especially because she could do it again and against for years without him ever complaining. “Anyway, back to your hiding-”

“You mean my _cowardice._ ”

She frowned: “You are anything _but_ a coward, Yon.”

He didn’t reply, partly because he didn’t want to argue and partly because he didn’t even know _how_ to argue with her about this. Soon they would reach Hala, his home - and he would return as a traitor instead of the hero he used to be. Yon-Rogg knew that hiding in the stockroom to pretend they were still far away from the Kree home world was not only futile but also ridiculous – yet he was still sitting here, not even opening his eyes as if that would change anything. As if all the pain would go away somehow. He had clung to the thought of everything turning out in their favor for the longest time but the encounter with the two traders had brought him back to reality.

Maybe Carol really was able to defeat the Supreme Intelligence – _he_ certainly wasn’t – but would the Kree really follow their lead? Or even consider finally living in peace with the Skrulls no matter how hard that would be? Would they even be able to change their perspective? To unlearn all the years of manipulation and propaganda? The peace treaty with Xandar had already caused a slight commotion even though it was the Supreme Intelligence themselves that had initiated it. Perhaps some of them would be willing to follow if they still saw him as the hero he once was but he knew those times were over.

Yon-Rogg feared having to face the Intelligence again, feared failing Carol with his incapability to overcome them. But mostly he feared having to fight against his own race. He couldn’t stop being loyal to the Kree, being loyal to Carol wouldn’t change that.

He just couldn’t fight them.

And he didn’t want to anyway.

“I always thought you were fearless,” Carol began after realizing he wouldn’t say anything and for a moment he interpreted it as a reproach but her voice was too soft, too kind for that. He would have been shocked by how she was almost replying directly to his thoughts had she not always known him so well. “Our fearless leader, constantly at the front line, leading by example. You’ve taken so many hits for the team yet you were never afraid of facing the enemy over and over again. But of course you aren’t _actually_ fearless – you are far too clever for that.”

“I don’t have money if that’s what you want,” he raised his brows in surprise, eyes still shut, and smiled slightly when she hit him in response.

“You should enjoy my _benevolent_ mood as long as it lasts.”

He could hear her moving and figured she was about to leave again but instead he felt her sitting down in front of him and pictured the Carol-typical challenging look she must have on her face.

“You are courageous - _incredibly_ courageous. Probably the bravest person I know.”

Yon-Rogg sighed slightly: “You know yourself, Carol.”

“You are so hard to compliment, just shut up,” she rolled her eyes and expected him to respond with something witty but he stayed completely silent. “You are trying to make up for the mistakes you made, for the harm you caused even if you weren’t aware of what was actually going on. You are turning on the leader you have been following your entire life. I know how hard this is for you; I really wouldn’t want to be in your shoes right now.”

Confused he opened his eyes to look at his feet: “What’s wrong with my shoes?”

“It means I wouldn’t want to be in your situation,” she grinned. It hadn’t been on purpose but she was glad she somehow got him to look at her.

“You Terrans really should learn to just say what you mean,” he shook his head.

“Sorry that our languages aren’t as boring as yours.”

“Maybe your species should focus less on blemishing your language and more on improving your technologies and sciences,” Carol once had told about how excited and proud Terrans were that they managed to fly to C-53’s moon – which seemed like the most trivial accomplishment to him.

“You are just bitter you couldn’t open a simple door.”

He tried to look like he was angry with her yet he couldn’t help but to smile: “So I’m too clever to be fearless but too stupid to open a door.”

“You are quite something, yes.”

“I hope that’s a compliment.”

“Oh, _now_ you want to hear them,” they smiled at each other before Carol finally stood up, offering her hand. He didn’t want to follow her but he knew he had to face Hala sooner or later and he’d rather do it with her than with anyone else.

 

Yon-Rogg had had lost count about how many times he had seen his home planet, how many times he had returned to Hala. It was still a beautiful sight to him and a certain kind of warmth filled him seeing it after such a long time – until the cold realization hit him _how_ he was coming back.

The sight had made him anxious only once before – when he got sent back by Carol. Back then he had wanted to die, had given up, hoped for her to kill him. He couldn’t follow his orders by the Supreme Intelligence, he just couldn’t even _attempt_ to harm her but he also couldn’t face the Supremor after refusing to do what they wanted him to. He had counted on Carol’s anger, that she’d lose control like always, that she hated him enough for what he had done and would end his life.

But she hadn’t.

The one time he hadn’t wanted her to control herself she had and if it hadn’t been so tragic he would have laughed about it. Now, he was returning a second time after having betrayed the Supreme Intelligence – but with Carol by his side. A twist of events he surely hadn’t expected two months ago yet here he was.

And he wouldn’t want to be with anyone else.

“Identify yourself,” a stern Kree voice echoed through the control room.

“CS-573 XF-11 Z,” a Skrull, who looked like one of the traders, answered confidently while everyone else was perfectly still. Of course, voice recognition was a part of the security measures as well. As the guard granted them access and allowed them to land, Carol took Yon-Rogg’s hand and ran her thumb over the back of his gently it gently. As quick as she had taken it she let go again but he still appreciated it. And it _did_ make him feel slightly better.

“Can I talk to you for a moment?” Talos asked once they had entered the planet’s atmosphere and Carol wordlessly followed, leaving Yon-Rogg behind in his thoughts.

“Keep an eye on your Kree,” he immediately began once the door closed behind them, shutting them off from everyone else. “I don’t want him to do something stupid.”

“He won’t do something stupid,” Carol insisted. She trusted Yon-Rogg, knew he truly was on their side – but Talos’ comment brought the image of the communicator back into her mind. She had trusted him twice before and both times he had betrayed her – she knew that, and sadly Talos knew it as well.

“I know what you are feeling for him but be careful. Not only for _your_ good.”

 She looked at the closed door.

“If he wanted to betray us he could have just told the Empire the location of your home – which he obviously didn’t considering they still haven’t turned up to destroy the entire planet.”

“We had made sure he would never be alone and therefore won’t get the chance to. Also he isn’t in the possession of a communication device. But on Hala he’ll get the chance to talk to other Kree, the military even.”

Carol decided this _certainly_ wasn’t the moment to bring up the fact that she had left him alone for a few minutes from time to time or that she had basically given him a communicator over a week ago. And she _surely_ shouldn’t tell him she had seen him with it mere minutes ago – alone.

“You don’t _want_ to leave his side anyway,” Talos commented when she was still looking at the door without answering him. “So just keep an eye on him as well.”

“Fine, I will,” she sighed. “But it won’t be necessary.”

She was about to go back into the control room before she heard him say “I don’t like that.”

Confused she turned around, trying to find balance again after the ship had made its final bumpy movement before it entered the sky above Hala.

“What?”

“That you aren’t even trying to deny you have feelings for him.”

 

Yon-Rogg was looking out of a window longingly at the city. He had missed his home, had missed she sharp structure, the bright lights, it was so different from the architecture he had seen on C-53 and the Skrull’s planet. Yet he felt almost guilty at the sight, like it wasn’t his to admire anymore. It was an unusual experience to not land in the Starforce tower but he didn’t particularly mind it. This way he was closer to the actual city, the heart of Hala - and despite his initial thoughts he was still looking forward to experience it again.  
It would take a few more hours until he was allowed to leave the ship, however. Talos made a comment or two about how exhausting it was to have two people on board who couldn’t shapeshift, who had to be equipped with proper Kree clothing as a disguise, but Yon-Rogg ignored him.

He just finally wanted to be home.

They stepped outside in their newly brought clothes, the hood pulled deep enough into their face that it would be hard for someone to recognize them but not deep enough to look suspicious. If anything it simply looked a bit oversized – which it was. Naturally the two Skrulls who were in charge of buying the clothes had no understanding of Kree sizes. To maximize the effect of their disguise they would only take the darkest alleys of lower Hala (the constant absence of sunlight made waiting for the night unnecessary) and not wander into any territory were the chances of running into someone they knew were too high.

Taking a deep breath he almost forgot his worries for a moment and despite knowing it wouldn’t last for long Carol was still happy to see him a bit more comfortable. They started down the street, following one of the routes they considered to include in the final execution of their plan, keeping conversation to a minimum.

While they were walking she tried really hard to think about anything else but Talos words as well as the mental image of the communicator kept haunting her. She was desperately searching for the logical explanation that she knew existed. It had to. But she just couldn’t find it.

“Are you looking for someone?” she asked seemingly to only make some casual small talk.

“What makes you think so?” he was surprised by her question had he only looked around to take more of their surroundings in – not to see someone specific.

“Because you at least _tried_ to contact someone,” Carol could clearly see his reluctance to reply and in fact he didn’t for a while, simply walked straight ahead, until she brought it up again. “So?”

“It’s,” Yon-Rogg hurried to find the right words. “Some kind of second plan.”

“You mean a Plan B?”

“I don’t know what a B is,” he replied honestly, trying to copy the pronunciation as faithful as possible.

“It’s a letter – the second letter of our alphabet. It means the plan you use when the first one fails.”

“Then no,” he shook his head. “The first one doesn’t have to fail for this one.”

“So you are gonna use it anyway?”

“If I have to, yes.”

Carol stopped walking, prompting him to do the same. “Will you stop being so cryptic?” she didn’t like his bland refusal to just tell her what he had used the communicator for. Especially not after she had so confidently defended him in front of Talos. He looked at her like she had caught him doing something wrong.

“I will if you insist.”

He seemed so sincere, like he was willing to act against his own will if she wanted him to. Just like he had done it for the Supreme Intelligence – only that _they_ didn’t have to ask to hear his thoughts. And Carol didn’t want that at all. She didn’t want to be a dictator, especially not to him.

So perhaps it was stupid of her, perhaps she should have just insisted anyway. But she just looked away. “No, it’s fine.” She wanted to trust him, she really did. And she would. He deserved it. Just as he deserved his privacy and secrets.

She was about to continue walking when something caught her eye. Quickly she turned around, pulling on Yon-Rogg’s arm to drag him with her. Naturally he couldn’t resist the urge to turn his head around and see what possible hazard had made Carol flee so quickly, expecting to see someone they personally knew and who therefore would be more likely to instantly recognize them. But instead he saw himself.

The Starforce posters which were used as propaganda for the military were still up and almost unaltered. He had become used to seeing his face plastered around Hala even if he could have lived without constantly encountering it (though he had enjoyed Vers teasing whenever she discovered one – not that he would have ever admit to that) but now, more than ever, he wished they didn’t exist. Instead of announcing him as a hero like they had for the entirety of their existence, they now branded him as a traitor. A reminder of what would happen to those who would turn against the Intelligence – and perhaps also a personal vendetta. The Supremor didn’t like losing and even though Yon-Rogg could barely believe it himself, they had done just that when he turned against them and freed Carol.

He knew he was a traitor and he had known everyone else on Hala was aware of that as well, but to see it like this, to be _forced_ to see it like this, still impaled him with a numbing pain. Maybe the city really wasn’t his to enjoy anymore.

“ _Look at me_.”

He needed a moment before he was able to turn his eyes away from the poster but he followed her instructions.

“You’re not alone, okay?” without saying anything else she pulled her arms around him, hugging him like he had done it during all those nights in which she had come to him after a nightmare. After all this _was_ like a nightmare to him - and just like hers, his turned out to be real as well. He didn’t even attempt to fight his own desire, his own wish, was too _tired_ of fighting it, so he just embraced her as well – exactly like he had always wanted to.

 

They were going over some plans of the city to study each route carefully, figuring out the pros and contras of every single one of them. Yon-Rogg, who by far knew Hala the best, pointed out several streets in the hologram until his finger finally came to a rest right over the biggest building.

“There’s the Supreme Intelligence.”

“How many guards?” Talos asked, eyeing the building skeptically. He didn’t know a lot about Kree technology so he wondered if all that space was necessary to keep the artificial intelligence going or if it only was this huge due to their ego – knowing the Kree it was most likely the later.

“None.”

“What do you mean none?”

“They aren’t needed. Kree don’t turn on the Intelligence, and even if they do they simply leave – no one would dare to attack them. And intruders,” he added sarcastically. “Are nonexistent.”

“So we can all just walk straight into it.”

“We shouldn’t go as a group,” Carol interrupted, looking at Yon-Rogg to see if he had the same thought. “One person at a time, like we were normally consulting the Intelligence.” He nodded.

“Who’s the lucky person to go first?”

“We know how to behave and what to do,” Yon-Rogg explained, pointing with his head over to Carol. “So it’s a Kree first, then the Skrulls and then the other Kree.”

“I only see _one_ Kree here,” Carol smirked.

“You are a hybrid, Carol, so I count you as a Kree,” he lectured as if she didn’t know that already.

“Earlier today I was a Terran to you,” she recalled teasingly.

“If you can call me both stupid _and_ intelligent, I can call you a Kree _and_ a Terran. At least _I_ am factually right.”

“If the truth is so important to you I’ll refrain from calling you intelligent from now on.”

Grinning he was about to reply when Talos, obviously annoyed, raised his voice.

“Can you two focus for a second?”

“Alright, Captain Killjoy,” she saluted ironically which nearly made Yon-Rogg laugh. “I’ll go first and Yon-Rogg will be the last.”

“How long is the interval between each person?” Talos wondered, looking at the way up to the entrance.

“Several minutes,” Yon-Rogg replied. “You’ll need some time to climb up those stai-”

A knock on the door interrupted their briefing, causing Carol to quickly turn off the hologram and the Skrulls turn into Kree. The voice outside announced a casual inspection of their stockroom to potentially find illegal goods, which naturally prompted one of the Skrulls to open the door. Then everything happened at once, several Kree warriors stormed on board, immediately capturing most of the Skrulls. Carol, who was standing further back with Talos and Yon-Rogg, raised her fist and was ready to shoot, but the Kree commander shook his head rebukingly.

“I’ll kill him before you manage to even hurt me,” he held his pistol against the head of the Skrull who opened the door. “And I’m sure you don’t want that.” His tone was diminishing which only further angered.

Yon-Rogg frowned. Such threats never had an impact on Kree as they were always acting for the collective and in this case killing the enemies’ commander would have a higher priority than saving the life of a lower rank soldier, but he – and sadly the Empire as well – knew Carol wasn’t like that. She lowered her hands which slowly stopped glowing as she glared at the commander, who, now that several other Kree warriors had captured her as well as the others, decided to completely ignore her.

 “Yon-Rogg!” he exclaimed cheerfully. “Welcome home! I haven’t seen you for quite some time. How was your vacation?”

Yon-Rogg didn’t even bother to reply.

“Ah, as talkative as always. Anyway, I see you brought some souvenirs with you,” the commander slowly came closer as Carol and Talos were forced onto their knees. “The Intelligence will appreciate all the gifts you brought them.”

“I didn’t bring them anything.”

The Kree shook his head as he contemptuously looked at Talos before turning to Yon-Rogg again.

“No need to be so modest. You can be proud of your deeds for the Empire. After all, wasn’t it _you_ who announced your arrival?”

Carol waited for Yon-Rogg’s reply, for him to say that wasn’t true. She wanted him to defend himself from this obvious nonsense.

But he didn’t reply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took a bit longer than I intended it to /because/ I kept having ideas for the next two chapters - which was obviously bad for this chapter but is good news for the next two. They should get uploaded much faster since I've already written most of them C:
> 
> I hope you'll guys have a great September! (And if you are starting a new school year/semester good luck for that as well!)


	23. To Live And Die Alone

If this was a movie she’d find herself in a dark, cold cellar with water dropping down from the ceiling, perhaps even a classic skeleton chained to the wall and a few rats running around - but this wasn’t a movie and she got captured by Kree so even her cell looked awfully clean and, how people on Earth would probably call it, futuristic. And rats didn’t live on Hala anyway.

She had tried everything imaginable to get out, inspected every inch of the floor, door and walls despite knowing her former home wouldn’t make it _this_ easy for her.  In fact, the task was not only made basically impossible by the high security standards of her room, but also by the box-like construction her hands were trapped in. Not that it actually mattered as they had once again attached an inhibitor to her neck and this time, judging by the pain she felt whenever she tried to use her powers, it seemed to have been further developed than any of the ones she had before – even the one Yon-Rogg had freed her from.

_Yon-Rogg._

She had run out of ideas, out of plans that could possibly lead to her escape – out of distractions. She couldn’t run away from her own thoughts anymore, _her fears_.

Yon-Rogg hadn’t betrayed them, she was sure of that, _wanted_ to be sure of that. He was her friend, she _knew_ him, had gotten to _truly_ know him over the past weeks. He always wanted to protect people, _innocent_ people, no matter where they came from and had seen the destruction, the death of harmless civilians caused by the Kree. Yon-Rogg knew what the Supreme Intelligence was doing and he wanted to stop them as much as she did - didn’t he?

_“Your life is more important to him than his own, I know that. He would die to protect you – but would he die to stop the Kree?”_

_"If he finds himself in a situation where you aren’t in danger and yet he still has to work against the Kree – will he do it?”_

She _was_ in danger, wasn’t she? He could not possibly have worked out a plan that ensured her safety yet let him help the Kree, could he? The Intelligence would never agree to such a deal. But what actually was danger to him? Perhaps he was perfectly fine with the thought of the Supreme Intelligence brainwashing her to make her work for them again. After all, safety doesn’t equal free will, does it?

No, he had chosen her of the Kree before. He hadn’t betrayed them – hadn’t betrayed _her_.

Yet things had changed. When he had turned his back on the Empire and saved her only _their_ lives were at stake – now he had to entrust her and a couple of Skrulls, out of all species, with the safety of the entire population of Hala. Perhaps the pressure had been too much; perhaps she shouldn’t have asked that of him.

But he had understood he had been on the wrong side the entire time, hadn’t he? She had _seen_ how he had suffered from the realization, how his nights had turned into an endless concatenation of nightmares, how much it had hurt him that children saw him a monster. There was _no way_ he had returned to the Intelligence.

_She knew him_.

She _had_ to trust him.

Even if everything, everyone told her she shouldn’t. Even if this damn imagine of him hiding his communicator wouldn't leave her alone.

Yon-Rogg had never been evil, never had he found joy murdering people, instead had always tried to save the innocent – even at the risk of his own life. She had seen him remind the Starforce and every soldier beneath him over and over again to avoid casualties at all costs. He had _immediately_ lowered his gun when she had told him to wait at the lake, even though she had been – unknowingly – working for his enemies and someone he considered a traitor.

They hadn’t known each other and yet he didn’t want her to die.

Now they were a team, _friends,_ maybe even more than that.

All his life he had been on the wrong side but not because he had actively chosen it. He had been manipulated, was a victim of propaganda just like every other civilian on Hala – and just like the Skrulls.

He was on her side and finally wanted to be the hero he always thought he was.

_She knew that._

But maybe she had underestimated the impact the decades of manipulation had on him; perhaps he hadn’t been able to free himself like she had.

Maybe he hadn’t been strong enough.

_“Yon-Rogg.”_

He didn’t reply.

“You are finally _home_ ,” the Intelligence answered, uncharacteristically cheerfully and seemingly unbothered by his apathy. “We’ve been waiting for you.”

He still refused to reply yet didn’t avoid looking into their eyes. He wasn’t afraid of what he saw anymore – refused to let it scare or hurt him.

“We knew you’d come back,” they tried again. “And just like so many years ago you’ve brought _the weapon_ with you.”

“Her name is Carol.”

Their face went from happiness to disappointment as they sighed, displeased with his behavior. They shook their head, acting like they had to teach him the same lesson over and over again. “Your love for her has always bothered us. Ruined a perfect soldier.”

_A mindless weapon_ , he corrected in his head – not that saying it out loud would have made a difference to the Supreme Intelligence.

“But _thankfully_ you redeemed yourself by bringing her back to us,” they continued, ignoring his unspoken statement.

“I didn’t do that.”

“Yet you are here, aren’t you? Yet _she_ is here.”

He had thought about the commander’s words, tried to figure out if there was any truth in them. If so there only was possible answer.  

“I didn’t know it was the wrong code.”

They looked at him reprehensively – an expression he had never seen on his mother. “Are you trying to say we changed the system after you betrayed us?” their tone suggested it was an outrageous idea even though Yon-Rogg knew it was exactly what had happened. “That we _willingly_ let you enter Hala to get to both you _and Vers_?”

The Intelligence refused to use her actual name to get a reaction out of him, he was aware of that that and he wouldn’t let them have that victory – no matter how much he wanted to hit them, despite knowing it would have no effect, no matter how much he wanted to demand, _beg_ that would let Carol go, _live._

He stayed calm instead, silently looking at counterfeit of his mother’s face.

“She had _always_ been such a hassle.”

Their surroundings changed, forming the gym he had been going to since he was a child. The gym he had shared with Carol and no one else. He saw himself lecturing her about controlling one’s emotions only for her to immediately lose her temper and shoot him across the room. He couldn’t suppress a smile.

“She has been, yes. To _you_.”

They smiled at him again, this time dangerously. “She has never been worth the trouble – but _now_ she will finally become useful to us – or rather the core’s energy. _She_ is worthless.”

Yon-Rogg tried to not fall for the provocation, tried to remember all his training, but failed miserably. “She _isn’t_ worthless,” he spat. Then he slowly breathed in and out, avoiding a panic he knew wouldn’t help either of them. Of course, he wanted to get to her, to save her in time – but he wasn’t Carol. He couldn’t break out of the Intelligence’s simulation – and never would be strong enough to do so. Yet - there had to be a different way. There just _had_ to.

“Without the core she’s just a weak Terran,” the Intelligence replied. “You cannot possibly be interested in that.”

“She was strong and brave even before she shot the drive.”

Yon-Rogg had never cared about her powers, if anything was only interested in teaching her how to control them so she wouldn’t end up hurting herself and others. They weren’t Carol to him, just a small almost insignificant part of her. He had fallen in love with the woman whose humor was a bit odd at times - at least by Kree standards - but always charming, the woman who wasn’t afraid to make fun of him, who treated him like her friend instead of a hero or commander. He had fallen in love with her stubbornness, the blatant refusal to listen to him. _Her smile_. Carol was exactly what he had been taught to despise all his life yet it was her humanity, her emotional side, that made her so attractive to him.

She was everything he never knew he needed.

And he couldn’t lose her again.

“Even without her powers she’d still be stronger than you,” he added weakly, giving in to the anger he felt before he regained his composure.

“ _Adorable_ ,” they commented. “How you chose her love of the admiration of millions.”

The room changed again, this time displaying a scene in which he got approached by Kree on the streets who expressed their gratitude for everything he had done, and still was doing, for them. He saw people more and more celebrating him as their hero.

“How you chose the Skrull over the Kree just for her.”

Their surroundings once more - a battlefield, Kree, even innocent civilians, children, who died by the hands of the Skrulls. He found himself in one of the countless cities that had been infiltrated by the Skrulls – Skrulls who not only illegally landed on planets but also stole the inhabitants’ looks, memories even, giving the Kree no other choice than to be wary of everyone they encountered.

“How you are willing to die for a woman who doesn’t believe in you.”

Seeing Carol like this, trapped in a cell when she should be free, _deserved_ to be free, broke his heart. He had brought her back to Hala, was responsible for everything that happened – just as he had been responsible for the six years she had spent on Hala. He should have realized they changed the system again, should have at least considered it.

“And yet here I am, willing to forgive you and once again provide you with the life you so desperately want.”

She should have never trusted him.

 

 

Carol looked up when the door opened to let several people walk in. She recognized one of them, the doctor, from her several stays at the med-bay. She stood up, ready to fight them as good as she could in her current state when a stabbing pain in her neck made her fall back to her knees again.

“Just kill me, coward,” she pressed through her teeth, raising her shoulder to her neck to provide some kind of support as her hands were still confined in the box.

“We don’t want to kill you,” the doctor’s face portrayed an emotion she immediately recognized as fake concern. “Not with these inside of you.” He pressed his index finger on the inhibitor, painfully. “You have to be alive for us to get them out of you.”

Her eyes wandered to the soldiers behind him, to the closed door behind them. There had to be a way out.

He suddenly sighed in an overly dramatic manner.

“You know, I was there when Yon-Rogg brought you to Hala, when your weak Terran body was about to die,” this caught her attention. “We should have extracted the energy right then and there. It would have been so much easier without a healthy body and immune system to fight.”

“Then why didn’t you do it?”

“Yon-Rogg insisted on saving your life, he was even willing to weaken his own body temporarily just to save you, gave you his blood. I thought it was an order by the Intelligence and followed his instructions but it was his own decision,” he quickly added to defend himself while the soldiers were still present. “We should have realized back then he wasn’t the hero we thought he was.”

“He _is_ a hero,” Carol insisted.

“You are _still_ defending him? After he betrayed you yet again? After he lied to you so many times?” the doctor shook his head in disbelief. “You truly are naïve.”

“Must be the Kree blood in me.”

Ignoring her statement he pressed a button on the inhibitor, causing another wave of agony.

“Where is he?” she didn’t expect a reply but figured it was at least worth a shot – and talking distracted her from the pain.

“Consulting the Supreme Intelligence,” one of the warriors answered. “Receiving his reward for capturing you.”

She wanted to say something, wanted to repeat that she trusted him if only to remind herself of his innocence but she felt so weak, so exhausted. It suddenly became impossible to stay awake, let alone to form a coherent thought.

_Yon._

 

 

“You are weak. And just as, if not more, worthless than her,” Yon-Rogg found himself back in the endless, bright room he usually consulted the Intelligence in. “But with us you can be so much more than that. We made you live to your full potential.”

They were right, receiving their praise and affection had always been something that made him work harder and learn more than anyone else. He had desperately looking for this attention, _affection,_ after his mother had died and they were willing to provide him with it when no one else did.

“She doesn’t need you anymore,” they continued. “But Hala does. The Kree do.”

“She had never needed me,” Yon-Rogg corrected quietly, lowering his head.

“Imagine all the possibilities, the advantages the Skrulls have now that they have found a new home – how easily they can plan an attack on Hala now. Thanks to _her_.”

_No_ , he raised his head in terror. _Please don’t._

The Intelligence frowned before they looked at him in disgust.

“You think we’ll destroy their planet.”

He _knew_ they would. They wouldn’t find the exact location in his memories, Talos had made sure of that, but they certainly would find it in his.

“You are worried for the lives of the children. I suppose the lives of Kree children don’t mean anything to you anymore.”

Yon-Rogg wanted to argue that they didn’t have to fight anymore, that they could find a solution to co-exist in peace, that _no one_ had to die anymore - but he knew the Intelligence wouldn’t rest until every single Skrull was dead. _This_ had been their priority all along – not the safety of the Empire.  
  
“You know we are going to win the war. You’ve always known. Now is your chance to get back to the winning side.”

“I’d rather be on the right side.”

They shook their head as if they were talking to a stubborn child.

“You would rather die alone today than in glory one far-off day?”

“I would live in shame and die in it.”

The Supreme Intelligence sighed once again: “Then you’ll both die alone today.”

Yon-Rogg didn’t care about what would happen to him but he couldn’t let Carol die – let alone all of the Skrulls. There had to be something he _could_ do. If only he could get out of the simulation to free her, if only he was like Carol.

But he wasn’t like her.

And never would be.

And yet,

_“You’re not alone, okay?”_

 the Supreme Intelligence was wrong.

“Neither of us is alone.”

_“As long as my girlfriend is willing to endure me.”_

_“What if there is no time limit to that?”_

_“I stand behind my words regardless.”_

“And neither of us is going to die.”

The Intelligence looked amused. “You aren’t her, Yon-Rogg. There is no way out for you – you are weak, _useless_ ,” they opened their arms in an in inviting manner. “But entertain me.”

_“Your love for her has always bothered us. Ruined a perfect soldier.”_

“You don’t have any power over me – you lost it the moment Carol came into my life _,_ ” he wished he had realized that sooner, perhaps neither of them would be in this situation if he had. But hopefully he could make all the lost time up to her. “I have always wondered why you only talk to Kree. I assumed no one else is worthy of talking to you, that Skrulls and Xandarians were too far beneath you to bother. But that’s not why you always left the interrogations of them to us, is it?”

They didn’t reply.

“You only have power over the Kree; only they follow you – only they are _willing_ to listen to you.”

“You _are_ a Kree,” the Intelligence stated calmly but quieter than before.

“And yet I refuse to continue listening.”

Their surroundings changed again and for a moment Yon-Rogg thought it was the Intelligence’s doing, however this strange sensation he felt, a sensation similar to the stage before waking and dreaming, made him realize _he_ was the one impacting the scenery.

“You let a Terran control you?” the Intelligence still pretended to be calm and in control but he could tell they weren’t. Not anymore.

“Yes,” Yon-Rogg replied, smiling at the memory of Carol. “I was born on Hala, born to follow you. But I _chose_ to follow Carol.”

“She doesn’t love you!” they lost their temper for a moment, revealing the panic they actually felt, as they made one last attempt to get to him. “She never did! _She_ was the one who send you back to Hala! Who didn’t care about what would happen to you!” The room continued to collapse. “She never cared about you! You have given up _everything_ for her and yet she had never given _anything_ back to you! You lost your status, all the admiration you once received – just because you fell in love with someone who will never feel the same for you! Who doesn’t believe in you! Who will never believe you! She only takes from you, has always done so! She stole your nights on Hala, your freedom outside of it, your time – even your love!”

“She has already given me so much more than I could ever give to her,” his face softened when he remembered the last couple of weeks with her and all the years on Hala. He thought of all the times her jokes had cheered him up, of all the hours he didn’t have to spend on his own as she was always around. He thanked her for trusting him despite having more than enough reason to never do so again, for defending him in front of everyone else, for the suit she had made for him and all the astronomy lessons, for being there for him so many times, for trying to prevent him from seeing his face branded as a traitor, for calling him brave, for wanting to be with him.

For saving him from living alone.

“She even gave me the strength to free myself from you.”

The simulation was almost gone now, the image of his mother barely visible.

“She-”

“- Is so much stronger than you,” Yon-Rogg refused to let them speak any further. He had listened to their words long enough. “And with her I am too.”

He opened his eyes and immediately found himself surrounded daylight so bright it pained him and yet felt so relieving. The wires connected to his body were completely gone; nothing prevented him from the hexagonal platform. He was alone – no one had to guard someone who was trapped in the simulation as it was absolutely impossible to break out anyway. _Perhaps_ , he thought, _they should change that system as well_.

Yon-Rogg didn’t waste any more time and started running. He didn’t care about searching for cover in case someone saw him; he didn’t care about making a plan. The Intelligence wanted her powers and they wouldn’t make the same mistake twice. He knew they wouldn’t wait and neither would he.

Talking to the Supreme Intelligence had made him lose any concept of time, he couldn’t tell if days had passed or just a couple of hours, all he could do was hoping he wouldn’t be too late. He knew how dangerous and exhausting the process of extracting the energy was, the doctors had explained it to him in detail when he had brought her to the med-bay for the first time. He knew the chances of survival were so small, they were basically non-existent. But even if they had already managed to get the core’s energy out of her, she still _had_ to be alive. She would be too stubborn to die. Even if it would kill everyone else - it wouldn’t kill her. Her Terran body had survived the explosion that provided her with the powers to begin with – and now she had his blood as well.

She wasn’t alone.

And hopefully his strength was enough for her to survive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't read the comments for the last chapter yet (I'll get to it right after posting this) but I hope none of you doubted my precious alien :p
> 
> I'll be leaving for London (to see Jude two (2) times!) in 10 days so unless something dramatic happens in my life I will make sure to post the next chapter before that!


	24. Our Past And Future

_She wasn’t worth the trouble, he realized that now. Yon-Rogg had hoped the Supreme Intelligence would approve of his decision to save her life – something he had clearly_ only _done to please them. But, for the first time, they were furious with him. Yelled about how he could dare to share his precious Kree blood with a lower being._

_He had apologized over and over again for his behavior, begged for their forgiveness, and in the end the Supremor at least was willing to let him train her, let him try to turn her into a proper weapon, to make up for his mistakes. And Yon-Rogg should be glad about the chance he got to prove himself, to prove he made the right choice - but he wasn’t._

_The truth was he didn’t want her to become a weapon._

_And now he doubted he even wanted her to be alive at all._

_The door to her room opened quietly and despite not being to see who entered due to the position of her bed, she somehow still knew it was him. Then again, no one else was actually visiting her._

_“Yon-Rogg!” she exclaimed, grinning happily as she was eating – though Yon-Rogg would rather call it gorging but maybe Terrans just ate that way – her breakfast. Knowing her it was probably already her third portion. Vers had surprised everyone by how quickly she was recovering. The doctors had predicted she’d be mostly sleeping the next couple of weeks so the fact that she was already able to sit up and eat on her own seemed like a miracle. They had attributed her strength to his blood, to compliment him, he supposed, but he knew it wasn’t_ his _doing. He himself, despite having been in a much better shape than her,  still felt dizzy from all the transfusions, so clearly it wasn’t_ his _blood._

_It was her Terran body, her volition that made her recover this fast. She had been too stubborn to die immediately after the explosion and now was too stubborn to recover at the pace that everyone had expected her to._

_“Vers,” he replied tiredly as he sat down next to her bed. After the consultation with the Supremor he really wasn’t in the mood to even speak to her._

_“You want something?” she picked up her plate and almost shoved into his face before, happily withdrawing it when he shook his head. “More for me then!”_

_He had to turn away and focus on one of the many displays that monitored her health to stop himself from smiling involuntarily._

_“You’re late,” she said while chewing on her food, something that Yon-Rogg considered as incredibly impolite but somehow it didn’t bother him like it should. Her tone didn’t bother him either. At this point he had already explained several times that he would be her commander, her boss essentially, assuming it would prompt her to speak in a more respectful manner-  but neither her mannerisms nor her language had changed at all. And somehow he was even happy about that._

_“How am I late when I didn’t announce my visit beforehand? Let alone the time of my arrival.”_

_“C’mon, you visit me every day,” she said as if he had just asked something incredibly stupid. “But you are later than usual. What did you do? Did you get me a present? Is that what took you so long?”_

_She smiled again and this time he couldn’t stop himself from smiling as well._

_“For what? All you do all day is sleep and eat.”_

_Vers gasped: “Excuse you? That’s absolutely not true. But you also shouldn’t need a special reason or occasion to get me something. I always deserve to get something.”_

_“Oh, do you?” He raised a brow. Her, well,_ humor _, had gotten her a lot of trouble with other Kree already, but it absolutely failed to insult him. In fact, he found her more amusing than anything._

_She nodded as she swallowed the last bite of her breakfast and Yon-Rogg expected her to go on an entire rant of how great she is to further pressure him into getting something for her but instead her face change and her tone became more serious._

_“Are you okay?”_

_He needed a moment to process that question: “What?”_

_“You seem so upset, I don’t know,” Vers explained before quickly trying to be more lighthearted, fearing she had asked him something inappropriate. Vers liked Yon-Rogg a lot, he was the only one who bothered to spend time with her, he didn’t seem to get offended about every little comment she made – and the only one who made her feel secure, like she actually belong somewhere. Not knowing anything, not even her own name, and waking up in a world that was foreign to her – or at least seemed to be foreign, because again she couldn’t remember anything –still scared her. She was feeling insecure and liked to hide her fear by making jokes. She wasn’t sure if he knew that, if that was the reason he never acted insulted, no matter what she said, but regardless if he was aware or not, she was incredibly thankful for what he did for her. And seeing how sad he was, how different from the days before, hurt her. Yet she also didn’t want to ruin their relationship by taking things too quick too far. “Maybe you just regret having refused my breakfast offer.”_

_Yon-Rogg frowned; surprised she could see something was troubling him as he liked to think he could hide his emotions really well._

_“Maybe I’m just tired of having to take care of you,” he suggested in a teasing tone, making her wrinkle her nose._

_“How rude.”_

_He chuckled until he saw her shocked face._

_“What?”_

_“You have never laughed around me before.”_

_To be fair, he wasn’t laughing very often in general. But he had a feeling that was about to change with her: “That should tell you how unfunny you are.”_

_“Hey!” She hit his arm teasingly and after a moment of shock on both sides as she had never done this before – in fact no one had ever done this to him - Yon-Rogg laughed._

_“You are still_ really _weak.”_

_“I just didn’t want to hurt you.”_

_“How gracious of you.”_

_He stood up now, offering his hand: “Are you strong enough to walk?”_

_“Of course I am,” Vers replied convincingly despite not being sure if she really was. “Where are we going?”_

_“I want to show you the city,” he helped Vers to get up and supported her while she took her first few steps without commenting on her strength, which she was thankful for._

_“Finally! I have seen nothing but this room every day.”_

_“You saw my face every day as well.”_

_“Both are very boring, yes.”_

_He smiled while shaking his head in disbelief, partly because of her teasing and partly because he had really thought she wasn’t worth the trouble._

_She absolutely_ was _worth it._

_She was worth everything._

He _had_ to find her, had to save her.

Even if she wouldn’t believe him, even if she hated him. He just wanted, _needed_ her to be safe.

Yon-Rogg was running down the seemingly endless corridor, not bothering to check every single door as he had figured the Supremor would have made sure to place at least two guards in front of the room they kept Carol in. A precaution, just to be save in case she was able to break out somehow. He didn’t know how many rooms or even floors there were in this building but he knew exactly where he should look for her.

He had already prevented the extraction of the core’s energy once and he would do it again, at the exact same place.  

There was no time to make a proper plan, to come up with a scheme to lure the guards away and get into the room unnoticed but that didn’t matter to Yon-Rogg. All that mattered was saving Carol. He had already knocked all three of the guards down before they could even react to his sudden arrival and as he impatiently opened the door he was ready to fight, to kill if necessary, everyone who was in his way. He loved Hala, loved his people. But he loved Carol so much more than that.

The chamber hadn’t changed much at all and so hadn’t the doctor who was standing next to Carol’s seemingly lifeless body. He had turned around in terror as Yon-Rogg entered and started to stammer something, probably an apology or a request to be merciful – or both, but Yon didn’t even bother to listen to him.

Without wasting any more time he angrily threw him across the room, not caring for his life at all as Yon-Rogg knew he wasn’t just innocently following orders. Even back then it had been clear to him that Vers was nothing more than a test object to the doctor, so his attitude towards Carol must have been exactly the same.

 “Carol!” Yon cried out, fearing the worst as she still hadn’t said anything but much to his relief she slowly lifted her head.

Of course she was still too stubborn to just die.

“What took you so long?” she grinned weakly as he approached her, his eyes scanning the wires she was connected to, figuring how to free her.

“Carol, I didn’t- I swear I-” her vision was still blurry but she could have sworn he had tears in his eyes. “I never did-”

“I know,” she replied softy.

“Really, I-” he was just about to carefully remove the last wire, trying his best to not harm her any further. “What?”

He had been terrified of her not believing him – not because of his honor as a Kree and her ally, not even because he wanted her to always trust him, but because he didn’t want to lose her. “You _‘know’_?”

“I trust you.” Carol groaned as she tried to lift herself up, making him quickly stabilize he before fully analyzing the situation. He had to move quickly. “But you are a fucking idiot.”

He smiled apologetic: “I thought you knew that already.”

“Why didn’t you say something?” it didn’t even sound like an accusation, rather like she just wanted to hear an explanation.

“I didn’t think you, let alone the Skrulls, would ever believe me,” he managed to open the metal box that had still been wrapped around her hands up to this point. “And I don’t understand why you _do_ believe me; I don’t exactly have the best track record, do I?”

As soon as her hands were free she hit his arm. “The next time something like this happens you open your stupid mouth!” He knew she was angry with him yet couldn’t help but to laugh; relieved she was strong enough even to be that mad to begin with.

“ _The next time_?” he grinned, inspecting the inhibitor on her neck.

“Stop laughing, asshole,” she hit him again but it only caused him to laugh more.

“Ouch, is that how you decided to thank your savior?”

“No, _this_ is,” she suddenly grabbed his collar to pull his face even closer to hers and pressed her lips onto his. It was a short, one-sided kiss as he was too overwhelmed, too shocked to return any of it and when had he finally regained his composure to react to what was happening, she had let go of him already.

“Alright, we don’t have time for this. Let’s go.”

Yon-Rogg, who was still baffled, shifted his attention on the inhibitor again: “You act like _I_ initiated that.”

He couldn’t attempt to free her from it, however, as right in that moment several guards stormed into the room. There was no time to figure out how to get rid of the device on her neck, they had to make it out without her powers.

“Now is the perfect opportunity to use all that knowledge I have taught you about hand-to-hand combat.”

“You won’t get me to admit it was useful.”

“You won’t need to admit it; I can see it with my own eyes.”

Just like they had been in the Starforce, they were perfectly in synch, easily overpowering out any opponent that dared to cross their path as they made their way out of the building. There was no need for verbal communication, they understood one another regardless and sensed when there was a need of a helping hand.

“Number eleven!” Carol happily exclaimed as she threw another Kree warrior into the wall.

“Thirteen,” Yon-Rogg drily commented as his opponent fell to the ground.

“You must be cheating,” she grumbled, already expecting him to break into an entire lecture about hand-to-hand-combat and the importance of controlling ones emotions like he used to. She had already thought of a witty reply when Yon suddenly hesitated as he was looking ahead. Then she saw him as well – Att-Lass.

Carol had always liked Att-Lass; in fact he had felt like a brother to her when they were still on the same team. She had come to the conclusion – and nothing during the past couple of years had suggested otherwise – that he hadn’t known about her true origin. Yon-Rogg, Minn-Erva and the Supreme Intelligence were the only ones who had lied to her, so she didn’t hold any grudges against him and would like to avoid a fight all together.

He seemed to feel the same as he clearly hesitate to step into action but before he could make his mind up about whether to intervene or not, Yon-Rogg had already knocked him down.

“Hey!” Carol hissed as they kept running towards the exit. “He could have helped us!”

“That’s what I was afraid of,” Yon didn’t look at her. “We don’t need to drag him into this.”

 

They had already made their way from Upper to Lower Hala when Carol started to wonder why their escape hadn’t triggered an alarm that would alert the entire city.

“Having to admit to the entire population of Hala that their probably most valuable prisoners managed to break out, would be an enormous embarrassment,” Yon-Rogg explained when they had started to slow down a bit to not attract too much attention. “The Supreme Intelligence wants to keep face more than anything.”

Carol wanted to reply something but she suddenly felt too weak to focus on her steps, let alone words. She began to fall behind, prompting Yon to gently pull her into the next narrow alley he could find. She clearly needed a break and this was the safest spot for such a thing.

She was exhausted, much more than she should be.

“We need to get rid of this,” he carefully pulled on the inhibitor until Carol flinched. “I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s a tracking device as well.”

 “Maybe we should split up,” Carol suggested and she leaned against the wall to support herself, breathing heavily. She didn’t want to be a burden, especially not to him.

He looked at her like she had just suggested the most outrageous thing in the universe.

“I’m not going to lose you again, Carol.”

She opened her mouth to argue but realized there was nothing she could say to change his mind so she gave in instead and tried pulling on inhibitor as well. This quick and relatively harmless motion was already incredibly painful; she didn’t even want to imagine what it would feel like to rip it off.

Yon frowned: “We won’t be able to separate from your skin.”

Carol immediately knew what he was implying and nodded when his eyes found hers, searching for approval.

They needed a sharp object, preferably a knife but Yon-Rogg knew their possibilities and time was limited so he settled for the next best thing. He smashed a window with his elbow, hoping the sound wouldn’t alarm anyone, and picked up one of the pieces that had fallen to the ground

Carol exposed as much as possible of her neck to give him more room to work with and without waiting any further he cut out the inhibitor along with the skin it was attached to. She painfully dug her nails into leg but all he could focus on was her agony. He was, however, relieved to see the device had only pierced into her skin, not the muscle, meaning the wound would keep bleeding for a while but should heal quickly and without any complications.

He tore a piece of fabric off his shirt, as he didn’t have anything else he could offer, and handed it to Carol to stop the bleeding as good as possible.

“Are you alright?” He shoved the inhibitor into a tiny hole in the wall, hoping the search would keep the ones following them occupied for a moment.

“Apart from the hole in my neck, yes.”

“Can you-”

Carol moved her hand, trying to feel the flow of energy through it – but she felt absolutely nothing.

“We’ll sort that out later,” he positioned himself in front of her before turning around, clearly implying he wants her to climb onto his back.”

“I can walk.”

“You are weak, stop arguing.”

Carol rolled her eyes but gave in.

 

She hadn’t recognized any of the streets Yon-Rogg carried her through. It was nighttime, thankfully, which didn’t change any of the lighting - as Lower Hala barely got any sunshine anyway - but meant there weren’t an awful lot of people running around.

They – or rather he – had been walking for quite a while before stopping in front of a building, a residence apparently, that, unlike most of the other buildings they had passed, was completely dark.

Wondering who lived there and if Yon-Rogg met these people after she had left the Empire – because surely he would have introduced them to her if he had known before that – she was surprised to see him place a hand on the scanner next to the door, which immediately granted them access.

He let her slide of his back and told her to sit down somewhere before explaining he’d try to find a medical kit or something of an equal value.

There was a couch right next to her, which made her believe she was standing in the living room – the lack of furniture made it hard to tell – but instead of giving into her body’s needs and finally rest, she decided to explore her surroundings.

The house wasn’t particularly big so she had managed to see every room before Yon-Rogg managed to track her down.

“Who lives here?” Carol asked, horrified to see a couple of toys lying on the ground. “I don’t want to endanger anyone. Let alone kids.”

“No one,” he replied, gently forcing her to sit down on the ground as there was no furniture. “You could have sat somewhere more comfortable, this is your own fault. Now hold still.”

He carefully replaced the fabric that was already soaked with blood and disinfected the wound before covering it with a proper bandage.

“Does it still hurt?”

She shook her head even though it did still sting a bit. Carol knew her body would be fully recovered in a matter of days but the fact that she had yet to feel her powers return worried her. What if Yon-Rogg had been too late?

“Someone is obviously living here,” she stated, mostly to distract herself from her thoughts.

Sitting down next to her, he sighed. He rubbed his eyes, finally allowing himself to begin to rest as well: “No, not anymore.”

“Then who did live here?”

“Me and my family did.”

Carol was shocked, at first, as she hadn’t known Yon-Rogg had a partner, let alone a child, but quickly realized what family he was actually talking about.

“Aw, so this is your room?” she grinned. Trying to imagine a tiny Yon-Rogg running around, she picked up a toy from the ground that seemed to resample a space ship.

“Yes, it was.”

“Did you share it with your brother?”

“No.”

It was obvious to her that he clearly didn’t enjoy being here so she wanted to comfort him but didn’t even know where to start. So instead she tried to shift the conversation into a different direction – although she didn’t expect this to be a pleasant conversation either.

“About what… uh _happened_ at the laboratory-”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“Huh?”

“The situation was tense, you could have died. It’s a natural reaction to-”

“Excuse me?” Yon almost flinched at the sudden insult and shock in her voice. “That’s what you think that was? A _natural reaction_?”

He could only nod as he didn’t know what else to say.

“Okay, fine, and what is this?” She pulled him into another kiss, exactly like she had before.

Yon blinked when she let go of him again: “Y- you are relieved we aren’t dead yet?”

She kissed him again, gentler this time, slower, and was pleasantly surprised when he finally returned it. Perhaps this wasn’t exactly like she had imagined it, given the circumstances, and he hadn’t even dared to imagine it to begin with, yet the sudden awareness that they both may actually feel the same about one another was so overwhelming that none of this mattered.

Even when they separated, they still hold onto each other, her forehead leaning against his.

“You are an idiot,” Carol commented, her eyes still closed.

“I begin to believe this is a compliment coming from you.”

“It’s the closest you’ll get to a compliment right now,” she grinned despite him slowly beginning to lift his head.

“We should go, shouldn’t we?” Carol really didn’t want to stand up, she wanted this moment to last forever, wanted to pretend they weren’t in danger, but both their lives were more important than keeping this fantasy alive – and besides, she realized, this probably wasn’t the last time they would kiss.

“I think we are safe - for now.”

Carol tried not to let guilt overwhelm her as she heard the word ‘safe’. She knew she couldn’t have freed the Skrulls before escaping, especially not without her powers, but she still felt like she should have at least tried.

“We’ll find them,” Yon reassured her as he stood up, reading her mind. “But we should find a more comfortable place to properly rest for a moment.”

“I’m really comfortable here,” she teased as she took the hand he offered and tried to pull him down again but instead he managed to pull her up.

“No,” he said firmly. “We are going to the living room.”

His tone told her this was somehow important to him so she followed without complaining any further and sat down on the couch next to him. And in the end there really was nothing she could actually complain about. It probably was the most comfortable spot in the house and he was still next to her regardless.

“What makes you think they won’t find us here?” she rather wanted to ask why he was behaving so strangely but figured he wouldn’t tell her anyway – and she was wondering this as well anyway.

“They _will_ find us,” he answered. “But I believe it will take them a while.”

“Why? This is your home after all. Surely the Supreme Intelligence will send them here.”

“It _was_ my home. A _very_ long time ago. We moved out when I was still very, very young yet it stayed family property.”

“But they must know this is where you would go-“

Yon-Rogg shook his head: “No. I kept, _keep_ avoiding thinking of this place. It’s probably one of the last places the Supremor expects me to seek shelter in.”

“Why?” Carol was confused. Yes, Yon-Rogg had never been very nostalgic but to outright avoid thinking of his old family home seemed odd, even for him. He didn’t reply. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have asked-”

“My mother,” he began suddenly, almost like something in him _wanted_ to tell her. “Was murdered here.”

“Oh,” she answered, feeling stupid she didn’t think of a better reply before opening her mouth – and for not figuring this out in the first place. “We can- I’m sure we’ll find a different place to stay at if you want.”

“No, there is no other place. Besides, your safety is more important than my… feelings.”

She took his hand into hers, gently running her thumb over the back of it.

“I’m so sorry. If there’s something I can do to make you feel better…”

To her surprise Yon-Rogg didn’t pull his hand away. She had expected him to go back into his shell like he had the first time she had learnt about his mother’s fate but instead he even turned his head to her and smiled. It was a sad smile but a smile nonetheless.

“You already do, don’t worry.”

“Do you want to talk about her?”

“I try to not think of her.”

“That’s not what I asked, Yon.”

He held on, considering her offer. Never had he told anyone about her, he hadn’t even really talked with his brother and father about her – Kree weren’t exactly sentimental – yet somehow he wished he had. Never mentioning her and even actively trying to not think about her, now seemed like he wanted to forget her, and that made him feel incredibly guilty. She was a wonderful woman; he had loved her and still did. She didn’t deserve to be forgotten.

“Maybe one day,” he finally answered. “Alright?”

“I don’t want to pressure you into anything. I just want you to know I’m here if you for you.”

He smiled again before he looked at the bandage on her neck.

“Can you use your powers now?”

Carol raised her hand again, acting like she needed to try it and didn’t feel the overwhelming absence of her powers the entire time. Nothing happened.

“I’m sure you are just exhausted,” Yon-Rogg concluded although he sounded more like he tried to calm her down and reassure her - not like he actually believed that. “Come here.”

He opened his arms in an inviting matter and Carol gladly cuddled onto him. This wasn’t exactly new to them, they had kept sharing a bed after all, but it did feel different now.

“Try to sleep for a few hours. We’ll figure everything out later.”

“Do you think Talos is alright?” Carol almost didn’t want to know his answer.

“I don’t think he is dead.”

That was probably as positive and realistic reply she could have gotten from him so she was thankful for it.

“It wasn’t you fault.”

“I know, I know,” she replied while making herself more comfortable on top of him, despite not being convinced of his statement. He gently ran his fingers through her hair, wishing he could make her believe it somehow.

It was unfair, in a way, the circumstances in which everything had happened in the past couple of hours, they both deserved better than that, they deserved a better first kiss, but Carol also realized they had more pressing matters to think about right now.

And maybe, just maybe, she thought before drifting away, it would have never happened otherwise. Maybe such drastic circumstances had been necessary for her to finally give into her feelings for him – and for him to do the same. Any maybe, just maybe, they still could win and defeat the Supreme Intelligence somehow. Maybe everything would be alright.

But she still couldn’t feel her powers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took forever, I had some real life issues but here it finally is! I also have a new Yonvers video (a happy one because I sometimes like to pretend I don't know what angst is): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jteGGX5GEDk
> 
> Also also I saw Jude (and his wife, they are fucking adorable) last month and(!) got a Yon-Rogg tattoo. It's on my hand. So I wrote half of this chapter with my new Yon-Rogg hand :P (it was also incredibly swollen for three days which was another reason why I couldn't post this sooner, I'm so sorry lmao)
> 
> Anyhow, I'll try to get the next chapter done before I go to Munich in two weeks (to see The New Pope, my Jude Law related real life is thriving).
> 
> (and it's 4am here so I'll reply to the comments for the last chapter after I've gotten some sleep)


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